
Why Am I So Lazy? - colinprince
https://www.thecut.com/2018/01/ask-polly-why-am-i-so-lazy.html
======
bambax
> _I see this shit every day in other parents: “She hates to read!” “He’s
> lazy!” “She’s bad at math!” You are imprisoning your kid with your words,
> fuckers!_

That's spot on. It's really upsetting to hear people say that about children,
especially people with authority (parents, grandparents). DON'T DO THAT!

Or, if you have to do that (!?!) at least be positive. Don't tell a kid she's
bad at math, tell her she's good at math and you're surprised she doesn't get
good grades -- she's a natural! all of this should be sooo easy for her! there
must be something holding her back.

People tend to conform to other people's opinions of them; they will get good
at math just to match the image we're projecting on them.

~~~
pbhjpbhj
In think this has been shown to get worse results than praising effort.

I call my kids out for being lazy when they're being lazy.

Examples from this morning "I don't know what the second rucksack is": meaning
"I can't be bothered getting it out the rucksack, you do it for me", my answer
"You just want someone else to do it, stop being lazy and get it yourself".
Also "I can't do it [take off my boots]": meaning "I don't want to bother, and
my hands will get dirty", my answer "why should someone else get their hands
dirty, just because you can't be bothered to pull" (then I demonstrated what
to do, then mimicked his pretending he couldn't do it in order to demonstrate
I knew what he was up to). It's not for nothing my kids get me Darth Vader
merchandise!

~~~
specialist
Context. Tearing down vs empowering.

I loved volunteering in my son's classroom(s). But I admit to having rage-fits
when a beautiful, sweet, talented little 6 year old boy forfeits on a task,
telling me "I'm stupid, I can't do anything".

There's no question how his parents talked to him.

~~~
Bradlinc
I am not sure I would blame the parents. As a kid I would say that I was
stupid and couldn't do anything even though everyone around me was telling me
how smart I was. I watch the same thing occurring in my six year old daughter
now, even though I am sure nobody is saying that to her. It was a confidence
thing for me. This didn't change until I was in my teens and was clearly
better at certain things than others.

~~~
orbitur
For me it was effort required. I was an early reader, and the first few years
of elementary were a breeze, but at some point I decided if I had to work at
anything, I didn't want to do it.

If I couldn't immediately answer the question, I felt was just stupid and it
wasn't worth my time.

This, in spite of a family insisting I was the greatest.

~~~
Tenhundfeld
> This, in spite of a family insisting I was the greatest.

Some would argue it's _because_ of your family insisting you were the
greatest, in part.

>At some point I decided if I had to work at anything, I didn't want to do it.
If I couldn't immediately answer the question, I felt [it] was just stupid and
it wasn't worth my time.

Yep, you are a smart, great person. Your family loves you because of all of
the smart, great things you do, in part. If something is hard and doesn't come
naturally to you? It must be something stupid and not great. So don't worry,
you are still smart and great, and people still love you. Don't try anything
hard.

I'm obviously being facetious, but according to some experts (though not all,
not even most), that emotional dynamic is encouraged by praising kids for
their intelligence or abilities, instead of effort. I don't know how much I
believe it, but that type of weird insecurity does seem fairly common among
intelligent people who were extremely precocious.

------
oceanghost
My wife is very similar to the person who wrote this article. She will not do
anything she can procrastinate. Nothing. I personally think its some sort of
insidious depression. It's destroyed our lives together, and I'm on the verge
of asking for a divorce for the... 3rd time, except this time, I'm going to
just file.

It is absolutely impossible to have the energy for both people in a
relationship. My health is suffering from the stress. Things are so bad that I
have to make sure she eats.

Nobody but me knows this side of her, she projects an image of a healthy,
successful person.

edit: A marriage is a zero-sum game. Any chore she doesn't do, I am forced to.
I've gradually had to give up everything that makes me happy to fund this
depression of hers. I used to be a serious lifter, I was well into writing two
novels, I did electronics projects, had an active night life, went to
concerts. Now, I'm just a robot that does chores.

