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Ask HN: How do you mantain your current lifestyle in times of big income?
18 points by mxmpawn on June 6, 2019 | hide | past | favorite | 21 comments
Hi, I've been working for several years as a Software Engineer, always getting a little more than the market income. I live with my SO and we own an apartment (no kids) so my basic expenses are low.

Last year I started earning way above what I was earning, something like five times what I need with my current lifestyle.

I was always pretty frugal with my money and I don't own too much, but I'm noticing that I'm losing "pricing sensibility" compared to family, friends and some coworkers. As a result of this I'm slowly starting to increase eating out at above average places and taking trips more frequently.

I don't want to make the common error of raising my lifestyle according to my income, because I like the flexibility that a frugal lifestyle and I'd like to have the possibility earn less than the actual income if I want to switch jobs.

Are you in a similar situation? How do you deal with this kind of "issues"?




It seems you are happy with it. "I'm slowly starting to increase eating out at above average places and taking trips more frequently." That is life. That's why we live. You deserve it.

There is a significant difference in quality between eating out in a $10 place or a $100 place. Yet, the difference between a $100 place and a $1000 place is pretty small.

It applies to almost everything: entertainment, food, computer equipment, traveling, etc. The first order of magnitude is the one that will give you more bang for your buck, don't jump to the second order of magnitude.


This question sounds like you are having a "lifestyle creep" problem. Which is super legit... I fight with the same problem and am interested with HN advice on the subject.

Here are the things I've done (please give me more!):

* I'm very clear with the definition of "want" versus "need", and when making any purchases especially major ones I'm clear with which of the two the purchase is.

* Once a month I run through my finances to keep myself grounded. If I see that I spent $60 on lattes, I know that I'm out of control in that area and tighten up.

* I separate my money into various accounts when it comes in. As mentioned Vanguard is a useful tool for auto deductions from the checking account.

* Lastly, I try to remind myself of the times when I didn't have much, and give myself the old "winter is coming" pep-talk. All of us/ Any of us that are working for a wage (W2 land) could be promoted to customer at the bat of a managers eye... and that is exactly the moment when you will wish you had saved. I.E. the "Ant and the grasshopper" moment.


Start a weekly or monthly investment in a Vanguard index fund of most of the extra. Leave yourself a bit, you've earned it.


This is fine investment advice... but the post isn't asking for investment advice. It's asking for advice on fighting lifestyle creep. Besides, there are a variety of ways to invest one's money, why provide only one vehicle as advice for investing?


The "invest most of it" was the way to fight lifestyle creep. If you've made it "disappear" into a Vanguard fund (or whatever), then you don't have it "available" to tempt you into spending it. You set your budget/expectations/lifestyle for what you have left after investing most of the surplus.


I think the idea is to give a very clear route for fighting lifestyle creep. Sure there are other options, but this is actionable advice. The question was also asking how do you do it so it may be how that user fights lifestyle creep.


I'm 19 years old and I left the US because everything is so expensive. There's just no way to live on your own or even comfortably without a high paying degree. I now live in Eastern Europe on $400 a month. My standard of living is many times higher than if I was living in the US.


And chicks are hotter :)


I apologize in advance for my stream of consciousness.

I found myself in a similar situation when I started working after graduate school. I continued to live like a poor grad student as my income became an order of magnitude higher than my expenses. Changing my expenses would have actually taken congnitive overhead, so my expenses barely increased for years. I just saved the difference in Vanguard's VTSAX.

Gradually, during busier times of my life, I did start to eat out more and more. Then I gained a lot of weight from it -- for me, eating out almost always meant eating more food than I should consume, and it's often unhealthy food. I eventually pulled myself together and cook almost all of my food at home now. I also get more joy drinking coffee at home, reading in the morning, than buying it out. Although I don't cap my grocery budget, it's significantly healthier, and spending can still only get so high if I'm not wasting food.

