Have you considered that he's drinking because it brings out the brother in you?
So you are essentially shouldering some/all of the responsibility for the brother's alcoholism upon the OP. That's a big burden to carry, and potentially dangerous + damaging if it is not true.
You're taking a wild guess with that comment, you have no idea, and (maybe unintentionally) your sentence doesn't ask if that could be the answer - you state it as the case (the words 'if' or 'maybe' would have been better here).
When people are looking for answers they can read into the linguistics of things very carefully. What you wrote was very powerful and without any facts or evidence to back it up.
I would be sad if the OP, who already clearly feels worried about the situation, started taking responsibility for this mess that actually wasn't his doing or responsibility.
I'd be even more sad if he gave up his startup and moved home when it turns out none of the trigger factors for the brothers alcoholism have anything to do with him. Many people just self-destruct and even if the alcoholic brother is missing his distant brother that doesn't make it wrong for distant brother to live abroad.
> So you are essentially shouldering some/all of the responsibility for the brother's alcoholism upon the OP. That's a big burden to carry, and potentially dangerous + damaging if it is not true.
No, I'm asking if he thinks that may be the case.
People do the weirdest things to get the attention of others, including getting in to trouble.
> I would be sad if the OP gave up his startup and moved home for this. Many people just self-destruct and even if the alcoholic brother is missing his distant brother that doesn't make it wrong for distant brother to live abroad.
It's not your life, it's his so there is noting for you to be sad about, whichever decision he makes, and whatever the outcome.
As for the linguistics, I'm not an English native speaker/writer but I though that it was pretty clear that I did not intend to suggest that he is at fault for his brothers drinking, that's a ridiculous suggestion to begin with. Everybody is responsible for their own lives.
Thanks for your concern. jacquesm's comment did make me pause and think, but I tend to not get carried away when thinking about taking responsibility. I have seen my dad take responsibility for a lot of his relatives' shortcomings all his life; all parties involved end up being miserable. So that history makes me a bit wary of compromising on my life for someone else.
But, I really do want to help my brother, which may involve some compromises.
So you are essentially shouldering some/all of the responsibility for the brother's alcoholism upon the OP. That's a big burden to carry, and potentially dangerous + damaging if it is not true.
You're taking a wild guess with that comment, you have no idea, and (maybe unintentionally) your sentence doesn't ask if that could be the answer - you state it as the case (the words 'if' or 'maybe' would have been better here).
When people are looking for answers they can read into the linguistics of things very carefully. What you wrote was very powerful and without any facts or evidence to back it up.
I would be sad if the OP, who already clearly feels worried about the situation, started taking responsibility for this mess that actually wasn't his doing or responsibility.
I'd be even more sad if he gave up his startup and moved home when it turns out none of the trigger factors for the brothers alcoholism have anything to do with him. Many people just self-destruct and even if the alcoholic brother is missing his distant brother that doesn't make it wrong for distant brother to live abroad.