
When a co-founder dies - rriepe
http://blog.ivylees.com/when-a-co-founder-dies/
======
edw519
I am so sorry to hear about this. My condolences.

I went through the same thing. My co-founder was also in the "I'll give you a
kidney" category. OP is right; something like this really puts things into
perspective.

In my case, I decided not to continue for 2 reasons. First, there was too much
work for one person (there was too much work for 2 people). But more
importantly, I just didn't care anymore. I ended up taking a job and it was a
quite a while before the passion returned.

Respect to OP for making the decision to continue. Greg is with you, even if
in spirit only. Please succeed for those of us who didn't.

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mechanical_fish
My condolences for your loss.

Talk to those who will listen: to friends, to family, to a counselor, to folks
you meet at the electronics store. Do what you need to do for yourself, and
give yourself time; don't be surprised if it takes longer than you think.
Mourning cannot be pencilled into a time slot; it does not mesh with Google
Calendar. Don't worry about startups and hacking if you find, at times, that
the energy is not there; that energy will be back in its proper time.

\---

[Hackers: I see that mine is only the second comment. This is understandable,
even laudable in many circumstances: The convention on HN is to speak only if
you have something original to add.

That convention has its limits. There is nothing original to say when a friend
or colleague dies; nearly every writer in human history has had their shot at
the topic, as will most of us in our turn. But speak anyway. Use the standard
words. What's important in mourning is the act of speaking, not what you say.]

~~~
scott_s
The difficulty with conventional condolences is that they appear, to me,
hollow when I type them, even when I mean them. Without the ability to use the
sound of my voice or physical contact to convey sincerity, I'm at a loss.

With that said, I'm sorry.

~~~
noonespecial
Sometimes the only thing you can say is just that you have nothing to say, but
wish that you did.

------
cstross
(Please take my condolences as given.)

Meanwhile, on a discursive note, here's my cautionary start-up anecdote on
this subject ...

Some years ago, my wife was involved in a start-up -- a local microbrewery.
She was the trainee brewer; two experienced brewers, Ian and David, were the
muscle behind it. Ian and Karen worked back at the plant, pumping out beer:
David drove the van, making deliveries to local pubs, collecting debts,
keeping the business side running.

Now, microbreweries don't generally get VC backing. (They scale linearly with
labour inputs, rather than exponentially, and they're paid after the product
is drunk. It's a very 18th century business model.) In Fisherrow Brewery's
case, it did what most small Scottish businesses do: it relied on a
prearranged overdraft facility for its float (basically a line of credit from
the bank).

This worked fine, and the brewery was growing, getting ready to hire more
staff ... until David died. He was 40, he'd been working hundred hours weeks
for a year, and he had a stroke one night.

The business was dead in the water six weeks later. What killed it was _not_
Ian and Karen being unable to keep it going, but the bank; they called in the
overdraft. "Why?" Asked Ian. "Because our experience shows that when one of
the founders of a small business dies suddenly, 90% of the businesses go
bankrupt within six months," said the bank manager. "But we're viable!" He
protested. "Yes, but our statistics show that you're going to go bust, so
we're pulling your line of credit."

The banks are in the business of risk management, and they _know_ that when a
founder dies, the business is going down the shitter. And so they flush, hard,
to clear their own liabilities, even if it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

(Here's the icing on the cake: the overdraft was secured against assets that
David owned. To be precise, against shares in the bank in question valued at
rather more than the overdraft!)

------
TheThomas
Greg posted as 'pyroman' here on Hacker News. Many of the articles he
submitted were django / python / systems administration related that he had
published to his blog, codespatter.com.

<http://searchyc.com/pyroman>

------
anonforthis1233
Not wishing to be indelicate but ....

Another problem you might face is any relatives of Greg. With no corporates
structure - or even one that just says 50:50 you may see wives/parents/cousins
convinced that all startups are going to be ebay looking for their billions.
Remember the saying: you only choose a spouse - you don't get to choose their
family.

You may find you spend another few years working on your own to make this idea
a success and then lose it all to the legal fees defending against multiple
claims of who owns the other half.

It might be a good idea to make a break and restart the idea with just you.

~~~
_pius
_It might be a good idea to make a break and restart the idea with just you._

That's not ethical. Whatever equity Greg had belongs to his estate.

~~~
antirez
This is a very very hard problem. The fact is that in a startup you own 50%
because you are there working. Once one founder is no longer present it's very
hard to claim the 50% is still valid.

~~~
megaduck
It's hard, but necessary. My cofounder and I just hammered out our Operating
Agreement, which contains special language for _exactly_ this scenario. Amid
such tragedy, it's best to have the legal framework 'on rails' so that you
don't really have to think about it. Anybody dealing with the death of a
friend and business partner has enough on their plate already.

Here's our solution, in case other people are interested:

In event of the death of a member (we're an LLC), that member's economic
interests revert to their estate, but the inheritors lose all power to vote or
make decisions.

Within 180 days, the surviving member can elect to buy out the deceased
member's interest at a reasonable valuation. There's some legalese in
determining "reasonable valuation", but the upshot is that the surviving
members may take complete control of the company so long as the inheritors of
the deceased are properly compensated.

If a buyout doesn't occur, then the inheritors of the estate become silent
partners unless there's a mutual agreement to instate them as a full partner.

Despite what some people say, vesting is not always the answer. A lot of
vesting mechanisms leave the door open for somebody to get screwed out of
their rightful share. Personally, I'd rather see someone undeserving get
rewarded, rather than see a deserving person get shafted.

One more thing: To Rex (the OP), my sincerest condolences. Losing a business
partner is hard, losing a close friend is orders of magnitude harder. I think
I can speak for the whole HN community in saying that you have our sympathy
and understanding.

