

Where are the unhappy founders? - npk

[excuse a belated post about startup school]<p>I've been mulling over the differences between  YC startup school and academic conferences.  Startup school left me with a feeling I have not experience before....  It's hard to fully articulate, but perhaps "thrilling" is the best adjective.  Founders I met dream big, they're excited, and those feelings are contagious.<p>Am I crazy?  Are startup founders really as excited as perceived?  My primary fear is a selection effect.  Those interested and excited in startups, attend things like startup school, those who feel bitter, tired, or bored with startups, don't.<p>Still, the same could be said of academic conferences, yet, I have never felt the same air of excitement at one.  Why?  Am I missing something?  Did anyone else experience the same sensation?  Anyone interested in sharing their thoughts?<p>I'm utterly confused.  It's easy to drone on with my own hyperbole here.  I guess I'd rather hear yours.  :)
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aaroneous
I think optimism and near-limitless excitement for your project are generally
pre-reqs for doing a startup. Without them, it's pretty hard to justify
bootstrapping//low pay//14+ hour days//no weekends//no benefits//the
likelihood of failure//etc.

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michael_nielsen
On the academic side, it depends on which academic conferences you go to. When
I started going to quantum computing conferences (mid-1990s) there was a huge
buzz in the air. It was thrilling, better even than the best startup events
I've been to. The same cannot be said of quantum computing now - it's become
oversubscribed, which is why I've left the field, and am working on a startup.

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SwellJoe
Yes, you're seeing the selection effect at work.

I've started two startups now. While I'm very nearly the most even-keeled
person I know from an emotional standpoint (I've been described as "a robot",
"mellow", "a cold fish", and worse), a couple of years of running a startup is
like being bipolar. Perhaps for folks who are already bipolar without outside
influence, it's even worse, I dunno.

Here's how I think it goes for most startups:

 _Stage 1_

Great idea(s). I have a blinding flash of insight--first time my insight was
"the Internet is too damned slow!" (in 1999, this was a pretty good insight).
This time, with Virtualmin, it came as the gradual dawning of a Many Faceted
Great Truth rather than a flash. These feelings are akin to messianic visions
of the past. If they weren't we wouldn't be willing to quit our real jobs and
spend three to seven years tilting at windmills to make them happen. This is
exciting and very uplifting. I bet Jesus felt pretty good, too, when he woke
up with the flash of insight that he was the most important human on the
planet (and a god to boot!).

 _Stage 2 (where most folks start showing up to events)_

Talking about the idea with friends and peers. Taking this leap of committing
to the idea enough to share it with others and defend it feels like an
accomplishment, which is emotionally rewarding. You get some validation, and
you maybe spot a few problems and you work through them, which also feels
good.

Still feeling great at this point. But you haven't actually done anything.

 _Stage 3_

Now you've got to build something. A demo, if you just want to get to that
next stage of big validation that is raising money. This one is harder. If you
don't actually have the level of skill you thought you did (and we all hit
this sometimes, no matter how great we might be at some areas) you run into
roadblocks to completing this stage. This is where folks begin to drop out of
the event scene and start to think maybe this whole startup idea wasn't so
great after all. I've occasionally run into roadblocks that took me weeks or
months to resolve, either by learning enough to scale the wall or by hiring or
befriending someone who happened to have just the right knowledge (this is
harder than it seems). And these are the worst parts of the ride.

 _Stage 4 (wherein validation reaches new highs)_

Money. Some folks get addicted to raising money, and never actually get around
to building their product (these are the same people who never actually
succeed, by the way). When you raise money, not only is someone saying, "Yeah,
that's a pretty cool idea", they are saying, "I'm putting my money where my
mouth is, and I'm placing a huge bet on you being a big success."

However, before you get to that validation you will get numerous "no"
responses, and that's usually a big downer: people are saying your baby is
ugly, and kinda stupid. And you can't punch them in the mouth for saying so.

