I wish The Gulag Archipelago were search-able online somewhere. There is a chapter where Solzhenitsyn is describing the attitude of the various ethnic groups who occupy the same hell-hole prison that he is in. A prison where many were confronted with the choice between licking others plates and starving to death.
I can't remember if it was Croatians or whom, but he described a particular group as being the nicest, most generous bunch of men, despite the fact they were dying of hunger. He mentions that this one person would always address him by his full name (including the patronymic) with the intent to show respect and endearment.
I think this usage of a person's name embodies what Carnegie was trying to get across.
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If you have children, try addressing them by their full name. It's the closest thing to their actual personage that came come from your mouth, and it's a pleasure to take the extra time to utter it because you love them so much.
I think the key is not to try to figure out where to sprinkle someone's name into a sentence, but to figure out how to like them enough to want to use their name.
Not in Russia, where first/patronymic is a proper formal address. Just good manners. Very good manners under the circumstances.
I think this anecdote was in his short story, 'One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich' if I'm not mistaken? And I think the plate lickers were the first to die.
"Paclo raised his head. "Didn't they put you in the cooler, Ivan Denisovich? And are you still alive?" (They simply couldn't teach Western Ukrainians to change their ways. Even in camp they were polite to people and addressed them by their full name.)"
Kinda nice how google books enables a 'Good Will Hunting' moment without the genius, eh? :D
I can't remember if it was Croatians or whom, but he described a particular group as being the nicest, most generous bunch of men, despite the fact they were dying of hunger. He mentions that this one person would always address him by his full name (including the patronymic) with the intent to show respect and endearment.
I think this usage of a person's name embodies what Carnegie was trying to get across.
[edit]
If you have children, try addressing them by their full name. It's the closest thing to their actual personage that came come from your mouth, and it's a pleasure to take the extra time to utter it because you love them so much.
I think the key is not to try to figure out where to sprinkle someone's name into a sentence, but to figure out how to like them enough to want to use their name.
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