
Ask HN: Does your significant other share your passion for tech/rationality? - OldJohnLemon
If not, how has that impacted your life?<p>Personally, I seem to be forever caught between the two sides of the coin:
1) It&#x27;s tragic because it feels like we&#x27;re not on this adventure together
2) It&#x27;s great because it grounds me and keeps me from burning out<p>Curious to hear some opinions on that!
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giantg2
Assuming you're a man, my experience is that most women I have met lack either
rationality or reasonableness, at least in one area of life or another. This
may also be true for men, but I don't see it as commonly.

For example, my wife had never bought alcohol until last month. It has always
been provided free via guys (me for the last few years) or her mom buying it
for her. It's rational for her to expect that she would never have to buy
alcohol since it has always been provided to her, but it's not reasonable to
assume that will always be the case. So she had no idea how to buy alcohol. In
my state liquor is only available at separate stores. She went to the wrong
store. Then when she finally got to the right store, she bought really
expensive stuff (could have bought 4x more of decent stuff for the price). She
buys brand named food too on the one or two times she's gone shopping even
when there's no taste difference or ingredient difference. She just doesn't
have common sense.

I'm not sure how a lack of rationality in your partner would ground you, but I
completely sympathize with the feeling of being alone on your adventure in
life. I might even expand it to not just being alone, but having to carry
someone with you.

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RemingtonLak
Not sure if I understand your tech -> rationality correctly but my experience
so far... no.

Almost "sexist", my wife see tech as a "man" thing much as being a handy man
etc. So whenever a tech situation arises, its like teaching your grandmother
how to do a swipe a smartphone screen. sadly.

Worse, she's in a high tech (sw based) Co and working harder than ever as
"remote." I'm trying to encourage her to help me seek out an adventure in
being financially self reliant but she won't have it. Wants me to do it all by
myself. Unfortunately for me, hard to be self motivated when the soul person
in your life doesn't want to be part of the same future. (venting here. sorry)

~~~
giantg2
Anyone who is single should read this as advice and a warning to you.

Almost the exact same here. My wife has trouble with technology. Luckily her
job is not tech related.

On an hourly basis, she makes more than me but only works part time. She
watches the kid during my workday, then I watch the kid on the evenings and
weekends while she works or does hobbies. She does not contribute to our bills
but spends her money on hobbies like horse related stuff. She spends more on
her hobbies every month than I do on the mortgage. I had to give up many of my
hobbies to support us, like the Camaro that I used to do track days with.

I do all the cooking, baking, shopping, handyman work, mechanic work,
yardwork, etc. She does most of the laundry, vacuuming, and dishes.

She also refuses to move to a lower cost area. I hate my job, so lower
expenses could help me retire earlier or find a lower paying job. We both want
land, especially for her horse. We could afford land if we moved.

