
How to get meetings with people too busy to see you - ibrahimcesar
http://steveblank.com/2013/08/12/how-to-get-meetings-with-people-too-busy-to-see-you/
======
edw519
For my inbox:

Turn-offs:

    
    
      - obviously sent to many others
      - obviously boilerplate
      - buzzwordy
      - uses the word "coffee"
      - no apparent direction or desired outcome
      - previously insulted me on-line
    

Turn-ons:

    
    
      - already know them
      - already respect them
      - referred by someone I know or respect
      - mentions something I said or wrote
      - kind words without sounding contrived
      - mentions something I'm irresistably curious about
      and most importantly:
      - builds or expands upon something I said, wrote, or am passionate about

~~~
DannyBee
Listen asshole,

Can we meet for coffee next week?

I'd like to discuss our shared synergies around online advertising. I believe
you could be a huge value-add to our preliminary discussions.

~~~
pm
Upvoted for beating me to the punch, and I'm leaving a reply before someone
unrelated to the intended recipient doesn't get the humour and takes offence
to your strong wording.

------
Peroni
What's in it for me?

Answer that question for the person you are selling to, pitching to,
requesting a meeting with, etc and your chances of success increase
dramatically.

This isn't new wisdom, it's arguably one of the oldest tenets of sales.
Humans, by nature, are selfish beings. The majority expect a return for any
effort put in on their behalf.

~~~
fsckin
This is where 'social engineering' comes in super duper handy. 'Interview'
them for a 'publication' and pepper them with fluff as well as the questions
you really want to ask.

~~~
liotier
Most people with a few year's experience have long been inoculated against
that - usually after having given a couple of pseudo-interviews and later
understanding they have been played like a banjo...

------
jseliger
_But who is offering to teach me something I don’t know._

If I had to guess, I would also say that Blank does something like what I
learned to do: look for people who are already proactively engaged in
something. I wrote a similar essay called "How to get your professors'
attention, along with coaching and mentoring"
([http://jseliger.wordpress.com/2010/10/02/how-to-get-your-
pro...](http://jseliger.wordpress.com/2010/10/02/how-to-get-your-
professors%E2%80%99-attention-or-how-to-get-the-coaching-and-mentorship-you-
need/)) that described how I began to filter requests by looking at whether
the people making the request had some skin in the game, or have done
something to show investment and the ability to be helped.

Most people appear to learn how to do this through trial and error, but it's
also useful to codify them.

------
apunic
Not too bad advice but the key lies somewhere else:

0\. Stop chasing the one investor or selected perceived important people but
rather get a sense who might be important

1\. First and most important: ACHIEVE something, create something unique,
build strong traction, DO something where others raise their eyebrows, get
people impressed, everyone!

2\. This is now what most people don't get: you do not network by just going
to networking events or by mingling with other people, no: your achievements
will be your networking vehicle -- you network by achieving stuff -- you don't
have t ask for meetings anymore, people will approach you. Or you have just to
talk about your achievements (to everyone) and the rest comes by itself. And
when you want ask for a meeting, don't -- just tell your achievements and the
other party will ask to grab a coffee together. So, create or work towards a
situation where others approach you some day. Really, the key is to work on
achievements and nothing else.

It's definitely not enough to tell the other party "in exchange [...] what we
learned about" this and that, you have to achieve something, tell them where
you succeeded! They don't want another boring conversation with a flimsy
excuse. Imagine some developer who wants to work for your startup and
approaches you and tells you about what he learned about some random technical
topic -- this would lead to an awkward situation where you just want to escape
the conversation with a needy guy. Instead imagine the same guy telling you
that he build the first Sinatra-like framework for Openresty/Lua that blows Go
and the JVM together and he would love to show it to you since you need some
high performance web framework devs. Big difference.

Sidenote: everybody is important and will bring you one step further on your
journey, not only VCs or angels. Most underrated target: other entrepreneurs,
in particular those which are on the same level like you or a bit ahead
because they are most willing to share thoughts or meet up and because they
are your real peers (this is what I totally missed when I started).

------
osetinsky
As odd as it may sound, we think this process should work much like online
dating: what can you say to pique a stranger's interest and encourage them to
meet with you?