~~~
fallous
I'd say that a bad marriage is a zero-sum game, but a good marriage results in
both sides ending up better than they started.

I don't know you or your wife and can't presume to tell you how or whether to
fix the situation (assuming it could be), but the lesson I learned long ago
regarding relationships is to honestly evaluate yourself and define your
capabilities and needs (not wants, but the things you absolutely require) and
to either have your partner do the same (or less optimally evaluate them
yourself as best you can). If you have a need that cannot be realistically
satisfied by the _current_ capabilities of your partner, or vice versa, then
end the relationship as quickly as you can. Attempting to have a relationship
with someone who does not satisfy your needs, or you cannot satisfy theirs, is
a doomed effort and the longer you remain in the relationship the worse and
more hostile it will become. Walk away as friends before you build up
resentments and end up leaving as enemies.

~~~
oceanghost
This is great advice thank you.

------
josephpmay
From the little "Sloth" wrote, it sounds like it's possible she might have
undiagnosed ADHD.

As someone with ADHD myself, I instantly recognized the inability to get
myself to start working on something until the last minute (even if I really,
really want to do it) and the piles clothes (despite my propensity for
cleanliness). Another hallmark of ADHD that many don't know about is bursts of
almost manic productivity for random tasks or when under extreme pressure.

If she does have ADHD, Polly's answer is both unhelpful and somewhat
dangerous.

~~~
ajkjk
I think that's a little extreme and reminds me of the problematic trend of
giving psychiatric medication to anyone who asks for it. I mean, yes, there's
a chance they 'actually have ADHD', but there's also a much higher chance they
are one of the tremendous number of people who have trouble getting themselves
to do things that aren't urgent. I'm on that list too. So are lots of people.
Sloth sounds so incredibly _normal_ to me.

~~~
taneq
I'm not sure "actually have ADHD" is a thing. (Edit: Emphasis on "actually",
not on "ADHD". ADHD is a thing. In between "really do have it" and "really
don't have it", though, is a huge grey area, and that's what I'm getting at.)

I mean, there are certainly people (maybe even most people) who function
better on stimulants. And there are certainly people who don't function well
when not on stimulants. But it's all a set of sliding scales, there's no clear
line with "has ADHD" on one side and "just lazy" on the other.

~~~
sudosteph
The science is not on your side for this view. I suggest you read up to get a
more informed view, Dr. Russell Barkley is a great resource, has videos all
over youtube.

In the meantime, here's a quote from "International Consensus Statement on
ADHD" (Clinical Child and Family Psychology Review, Vol. 5, No. 2, June 2002)

> We cannot overemphasize the point that, as a matter of science, the notion
> that ADHD does not exist is simply wrong. All of the major medical as-
> sociations and government health agencies recognize ADHD as a genuine
> disorder because the scientific evidence indicating it is so overwhelming.

~~~
taneq
I'm not saying ADHD doesn't exist or that it's not a genuine disorder. I'm
saying that there's a huge no-mans-land between "you're fine" and "woah yeah
you clearly have ADHD and we should fix this."

~~~
TeMPOraL
Indeed there is, and the way psychiatry approaches it in terms of diagnosis
isn't really good, either. There is a long but very insightful article on this
topic that was recently featured on HN, by Scott Alexander, who's a practicing
psychiatrist:

[http://slatestarcodex.com/2017/12/28/adderall-risks-much-
mor...](http://slatestarcodex.com/2017/12/28/adderall-risks-much-more-than-
you-wanted-to-know/)

Key quote for this topic:

> But “ability to concentrate” is a normally distributed trait, like IQ. We
> draw a line at some point on the far left of the bell curve and tell the
> people on the far side that they’ve “got” “the disease” of “ADHD”. This
> isn’t just me saying this. _It’s the neurostructural literature, the the
> genetics literature, a bunch of other studies, and the the Consensus
> Conference On ADHD._ This doesn’t mean ADHD is “just laziness” or “isn’t
> biological” – of course it’s biological! Height is biological! But that
> doesn’t mean the world is divided into two natural categories of “healthy
> people” and “people who have Height Deficiency Syndrome“. Attention is the
> same way. Some people really do have poor concentration, they suffer a lot
> from it, and it’s not their fault. They just don’t form a discrete
> population.

