
You should've asked - nevatiaritika
https://english.emmaclit.com/2017/05/20/you-shouldve-asked/
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metaphorm
this doesn't seem insightful to me at all. there's thousands of years worth of
culture attesting to the fact that men and women tend to (with exceptions)
have different communication styles. men are much more explicit and women are
much more implicit.

"you should have asked" is natural for a man and egregious to a woman who will
naturally tend towards "you should have known". that's not to say there are no
exceptions. the world is 7.5 billion exceptions, but if we're going to be
speaking in generalizations (as the essay is wont to do) then let's do that.

this essay highlights only failures of men to communicate with women in the
female style w.r.t to domestic tasks. what about the failures of women to
communicate with men in the male style in other domains? these are all causes
of conflict in relationships and addressing only one side of a conflict is not
how to resolve a conflict. good relationships establish communication by both
partners based on their natural communication tendencies. a man will learn to
be more intuitive and a woman will learn to be more direct.

the essay begins by making some fairly trivial observations about
communication and then it goes totally off the rails with ideology about
"mental load". Every single person in the entire world has a mind full of
minutia, anxieties, and distractions. Everyone. If you don't, you're the
Buddha. "Mental Load" is not a female or male phenomenon.

And then even more ideology about how the media portrays men as "adventuring
heroes" or somesuch. really? what media is this? I've become accustomed to
seeing men portrayed as hapless fools, wage-slaves, and of course angry and
dangerous brutes.

honestly I'm just not sure what I'm looking at here. this is the kind of rant
that if the gender roles were reversed would be considered totally
unacceptable as chauvinist pig shitlord propaganda. can you imagine such a
thing? an essay written by a man about how annoying women are and how they
just don't "get" us?

this is the world in 2017. there is still substantial injustice committed
against women (and against men too) but the discourse is rancid and encourages
intractable bickering and ideological warfare.

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ztratar
Am a guy. Also have this exact mental load thing in my head 80% of the day.

I can see how it could be more common for women, but I think it's also a
misinterpretation and simplification of how men think as well.

~~~
ztratar
continued reading more.

Agreed that it's a societal thing that's there from the upbringing and most
men don't do enough to understand it.

~~~
kwoff
How many fingers is Big Sister holding up?

