
I accepted a 6 figure salary at 23 and quit 6 months later. Here’s why - sidhanthp
https://www.rianasingh.com/boss/2019/10/6/myuberstory
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x2f10
>I started not to take myself seriously after a few encounters of getting
manterrupted, mansplained, hepeated, and other things that slowly led to that
internal feeling of defeat.

I wish people would leave these terms out. It takes me from an emphatic reader
to a reader who is suspicious about a hidden agenda. "I was interrupted and
patronized" suffices.

~~~
lukev
While I understand being annoyed at these neologisms, they do add information:
the writer didn't just didn't just feel interrupted and patronized, she felt
interrupted and patronized in ways that fit into specific patterns of gendered
behavior.

That is highly salient to her experience.

~~~
huntleydavis
To be fair, the way that people in technical roles explain things to those
with less technical knowledge can often feel condescending and 'mansplained'
regardless of the gender roles in conversation. I ( male ) felt this in my
first job out of college from everyone that was senior to me on the
engineering team. When I was there, I worked with a girl that was both younger
than I and more senior in many areas technically. She, albeit I think
unintentionally, would effectively mansplain issues to me.

Point being, in technical roles and roles where you interact with technical
people, you will undoubtedly have moments where you feel like information is
being disseminated in a condescending fashion. Context is key here as it would
be unfair to conflate the general 'prickliness' of many engineers with
misogyny.

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grawprog
I have trouble understanding what that was really about. It seemed like she
just didn't like the job because she didn't have a clear idea of what she was
supposed to do and didn't feel important enough.

This part stood out to me a bit

>due to the fact that I had less technical experience, it was hard for me to
garner the confidence to ask questions.

When I feel like I don't know what I'm doing, that's when I ask the most
questions and I sit there and let whoever I'm asking mansplain the hell out of
it to me.

From what I could tell, she didn't like the lack of direction from her
managers, but also didn't like having things explained to her. She wanted
constant feedback about what she was supposed to be doing, yet wouldn't ask
questions and didn't like to have things explained to her. How do you
accommodate someone like that? It's too bad her job didn't work out, but it
sounds more like, she didn't like her job and the way the company was run.

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oldmanthrowit
Uh, so what, this is tech.

I started making 6 figures a few weeks after my 18th birthday, over 20 years
ago. I've worked with hundreds, if not thousands of people in their teens, or
under 23, who made 6 figures. That's the industry, it's not even worth
mentioning.

These posts are always just lame humble brags with a contrite anecdote or two
and a weak inspirational ending. _yawn_.

~~~
dehrmann
Right now, yes, and in the dot com bubble, yes, but from 2002 until probably
2010, six-figure entry-level salaries weren't so common.

But I agree that for the last ~7 years, making six figures in tech hasn't been
anything notable.

~~~
oldmanthrowit
Looking at my records, around February 1994 was when I hit $100k, and I'm
really a medicore engineer.

This formulaic post is just sad. It's almost as bad as reading Oleg's posts on
LinkedIN. I hired a FELON!

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tanseydavid
Asks for advice from a "leader" (recommended by another trusted individual) --
then gets very upset when leader gives the advice requested.

This is very confusing to me. Why ask in the first place?

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Accujack
Well, I can tell this was written by a young person and someone in California.
Nothing wrong with that, it's just that she has a lot of expectations that are
going to be really hard for any company to meet.

It's awesome if you happen to get hired by a great company that walks the
walk, but for the most part the things students/graduates get sold on as
"normal" for white collar employment don't happen, or only happen in certain
circumstances in a limited way. Examples:

>Flag 1: I did not have a thorough understanding of the role, and I don’t
think management did either.

Not even unusual. Sometimes all a company knows (especially a small company)
is that they need something done and need a person to do it. These are
actually great opportunities if you know the work... it's a chance to write
your own ticket. If you expect everything to be laid out for you when you're
hired, you're not going to grow much or get paid the way you want.

>Flag 4: Push your manager to provide a clear description and/or breakdown of
your role. You should know what you own, what your day to day or week to week
looks like, and how with your position you will add value to the team that
ideally aligns with a larger team goal or mission.

Wow. I think in my whole career I've had only 1-2 managers who could tell you
in full how my role "aligns with a larger team goal or mission". Most of the
time it's just "Our business runs on computers, and you know how they work".
It's great if you have a visionary boss, but most people don't. If when you're
hired your manager can tell you exactly what you're going to be doing and what
success looks like, you've gotten an easy job... that again won't pay as much
as you want nor help you to grow.

Uncertainty is normal.

>Flag 5: I didn’t have an ally or sponsor in the workplace. This stemmed from
me not feeling like there was someone that I could reach out to, and not
feeling comfortable in the work environment.

Most workplaces you don't have someone to hold your hand except maybe your
boss or (if you're an intern or trainee) your mentor. That's not a _normal_
thing to have, your employer is running a business, not an adult daycare. If
you want support, join a women in business org or a fraternal organization.

>Flag 6:A good manager will work with you to identify your strengths, and
provide you work opportunities to learn the skills that will allow you to
advance in your career, and help you take it in the direction you want.

...and the other 90% of managers are doing well if they get all the work done
on time and under budget and don't accidentally murder or grope their
employees.

I'm sure the business environment is different in Cali, especially in the
valley, but the author's expectations are rather high here.

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JPLeRouzic
There is something beautiful in this story. Please read it.

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edsammy
Always cool to hear these stories! Thanks for sharing :D