At this point, living life feels much like a game. Money equates to a kind of resource point that is useful to achieve goals, and it is worthwhile to manage and "cultivate" this resource, but it's not an end to itself. "Winning" isn't getting more resource points, it's to maximize joy (or other "fullfillment" however you may wish to define it). Spending resources doesn't necessarily increase joy , though it does provide opportunities. A great many things that increase joy are either free or linked to lower resource spending vs. alternatives (e.g., cooking at home is healthier and usually cheaper, and for me, often tastier, a smaller home "forces" more social interaction with family, which can often lead to a less lonely life, frugal spending while traveling can lead to you staying in hostels and meeting other friendly travelers, etc...).

Preserving and managing your resource can also let you optimize long-term choices, perhaps getting you to FIRE (Financially Independent, Retire Early). Even if you don't want to retire early, it allows choice to leave a job that isn't leaving you personally fulfilled.

Good luck!


Not 100% on-topic, but thought you might appreciate the lateral thinking...

I donate that stuff. That income above life-sustainment and above lifestyle and comfort and luxury. Still I'm finding there's more and more to spend.

But I don't need it, better to pass it on to communities and creators that I enjoy. Patreon, individual monthly checks automatically sent from my bank, paypal monthly donations, etc... All for artists to create more of their work I enjoy, archives to continue to flourish.

Maybe try that?

Why suggest donation? It's an infinitely large set of buckets to put money into.


This is really poor advice, focused entirely on the short term, which is something the OP wants to avoid doing.


No, this is long term advice.

Regular donations decrease the overall wealth removing the drag of lifestyle creep.


You're very generous.


It sounds like you already have a "budget" that you stick to. I personally am frugal like you and have a budget that I roughly stick to.

As jppope points out, figuring out need vs want is really important and checking back on you "budget" monthly really helps.

If you don't do this already, don't keep your checking and savings mixed. Keep checking at a "zero-balance" which would be something where if a paycheck didn't come through you could pay your highest debt while a transfer from your emergency fund came through.

This keeps you feeling like you don't have money to spend and since your savings/emergency fund aren't in views eye, you don't feel the need to spend it.


I think the key is to keep your necessary expenses low. For instance, don't go buy a house and a couple of cars that you can only afford because you are now making 5x more money. If you keep those things in check, then you should still have the freedom that your previous lifestyle offered.

The other thing to think about is are you happy and doing these extra things or are you doing these thing to be happy. As long as you stay in the former, you should be able to cut out the extras if you need to.

In the meantime, do you. You've earned it.


I'd suggest paying yourself a salary out of your salary. So as soon as money comes in put it into an investment that is at least a little painful to remove such as a 401k/IRA.


Exactly what I'm doing. I've been paying myself a fixed salary for a couple years now, regardless of how much I actually make in a given month (the rest goes into savings). I haven't dipped into savings yet, and don't feel any cravings to do so - I just don't think that most things you can buy really add that much value. And for things that do, you can get very similar effect whether you splurge or go more frugal - i.e. a trip's value is most likely going to be determined by your companion/s and how much fun you had with each other, and not whether you went to Africa or just camped in local forest.

BTW, eating out at more upscale places, buying branded stuff are (at least in my case) just forms of treating boredom with consumerism, which I know from experience, does not bring me any happiness. It took me a year of two of spending 100% of my income until I noticed that, so maybe you need to see the effect on yourself as well.


set up systems that take money out of your bank account and into investment vehicles (people have suggested a few in this thread) right when your paycheck arrives. Leave a pre-set amount in your bank account to pay your credit card bills, rent etc.

Usually retrieving those amounts from investment vehicles is painful, so you'll be forced to watch your spending, and perhaps budget.


I'm in a similar situation. I decides to startup tracking ALL of my monthly expenses to build an average budget. With this budget in mind I'll randomly generate below and above average monthly budgets. The idea would be to never get used to spend a fixed amount of money, experiencing different things from month to month.


Paying down debt and building savings. We still go clothes shopping at goodwill regularly too.


Watch @goin1836 videos on tiktok. He will show you how to save money.




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