Leverage your experience and knowledge. Dont start from scratch.
Do some node-backend projects and working your way into a decent full time position.
OR try full stack development of react + java backend.
Jhipster sets u up with a full SAAS demo-type app with java-spring-boot, SQL, and react. You need to learn about hosting, DB, config, network issues, etc.
Just getting a full app hosted and working on a free heroku server will give some starter backend experience.
If you are willing to put in the time, u can do a first backend gig by combining this with some minimal front end react work.
Where r u located?
p.s. it also sounds like you have some burn out and life issues - which may or may not be solved by better work
Do some node-backend projects and working your way into a decent full time position.
OR try full stack development of react + java backend.
Jhipster sets u up with a full SAAS demo-type app with java-spring-boot, SQL, and react. You need to learn about hosting, DB, config, network issues, etc. Just getting a full app hosted and working on a free heroku server will give some starter backend experience.
If you are willing to put in the time, u can do a first backend gig by combining this with some minimal front end react work.
Where r u located?
p.s. it also sounds like you have some burn out and life issues - which may or may not be solved by better work