Hacker News new | past | comments | ask | show | jobs | submit login

Yikes, crossing into personal nastiness is not cool and will get you banned here. Please don't do that! Please do review https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html.

If another user broke the guidelines (such as by accusing you of shilling) and we missed it, you're welcome to let us know by emailing hn@ycombinator.com. Or by simply flagging the comment, which usually brings it to a moderator's attention.




I have no idea how what I said was nasty or personal, unless if describing past experiences and personal wishes are against the rules. I’ve reported plenty of things they’ve said to me, I believe some of them got modded away, and I’m expressing an interest to not engage with them again over the same things. How is that personally nasty?


Let me try to explain. The main thing is: if you're combining personal language with pejoratives, your internet comment is likely to come across as a personal attack, unless you find a way to explicitly show that you don't mean it that way. That is not always so easy, so it's safer just not to combine personal language with pejoratives in the first place. By pejoratives I mean words like "negative", "bait people", etc., but also grammatical constructs like "I'm not going to X with you just so you can Y" and "If you want to X, find someone else", which carry a reproachful charge.

In the case of that particular comment, your use of hyperbole intensified the effect. "I’ve had enough negative experiences with you for one life" is the sort of thing said by lovers who are about to become exes. Ditto for "I’m not going to chat with you just for you to call me an X again", and so on. This language is way, way too intense for an internet forum disagreement. If you go there, then on a meta level you're communicating something much more personal than the format calls for. Even if the other user did treat you unfairly in the past, you end up positioning yourself as the one who is most out of line, and your comment is likely to strike most readers the way it struck me.


It seems that we have wildly different definitions of what pejorative means. I am describing my experiences, their actions, and my wishes. I’m not labeling them as a person or describing them in intrinsic ways. If saying “you did X to me” or “I don’t want Y” is pejorative I’m not really sure what to tell you.

If I’d said “you’re an X person” or “you’re Y”, I would understand. But I didn’t do that.

I would also like to point out that my complaint about them interpreting my words in bad faith, a pejorative according to you, was exactly what they were doing in that comment, as they literally made up a weak argument on my behalf and then shot it down. (I also must complain about the FUD bit, which I’d argue is similar to calling me a shill).

Next time I’ll just flag and move on I guess, but I genuinely do not understand what you’re on about here.




Join us for AI Startup School this June 16-17 in San Francisco!

Guidelines | FAQ | Lists | API | Security | Legal | Apply to YC | Contact

Search: