That cannot be a serious proposal. These attacks can and do happen, and it's in our interest to design systems that make them as hard as possible.
I'll take "nightmarish complexity" that puts these attacks outside of the scope of a technically savvy teenager over having to carry my machine with me everywhere I go, any day of the week.
Did you try OpenBSD with bioctl?
You can tamper with the bootloader, but not the rest. And you can always set the bootloader in another media and always boot from that.
Tampering with the bootloader is game over. And what, are you keeping this other bootloader medium on your person and in your sight at all times? It's never ever unattended?
Using TPM with closed source firmware, especially written and designed by Microsoft, probably full of backdoors, when you don't even know what it's doing is a worse choice.
No, thanks, bioctl(4) works well under OpenBSD for disk encryption and so will do under HyperbolaBSD.