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Can I ask - if you had the choice between attending treatment or being grounded, why did you choose to be grounded?



None of my family or friends were aware of my drug use at any point. That choice was not presented to me.

Furthermore, rehab would not have fixed my conditions that led to addiction. I turned 18, my father moved out, I immediately found better things to do with my time now that I was free to plan my own day. And I never struggled with addiction again.

I don’t think rehab would have helped, because it couldn’t solve my actual problem.


I'm glad you're doing better these days, but it's not at all clear to me how your experience relates to my original comment. In that comment, I suggested that parents should use the restriction of privileges to incentivize a non-compliant child to get the appropriate treatment for a substance abuse disorder. You indicated that your father restricted your privileges for such a long time it had a negative impact on your development but that your father was not aware of your substance abuse disorder. Then, the restrictions couldn't have been to incentivize you to get treatment. So how was your dad's strategy similar to my suggestion?


I'm glad you're doing better these days. As a father to very young kids, I'm curious to learn what I can from your experience. Was your father controlling you in a misguided but well-meaning attempt to shield you from "bad" stuff? Or was it more malicious? I don't plan to be the second type, but if your dad was also trying his best, how does a parent balance preventing obvious bad things from happening but also give enough freedom to not stifle the kid?




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