I don't know what the typical HN user looks like, but anybody can work at being attractive regardless of their career or interests.
It's sort of a self-fulfilling role anyway. Staying away from an attractive woman makes you the loser. Having the mindset you just described does as well.
"self-fulfilling role" is another term for "blaming the victim." You know, that guy in a wheelchair could totally walk--he just doesn't want it enough.
Ok, well if you find your ability to appeal to women comparable to a paraplegic's ability to walk then I am truly sorry. Certain things like attractiveness do come with effort.
It is easy for the attractive to say that; like most traits, people don't like to believe dumb luck helped them. It makes a much better personal narrative if it was their own hard work. That doesn't mean it's backed up by any fact.
So what you're saying is you've never been to, say, a particularly hip bar or club in a big city.
Yes, the attractive women do have people who keep losers (like, say, the typical HN nerd) away. That's exactly how the real world works.