
CEOs Don’t Come Pre-Made. Authentic Leadership Has To Be Learned - krutal
http://techcrunch.com/2012/12/01/the-path-to-a-culture-of-success-is-paved-with-authentic-leadership/
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poemorella
I am an introvert and I manage a group of 22 employees in my now 8 year
company. I have learned that the best way to connect with people is not to
take myself too seriously. Also, make their time worthwhile when talking to
them, don't ever over-promise and really, genuinely care about what they say
to you.

~~~
jjb123
"take your job seriously and yourself lightly." -herb kelleher

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coffeemug
_They didn’t sweat. They didn’t cry. They squirmed in their own skin, playing
a role of their own inventing. A leader in times of crisis can’t have an iota
of fakeness in him._

I love this quote, and it doesn't just apply to leaders or CEOs, it applies to
_people_. Most people I know squirm in their own skin in their personal lives,
playing a role of their own inventing. Very, very few people are comfortable
enough with themselves to let the people around them peek inside.
Interestingly, letting people see you squirm tends to have extremely
therapeutic effect, so all that energy you wasted on putting up a facade was
completely unnecessary.

That being said, I think there is a very fine line here, and excessive honesty
can be disastrous. If you try to snatch the curtain away in one fell swoop
while you're still uncomfortable in your own skin, what you think will seem
authentic, will almost certainly be perceived as an outright panic (because
that's what it is). You can't do it too early -- it's a gradual, often painful
process of learning, self-acceptance, and building authentic relationships
with other people. You're too scared to let the people see your inner self
because you're weak, so you lift the curtain a little bit. Doing that gives
you insights about yourself and about others, which in turn builds strength.
Then you can lift the curtain a little more. Rinse, and repeat, hopefully for
the rest of your life.

That being said, some people have a natural inclination to go through this
process much, much quicker than others. It has certainly been a difficult
process for me, and I'm still nowhere near the finish line (in fact, I think
this process is asymptotic, and I am just now beginning see the asymptote
somewhere in the distance).

~~~
loceng
It's not safe, at least the business world or towards strangers, to open
yourself up to vulnerable or moments where you're powerless - because you
won't have any idea how people will react, and many people are assholes.
Hopefully with family, friends, and hopefully a close-knit team of people who
respect and trust you, they too, will be safe to open yourself up to being
vulnerable and show your powerlessness in certain situations. This is when I
believe a team could become even stronger, when people have the opportunity to
come together and problem solve. You hit right on the mark with mentioning
building authentic relationships. It takes time to learn how to do that
though, as you said - and I too see the process giving you exponential gains
as you move along; I'm getting better at it as I go.

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mbesto
Reminds me of the Drucker quote:

 _"Leadership cannot be taught or learned."_ [1]

Which is funny, because the article itself is a lesson about what is required
to become a leader.

[1]- <http://books.google.co.uk/books?id=mV3XM28AdoIC>

~~~
pm90
I guess the sentiment in that statement is that you can't really teach what
the full gamut of leadership really is in a "course" or "lecture", but only by
hard lessons learned in life. Or through other's lives, which we can read
about in books, which "lectures" or "courses" try to condense in a manner that
is palatable to the majority.

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zem
the ceo of my last company took it as an article of faith that "you don't need
to be liked in order to get results" (which, of course, was his self-
justification for being an asshole to everyone, but he had really managed to
convince himself of it). i was never able to explain to him how wrong it was,
he just dismissed it as me being a techie who "didn't understand people".

~~~
legutierr
I honestly struggled with this question for years. Your former boss seems to
be missing some perspective, without a doubt, but isn't it possible to take
likability too far? Isn't it the case that getting things done inevitably
means stepping on some toes?

With some experience and hindsight, it seems to me now that some kind of
balance is what's required. What I strive for today as a manager is fairness
and consistency during those tough moments when a team just isn't getting it
done. And without a doubt, inspiration gets you much further than admonition.
But when real money--and people's jobs--are at stake, sometimes it seems like
the right thing is to disregard bruised egos.

Is there a right answer? I don't think so. Isn't what matters whether or not
what you're doing works for you? If being an asshole is what worked for your
ex-boss, do you think he would have been successful any other way?

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saraid216
> isn't it possible to take likability too far? Isn't it the case that getting
> things done inevitably means stepping on some toes?

The key is in _why_ you're liked. If you're liked because you're tough but
fair, that's a good reason to be liked. (Open to debate, but it's an example.)
If you're liked because you're constantly bribing your way into everyone's
good graces, that's not.

