Not OP, but I think I get what you mean - my own son, who just started college, went through the same grind and honestly had been on it since elementary school. So technically, no, nobody has to do this stuff, and in reality there's a low ROI for most of it. My son (chose to) do a lot of extracurriculars to fluff up his college application in the hopes of getting into an MIT or a Stanford... and still didn't get in. He could have gotten away with doing a lot less than he did and still would have ended up in the same (good) state school he ended up in. But kids in affluent areas are surrounded by suggestions that you do have to do this stuff to get into a "good" school, so they get caught up in it.
why does he _have_ to do anything you say he _has_ to do?