The source of his confusion is believing that all observers must share a single reality. This is not the case: as an observer of event A=a, you only share the same reality as all other observers who also measure A=a (or anything downstream of A=a). If some observer comes along and measures A=b, they split away from your reality. Only the version of that observer that saw A=a stays with you.
There is no "remote synchronization" mechanism between observers. All observations are independent, and when an observation is made, the other outcomes are not discarded, they continue "running in parallel" until another observer comes along. That is to say, from the perspective of other observers, you and your measures are also an observation they have to make (and thereby collapse).
He didn't believe that all observers must share a single reality. He was confused because it was neither "one reality per observer", nor "one reality for all". The question he wanted to answer was: "What is it, then?"
I'm glad you were able to explain why one of the most preeminent theoretical physicists of all time was "confused". Thank you for your clearly well-founded and extremely confident explanation.
No, reality is not related to what we "focus" on. I don't subscribe to quantum observer anthropocentrism (which is also something that Wheeler fell prey to): an "observer" doesn't have to be conscious and doesn't have to be human. An observer is simply something in the universe whose state causally depends on some quantum phenomenon. For that thing to resolve its state, it needs to "measure" the outcome of the quantum phenomenon. That is all.
In this definition an "observer" is anything whose path depends on some perceived outcome (as in state of the universe), correct? So that could be human or a rock tumbling down a hill.
There is no "remote synchronization" mechanism between observers. All observations are independent, and when an observation is made, the other outcomes are not discarded, they continue "running in parallel" until another observer comes along. That is to say, from the perspective of other observers, you and your measures are also an observation they have to make (and thereby collapse).
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