I’m sure the sentiment up top is true, but the other side of this is that in technical jobs I’ve had, I’ve driven certain people up the wall by (they would say) not taking them seriously enough. However, these were all fairly arrogant, manipulative people. Humble, trustworthy senior coworkers were always given immediate respect and deference by me. I wonder whether some people don’t have a natural defense mechanism by writing off even good advice and expertise from people they can tell are manipulative and untrustworthy.
That's fair, but often those we perceive as arrogant, especially in the field of engineering have challenges with communication and soft skills. Some never really learn to overcome that. Those that could easily be perceived as arrogant are often saddled with an inability to communicate the bigger picture effectively. This can come off as arrogant until you've spent a few months getting to know them.
That's not to say there aren't those who are manipulative and untrustworthy, there are many of those too - with plenty of ego to overcome or sidestep. It's something to be cautious of, but not everyone is as they first appear - especially in an industry where social skills aren't exactly a strong suit.
I, personally, have quite a few personality quirks... I've been in software development, specifically in web based applications for over two decades. This past year, I've actually worked with someone who has pretty much all of my own personality quirks, but dialed up to 11.
I've never had so many things make so much more sense to me now, than at any point I was ever given advice in the past.
I've also been through a little bit of management training... The Arbinger Institute books (been through 2) have been pretty good in this regard too. "Leadership and Self Deception: Getting Out of The Box" as well as "The Outward Mindset"
