Seriously? That sounds like the perfect job for Common Lisp (which appears more or less set in stone in 2016, albeit without the usual concomitant stagnation, given its malleability).
Plus, in fact, I get the distinct impression that your second sentence describes what COBOL actually did for companies decades ago, so the first one makes it sound like a contradiction.
Plus, in fact, I get the distinct impression that your second sentence describes what COBOL actually did for companies decades ago, so the first one makes it sound like a contradiction.