
A Brief, Incomplete, and Mostly Wrong History of Programming Languages - DanielRibeiro
http://james-iry.blogspot.com/2009/05/brief-incomplete-and-mostly-wrong.html
======
f4stjack
"1996 - James Gosling invents Java. Java is a relatively verbose, garbage
collected, class based, statically typed, single dispatch, object oriented
language with single implementation inheritance and multiple interface
inheritance. Sun loudly heralds Java's novelty.

2001 - Anders Hejlsberg invents C#. C# is a relatively verbose, garbage
collected, class based, statically typed, single dispatch, object oriented
language with single implementation inheritance and multiple interface
inheritance. Microsoft loudly heralds C#'s novelty."

Hands down epic definition win.

~~~
perfunctory
My favourite is actually:

    
    
        1972 - Dennis Ritchie invents a powerful gun that shoots
        both forward and backward simultaneously. Not satisfied
        with the number of deaths and permanent maimings from
        that invention he invents C and Unix.

~~~
warfangle
This was actually a remix[1] and nod to the legendary guide, "Shooting
yourself in the foot in various programming languages,"[2] which has slowly
evolved over the course of usenet, gopher, and websockets.

I'm convinced that this list will one day be fed recursively into a prolog
console and become skynet.

1\. [http://blip.tv/goodiebag/everything-is-a-remix-
part-1-413601...](http://blip.tv/goodiebag/everything-is-a-remix-
part-1-4136010) 2\. [http://www.toodarkpark.org/computers/humor/shoot-self-in-
foo...](http://www.toodarkpark.org/computers/humor/shoot-self-in-foot.html)

~~~
ufo
I think skynet is smarter then the average two year old though.

------
skrebbel
I hate the factual inaccuracies in this post.

For example, it says that Rasmus Lerdorf got the idea for PHP at a
neighbourhood Italian restaurant, but Qeqertarsuaq has no Italian restaurants.

~~~
bad_user
Yeah, it also says that Larry Wall came up with Perl by falling asleep and
hitting his head on the keyboard, when in fact Perl was created through a
genetic algorithm -- that's why it takes so long for Perl 6 to happen, because
those specs they call Synopses keep changing and therefore the fitness metric
is not stable.

~~~
Jun8
:-) I think some will miss the funny bit about him being the prophet, etc.:
Larry Wall is very religious, e.g. that's why it's called "bless".

------
bitops
Only two minor quibbles:

1) did not mention Clojure.

2) broke the amusing narrative a bit in the middle by including a true story
(Perl).

Really funny otherwise.

------
chalst
We've had this story here several times before, most notably:

<http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=599164>

and

<http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=1327746>

~~~
boneheadmed
Syntax error

(you forgot the GOTO :)

~~~
boneheadmed
Ouch, down-voted. Who said programmers have no sense of humor? Well how about
this way:

"Mental pleasure are never cloy; unlike those of the body, they are increased
by repetition, approved by reflection, and strengthened by enjoyment." \-
Nathaniel Cotton

~~~
boneheadmed
Ok, a third time for the literalists, but I think it is my last attempt.
Nothing spoils a news.ycombinator.com comment party like the scolding
professor who comments: "We've had this story posted a number of times here.
One ruler to the hand for each iteration." Particularly with something so
comical. This blog post should be re-posted at least monthly. And for the
humor-impaired weekly.

No do as you will with me cruel world. You can take away my karma and even my
upvote, but you can't take away my dignity.

(On the other hand, if the down votes were for recommending GOTO instead of
GOSUB, then this is completely understandable.)

~~~
chalst
It was a good joke and there were some nice comments. If you want to relive
the comment thread again and again, the web is full of places where the joke
would still be fresh.

HN would be just a little bit better without these "lets do the comment party
again" threads.

~~~
boneheadmed
Appreciate your reply, and without needlessly belaboring the issue any more
then I have, perhaps a "greatest hits" page for worthy articles would be in
order as suggested below. Because truly, it can be difficult to ensure seeing
every worthy article that makes it's way up the HN page.

------
mafro
Absolutely brilliant. As a relative HN newbie, this really should posted about
once a year.

"Later still, in an effort to cash in on the popularity of skin diseases the
language is renamed ECMAScript."

~~~
cs702
I'd go further: why not have a "Wall of Fame" section on HN to which we can
nominate submissions that deserve a permanent link somewhere?

UPDATE: I've submitted this comment as a question here:
<http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=3505201>

------
vvnraman
This has to be the best line - _It is a syntax error to write FORTRAN while
not wearing a blue tie._

~~~
tintin
_"1965 - Kemeny and Kurtz go to 1964."_ gave me a big smile...

~~~
edanm
I didn't get that one, actually. Am I just being dumb or is there a backstory?

~~~
buff-a

      10 PRINT "<rude message here>"
      20 GOTO 10
    

They used to sell computers in stores that you could walk up to and program.
BASIC was the command prompt for some computers. The above was the inevitable
result.

~~~
kstenerud
My favorite trick was to poke values into the sound registers, THEN goto!

~~~
mkup
yeah,

    
    
      10 BEEP
      20 GOTO 10

~~~
kstenerud
Actually I was thinking more along the lines of programming the SID to output
a sawtooth waveform and modulate it for extra annoyance, but whatever floats
your boat.

------
johnx123-up

      2003 - A drunken Martin Odersky sees a Reese's Peanut Butter
      Cup ad featuring somebody's peanut butter getting on 
      somebody else's chocolate and has an idea. He creates Scala, 
      a language that unifies constructs from both object oriented 
      and functional languages. This pisses off both groups and 
      each promptly declares jihad.
    

Nice take:-)

------
ThomPete
If you haven't already I would really recommend you to read the book:

The Information: A History, a Theory, a Flood

[http://www.amazon.com/Information-History-Theory-
Flood/dp/03...](http://www.amazon.com/Information-History-Theory-
Flood/dp/0375423729)

Great detailed historical perspective and lots of aha moments.

~~~
davidw
What in particular about it did you like? Does it have stuff that's not
'generally known' amongst the hacker set?

~~~
dsr_
If you're the sort of person who has read the Jargon File, understands
algorithmic complexity, and finds beauty in Hofstadter, you probably know
everything in Gleick's book. I kept waiting for a punchline, but there wasn't
one.

~~~
ThomPete
That's true. I still do think there was some good historical info that I at
least wasn't aware of.

------
aussiegirl
The oldest use of programming was in ancient times. They even had automated
plays that were "programmed" with ropes and spindles.

Sadly, the records of much of which were probably lost with the library of
alexandria.

<http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hero_of_Alexandria>

------
antirez
a rare instance of programming humor that is actually fun

------
laconian
I wouldn't mind an entry about the metastasis of Javascript beyond the
confines of the browser. The awfulness of JS refuses to go away!

~~~
gtani
The node and coffeescript crowd is going to want ot have a meaningful dialog
with you

~~~
laconian
Coffeescript is just a tacit admission that Javascript is capital-N Nasty.

------
v33ra
//Programmable Hyperlinked Pasta (PHP)//

No wonder it is being served by a 'server'! :)

------
daniel_iversen
LOVE it! :) :)

