
Ask HN: What helps you push through? - metah
When you are overworked, tired, have low motivation to continue and possibly on the brink of burnout.. what helps you drive what you&#x27;re working on to the finish line?
======
lcuff
Exercise. Enough sleep. Good food choices. Take care of the body first, then,
(for me) things that make me laugh in a wholesome way. Hugs from loved ones.
It's all counter-intuitive, because it's "taking the foot off the gas". The
drive to the finish line is fine if it's truly close, but you sound like
you're part of the legendary death march, which can go on for a loooong time.
We think for a living. Thinking works better in rested, relaxed bodies and
excited, curious minds.

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quickthrower2
Where I work we try not to work like that. We break up work into manageable
chunks. If someone is sick they take sick leave. If a project is too big for
two shoulders it has probably been broken up anyway. Treat work like it’s the
teams (although each item has one owner at a given time). Also avoid fake or
real deadlines, but do provide estimates. This all fits into knowing your
velocity and working standard hours such as 40h.

Outside of work, choose to relax, which might mean leaving a lot of stuff you
should do go. Maybe the house doesn’t need to be tidy, or the kids can watch
tv without you feeling guilty. Or use ubereats instead of cooking, or pause
the side project, skip the run etc.

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Arjuna
Gus Fring said it better than I ever will:

 _" What does a man do, Walter? [...] A man provides. And he does it, even
when he's not appreciated, or respected, or even loved. He simply bears up and
he does it, because he's a man."_

~~~
TbobbyZ
THIS. But it's important to emphasize that Gus was saying this in the context
of providing for ones family. There is no greater motivator...

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verganileonardo
Slowing down. Most things can wait another day, so I do my best to take the
time I need to relax and recover.

A stress-free, relaxed brain used for 6 hours is much better than stressful
brain used for 10h.

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helph67
Getting a good night's sleep is important, in many ways.

[https://digest.bps.org.uk/2019/11/21/a-lack-of-sleep-
causes-...](https://digest.bps.org.uk/2019/11/21/a-lack-of-sleep-causes-
anxiety-but-dont-worry-about-it/)
[https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/practical-
mindfulnes...](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/practical-
mindfulness/202007/one-word-protects-your-brain-diabetes-and-dementia)

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johnwheeler
Turning forty and having kids has been awesome. I spent the prior 20 years so
ambitious and so worried I wouldn’t make something of myself. I was always
reading books and watching YouTube videos on business,leadership, and self
improvement. Staying up all night coding.

I got pretty lucky and created a small business when I was 32. That business
is still alive today, but I don’t put anymore effort into it aside from doing
customer support. That’s probably a big part of why I feel like I can finally
sit back and enjoy my life and children. I’ve always had low expectations, and
I feel like I accomplished more than I thought I would. I haven’t made that
big of a dent, but it’s been enough for me.

I don’t know where I’m going with all this. I’m just glad I’m not constantly
thinking about success—it can be so draining. I used to be worried about
becoming who I am now, satisfied, somewhat complacent. It’s the happiest I’ve
ever been.

~~~
scarface74
I’m curious. What type of business is it?

~~~
johnwheeler
Saas for ebay sellers and feedback management

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sciencewolf
Surprisingly, it's the skill of doing less than I can. The act of holding back
has actually significantly boosted my focus. I write about it in
[https://algodaily.com/lessons/how-to-have-a-slow-and-
boring-...](https://algodaily.com/lessons/how-to-have-a-slow-and-boring-
successful-career?view=article), but purposely moving slower does the
following:

1\. It makes you focus on the task at hand, since you're no longer thinking
about another vector (speed)

2\. It guarantees that your daily energy reserves are enough to keep you
interested

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TbobbyZ
My wife and kids. I'm the sole breadwinner and want to give my kids a greater
life than I had. My dad was (still is) a deadbeat and didn't support me and my
siblings at all.

A routine also helps me stay driven and avoid burnout because I know what to
expect each day and there is a clear end in sight.

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logicslave
My family. I wanted to quit my job with nothing lined up, and even went so far
as putting my two weeks in. They told me to shut up and get back to work, and
in hind sight, its made all the difference in keeping me as a productive
member of society

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t0mmel
I would question why I was not planning to go somewhere else. If that’s how
you feel, then you should be changing direction. This might come off elitist,
or arrogant, but you have one life. One life to spend, not only for yourself,
but with the ones you love, and with the things you would like to deal with.
It shouldn’t be something that makes you feel miserable, if you have any kind
of choice.

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k00b
For me it's learning but mostly technical learning. This isn't the same for
everyone though. It took me a long time to stumble onto this.

Think about finding what motivates you like you think about finding the right
diet: experiment and iterate.

