Ask HN: How do I find the right mentor with proven experience?

[neon_me]

TLDR: Do you have a mentor? If so, how did you find them?

I've built successful products and services, worn various hats in startups (from early employee to founder), and have over 15 years of industry experience. While I'm proud of my journey, I want to keep pushing myself.

Here's my challenge:

1. Friends: They're either too busy or don't have deep expertise in my field. 2. Therapy: Great for life struggles, but not for technical advice or business strategy. 3. Online platforms: While there are talented folks out there, it's difficult to find experienced mentors with a genuine track record, not just years at a big company or generic motivational advice.

Do you have a mentor? If so, how did you find them?

[itzprime]

You have 15 years of experience. You are likely the mentor, than the mentee. Anyway here is the easiest one: https://sive.rs/ment

[neon_me → itzprime]

The more I know, the more I realize how much I don't know... you make a fair point. Challenges definitely evolve throughout a career. Lately, mine have shifted towards C-level decisions and their life-altering consequences. Discussing these "struggles" with those who've navigated this path could be extremely valuable.

[coldtrait → itzprime]

Clearly this is the right answer.

OP, can you mentor me?

[eimrine]

Who is supposed to be a mentor for somebody with 15 years of experience, 30 years of experience? Probably you need some students more than mentors.

[codingdave → eimrine]

Yes. And people with 30 years experience can be mentored by people with 50. People with 50 years experience can be mentored by people 20 years into retirement.

Learning and growing is constant through life. (Or at least, it can be.) You always have somewhere else to grow, and until you are the person who has been retired 20 years, there is always someone ahead of you on the path who can help guide you.

You can also be a mentor. Just because you are learning from your elders doesn't mean you cannot be the elder mentor to others. Pass the knowledge down.

[neon_me → eimrine]

Good point. Mentoring benefits both parties. What kinds of mentorship relationships have you found valuable, whether as mentor or mentee?

[peter_d_sherman]

What are you trying to do, exactly?

Your first goal -- should be stating your own exact goal as simply and succinctly as possible.

That is, first state the exact goal that you require this mentor for.

And state it "as simple as possible -- but not simpler".

You know, to quote Albert Einstein...

From the text in your post, I cannot determine exactly what you want to achieve.

Do you want more money? If so, how much exactly?

Do you want to run a company? If so, what kind of company specifically?

Do you want more/better friends? If so, what kind of friends and how many?

What goal do you wish for, exactly?

The first thing I would do is to define (magical word, "define", it means to describe in detail, and from earlier Latin "de fine" -- "to bound, to limit") exactly what your goal is.

From there, you'd determine a pool of possible mentors; candidate mentors -- you'd carefully select at least 20 candidates -- and then you'd try to persuade each one (in order of desirability) that you were worth taking on as someone to be mentored.

You'd prepare (on average, statistically) for 18 rejects, one "maybe" and one "yes" (The "Law Of 20" -- I've written about this in an earlier post).

You'd go with the person issuing the "yes" vote -- once you received it.

But the absolute first thing you want to do -- is to define your goal (in writing), taking great care to be as exact as possible in that writing!

Do that, and now you've got the initial stage of a roadmap to find your mentor!

Anyway, wishing you great luck in that search!

-Peter

(Also, you can email me:

peter.d.sherman@gmail.com

I can help you clarify and refine your goals -- for free!

Just reach out and say 'hi'!)

[apache101]

What areas would you like to get better at technically?

If you can teach me a bit about business I'd be keen to teach you what I know about Devops ( I work with Kubernetes, GCP and AWS) and infosec.

[neon_me]

I found some community platform -> https://www.mentoring-club.com - let's give it a shot

[pantantrant]

Maybe the mentors were the friends we made along the way

[brudgers]

Who do you want to be your mentor?

Ask them.

Good luck.