There may be something else at play in that case, not simply "there is somebody to date for everyone".
Would actually be interesting to learn more about it.
Could be women attracted to bad boys. Or many they like the safety of the guy being behind bars. Or not being able to see someone makes it possible to dwell on the imagination. Also, helper syndrome.
"Psychologist and psychometrician Dr. Robert Sternberg, a former president of the University of Wyoming who currently teaches human development courses at Cornell, said: ‘Falling in love with a prisoner reduces your risk while preserving some of the excitement. For people who have issues with intimacy and commitment, it gives them an out of a having a relationship in which you can have the exciting passion without having to put in too much intimacy or passion."
"‘I think that what happens in these kinds of cases is that people, tend to build up a fantasy world. That’s what people do and who is to say to another person that you’re crazy and I’m not.’"
> arrested and convicted [...] we see an association with a variety of negative trends later in life, including lower chances of being married and less economic success,” Smith said.
> Could be women attracted to bad boys. Or many they like the safety of the guy being behind bars. Or not being able to see someone makes it possible to dwell on the imagination. Also, helper syndrome.
The answer to that is no, being man in or after prison does not make you more attractive to women. No, average woman is not attracted to safety of imprisoned males nor to he badness. Nor does absent husband makes imagination go wild and marriage better.
All these speculations as speculations about women are wrong based on stats.
And the bit about serial killer finding love is also dubious. We are talking about people with several emotional problems and lifetime of abuse (typically both as victims and perpetrators) on both sides. These are not kind of relationship a healthy blind or non blind person wants.
"No, average woman is not attracted to safety of imprisoned males nor to he badness."
Nobody claimed it's "average women" who are attracted to prisoners.
As for speculations, it seems to be a fact that some prisoners manage to form relationships with women. And the article I linked to also states some of the same reasons I speculated about.
What bothers you about it?
" These are not kind of relationship a healthy blind or non blind person wants."
Nobody is saying you should date a prisoner. Just that it seems to happen. That is not a matter of opinion, it is just reality.
As more Americans are arrested and convicted during their younger years, we see an association with a variety of negative trends later in life, including lower chances of being married and less economic success,” Smith said.
You keep sharing this survey, but it's talking about population-wide trends, not specific cases, so it's irrelevant to your parent commenter's point.
Their point was simply that a non-negligible number of men in prison can attract partners, which is obviously true.
That said, I don't think that's helpful information to an individual with an increasingly severe disability, and a belief or lived experience that others won't or don't see them as an attractive partner.
Once again you’re seeking to refute the existence of a small but significant number of cases by pointing to overall averages and trends.
It’s a significant enough phenomenon that media articles are written about it, academic studies are done on it, a scientific term has been coined for it, and multiple websites operate to facilitate it:
None of this contradicts your assertion that “people after prison have huge problems getting back to life including finding partners” - but that’s not a refutation of what I or the original commenter are arguing.
The article does not say significant number of prisoners finds love that way. It says literally: "It does occur - but as Cavendish points out, these instances are rare; [...] In short, the fantasy of these type situations rarely match the reality."
Article says the service exists and also that many those who write letters dont seek partner. (And also, I know about program where males write with prisoners and it is not about them being gay).
Quoting article: For those who instigate and sustain a relationship with a man imprisoned for a lengthy period of time, physical contact is obviously limited. They often never progress beyond the courting stage.
Yep, I read the article. Nobody said it wasn’t rare, or that many interactions that happen while the prisoner is inside turn into relationships after release. It’s a question of whether these interactions, or subsequent relationships, happen at all.
Anyway, we’re clearly in futile territory when we’re debating the definition of words like “significant” in a topic that has nothing to do with the article posted, so I’m certainly done here.
For the record I still don’t think it’s a helpful thing to point out to someone with a worsening disability; as the article and other commenters have pointed out, people who want to interact with prisoners have particular motivations, and they likely won’t apply to people with disabilities.
The blind man up thread wanted actual relationship, not just some communication over letters with someone who pitty you that ends soon.
It is not that he does not have chance. But common, it is harder for disabled people of both genders.
And yes, this thread made prison relationships sound way more probable then they are. It is much less convincing argument that "it is not entirely impossible and some few people can find relationship as prisoners".
And from discussion people did seemed to buy the "significant amount of prisoners get love" argument in it. Even speculating about women finding safety in ot or "liking bad" guys. Both very wrong conclusions.
