Easy mate, take a deep breath. No need to blow your top off over a trivial remark. My observation was not meant to be in bad faith. I'm sorry you took it that way.
Sure, but don't blame your overreaction on others. If someone cuts in front of you in trafic and you get out of the car and beat them up with a a baseball bat in response, it's not an excuse that's gonna hold up in court. Someone's mistake is on them, but your reaction is always on you.
this entire sub-thread and dialogue is like an advertisement for finding a mentor as quick as possible.
on one hand you're talking about how you made it without one, then on the other hand you're also commiserating about being a (metaphorical) homeless lottery winner.
if I was a young'n in the industry i'd read this entire dialogue as a cautionary tale in the same kind of vein as a Zen koan or Aesop fable.
Definitely. Mentorship is symbiotic. I'll even argue therapeutic.
I lacked a lot of it through both work and personal lives. Simply left to figure things out. That, of course, had some impact. Certain skills are strong, others are weak.
I feel that's why I do well at SRE. Natural paranoia and so on. It also makes me goal oriented to the point of being nearly anti-social.
Overall, I'd say I'm worse off for my experiences. It makes me great when the sky is falling. It pretty much always is.
Due to that, I try to reflect and teach as much as I can. I'm one of the fortunate ones. While I'm here, I had to leave a lot of people behind. They can't speak at all.
That sounds like a war story, but aside from the 'atomic family', I'm really just talking about people who quit/moved elsewhere.
Filtering exists in the real world (work/personal), too - not just college. The things we do, and don't do, apply.
A weekly social event would do me a world of good, but I can't. That part of me is broken. Dress it up with work and I'm fine.
Helping people actually helps me. To hear that, no actually - my help isn't enough, was grating. It was wrong to take personally. Soft spot.