We're borrowing from online dating to create a community of professionals open
to receiving coffee meeting requests. No one is guaranteeing that they'll meet
with other members who reach out to them, or that they'll even respond. But by
joining, everyone implicitly communicates an openness to at least receiving
meeting requests from people outside their network. This is already proving
powerful:

www.treatin.gs

------
tomrod
There is a bit of irony here in that the advice article on how to get people's
attention waits until 2/3 into the article to practice their own advice of
_teaching us something we don't know._

I don't know Steve Blank; are all his articles like this?

~~~
larrys
I worked with Steve in the 90's. Can't comment on the rest of his articles but
you have a good point.

Not whether it is relevant in this particular case or not (people will most
likely read the entire piece because it's short and it's by Steve Blank) but
as a general rule in any writing such as this you have to draw people in, make
them curious, and make them want to read the entire piece you have written.

You can't rely that without the correct first paragraph or sentence that they
won't bail on you before you get to your conclusion or are able to make your
point. I guess a good headline might also take care of this. "How to get
meetings" is just a so so headline. It's like "how to make more money from
your clients". Sounds bland.

Personally as far as this statement which Steve made:

"“I’d like to have coffee to bounce an idea off of you and in exchange I’ll
tell you all about what we learned about xx.”"

I would have flipped and restated "I'd like to tell you what we learned about
xx if I can have a small amount of your time to get your thoughts on yy".

In other words leading with the benefit at the start of the sentence. Saying
"I'd like to have coffee" as the first part of the sentence might act like a
trigger that makes the person not even read the rest of the sentence or the
email. You have to grab people's attention when you have it.

~~~
tomrod
Thanks for your response!

I agree with your point, and see why one would want a hook to draw people in.

To me, this begs the question as to whether we should focus on adding so much
content to make a blog post when a twitter-length blurb followed by short
anecdote or commentary would be sufficient.

------
hawkharris
I thought Steve's post was insightful and well written. The article would be
even better if the author made two small improvements to spelling and grammar:

1\. "1960's" should be written as "1960s." It's incorrect to use an
apostrophe. 2\. Semicolons should separate complete, related sentences, not
fragments such as "an hour from Stanford on the coast, but that hasn't
helped."

I'm taking a moment to offer this feedback because I know that all good
writers can benefit from constructive criticism. I look forward to reading
more of the author's insightful posts.

~~~
moogabi
I believe I have used the apostrophe when writing 1960s, etc. Good to know the
rule, even though I'll need to get used to no apostrophe looking right. Does
the same rule apply when abbreviating 1960s as 60s. In this case, would an
apostrophe go before the 6, thus '60s?

~~~
yebyen
Apostrophe has two uses as far as I know... one is for elision ('60s indicates
that "19" has been elided or omitted) and possession (The 1910s' greatest
author was Franz Kafka)

The "grocer's apostrophe" or "grocers' apostrophe" is what's incorrectly added
to the plural form like what you're describing, the short answer is yes. '60s
not 60's.

~~~
btilly
Single quotes have another use. Which is to mark off quotations inside of
quotations.

Technically speaking you use single quotes there, but not apostrophes. However
I mention it because the quotation mark that you used is a single quote.

~~~
yebyen
Thanks. My keyboard only has one apostrophe/single quote key, as I suspect
most do, but I have been learning to use the compose key and I appreciate
little details like that.

------
praptak
Summary:

 _" Silicon Valley has a “pay-it-forward” culture where we try to help each
other without asking for anything in return."_

 _" So I’ve come up with is a method to sort out who I take meetings with."_

 _" I now prioritize meetings with a new filter: Who is offering me something
in return."_

By the way, I agree with the advice provided, it's just the way the author
gets to the point is a bit too winding for my simple mind :-)

~~~
akg_67
Not being in SV, I am jealous of "pay-it-forward" culture of SV. Seattle
doesn't seem to have same culture. Actually, even remotely by phone, I had
better success with SV people giving me some time for discussion compared to
Seattle people.

Personally, I take any meeting/concall request from entrepreneurs as long as I
have relevant domain knowledge and I know I can add something positive to the
conversation. I invariably learn more from such discussion specially when I
rehash the discussion in my mind afterward.

------
pacifi30
I recently got introduced to a long time entrepreneur who sold his latest
company recently by a friend. At the end of our coffee meeting when we were
about to leave, he asked me if I know what is WIIFY to which I said no. He
smiled at me and said that when you are running a business, its a most
important thing that you have to think about(What's in it for you) and it
actually applies to everything from getting users to sign up or getting some
investors to speak to you.

On a side note, he also told me that people like him also get interested in
knowing the failures you had in running your business and how you recovered
from it.

I guess at the end, it's a matter of persistence and may be some luck that
your pitch will arouse interest in someone's mind and they will say yes to
meet you. Until then keep building your product and learn as you go.

Shamless plug : I am building a dating platform for working professionals :)

www.jointruffle.com

------
beefxq
You don't want to meet those people anyways, seek the path of least
resistance, you'll come out further in life.

------
mathattack
90% of networking requests come with purely selfish intent. I recall the ONE
time that someone showed up to a meeting with a book that he heard would
interest me. Of course I went out of my way to assist.

Give first then get...