(Emphasis mine - pointing out the sentence which, in original article, is
basically one big collection of links to references backing it up.)

~~~
TheSpiceIsLife
Do you think that in fifty, maybe one-hundred, years people will look back at
our present day understand of psychiatry and shake their heads.

~~~
curun1r
I don't know how we'll view psychology, but I believe we'll look back at a
number of psychological illnesses and realize that they're a result of our
environmental factors much more so than they are naturally-occurring diseases.
ADHD is a prime example. I believe modern life is highly over-stimulating us
and a sizable subset of our society has trouble coping. Was ADHD a problem
before the advent of TV, cell phones, the internet and our 24/7, immediately-
available society? It's possible that people used to just go undiagnosed, but
I believe it just wasn't as much of a problem as it is today.

Concentration is a skill that can be practiced. I've struggled with it myself
and have found that meditation is far more effective than medication in
dealing with it. Moreover, when I do retreats or backpacking trips where I'm
cut off from the digital world, all my concentration issues disappear. It's
made me believe that modern psychiatry is myopiclly focused on identifying and
treating symptoms and largely ignores the avoidable causes of those symptoms.

~~~
TeMPOraL
> _It 's made me believe that modern psychiatry is myopiclly focused on
> identifying and treating symptoms and largely ignores the avoidable causes
> of those symptoms._

I disagree with that, even though I agree a lot of mental issues are heavily
environmental. The reason psychiatry tries to work around them is that the
environment of modern civilization is what we have, it's not going to change
(easily), and in the meantime, people need to live somehow. Backpacking
retreats are a cool hack if you can afford it regularly, but most people can't
- they get maybe one longer stretch of free time a year.

The environment we live in is wholly unlike the environment we're adapted to.
I'm not sure if we can _or want to_ get meaningfully closer to the old days to
alleviate our mental pains - for all our adaptations, the ancestral
environment _sucked hard_ compared to today, and modern civilization fixed at
least as much as it broke.

------
gdubs
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is interesting for this type of thing -
mindfulness meditation too. Both are helpful at gaining clarity around
overgeneralizations we make about ourselves. In meditation it’s very common to
reach a point of realization that ‘what we are’ is not equal to the labels we
attach to ourselves.

Both cause a kind of short-circuiting of the “automatic thoughts” we have in
response to emotional triggers. In cognitive behavioral therapy, something
like procrastination is addressed by listing all of the thoughts you have in
response to the thing you’re avoiding, identifying irrationalities, and
forming rational responses. It can be very effective at easing anger, fear,
sadness, and lack of motivation.

With mindfulness, over time it’s possible to begin decoupling your true self
from all of the labels. This is also known as “ego death”, and can be somewhat
painful and uncomfortable - the ego tends to fight back when it feels you
letting go of it. In deep meditation it can be almost frightening to
experience the ego disappear; we go through most of our lives thinking we
_are_ the labels we’ve associated with ourselves. To let go of the labels can
feel like letting go of yourself. Blissful meditation is a state of just
being; no labels.

I recommend checking out the book “Feeling Good” if you want to know more
about CBT, and there are tons of resources on mindfulness, but Zen Mind
Beginner’s Mind is great (as well as most of Alan Watts’ lectures you can find
on YouTube).

~~~
meesterdude
CBT is good, but actually I would not recommend CBT for laziness. It can help
with other things for sure - such as self disturbances, idealizations, and
acceptance. It may even be considered a good foundation - But, it does not
challenge the fundamental drivers of your life that induce laziness. At least
it did not for me.

Acceptance & Commitment Therapy (ACT) was created, IIRC, from seeing people go
through CBT but still suffer from emotions & avoidance. While it overlaps with
CBT in some ways, it identifies things like the way language shapes our
thinking, and proposes we lead by our values instead of by our emotions. Be
present in the moment, accept your feelings but don't justify your behavior by
them, and do what matters.

I only figured I'd mention, because I recently learned about ACT after being
an advocate for CBT, and coming to see where they work and where they don't.

[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acceptance_and_commitment_ther...](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acceptance_and_commitment_therapy)

------
20years
Maybe she is not lazy at all. Maybe she just doesn't want to work on things
that don't motivate or interest her. It is my ultimate goal to never have to
work on things that don't interest me if only I can figure out a way to
automate all of that ;)

The fact that she has succeeded in getting A's with waiting until the last
minute and not putting in much effort, indicates that she is very smart. I
have noticed that really smart people seem to lack motivation and get bored
very easily. The two closest people to me are like this. The thing is though,
when they find something that does interest them, there is no stopping them.
They turn into the hardest working people around.

~~~
csbowe
Agreed. Lazy is lacking the desire to achieve what one considers worth
achieving. If tasks like cleaning and laundry are accomplishments worth less
within one's mental value system than, say, the feeling of spending time
enjoying an excellent TV show then choice is clear.

The key to turning around my perceived lazyness, personally, is about trying
to control the value of what I spend my time on.

~~~
bcyn
Thanks for this comment, I really really agree with this sentiment and you put
it really nicely in words.

------
Buldak
When I was failing classes in college, I had a conversation with a dean who
suggested that I subconsciously didn't want to be there, and that I was
committing academic self-sabotage as a result. This struck me as an
extravagant, bizarre theory. (Cynically, I also wonder if she was trying to
convince me to voluntarily leave the college so that I wouldn't ding their
graduation rate.)

I tend to be suspicious of this kind of move, where what seems like a
character flaw is explained away as something more benign. In the article in
question, the author suggests that the woman writing in is not really lazy,
but has been holding back out of fear that she might disappoint herself. But
why can't she just be lazy? I don't doubt that there are people who have the
kind of subtle psychology that the author suggests. But I wonder if we're too
eager to accept such explanations because they are more comforting than more
straightforward, harsher ones.

~~~
gizmo686
What does it mean to be "lazy"? Why are some people lazy, and others not? Why
are people lazy with regards to certain things and not others?

Ignoring all of these questions and simply considering laziness to be a
fundamentally characteristic is highly unsatisfying and, dare I say, lazy.

Maybe the authors explanation is wrong, but she offers a potential
explanation. Your proposal is simply that 'she is lazy because she is lazy'
which offers no explanatory power.

~~~
invalidOrTaken
>What does it mean to be "lazy"?

A few months ago my little brother was taking an introductory CS class. I
warned him not to procrastinate his assignments, because you can't hurry
programming. Nine women can't make a baby in one month, etc.

I think "laziness" is similar: it's an emergent phenomenon to be debugged, not
a single "thing" to be attacked with more-of something.

------
sudosteph
I wish this advice mentioned the importance of ruling out issues like ADHD
first, especially the inattentive type which is often underdiagnosed in women.
I really relate to OPs description, and if she does have an exectutive
functioning disorder that makes task prioritization inadequate and non-
stimulating activities unrewarding to a massive extent, it wont be simply a
matter of "overcoming fear" to start directing herself in a way that is more
satisfying. If anything, it's a recipe for depression and frustration to try
to act on advice like this if you have untreated ADHD.

------
iandanforth
Warning - rant.

I wish HN would ban BS psychology articles. There are real, scientific,
actionable steps to understanding perceived motivational deficit and this
article doesn't get close to them. It retreads stigmatizing labels,
regurgitates useless advice, and provokes high confidence low value anecdotes.

1\. Motivation is a chemical state.

