If you are frustrated and really feel you are struggling that much, I would suggest to look for a therapist.
Don't get me wrong. I don't think there is something wrong, but growing up in a difficult environment, shapes your view of your surroundings and judge it different than others. This are your experiences, you base your decisions on. If these judgments do not align with your surrounding, you will encounter disappointment.
A therapist will be able to ask you questions, which will open your mind to different point of views, which gives you the possibility to make different decisions.
Wish you all the best!
P.S.: I hope this is not offending, that's the last I want to express. English is not my mother tongue...
Don't get me wrong. I don't think there is something wrong, but growing up in a difficult environment, shapes your view of your surroundings and judge it different than others. This are your experiences, you base your decisions on. If these judgments do not align with your surrounding, you will encounter disappointment.
A therapist will be able to ask you questions, which will open your mind to different point of views, which gives you the possibility to make different decisions.
Wish you all the best!
P.S.: I hope this is not offending, that's the last I want to express. English is not my mother tongue...