I see where you are coming from and I felt urges to leave a comment on that page for reasons similar and others as well. It's almost as if the diagnosis permits the parents to allow their children to misbehave. The diagnosis explains away the need to punish them, it's just the way "I made my kid". That sounds worse if you ask me!
Before my son was diagnosed with any issues and before we had guidance, my son was is a constant state of being punished for behaviors that any parent would punish for. He hit the age where children become defiant and push boundaries and, having already had another older kid, we thought we knew what we were doing.
It turns out that really my son was suffering and punishing him for his behavior wasn't helping him. He was miserable, we were miserable, and nothing was improving. Only once we understood what we dealing with and changed away from thinking of his behavior as misbehaving did we start to make progress. And now he's a wonderful well behaved kid.
I think it's really important for kids with actual issues to be diagnosed. For every kid were diagnosis might possibly permit parents to make excuses for their children, I suspect there are 10 more with frustrated parents doing all the wrong things.
> It's almost as if the diagnosis permits the parents to allow their children to misbehave.
It may seem that way on the outside, but that's only because you haven't lived on the inside.
It's about understanding where these behaviors come from so that you and your child are better equipped to deal with them.
