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> Daisy Greenwell and Clare Fernyhough set up a WhatsApp group to discuss how to stave off their young children’s demands for smartphones

IMHO "children's demands" is the problem to solve, as children should not be demanding anything.

My 9 yo asked me a few times why he doesn't have a phone and I said he will have one after he receives his first salary and buys the phone himself.



Children demand things all the time, but yes it's silly to always cater to their whims.

This is increasingly difficult when most other parents do, I've seen 5 year olds with their own phones. It's quite difficult to continue saying no as they age and this kind of thing becomes socially alienating. For my generation it's like "the kid without a tv at home" — the impact wasn't as large then as it is now, but there was a swath of popular culture that they couldn't participate in with their peers.

Now with a lot of socialization moving to social media, what does it mean when we don't let our children participate? I'm more on the "no phone" side of things, but it's hard to navigate.


> It's quite difficult to continue saying no as they age and this kind of thing becomes socially alienating

Being a parent is not supposed to be easy. Just be strong and keep in mind that this will be the best for them.


don’t tell other people what to do


That doesn't really answer this question though, you buy all kinds of other things for him. If you think it's unhealthy for children to have phones, is there a reason not to say that to him?


> you buy all kinds of other things for him

Not really. My children only gets gifts from me in their birthday and other holidays where it customary to give children presents.

I don't think it is healthy for children to get what they want, when they want.

> If you think it's unhealthy for children to have phones, is there a reason not to say that to him?

Most of his school friends have phones. If I tell him it is not healthy, then one of two things will happen:

- He will question why his friend's parents give them something unhealthy.

- He will repeat what I said to his friends.

I don't like where either of those outcomes can potentially lead, so I just say a phone is too expensive for me to buy. I also expect that this can drive him towards the "work hard" mindset, so that he can have the things he want in the future.




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