You can induce motivation _generically_ through dopamine reuptake inhibitors.
Why do you think Adderall makes you clean your room? It's not a sudden hatred
for dust, it's that your baseline motivation to accomplish any task is
enhanced and you're in a task rich environment with a messy room. Many other
interesting chemical pathways and interventions exist to directly change the
frequency and nature of task initiation performance and completion.

2\. Environment strongly impacts internal chemical state.

Take an "addicted" rat and put her into a rich environment and the apparently
highly motivating cocaine reward looses its attraction. Take a minimally
athletic human and put a bear behind them and they will run.

In neither of the above does a person need to re-evaluate their life and
identity, utter crap.

My point here is that HN has an unusual respect for technically interesting
and accurate news. It's not all gold, but it seems to favor factual pieces
over largely emotional and unproductive arguments. Pop-psychology and feel
good generic advice blogs are firmly in that second category. Their value has
not advanced since the 50s and we should start seeing them as the kind of
harmful, anti-scientific, community deviding memes they are.

End rant.

~~~
Sir_Cmpwn
How about banning BS psychology HN comments, too?

It sounds like you're basically talking about ego depletion, which has come
under fire in the past few years, with what little evidence there was for it
coming into doubt:

[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ego_depletion](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ego_depletion)

~~~
iandanforth
I respect the spirit of your response but no. Here are some interesting
studies.

One of many candidate drug evaluations -
[https://academic.oup.com/ijnp/article/17/12/2045/2910067](https://academic.oup.com/ijnp/article/17/12/2045/2910067)

Dosage dependant effects and tolerance -
[https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/2530095/](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/2530095/)

Environment protecting against addiction -
[https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/22157144/](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/22157144/)

Edit - Couldn't find a good source for the bear thing. Apologies!

~~~
PragmaticPulp
Reductionist arguments based on narrowly-scoped rodent studies are not
appropriate in the context of long-term human motivation.

"Motivation is a chemical state" is a tautology in the context of psychology.
Every human behavior and emotion derives from the chemical state of the brain.
If someone is chronically unsatisfied with their life, would you reduce their
concerns to "Happiness is a chemical state"? Stating as much does not add
value to the discussion, nor is it actionable.

Likewise, in the context of human motivation it's not relevant to discuss
rodent lever-pushing behavior following acute administration of large doses of
high-potency DAT inhibitors. If someone is unhappy, would you provide links to
studies showing that rodent display increased liking behaviors after
administration of a potent opioid?

Stimulants like Adderall do induce generic motivation in the short-term, but
that's not anyone is discussing here. Implying that stimulants are a source of
motivation is dangerous advice. The motivational effects are largely
temporary, and quickly give way to tolerance. Note that the attention-
improving effects mostly remain in this case.

Drug abusers who seek motivation-boosting effects from stimulants either give
up after tolerance sets in, or they settle into patterns of dose escalation in
a futile attempt to outrun tolerance.

Dopaminergic stimulant abusers often have extremely high motivation during
their binges, but it does not translate to anything useful after marathon
obsessive cleaning sessions or internet binges. That's because motivation, in
the context of what we're discussing here, is far more complex than just
modulating your brain's dopaminergic systems with chemicals. Motivation is a
much broader topic that involves discipline, goal-oriented behavior,
prioritization, self-reflection, and many other complex phenomena that can't
be reduced into a singular brain chemical like dopamine.

------
natecavanaugh
This was an article that I read and pleasantly winced as the author called out
not only my weak choices, but my reasoning for them.

I understand this article isn't for everyone, or maybe even most people, but
it's for sure the thing I needed to read now.

------
dgreensp
As someone who used to be much like the asker and is now a little more like
the answerer, I cannot recommend this answer enough! It is so insightful and
well-put.

Treat it as breadcrumbs from someone farther along on the journey of growth
and self-discovery.

~~~
mixmastamyk
Indeed, the part about overachieving relatives hit home also. Mine have big
houses, lots of cars, and a big screen in every room. I'm not interested in
any of that but would like to meet them a bit closer in their direction, i.e.
motivation.

