Hi HN,
I have autism and I just did a round of on-site interviews. What stuck out to me was that I was mostly able to get the answer to problems, but I felt (subjectively, because no company will ever give feedback) that I came off slow, because I was overwhelmed by being in a new place, around new people. There was one answer that I understood that the interviewer thought I didn't get because of this.
I also am prone to anxiety. One interview I had a full on anxiety attack, and even though one of the interviewers mentioned that he wanted me on the team, I was rejected. I feel, subjectively, that it was my panic attack not my coding ability that was rejected. I've tried really hard, and improved lots on that front over the years, but apparently not enough.
Have you been through similar experiences? What worked, didn't work? Are there better ways to approach recruiters about why I feel like I'm failing?
I'm also aware that people are not hiring "brilliant assholes". People with autism often are thought to not have empathy. I don't know if I'm doing a good job communicating, and an interviewer's job is not to let me know if I've communicated correctly. How do I address this?
* Take a beta blocker to help with anxiety during interviews.
* Do little/nothing about it but try to communicate your issue to the interview panel, "I'm here, I'm austic, and I hope that besides my unique conditions you consider me for this position and I aim to perserverere through this incident. I bring alot to the table".
* Additionally tell them what outside activities you're taking up to help with your conditions: team sports, clubs, counseling/therapy.
Edit:
* Try to get a Skype or remote interview first. Again, mention and sell your unique conditions -- but show them your performance from "home" where you're comfortable. Tell them should you get an onsite interview, you may perform differently/worse due to your conditions. But, eventually once acclimated should perform as well as your remote interview.
Help them to better understand you.