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Don't know if UX is as big of a problem as you think. My understanding is that the problem with self hosting is reliability and spam prevention.

For reliability, self hosting a server that will always be available is hard. Not getting an important email because your server went offline is a massive bummer.

Similarly, while filtering spam on your end might be doable, self hosted email servers are often filtered by major email providers for looking like spam.




Is there a known solution for this? Use Gmail as a relay? Use sendgrid for inbound?




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