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I asked my friends for anonymous feedback (ryanhoover.me)
2 points by tosh 23 days ago | hide | past | favorite | 2 comments



I did something really similar a few times between about 2010-2017 and wrote about it in 2017. "DIY 360° review: how I asked colleagues for anonymous feedback about myself": https://troy.yort.com/diy-360-review-how-i-asked-colleagues-...

I sent it to some friends as well.

When I first did this, I couldn't find anyone else who had shared that they did it. That's the main reason I wrote about it - to make it a bit more approachable for others.


"Lead with the heart more."

I'm not sure what led you to this conclusion but, absent complete context, this seems to speak more about your friends and their ego then something with you. Logic is not the enemy of emotion nor does logic preclude kindness, compassion or empathy. Logic is a decision making process that allows you to achieve outcomes, whatever that outcome may be.

The heart, has people call it, is the center of our ego. Ego is that self-important narcissistic and self-destructive impulse that we all have. Ego is the enemy of logic and leading with your heart because you may bruise a friend's ego shows a deep problem with that friend or with the friendship itself. Ego is what comes into play when a person says "you don't understand me". Because they never even stopped to think that maybe the other person understand perfectly but their own ego is preventing them from hearing it because they've adopted this policy of leading with their heart and never having to use logic to reevaluate their worldview. Ego is what says to us that we do not have to give the same consideration to others as we expect to receive and return.

All of the above statement is predicated on the lack of perfect context for this statement. It could be when you say you have a bias toward the logical it is to the exclusion of compassion and empathy. If that's what your friends are telling you then it is something you should work on. It is logical to be compassionate and to be empathetic toward others.




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