~~~
k00b
Also, Dr. Huberman of [http://hubermanlab.com/](http://hubermanlab.com/) has
been making the round on podcasts talking about the neuroscience of
motivation.

tl;dr We are motivated/rewarded (at the neurotransmitter level) when we feel
that we're on the right path. What makes you feel like you're on the right
path?

This feeling of being on the right path causes dopamine to be released which
quells the anxiety/quit sensation (adrenaline/norepinephrine) that's caused by
struggle and is what leads to burnout.

------
dave_sid
There’s got to be more to life than this. I know a lot of people will reply
with motivational techniques and philosophies, but being ‘on the brink of
burnout’ isn’t a thing that should be accepted as normal in our work lives.
Life is too short to live it like that.

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the_resistence
Step away and do something completely frivolous for a few hours. Usually a
pink panther film I have seen countless times or FPS going after zombies. I
need to access another part of the brain and "turn off" the area that has been
overworked. At least that is how it feels.

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muzani
I've done it before, the late nights, the 100 hour workweeks. It's difficult
to push yourself and it always take out a good chunk of you long term like
physical exertion would.

Learn to pull yourself, either with self-motivating goals or habits.

------
bingobongo1
You must find time to relax guilt-free.

Look into Shamatha meditation which is single-pointed concentration, it's
relaxing and good for your mental state.

------
kierank
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5JAHAFvcr2o](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5JAHAFvcr2o)

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john4532452
Reminding that everything is temporary

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shoo
to challenge the premise -- it is worth thinking this through: why is it
necessary to drive what you're working on over the finish line? if you reduced
your inputs of energy, time and caring to moderate levels that can be
sustained without negative physical or mental health impacts -- would you
personally receive comparable output?

re: burnout

> [...] level of caring couldn’t be sustained in the absence of results.

> My clients are perfectionists [...] They have very rigid ideals in terms of
> win-lose [...] Their expectations of success are through the roof, and when
> their reality doesn’t match up with their expectations, it leads to
> burnout—they leave no room for error or failure at all in their formula.

> Older workers, as it turns out, have more perspective and more experience;
> it’s the young idealists who go flying into a profession, plumped full of
> high hopes, and run full-speed into a wall. Maslach also found that married
> people burn out less often than single people, as long as their marriages
> are good, because they don’t depend as much on their jobs for fulfillment.
> And childless people, though unburdened by the daily strains of parenting,
> tend to burn out far more than people with kids. (This, too, has been found
> across cultures; in the Netherlands, a recent survey by the Bureau of
> Statistics showed that twice as many working women without children showed
> symptoms of burnout as did working women with underage children.) It’s much
> easier to disproportionately invest emotional and physical capital in the
> office if you have nowhere else to put it. And the office seldom loves you
> back.

\--
[https://nymag.com/news/features/24757/](https://nymag.com/news/features/24757/)

re: not burning out

> Poor is the person without Slack. Lack of Slack compounds and traps. Slack
> means margin for error. You can relax. Slack allows pursuing opportunities.
> You can explore. You can trade. Slack prevents desperation. You can avoid
> bad trades and wait for better spots. You can be efficient. Slack permits
> planning for the long term. You can invest. Slack enables doing things for
> your own amusement. You can play games. You can have fun. Slack enables
> doing the right thing. Stand by your friends. Reward the worthy. Punish the
> wicked. You can have a code. Slack presents things as they are without
> concern for how things look or what others think. You can be honest. You can
> do some of these things, and choose not to do others. Because you don’t have
> to.

> Most times are ordinary. Make an ordinary effort.

> Make sure that under normal conditions you have Slack. Value it. Guard it.
> Spend it only when Worth It. If you lose it, fight to get it back. [...]
> Make sure to run a diagnostic test every so often to make sure you’re not
> running dangerously low, and to engineer your situation to force yourself to
> have Slack.

\--
[https://thezvi.wordpress.com/2017/09/30/slack/](https://thezvi.wordpress.com/2017/09/30/slack/)

