

To Find Happiness, Forget About Passion - itg
http://blogs.hbr.org/cs/2012/01/to_find_happiness_forget_about.html

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asolove
I strongly disagree. "Big problems" are the same as a misplaced "passion." To
find happiness, learn what passion actually is. It's different from
"interest."

In my own life and many of my friends', "passion" is often mistakenly replaced
by "important, abstract idea that sounds good." As in "I am passionate about
saving the environment." Of course the environment is important, and having an
interest in it is one thing, but this is not the same as actually being called
to work day-to-day on this issue.

The decision you should actually make is something like: I enjoy making sense
of large, ugly datasets. Or, I like cold-calling businesses and convincing
them of the value of something they would never think of. If you enjoy that
day-to-day work, then sure, go ahead and use it for the environment. But don't
get a degree and a job in "environmental studies" just because the issue is
interesting.

A "passion" is the thing you do even when you're tired or sick, and practice
even when you have better things to do. You don't always enjoy it, but you do
it anyway. You would be happy working another job in order to keep doing it.

For many of us who found programming, the discipline and long hours of
humiliating bug-hunting have taught us what "passion" really is. But many
people never have the chance to do that. High school classes, college clubs,
and even most Millennial-oriented "save the world" jobs are generally more
about "interests," things that are impressive-sounding and interesting in the
abstract, rather than "passions," gut-wrenchingly difficult disciplines that
demand our attention each moment.

~~~
dhruval
Need to take it a few steps further.

Happiness isn't about passion. Or interest. Or possessing something. Or
accomplishing stuff.

Happiness is by definition a subjective state of mind. It can be easily
manipulated.

Consider for instance someone riding on a bus on a normal day who gets a phone
call telling her that she has won a $70 million dollar lottery. This
individual proceeds to become ecstatically happy, even though nothing has been
gained or lost in that moment. 5 minutes later she finds out that this is just
a crank call, now her level of happiness will be lower than it was before she
got the fake news. Even though nothing has changed objectively.

In the real world people generally accept that a rockstar, with many things
going for him socioeconomically, can be depressed to the point of committing
suicide. But don't seem to take seriously the notion that there are people who
are incredibly happy but don't really have a lot going for them in socio-
economic terms.

On the balance, the meme that there is some sort of objective circumstance
that can lead to satisfaction and happiness is required for civilization to
progress.

The article itself is poorly written, but links to a very good Ted talk on the
issue...
[http://www.ted.com/talks/dan_gilbert_asks_why_are_we_happy.h...](http://www.ted.com/talks/dan_gilbert_asks_why_are_we_happy.html)

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crazygringo
To me, being "passionate" about things seems like a very American thing (USA),
or at least the extent to which it's encouraged.

I'm not sure that "passion" is usually a healthy thing at all. It's good to
_like_ things (playing the piano, going out with friends, writing novels,
coding, etc.), and it's good to arrange your life in a way that you have the
resources to do what you like.

But when I hear the word "passion" I think of CEO's who neglect their wives
and families because they're passionate about their company, or of 35-year-old
painters who realize they need to forgo ever having a family they can support
because of their passion for painting, or musicians who write things only they
themselves like, because of their passion for being authentic and non-
commercial. Basically "passion" seems like unhealthy navel-gazing which is the
antithesis of a healthy balance of things in your life.

And I think I'm at least somewhat justified in saying this, because passion
comes from romantic passion, which is by definition a short period of time
when you _are_ infatuated by somebody else, usually to the detriment of other
things in your life (friends, hobbies, etc.). There's a reason it's called
"love sickness".

So maybe it's a semantic thing, that people now say "passion" when they
actually just mean "things they like" -- but which cheapens the real meaning
of "passion", because then how do you express that? And if people seriously
encourage people to be truly passionate about things, I think that can be very
unhealthy, and lead to a great deal of unhappiness.

~~~
FreakLegion
Passion comes from the Latin deponent verb _patior_ : to suffer, undergo,
endure. (Whence the phrase 'Passion of Christ,' which doesn't mean 'Jesus was
passionate about stuff.')

