That's only a problem for people who want to find a spouse and have kids. You're going one step further down the "how" chain.
My point had more to do with the fact that a lot of people are either undecided about kids or have decided not to have kids, and are then struggling with loneliness.
Deciding you want to start a family and prioritizing it (the why) can come before the how.
I'm no expert in dating, but generally in life I've learned that it's easier to get my wants satisfied if I am clear about them.
"I want to start a family and find a partner who also wants to have kids" is a lot less abstract than "I want to feel less lonely".
So, no, I don't think I missed a step. I just think that the best way to find a partner in parenting will depend a lot on the specific person, where they are, how old they are, what they do, etc and isn't conducive to general advice, and maybe HN is not the best place to figure it out?