And at this point, you cycle between Stage 3 and Stage 4 until you fail or
build a real company that makes money. This cycle is somewhat arbitrary as to
how you'll be feeling at any given time...but the first two stages are action
packed excitement all the way. Nothing can go wrong until you actually start
doing something. Of course, nothing can really go right either...but you'll
feel like everything is going right and clicking into place, because humans
are funny that way.

~~~
npk
Great post. Two questions:

1) So, presuming you were at startupschool, did you notice the people who were
there tended to be more enthusiastic than is typical? If you did not attend,
was it because you are just too busy and/or tired/grumpy?

2) Isn't "no" common for almost all successful ventures? I guess I don't
understand why being constantly rejected for funding is any different between
any two different fields.

~~~
SwellJoe
1.

Yes, I was at Startup School. More enthusiastic than is "typical" of whom?
Startup people in general, or of the whole population?

Events for people starting startups are full of optimistic and enthusiastic
people. I try to go to about one per month. Last month it was Startup Camp,
this month it was Stirr Deal Hacks, and I pretty much always attend YC events
because they're among the best of the lot--though I got overwhelmed and
exhausted this year with the StartupSchool events (I'm an introvert and crowds
make me tired) and ended up skipping the after-party.

Anyway, I go just to keep perspective: we're not alone, we're not
astonishingly brilliant and unique, and we're not crazy. By this, I mean it
keeps things in perspective from both sides of the coin, by being both a
reminder that we aren't the only people who could do what we are doing so we
have to move fast and effectively, and also being a generally fun and
validating atmosphere.

2.

Of course. You asked about startups, so I told you about startups. Rejection
happens in every aspect of life. From cliques in school, to college
applications, to getting your first job, to raising money for a startup, to
getting a date with the pretty girl that works at the book store, etc. The
difference might be that when you're the messiah and you're going to change
the world, and someone tells you you're not and you can't, it's harder to
take. I'm not sure why some people take rejection by investors so hard (maybe
harder than other forms of rejection), but they do. As I mentioned I'm a
"robot/cold fish", and so I don't take it personally, but many startup
founders do.

And, of course, some of the best businesses have been rejected dozens of times
by investors. One rejection per idea is bad enough...dozens probably starts to
wear you down. I imagine authors have the same problem before they reach a
certain level of success, since one story may be rejected by dozens of people.
At least in the rest of life, each rejection is independent: The girl at the
book store says "no", but that's the only "no" you'll ever hear for that one
idea (the idea being "get a date with the cute girl at the book store", and
honestly, it's not a very big idea, anyway...she's cute, so many others have
probably had the same idea). Likewise for a job. You want to work at Google,
they say "no", OK, you move on. With a startup, you have a lot more invested
in the idea--often months or years of your life. Again, like a writer with a
story that she can't get published.

~~~
skmurphy
Rejection by potential customers or investors is not the hard part. Folks who
can't face that don't typically try and start something new. Here are some
things that are much more difficult to face: laying off employees (not firing
poor performers, letting good ones go because you can't pay them), shutting
the business down and negotiating with creditors, and getting fired by your
investors (or co-founders). These are not uncommon outcomes that get much less
press, conference time, and blog posts. I don't say these to discourage anyone
from an entrepreneurial career, I mention them because many founders seem less
mindful of the real possibilities of failure: most of the really painful
mistakes are made after initial success.

~~~
breck
Agreed--from experience. It hurt when our startup failed(after initial
success), and really hurt for a few months. Laying people off (mainly
ourselves), shutting down the business....it's very deflating. You hear
statistics like "90%" of startups fail--but you don't hear much else about
failure. Rarely are the gory details revealed. On the other hand, _every_
success is well documented and the intricate detailed are talked about ad
nauseam. It's very rare to talk about failure with anyone at these Startup
Events, IME.

One thing I can say about failure: being young definitely helps. We had a lot
less to lose than older people and plenty of opportunities to do different
things when that didn't work out. It wasn't easy to fail but I've bounced back
and am happy working in the non-startup world(though I've still been working
on side projects still, mostly for fun).