------
pravda
I'm not sure how this got here, but wow, Heather Havrilesky is still around.
She wrote for Suck in the early days of the web.

[http://www.suck.com/fish/contributors/havrilesky/](http://www.suck.com/fish/contributors/havrilesky/)

~~~
jholman
Oh, man, I didn't even read the byline, and didn't guess that the Polly in
Dear Polly is Polly Esther. Damn I miss her Suck column.

------
jv22222
I have a theory that the reason I am so lazy is because being a programmer
teaches me to find the fastest short cut way to do things.

Actually the less code I use to get a task done the better the code is and I
get a dopamine hit.

Also, if I write a great script that saves me hours on a boring manual task, I
get another dopamine hit.

As a 10x coder I wonder if all these dopamine hits (20+ years) have short
circuited my brain and made me want to do everything with the least amount of
effort as possible.

Or, maybe I'm just lazy ;)

------
firekvz
I tried to read this but I couldnt, thats how lazy I am.

~~~
unkeen
But you _did_ manage to write this comment! Someone else could have been way
too lazy for that, too.

------
CoolestBeans
It seems a little ridiculous that the author of the response would know that
the "Sloth" isn't actually lazy but really afraid. Especially when the author
also tells the "Sloth" to ignore what other people have said about them.

Maybe I'm missing the bigger picture, but how is the author not just another
one of the squirrels she describes?

~~~
Profan
It does read a bit like what you would hear a "psychic" write in response to a
short question, such a long response seems an unreasonably confident response
without any more back and forth between the two.

I'm actually a bit surprised so many people here are quickly falling into
conclusions about what was and wasn't said when it doesn't seem like it has
been explored enough to have anything conclusive determined from it..

But then it's also just an essay meant to speak to certain people and not for
everyone in a popular magazine, so eh.

~~~
TeMPOraL
My immediate impression was that both texts are written by the same person.
But then again, the "Sloth" section rings _way_ too true for it to be
something just set up for analyzing in the latter part.

------
mythrwy
I used to be lazy but then I started using Pomodoro, Fasting, Keto, Going to
the Gym, Test Driving Development and microdosing with psilocybin. And I
deleted Facebook and quit using Google in favor of Duck Duck Bing.

Now I'm just crazy but no one can accuse me of laziness.

------
hartator
Weirdly, a management book - a sense of urgency by John P. Kotter - was also
one of the best book to get things done in my personal life as well.

A quick summary: It’s kind of easy, if you don’t feel a true sense of
emergency, you’ll natuaraly not do it.

------
UncleEntity
> You’re choosing a lifestyle of avoidance and low expectations.

What's wrong with that?

Some people have laid their heart open to the benign indifference of the
universe and are just like: "what's the point?"

~~~
koonsolo
There is nothing wrong with that. But in this case there is, because it
doesn't make her happy.

~~~
pbhjpbhj
You can choose then to try to become happy with it, or to change it. The
parents point may have been that there are options.

------
smallnamespace
'I divide my officers into four groups. There are clever, diligent, stupid,
and lazy officers. Usually two characteristics are combined. Some are clever
and diligent -- their place is the General Staff. The next lot are stupid and
lazy -- they make up 90 percent of every army and are suited to routine
duties. Anyone who is both clever and lazy is qualified for the highest
leadership duties, because he possesses the intellectual clarity and the
composure necessary for difficult decisions. One must beware of anyone who is
stupid and diligent -- he must not be entrusted with any responsibility
because he will always cause only mischief.'

\-- Kurt Freiherr von Hammerstein-Equord (1878-1943), Commander-in-Chief of
the Reichswehr

~~~
dweekly
"I drink wine...and know things."

