> I was in a years-long relationship with someone with BPD, and eventually what I realized is that time doesn't strengthen anything with them. Nothing builds up over time, there's no foundation being built, you are always one instant away from being nothing to them.
i’m sorry for your experience but this is also patently false applied as a general statement to “us”. you’re not helping the situation by putting all of us over “there” where there is always one instant away of you being nothing to us.
> i’m sorry for your experience but this is also patently false applied as a general statement to “us”. you’re not helping the situation by putting all of us over “there” where there is always one instant away of you being nothing to us.
All untreated BPDs experience splitting. For me, that isn't up for debate. By that, I mean you can't convince me otherwise. It's a hallmark of the disorder. Maybe you are receiving treatment and able to suppress it, but as soon as treatment no longer works for you or you discontinue it, you will start to split again.
> All untreated BPDs experience splitting. For me, that isn't up for debate
I don't know where you got that information from, but I'll assume it's the bad experiences you mentioned. I'm sorry you made them.
"a pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation" is one of nine criterias used to diagnose BPD. One must fulfil only five, however.
Please try not to make those generalizations. It's important. People suffering from borderline are still individual humans. Even if they have similar (not the same) problems as the ones who hurt you, it's not fair to divert your disappointment.
>People suffering from borderline are still individual humans.
Being the victim of childhood abuse or trauma does not give you the right to abuse people unrelated to those events today. You have agency, and you are responsible for your behavior.
Having a personality disorder does not give you license to abuse others and does not negate your responsibility for your behavior. Again, you have agency and your mental illness does not change that.
The fact that you did not choose to have BPD is irrelevant and does not give you the right to abuse others. It does not negate your responsibility for your own behavior.
i’m sorry for your experience but this is also patently false applied as a general statement to “us”. you’re not helping the situation by putting all of us over “there” where there is always one instant away of you being nothing to us.