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Yes, it will be perceived as a stupid career move.

No, people won't really understand.

Is it a bad move? There are no bad moves, only bad reasons?

I was not CTO, but I was basically doing that job without the title. My company was slowly failing (although no-one would admit that at the time, it did go bankrupt 9 months after I quit). We'd moved to NYC for the company, on a company-sponsored visa. My partner and I had just had our first child. Like your "friend", I was pretty tired of management, politics, the constant scramble, and trying to fit some actual building stuff in between.

So I quit, moved back to my home country, took a few contracting gigs for a while, and then went full-time as a software engineer at a medium-sized company.

It was absolutely a backwards step, career-wise. Less pay, disconnected from the startup scene, outside the networks I'd spent years building. It easily put me back 5 years, probably more like 10, in terms of career.

OTOH, I was working from home, with heaps of flexibility, which was perfect when my kid was little. For a while, we both worked 4 days, one weekday off each at home just hanging out with the kid. Work was fine, but I kicked the obsession that it had just about become.

10 years later, I haven't tried to climb back. I do 5 days full-time now, but I'm just a senior engineer. I miss the challenges, but not enough to want to go back. I get paid less, but I'll probably live longer, and certainly better, this way.

Everyone's different. Some people leave tech, and make furniture in the woods. Some people just pull back a bit. You can pause and then have another tilt at it once you've recovered a bit. There's no rule book, really. Do what feels right and good.




Thank you for sharing. I feel like this is sound advice though everyone’s mileage may vary, so to speak.


Thanks, I appreciate your perspective!




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