I constantly wonder, however, if my true purpose is to be a failure. Maybe God needs someone for others to point at and say "see that guy, don't live your life that way."
Have felt similar. I had money and the woman and the house and blah blah, so what? Kind of discovered being a father and somewhat of a leader is my purpose, plenty of people below you that you can help if you're even a mediocre software engineer. I really stopped thinking about myself.
> Maybe God needs someone for others to point at and say "see that guy, don't live your life that way."
There are plenty of them already. The shortage God has are the people who look at where they are, maybe not the best place, and look for the steps to climb out. They’re sometimes hidden but they’re always there, sometimes in plain sight.