I can relate a lot. Having the momentum on your side is the main force that pushes such a project forward. Especially if you have family duties that ususally consume most of your free time.
As long as children are smaller even things like scheduling time for your projects don't work very well. Usually because unexpected things happen that need to be handled. Sickness, children waking up early or taking longer to go to sleep, etc..
Absolutely, I just have to see how it goes on the day, if they get to sleep easily and on time I have a couple of hours maybe after doing the chores, but more often than not I'll come and sit down at my desk and just think; I'm too tired, or not in the mood for this, and I decided recently that that's fine.
I was talking to my wife about this over dinner the other day. At one point, early after the kids came along, this really bothered me, not being able to do my projects/hobbies, but I came to a realisation, once things had settled down a bit.
Even though I _want_ to do these things, I want to spend time with my kids, my family, more, and these other things are inconsequential whether they happen or not.
I'm never likely to look back and think "I regret not building X with an ESP32", and I don't intend to look back and wish I'd spent more time with my kids, they grow up quick.
Don't get me wrong, I still find time for hobbies, and little projects; much less so than I did, but now I just find I need/want to spend less of my time building/tinkering with things that no longer have the same value to me that they used to, my brain is slowly catching up with that realisation.
Yes, it took me some time to adapt to the fact that there is much less time for your own projects. Now I'm totally fine with that. The good thing is, the kids grow older and suddenly time windows become available again.
I once read that about 80% of the whole time you spent together with your children is spent before they are 10 years old. So your are right when you say your want to spent the time with your children now.
As long as children are smaller even things like scheduling time for your projects don't work very well. Usually because unexpected things happen that need to be handled. Sickness, children waking up early or taking longer to go to sleep, etc..