Ask HN: What are your biggest regrets? - gautamcgoel
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8bitsrule
Listening to the well-intended advice of (unqualified) adults who told me
there was little opportunity in pursuing the one subject I'd cared about all
of the time I was growing up. Instead, find the people who are already doing
it, wherever that takes you.

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CM30
Probably not networking or trying out different activities in university.
Basically just took on the classes and got my degree, and that was that.

Unfortunately, I realised afterwards that who you know is a lot more important
than what you know, as well as that university is one of the best times to
both meet interesting new people and get involved in new hobbies. Not knowing
anyone afterwards probably made it much more difficult to get my first job
afterwards, as well as to find startup cofounders and what not.

Also regret shutting down my first major internet community/forum site, since
it was pretty damn popular at the time (about 300,000 posts/a few thousand
users), and when merged with my later ones, could have become the base for a
much larger community.

Also regret not jumping on a few internet bandwagons/gold rush scenarios too.
Seeing how successful some channels became on YouTube/Twitch/whatever kinda
makes me wish I'd made the investment and gone all in on one of these
platforms back when they were starting out. Writing doesn't exactly pay
anymore, and those who made the transition to video earlier have sometimes
built entire careers out of it.

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cannaceo
Not getting divorced sooner. Too much misery for too long.

Not raising capital when it would've been easy.

Not understanding my customer despite having a #1 market position.

Not spending enough time with my daughter when she was younger.

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iracic
Hi, Can you share more details about #1 market position ?

~~~
cannaceo
Had the #1 selling product in the majority of the 450 doors I was in.
Customers always raved about our flavors which was a direct result of having
the strictest QC standards around our distillate manufacturing. We made sure
to distill our oils so that there were no residual terpenes that could
contribute to off flavors through oxidation. We were militant about it. Every
other brand sourced oil from the open market. A side effect of having the most
pure distillate oil is that it's also the most potent.

Listening to the customer feedback I never heard anyone compliment our
potency. Later on the hardware for vape carts evolved and new carts came out
that could provide higher doses. Our oil did not taste good in those carts so
we didn't make the switch. Then when the feedback started rolling in that our
cartridges weren't strong enough (they just didn't vaporize as much oil..) we
finally made the switch. By then we had lost our market position. Turns out
customers liked our flavor but the reason they were really purchasing was the
potency.

When you're on top you think it's your brand or your QC that's carrying
you...when really it was just a potency game all along.

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AnimalMuppet
Pouring into a side project time and attention that I should have given to my
kids.

~~~
quickthrower2
If the side project could bring in money maybe it’s too harsh to regret it. It
could have meant spending less time in a job and more time with the kids.

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toomuchtodo
I’ve only regretted what I’ve held back, never what I’ve done.

Be kind, but also be bold. Don’t live in fear, we’re all dead eventually.

~~~
girishso
What a lovely thought!

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roschdal
Spending too much time with computers.

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ScottFree
Not marrying my high school sweetheart and having kids right out of high
school. Now I'm 38, never married and it's increasingly unlikely I ever will.

~~~
catacombs
> Not marrying my high school sweetheart and having kids right out of high
> school.

You really dodged a bullet with this one. Kids right after high school? Not in
this day and age.

~~~
ScottFree
I wish people like you would stop spreading this fud.

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girishso
\- Took some big decisions purely based on emotions, not my brain.

\- Wasted a hell lot of time doing nothing meaningful.

\- Held back myself, when I should not have.

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caspercrf
In hindsight, concentrating on finding a side hustle or a business of my own
instead of just trying to be a better engineer. 90% of new ventures fail, but
everyone thinks they will be the exception. I was basically broke with no
savings and no job when I was 32. I'm 40 and bounced back a bit, but I feel so
behind in my career and saving for retirement.

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cm2012
Getting a dog. It's been two years now and she's a lovable dog but the reward
has not been worth the effort for me and I regret it.

~~~
gtirloni
You're probably overlooking something. These little creatures give us way more
than we give them <3

Is there any relative that could keep her?

~~~
cm2012
It's not that bad. Just like 5-10% less enjoyment of life? She loves me so
it's not worth making her unhappy for that.

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throwaway981211
Using personal time to work for my employer instead of investing it in myself.

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quickthrower2
Didn’t buy 1000btc @ $5 times. I’d have probably sold at $100 though!

~~~
Lordarminius
You still have an opportunity buy at $8.5K and sell at $85K

~~~
quickthrower2
I’ll buy at 85k and sell at 850k instead, thx.

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danbolt
Not transitioning into a non-binary gender in my teens and instead in my mid-
to-late-twenties where I am now.

I internalized a lot of rhetoric from other people that I simply had to accept
myself or feel comfortable with a narrative of being "natural". Ultimately,
after having a breakdown and taking effort to change my body/appearance did
that prescribed self-acceptance finally happen. It just didn't happen on other
people's terms.

The biggest takeaway I learned was not to lie to myself and not to accept
other people's convictions too much. It was a lesson in individualism and
boundaries.

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c0nducktr
All of the actions I didn't take.

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pkrotich
Not getting vasectomy sooner!

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chrisbennet
At 0x39 I regret:

\- I never had a honeymoon.

\- I said a hurtful thing to someone a decade ago (she lost a son and I said
something insensitive). The sort of thing you say when you don't have a good
"filter" between your brain and your mouth.

\- That back then, nobody told me I didn't have a good "filter".

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diehunde
Not studying enough to get tuition or to short the duration of college. Now I
have a substantial debt because it took me too long to finish.

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Blakestr
Spending time trying to convince investors of what I already know and just
building the damn thing without them.

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EvanAnderson
Not understanding time-value of money in my early 20's and paying-down low
interest debt instead of investing.

~~~
Rainymood
I'm in my early 20s now :) Do you have any concrete tips/things you wished you
did differently?

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EvanAnderson
Run numbers. Do simulations. Have a plan.

I concentrated too much on minimizing long-term interest expense. I didn't
think about how the money I was using to pay-down principal could have
returned income over the long term. The real estate asset I was paying on
hasn't appreciated at all in 20 years. I could have seen major investment
returns on that money which would far exceed the interest expense I
alleviated.

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non-entity
Not going to school, not doing anything for most of my late teenage years,
going into software engineering.

~~~
vastoi
What do you regret about software engineering?

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whiter0se
Wasting time on browsing Internet without purpose.

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dlphn___xyz
wasting years at an outsourcing firm

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redwoolf
Being born.

~~~
nvusuvu
It gets better, I promise. Hope you can find that help and healing.

