FBI was literally sitting on Epstein files for years. They have chosen not to prosecute. When the state tried to investigate Epstein, FBI came in, took control over with claim they will share investigation results ... and then did nothing.
Yes, which happened only because a journalist broke a story about how FBI was not investigating Epstein for years and years. It was media who forced that to happen, after decades of abuse FBI was aware of.
Speaking of which, the previous conviction, the super sweet deal Acosta gave to Epstein before is also an example of elite unaccountability.
FBI and friends protected Epstein until it became impossible.
>There is some talk of eliminating the leap second
The concern, of course, is that some universes eliminating them while others don't can puts us out of sync. This creates a wobble that could potentially throw us out of Hilbert space.
$300 in groceries is worth the same whether it was paid for with cash or food stamps. But that doesn't mean the $300 in food stamps is worth $300 cash.
Banking Company LLC presents: Quantum Loans™
"Your money is simultaneously yours and ours until you check your balance."
Superposition Financing:
Your loan exists in all possible amounts until observed. Checking your balance collapses the wavefunction — so we recommend you simply... don't. Ignorance isn't just bliss, it's financially optimal.
Multiverse Co-signing:
Split the debt across all versions of yourself in the multiverse. Sure, some of you will default — but statistically, infinite yous means infinite revenue for us.
Entangled Interest Rates:
Your rate is entangled with a partner borrower chosen at random. If they pay on time, your rate drops.
Payment Clusters:
Forget monthly installments. Payments arrive in probabilistic clusters — sometimes three in a week, sometimes none for a year. We can't predict when, and neither can you. It's not a bug, it's quantum mechanics.
The real joke here is how close these quips are to the reality of modern day financial markets. Specifically, lending and hedging, are time entangled and value within the markets exist in superposition.
All of these have to be told light-hearted, as observational "jokes". Not like you are actually annoyed. You're just making light of a situation.
"I guess the bus is just never on time here, huh"
(Stuck in line at the grocers) "Friday evening rush-hour"
Same kind of thing with whatever you are observing, at the Doctor, in the gym, waiting for the light to turn, etc, etc.
It's all shit jokes if you can even call them that. But the purpose isn't to start a standup routine, it's to share a situation with a stranger and open up the floor to conversation. You are basically just indicating to a stranger: "Hey, I'm open for conversation", they can then choose to respond or just ignore the remark. Then you go from there.
While I agree with everything, I personally try to make my one liners positive instead of negative. On average it just opens an opportunity for a nicer conversation than another whine about politics, weather or public transit.
Exactly this - yesterday I was in line at the grocery store and the cashier and customer ahead of me were complaining about our long, frigid winter (not normal for this region) - I joked about how if the long-range forecasts were correct we will be up to +18c next Saturday and we all laughed about the launch straight from winter into "summer". And we all moved on - not everything has to be an in-depth conversation.
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