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You are forgetting about a 17th-century invention based on running water [1] which, by the way, to this day is considered by many to be significantly more hygienic than wiping.

[1] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bidet



That device doesn't seem very portable. I guess there are trade-offs to everything.


Yes, they don't leave the bathrooms... which is where >99% of your #2's take place.




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