Anyway, there are a whole host of value assumptions built into that "healthy"
word you're waving around. If I'm passionate about painting and don't care
about having a family, then I'm going to paint. I'm not obligated to have a
family just because it's a social norm.

~~~
dextorious
""" If I'm passionate about painting and don't care about having a family,
then I'm going to paint. I'm not obligated to have a family just because it's
a social norm."""

And this attitude is exactly what the parent commenter was ranting about.

Especially if you DO have a family, and it's more like "I don't have to care
for my family over my business just because it's a social norm".

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bitwize
Life is hard. The generation before mine still remembers a time when in some
parts of the USA, it took year-round back-breaking labor just to eke out a
living. There was no asking them what they wanted to do. There was no telling
them to follow their agricultural passions. Everybody was expected to do their
share to ensure that the family didn't freeze or starve.

This is what life was like for all but the very wealthy for thousands of
years.

How fortunate are we to live in this time when this is no longer necessarily
true in the developed world. When things get tough and your basketweaving
Ph.D. no longer opens doors for you, that's not betrayal. It's not a reason to
Occupy anyplace. It's the default state of things. So sod your passions, your
aspirations, your pie-in-the-sky dreams. Do what needs to be done. Wash
dishes. Scrub floors. Stack boxes. Whatever.

~~~
hackinthebochs
This is exactly how I feel every time I read someone say "screw money, do what
you love". How fortunate we live in a time where "do what you love" isn't a
nonsensical statement! Invariably that statement comes from those who just
happen to be passionate about a field that is lucrative at the moment. When
the art major who busses tables to make ends meet years after graduation can
say that, then I'll give it some weight.

The idea that somehow making a living from anything less than your "passion"
is doing it wrong is just ridiculous. Sometimes your passion for basketweaving
isn't what's going to put food on your family's table. Maybe you don't have a
passion for engineering, but if you're capable at it, maybe you should
consider that rather than living a life of passion out of your car.

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richardburton
I think it is important to realise the difference between finding something
you love and finding something that will benefit you economically. When those
two things overlap it can be amazing! When they do not it can be hard. When
you have nothing to be passionate about it is sad. For example:

\- I _love_ kitesurfing. Since 13 I have been insanely passionate about it.
Right now I am sat in a hostel in Cape Town coding away just giddy with the
excitement about the waves and wind that are coming in tomorrow. I am hoping
to get another jump this big tomorrow:
<http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BVDgV7cbNjU>. However, _no one is going to pay
me to kitesurf_. Even the best guys in the world do not make much money at
all. I am always going to lose money kiting. I love it; but I cannot make
enough money from it to have a family and give them the life my father gave
me. Therefore trying to pursue kitesurfing as a means to happiness and
economic stability would be a _terrible_ idea.

\- I _love_ the internet. I love the apps, sites, hacks, businesses,
connections, possibilities and promises of the internet. The economies of the
world love the internet. That is a great overlap. I can always make money by
coding no matter how bad things get. And I will enjoy it. I may find the
clients tedious or the projects dull but I enjoy the process of writing code.
It is fun and although I am not very good; it fulfils me intellectually,
economically, and professionally.

\- I _love_ making stuff happen. The satisfaction I got from running my last
business and see all my competitors copy my model was amazing. I loved
managing my staff and reading happy customers' emails and everything that
involved improving our software. These are things that I am deeply passionate
about and are extremely economically valuable. I have found happiness through
my passion for business.

Think of it like a ven diagram. If passion and economic potential overlap -
happy days.

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forgottenpaswrd
Dualist mindset.

If you go to solve real problems you have to forget your passion. This is
typical western dualist mindset, choose one or the other, black or white.

The best you could do is to solve real problems AND be passionate about it. In
my experience, it is not that difficult if you study yourself: know thyself.

If you are highly introvert, you better not work organizing parties, or an
extrovert expend his life in front of the computer coding is not good, if you
like to organize things you working on an ever changing work is going to crush
you deep inside.

Common sense, but I see everyday people working against their self, and making
their life and that of the people that surround them miserable.