Really, the trick is to not care about whether or not you're liked, as that
boss thought. Where he got it wrong is what you do instead. Competence
involves people management, and people management involves both massaging and
bruising egos. You need to be competent, to "get results", and if you do that
by breaking as few eggs as possible to get there, people will back your play,
will recognize the inevitable necessity of those eggs and not make a huge deal
out of it. Competence can't come at the cost of competence: that's literally
self-defeating.

~~~
saraid216
Or, I just thought of a simpler, and better known aphorism:

Make _them_ look good.

As a boss, you make your team look good. As a business, you make your customer
look good. As a team member, you make your leader look good. And so on. Accept
credit when it's offered, precisely because _giving_ that credit makes them
look good, and share that credit because public praise is good.

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ilaksh
I thought there would be more content in an article with that title.

I don't think that good leaders need to learn how to be authentic or how to
appear authentic to others.

I think that educated, intelligent, capable, ethical and self-confident people
are naturally authentic in that they aren't so insecure as to try to hide
their errors and are wise enough to know that insincere speech or behavior
will be detected and detrimental.

I mean, I guess a lot of people really do need to be told this stuff, but I
would rather be led by someone who had figured that stuff on their own by
default (_without_ needing a lot of executive experience). And those people
are out there.

~~~
Evbn
"The key to success is sincerity. If you can fake that, that you can do
anything."

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jorts
I like this article, although I think that some people have a higher tendency
to be a leader. Based on personal experience these are the types of people
that grew up being able to manage their peers. This transcends into the
workplace. These types of people still will need the same sort of education as
described in this article, it just may come more naturally to them.
Regardless, I think that being a good manager/CEO is a skill that can be
acquired much like any other skill with studying and practice.

~~~
skyebook
I think that regardless of tendencies, some of the most inspiring and
successful people (on any path in life) have been those who are authentic and
comfortable with themselves.

That said, the world seems to have a real deficit of sincere and authentic
leaders.

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001sky
There is an element of 'Become great, and then just do what comes naturally'
here, though. Its both insightful and somewhat problematic, in the sense that
inauthenticity is a red-flag, but authentic != good, so the converse is not
true (not-inauthentic is not 'good', _per-se_ ).

TLDR: you need authentic (+) goodness, together.

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josephstalin
In my opinion, comrade, there are some "great" leaders who neither good nor
authentic.

~~~
001sky
Extra-ordinary (in the literal sense), perhaps is a better use of words.

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corporalagumbo
I really like this article. It reinforces my belief that the best companies
are run by genuinely good people with genuinely good intentions - in other
words, that the idea of business as dominated by sleaze and cynicism is either
a myth or a partial and declining truth.

The section "Nix multi-task listening" really struck a chord for me. It can be
challenging to really focus on listening to someone, especially if you have a
busy and easily-excited mind. But it is crucial to put the effort in. I've
seen people do some shocking things before - once I saw a friend say hi and
ask another friend how she was, then instantly, as the person began talking,
look down and start using her phone. Incredibly painful to watch someone start
to talk then just fade out as they realise the other person isn't even paying
attention. Needless to say, people like that better change their ways if they
want to be likable and successful.

~~~
jshen
You've got a non sequitur there. The best companies are run by good people,
therefore business isn't dominated by cynicism.

That conclusion can't be drawn from that premise, and the premise is shaky.

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polskibus
There are piles and piles written on this subject. Harvard Business Review is
just full of research and essays on it. Every now and then, an article like
this surfaces, a "case study" that is the result of survivorship bias - a
description of one or two people that succeeded, their "advice", and values.
What I think the community of entrepreneurs needs, is a more methodical
research and insights taken from much larger samples. See for example Roger
Martin's "Fixing the Game".

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agsamek
The article is good but touches secondary skills. Primary skill of CEO is
being able to define strategy and execute. In my opinion the most important
thing is to be able to model the environment (including outside and inside of
your business) and analyse it. Soft skills are more visible yet secondary.

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MikeHo
Great article, and great quote. I would definitely recommend reading the whole
book Winning by Jack Welch -- I personally just finished it. It provides great
insight to management and the behind-the-scenes look of GE at an executive
level.

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maked00
The last thing and skill that 99% of today's fascist corporate CEO's want to
do is practice leadership. Their main skill is the con. Conning their way into
their positions, and then using the resulting power to eliminate any potential
rivals. That is what 99% of today's CEO spend their time on. Talking about
leadership is kind of like salving their ego's to convince themselves they
provide any value at all to the social equation.