~~~
jfno67
First to Rex, my condolences.

I just wanted to add a suggestion over the reasonable evaluation and the
option to buy. In our startup, the company has taken life insurance on both
founders and half of the insurance amount almost match a valuation we as
founder agree on at the start of each year. This is mostly for the first
year(s) where the company is not getting that much revenues.

So what happens if one of us dies is that their family will get half of the
life insurance for their equity. The other half is to help the company cope
with the fact one of us is gone. This may sound expensive, but in fact for
guys in their thirties and in good shape it is quite cheap.

------
rufo
Several years ago, a close friend of our family died in a bicycle accident.

He had troubles throughout his life - he was a recovering alcoholic of several
years at that point, had been through a difficult divorce, was struggling to
pay his bills. (He was an excellent carpenter; we still have many improvements
on our family's house that he built through the years.) But he was very well
read, and had much life experience, and I can remember staying up late into
the night when I was in my very late teens; talking with him, and broadening
my perspective on life and everything else.

I wasn't so close with him that it had near the same effect, but I can recall
the feeling of loss I had when it finally sunk in that there would be no more
conversations late into the night in our living room, and imagining that
feeling multiplied by interacting with someone as closely as such a co-founder
is almost unbearable.

My condolences for your loss.

------
ttol
My condolences for your loss. It must be hard.

My partner and I recently thought about this scenario for us and decided that
one way to ensure business continuity is to have a key man insurance for each
other. We took out the policies a little while ago on top of other insurances.

------
dpcan
It's hard to be the first to say "I will go on" because there will be someone
who will say "how could you?"

When everyone comes together in a wake and pledges to go on AND to help each
other, then moving forward is a powerful, bonding, and relationship building
exercise that your lost friend would be proud of.

My condolences as well, you are a gifted blogger and I do hope you are able to
continue.

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chaostheory
Sorry for your loss... I'm glad it sounds like you're trudging on

It's rumored that this was something Gates and Co nearly had to deal with:

[http://www.pbs.org/cringely/pulpit/2006/pulpit_20060330_0008...](http://www.pbs.org/cringely/pulpit/2006/pulpit_20060330_000890.html)

It would be great if there was a fair way for all living parties to deal with
this issue.

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mahmud
May the man rest in peace and may you go forth and live your shared dream.
Amin.

------
n8agrin
My condolences as well. Untimely death is an incredibly hard thing to cope
with. Take the time you need and know that as you continue on your co-
founder's spirit lives on both in your friendship and in your work.

------
jyellin
“All good things must come to an end, but great things will live on forever,
only in a different form.” I am not sure what your belief system is, but I am
going to express mine because I am assuming, based on your post, that Greg is
an example of a ‘great thing.’ And although he will not be by your side in
physical form for those late nights, his legacy will live on forever. It is
important to realize that Greg would not want you to mourn and instead he
wants you to live, to live in a way that you have never lived before. Death is
obviously an inevitable occurrence in our lives, but it does not necessarily
need to result in feelings of angst because Greg served his purpose in the
world by becoming part of who you are today. He will forever be with you, like
all great things, only this time in a different form. Have the will to live,
have the will to thrive, and have the will to allow Greg’s legacy to continue
onward as your start-up becomes a huge success…

Good luck to you and may Greg rest in peace…

------
rokhayakebe
Sorry for your loss. I lost a close co-worker once and it was extremely
painful. Do not hesitate to cry if you want to. Laugh at some of your good
moments, jokes. Say something to him out loud if you want to "Hey Gregg, how
would you solve this problem?". I hope you continue with your project, I am
sure Gregg will support you along the way.

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conover
Greg, you will be missed. Rex, you must always press on.

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RiderOfGiraffes
It is said "You'll never get over it, you'll only get used to it."

You don't want to forget, and you shouldn't forget, someone as close as that.
You will, however, learn to go on. You'll become accustomed to having the
memories, you'll get used to it, and move forward.

Even though I don't know you - thank you for sharing, and my thoughts and best
wishes are with you.

------
francoisdevlin
Press on. Make him proud

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PStamatiou
My condolences. A good friend of mine died last month, he was 23 (finishing
his last year or so at Georgia Tech, computer science) and suffered a brain
aneurysm that ended up taking his life after two months of hospital time.

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fsniper
My condolences. Must be hard for you. Every line of code you write, every
business decision you make will remind you Greg from now on.

If I were you, I would name something on your business after him.

------
jhancock
Its probably too early to know if you really will continue on the existing
project. Take some time as you need and if your work still feels like the
right thing to do, continue. If over 6 to 12 months, its not working out,
don't push on for the sake of your partner's memory or because you said you
would in the first months.

I"m truly sorry for your loss. You do seem to be dealing with it as healthy as
possible at the moment.

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revorad
Sorry to hear that. I didn't know your friend, but reading your post I felt
the sorrow in my gut. I hope you will cope and help other friends and family
cope too.

Peace.

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grosales
My condolences. May Greg rest in peace and you find solace in the memories you
have of him.

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jacquesm
25 is just not fair. Kudos to you for keeping at it.

Condolences, now go and make him proud.

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adw
My condolences, and my thoughts are with you and yours.

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briteguy
Sorry to hear that. Hope you recover and carry on what your best friend has
left there. It is a heart-breaking period, but, you will be fine.

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briancooley
My condolences. I hope that, one day, when the pain has receded, your memories
of Greg will make you smile.

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gfodor
Condolences, thats just horrible.

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tectonic
I'm so sorry for your loss.

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_pius
My condolences.

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astine
!

My condolences.

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zackattack
that's awful man. i'm very sad for you. .i wish you the best