It is also highly typical that people choose as jobs what takes more effort
from them(they value what they are bad at). I had a friend that was very good
drawing but decided to work on things that he was very bad at. I convinced him
to start using their skills in a new job and he could not believe you could
get paid for something as "easy"(easy for him, I don't know anyone else that
could do what he does)

~~~
sn0wBuM
Yup, I agree. Why not both?

Sounds like the right thing is to find a big problem that you can be
passionate about.

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vishvananda
This post seems to be missing the point. There is a general misunderstanding
that being happy and excited about what you are doing has to do with the
activity itself. It has a lot more to do with meeting internal needs.

I've had a pretty wide variety jobs in my life: meditation teacher, chef,
poker player, software engineer. I experienced passion and happiness in all of
them.

Initially, this seemed to be by chance, but eventually I spent some time
trying to identify what made me happy. I discovered my driving needs: the
things that inspire me and bring me the most happiness.

Driving needs are unique: everyone needs different things to be satisfied and
fulfilled. For some it is acknowledgement and respect, for others it is the
thrill of challenge and overcoming obstacles, and for still others it is
security and stability.

It is extremely valuable to understand what your individual needs are. If you
are clear about them, you can find ways to fulfill those needs in many
different professions. You are free to find the optimal "work" to fulfill
those needs.

Someone who is fulfilled by challenges is not likely to be fulfilled working a
9-5 job, just like someone who needs security is not going to be fulfilled
working at a startup. It isn't the 9-5 job or the startup that is making the
person happy, it is the fact that their needs are getting met.

A clear understanding of your driving needs gives you the opportunity to meet
them in whatever situation you find yourself in. Additionally, it gives you
the flexibility to change your profession if circumstances dictate without
sacrificing your happiness.

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j_baker
At the same time, I'd prefer our generation to be raised to follow our passion
to what the previous generation was taught: get a 9 to 5 job where you'll be
miserable but make a ton of money and live a nice, safe, and boring life with
your 2.5 children.

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msb
I hardly think that because one friends passion turned into a career that
wasn't recession proof constitutes enough evidence to say we should give up on
following our dreams. I know plenty of people who pursued the 'big problem'
and have had successful careers, yet remain unfulfilled because they don't
have a passion for their work.

I like the idea of finding the problems to solve, but I don't think this has
to mean we leave our true passions behind. Life is short, pursue your passion.
When you hit a wall use the knowledge and experience you have gained to solve
problems within the field you are passionate about.

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akeck
If Oliver wants to understand happiness, I think he should consider why his
friend was extremely happy during her PhD. That she was unhappy later when she
couldn't find work does not make her a counter example to following one's
passion. When your needs aren't met, you can get unhappy. In my experience,
happiness comes from your relationship to the present. Follow your passion or
work on a "big problem" or work everyday at a job. All can make you happy or
unhappy. Being happy lies in how you live your experiences while following
your passion or working on a big problem or doing whatever it is that you do.
How do you react to trouble? How do you handle success and praise? How do you
go about doing what you do? Do you help people? Do you compete? Are you
satisfying your basic needs? From what I can tell, barring the effects of
illnesses like depression, happiness lies in how you choose to go about your
life and how you handle its ups and downs. Unfortunately, I haven't yet
figured out the nuances of the above questions and others like them, so I
don't know which answers result in happiness, but that's life, I guess. Some
random things I've read on the topic: <http://goo.gl/xxvkl>
<http://goo.gl/fKYlM>

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shad0wfax
The premise of the author is the separation of economical benefits from what
you are passionate about. Sure, if you are making money (more than just making
ends meet) by doing what you love, you can have your cake and eat it too.

The simple truth is do you want to enjoy the journey following your passion,
knowing very well there is a slim* chance of financial success or do you want
to find a comfort zone and derive "borrowed" happiness. The borrowed happiness
is from all materialistic things, safety, comfort, peace etc.. that you can
afford/buy.

-*I am sure there are people who have passions that also have tangible financial success guaranteed. Good for them!

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krigath
"It's about what you can do and how you can be a valuable contributor."
Certainly.

"Look into problems that affect you in a very personal way." This sounds very
much like things you are likely to be passionate about, and the title is
therefore quite misleading.

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yason
Passion is a fire that is in your heart and that will forever try to get you
do something you must do. Passion makes you alive—otherwise you'll spend
decades withering away. Passion is never an idea, it's always something that
you actually do. Passion is orthogonal to happiness, happiness may or may not
come with or without passion.

Interestingly, _From The Collaborative International Dictionary of English
v.0.48 [gcide]:_

    
    
      Passion \Pas"sion\, v. i.
         To suffer pain or sorrow; to experience a passion; to be
         extremely agitated. [Obs.] "Dumbly she passions, frantically
         she doteth." --Shak.
         [1913 Webster]

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olaf
Just a coincidence, yesterday on Twitter: "If you want to be happy, practice
compassion." ~Dalai Lama

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loceng
Get happiness from the people you find who support you with your passion.

