One of the things you hear a lot of between accountability partners (look it up if you are unfamiliar) is the phrase "stay strong" and similar stuff like "stay solid". That really sums it up in a very nuanced way. It's not giving in, it's doing something that takes mental strength, and yes, it may take building that mental "muscle".
I also see it as being primarily about intent, which forms the metaphorical foundation of that muscle. The "skeleton".
E.g., for any smoker reading, you apparently want to quit smoking. Why? Are you sure that's why? Do you actually want that for yourself yet, or is that peer pressure? Do you actually care? Why? Why not?
It's equally about living with consequence.
E.g., if you give in, you'll feel better for a short time, but you are back at square one to getting over the problem, and all your previous efforts are all for nothing. You failed, you wasted time and energy and will need to go through feeling like crap all over again, but you could have just said "no" and held out and never need to feel this crap again.
For some people, cold turkey is the only way. For others, it needs to be gradual, but for a lot of people, they don't actually need gradual, it's kidding themselves they're quitting and doing something about the problem, and in turn kidding others. I'd say in most cases, the only way you're going to get through it is cold turkey, period, and just ride out the shitty feeling, it's got to happen at some point, may as well be now if you're serious.
The "rest days" are not uncommonly complete relapses in addiction for most people. The reward is not smoking, the reward isn't a compromise of smoking now and then or having a glass of wine instead. This is why I say intent is everything. The "skeleton" you're applying that "muscle" to will get crushed if the intent isn't solid.
It's a very interesting topic of discussion to be honest. That smoking has a physiological and sociological impact makes it fascinating in how it's solved.
To anybody who doesn't smoke but is considering it, really, don't. All fun and games until you're hooked, and you will be.
I also see it as being primarily about intent, which forms the metaphorical foundation of that muscle. The "skeleton".
E.g., for any smoker reading, you apparently want to quit smoking. Why? Are you sure that's why? Do you actually want that for yourself yet, or is that peer pressure? Do you actually care? Why? Why not?
It's equally about living with consequence.
E.g., if you give in, you'll feel better for a short time, but you are back at square one to getting over the problem, and all your previous efforts are all for nothing. You failed, you wasted time and energy and will need to go through feeling like crap all over again, but you could have just said "no" and held out and never need to feel this crap again.
For some people, cold turkey is the only way. For others, it needs to be gradual, but for a lot of people, they don't actually need gradual, it's kidding themselves they're quitting and doing something about the problem, and in turn kidding others. I'd say in most cases, the only way you're going to get through it is cold turkey, period, and just ride out the shitty feeling, it's got to happen at some point, may as well be now if you're serious.
The "rest days" are not uncommonly complete relapses in addiction for most people. The reward is not smoking, the reward isn't a compromise of smoking now and then or having a glass of wine instead. This is why I say intent is everything. The "skeleton" you're applying that "muscle" to will get crushed if the intent isn't solid.
It's a very interesting topic of discussion to be honest. That smoking has a physiological and sociological impact makes it fascinating in how it's solved.
To anybody who doesn't smoke but is considering it, really, don't. All fun and games until you're hooked, and you will be.