I feel like part of the problem is the obsession in media and social circles with young success. I see lists like Forbes 30 under 30, 40 under 40, and the celebration of young billionaires who are worshipped and held up as the example of what high performers should strive to be, and its quite unhealthy. I wish there were more stories about people who found success in their 40's, 50's and beyond, especially the ones who took time to fail, learn from it, and apply it later in life.
Yeah, but those people are the one-in-100-million types.
Most people have lack-luster careers in their 20s, which pick up in their 30s and peak in their 40s-50s. It makes a lot of sense for the average person to prioritize family building in their early 20s so that the kids are more self-sufficient right at the time where your career is taking off.
Plus, if your blessed enough to have parents who can help out, having babies when your parents are in their 40s-50s is substantially better than when they are 60+. My parents (50s) do really well at caring for their grandkids while my in-laws (60s) actually aren't capable of being alone with their grandkids, aunts or uncles "come to visit" anytime they watch the kids.
> It makes a lot of sense for the average person to prioritize family building in their early 20s
I'd say it used to make sense before the late 1970's when wages started stagnating. As the gap has grown the average person in their early 20's has to struggle to afford to pay for their own basic needs, much less trying to afford to have kids. Once their career is starting to pick up in their 30s they finally have the financial situation to start considering kids.
> It makes a lot of sense for the average person to prioritize family building in their early 20s so that the kids are more self-sufficient right at the time where your career is taking off.
It does make a lot of sense, but my point is that's not what people are doing. The ages that women have their first babies have been increasing [0], and a large part of that is that women are more focused on their careers in their 20's than they have been in the past [1].