~~~
godelmachine
Am I right when I say that's Tyrion Lannister? :)

~~~
pbhjpbhj
Pretty sure it's GRR Martin!

------
leoc
This may be relevant: "‘I Thought I Was Lazy’: The Invisible Day-To-Day
Struggle For Autistic Women" [https://theestablishment.co/i-thought-i-was-
lazy-the-invisib...](https://theestablishment.co/i-thought-i-was-lazy-the-
invisible-day-to-day-struggle-for-autistic-women-6268515175f3)

~~~
dsego
Could disorganized thought and executive issues in ones 20/30ies be
foretelling of some form of dementia in 50/60ies, like frontotemporal
dementia?

------
pkalinowski
Being lazy is natural and it is what pushes humanity forward. We don't want to
do things, so we try to work on it less in the future - automating things,
improving efficiency etc.

Being "lazy" about some things is good for you. Do not focus much on stuff
which is not very important for you personally.

~~~
bjourne
Did you read the article? The premise of her question is that she thinks she
is lazy AND she is not satisfied with that. Clearly, being "lazy" is not good
if your laziness makes you unhappy.

~~~
pkalinowski
What if the laziness is not a problem, but feeling unhappy because of this
laziness? Why you should be unhappy? Billions of people are lazy and they love
it.

There are lot of people preaching that being "efficient" all your life is what
you should aim for and, weirdly, everyone accepts this as unquestionable
truth.

------
sgentle
> Both the cynic and the underachiever are afraid of sticking their necks out
> and becoming who they deeply, passionately want to become, for fear of
> looking stupid or failing.

I have also experienced this for an equal but opposite reason. Not a fear of
failure but a fear of success, either because it feels undeserved or because
of the responsibility that might come with it.

To quote that thing that Mandela didn't say:

> Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we
> are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most
> frightens us.

> We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?

> Actually, who are you not to be?

------
5_minutes
The good kind of lazy, is actually often just being very efficient.

------
ggm
Oblomov by Goncharev..

------
Overtonwindow
Antipathy, depression, mild burnout, career dissatisfaction, and cannabis.

------
saulrh
Motivational essays are this are great for some people. Others, on the other
hand, are persuaded to avoid seeking help for medical (mental health,
hormonal, etc) problems that are wrecking their lives. Overmedication is a
problem, yes, but this particular field is catastrophically underdiagnosed
because its problems have come to be seen as moral failings and the _fault_ of
the sufferer. If you are so "lazy" that you have trouble with day-to-day life,
you do not need to "man up" or "reject your self-image". You need to talk to a
physician. Such problems are well within their purview. Modern psychiatry has
infinitely better cognitive tricks than the moralizing platitudes in
motivational essays. If you're really lucky, your physician will guess two-
thirds of your symptoms before you describe them, diagnose you with a
particular neurochemical deficiency, and prescribe you a medication that, in
the space of a week, does more to help you with your problems than you'd
managed in your entire life to date.

TL;DR: You aren't qualified to condemn every "lazy" person on the planet, so
quit it with the victim-blaming. Some people need this kind of advice but you
aren't the person that should be giving it. Let the professionals do it,
because they can, first, do no harm.

~~~
marcoperaza
You're discounting the value of moral thinking. You can reduce everything to a
medical issue, because all human behavior is indeed biologically caused, but
you are failing to consider that blame and fault and other moral concepts are
exactly the kind of thing the mind is responsive to. Why are you so hostile to
those, but so eager to pump people full of drugs, designed and dispensed on
the basis of our very poor understanding of the the brain[1].

[1] Which is not to say that there's no place for psychiatric medication, but
they should not be the first course of action.

~~~
watwut
Because if you do need that drug or have condition, shaming you instead so
that other people are scared and less lazy is unethical.

Because blaming and shaming people for their mental conditions makes treatment
harder.

Because if we are talking about people who tried to change and did not
succeeded multiple times, adding more shame solves literally nothing.

------
sjg007
To be followed later in life by, "I know I am lazy"..

------
otempomores
I wonder whether the author considered what s/he/it compares self against. A
manic programmer can go for two days without sleep before collapse. Its
extremely unhealthy and socially isolating and to Try to become like that is
literally nuts. Ask yourself what all those who archive your dream performance
don't have before going for it

