I wonder if you could obtain stimulants and if it would help your particular situation. It's not like ADHD meds are somehow chemically designed to help only with ADHD. They can help with working memory issues and with chronic fatigue like symptoms.
I'm thinking about something like Concerta, aka extended release Methylphenidate. Probably low or medium dose. I'm specifically mentioning this because you seem like you could be at risk of burnout or just pushing yourself too hard. And being on a lower extended release dose limits how much a stimulant enables you to push yourself too hard, in my experience.
I've read studies referring to stimulants as helping "normalize" an ADHD brain over time, so it's not unthinkable it could help "normalize" a brain in other situations, though what exactly that word means is probably medically tumultuous. But, in short, I think stimulants have the ability to change a brain over time, not simply be a "pick me up".
I don't know what the chance of this helping is, but I felt obligated to mention it, because in your situation I'd be willing to try anything that didn't have a chance of further messing me up. And stimulants in therapeutic doses have an extremely low rate of long lasting side effects, but again, your situation could be really different.
I'm thinking about something like Concerta, aka extended release Methylphenidate. Probably low or medium dose. I'm specifically mentioning this because you seem like you could be at risk of burnout or just pushing yourself too hard. And being on a lower extended release dose limits how much a stimulant enables you to push yourself too hard, in my experience.
The idea isn't entirely novel: - https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC9214912/ - https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26991608/
I've read studies referring to stimulants as helping "normalize" an ADHD brain over time, so it's not unthinkable it could help "normalize" a brain in other situations, though what exactly that word means is probably medically tumultuous. But, in short, I think stimulants have the ability to change a brain over time, not simply be a "pick me up".
I don't know what the chance of this helping is, but I felt obligated to mention it, because in your situation I'd be willing to try anything that didn't have a chance of further messing me up. And stimulants in therapeutic doses have an extremely low rate of long lasting side effects, but again, your situation could be really different.