I am an engineer as well, in western Europe with kids. But I regularly see people committing code at 9pm or commenting on docs at 11pm or see their testing traces (logs) at 1am and on weekends.
I can't compete with them in any way. "Don't work hard, work smarter" doesn't apply here, because I am surrounded by smart people, who also do smart work, when baseline is same, you just need to work more.
Guess who will be liked/praised more and have less chances to be laid off when conditions get worse?
I am lucky though, its not easy to fire people here, can't imagine what's happening in US
I have worked 10-12 hours a day throughout all of my working career (from 19yo onwards). This is in central Europe, and I'm not even the hardest worker around.
I also have hobbies and a social life - but it has consequences.
Family and children are entirely 100% impossible in this lifestyle without a stay-at-home partner. And unlike previous generations, stay-at-home partners are no longer a thing.
(Edit: to make it clear, I am not making a judgement, nor wishing for a stay-at-home partner - I'm entirely in favour of everyone making their own choices in life.
I am just pointing out that younger generations are now living in a totally different environment from previous generations, where a stay-at-home wife was the default. Which is yet another component in the birth rate equation.)
Props to you man, I have no kids and still barely manage to have hobbies and social life with just normal full-time hours. I do need a lot of time to sleep and simply rest and do nothing, so that is a factor.
Quick note: Guadeloupe[1] is not a country, it is part of France. Same for "La Réunion"[2] or even Saint-Pierre et Miquelon[3] (and probably others, I scrambled some dozens of times)
We work in the sleep efficiency space, so I've thought about this quite a bit.
My thinking, knowing the research around the area, but not having researched this specific case.
1) we are having children later in life. Evolution designed child rearing age to be 16-25. We have pushed that later and later as we've matured as a species, and in Australia (and Canada) from my experience we are now regularly in the 30+ for first children. I know of many mothers who's first child was born when they were 40 or later.
2) Sleep does not return to normal levels until the youngest child on average reaches 6 years old.
3) Our sleep naturally degrades as we age. Particularly in mid-30s. So if you have a child at 33, and you return to "normal sleep" at 39, you are expecting to return to your restful self, but your sleep has declined during that time.
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