
Why swearing is good for you - prostoalex
http://qz.com/749454/why-you-should-teach-your-children-profanity/
======
DHMO
Tossing wanker slag cheese eating surrender monkey bastards of daft cow
arsehole barmy chav dodgy gormless git of a manky mingers. Muppet naff nutter
pikey pillock plonker prat scrubber trollops uphill gardener twit knobheads.
Piss off you bell end lazy sod skiver knob wazzock ninny berk airy-fairy
ankle-biting arse-licker arsemonger chuffers, daft as a bush, dead from the
neck up, gannet, gone to the dogs ligger like a dog with two dicks, mad as a
bag of ferrets maggots who only bugger plug-ugly mingebags not batting on a
full wicket.

~~~
keyboardhitter
I tried to translate this to American slang, and failed miserably.

Thank you, I laughed so hard

~~~
omginternets
Ah, don't be so rough on the USA. We've got some colorful expressions of our
own, especially in places like NYC, Texas and Philly.

Now let me clear my throat and switch to French:

Va te faire foutre grosse pute. Je te pisses à la raie [<\- my personal
favorite], sous-merde. Grosse cochonne. Enculé de pédé de sa mère la pute. Je
t'emmerde. Je te nique ta race vieille pédale, nom de dieu de putain de bordel
de merde de saloperie de connard d'enculé de ta mère la chienne. T'es con
comme un manche, tu pues du cul et ta mère suce comme un aspirateur. Cuve à
foutre! Vieille trousse à bite! Je te chies dans l'œsophage! Enfant de viol!
Quand ta mère est sorti des chiottes, elle était avec toi! Et appelle-la, que
je recommences, tiens! Connard.

~~~
baku-fr
"T'es con comme un manche, tu pues du cul et ta mère suce comme un
aspirateur."

Frenchie here, that one got me giggling, well played.

~~~
grkvlt
"You're an idiot as a handle, you stink ass and your mother sucks like a
vacuum cleaner."

Apparently. However, "You're an idiot as a handle!" may well become my go-to
insult...

~~~
omginternets
Yeah it's a weird one. Why a broom-handle? Nobody knows. Doesn't matter.

"Con comme un manche" is stronger than "idiot like a handle" might first seem.
_Bête_ is _idiot_ whereas _con_ is etymologically equivalent to _cunt_.
Semantically, however, it conveys something closer to _fucking retard_.
"Asshat", maybe? Too funny. There's nothing funny about having to deal with a
_con_.

Edit: tangentially related, but [0] this prank call is pure comedy and
swearing gold. If you speak French and you haven't seen it, you're missing
out. If you don't speak French, you get to hear a Corsican accent and
Mediterranean rage (starts around 1:25). 10/10.

[0] [https://youtu.be/RaNFPcZc9pY](https://youtu.be/RaNFPcZc9pY)

~~~
grkvlt
Unfortunately, I don't speak French, so I wondered whether there was a
translation of the video. As it turns out, YouTube has automatic sub-titling,
and even automatic _translation_ of sub-titles, from French into various
languages - fortunately including English. But the text it produced, while
entertaining in its own Dadaist way, was obscure and unhelpful. I guess
machine translation still has a ways to go, particularly when dealing with
enraged Corsicans!

~~~
omginternets
Haha there's no way you can subtitle Corsicans!

I think this will, unfortunately, remain comprehensible only to Frenchman!

------
klenwell
Indeed, swearing may literally be good for your health -- as an outlet for
stress. In _Why Zebras Don 't Get Ulcers_, Robert Sapolsky writes:

 _We humans also deal better with stressors when we have outlets for
frustration--punch a wall, take a run, find solace in a hobby..._

 _A variant of Weiss 's experiment uncovers a special feature of the outlet-
for-frustration reaction. This time, when the rat gets the identical series of
electric shocks and is upset, it can run across the cage, sit next to another
rat and... bite the hell out of it. Stress-induced displacement of aggression:
the practice works wonders at minimizing the stressfulness of a stressor. It's
a real primate specialty as well. A male baboon loses a fight. Frustrated, he
spins around and attacks a subordinate male who was minding his own business.
An extremely high percentage of primate aggression represent frustration
displaced onto innocent bystanders._

In that light, swearing might be seen as a more civilized form of displacing
stress-induced aggression.

Edit: Also, what (the aptly monikered) @justratsinacoat said:
[https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=12229408](https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=12229408)

------
siliconc0w
Valorizing language is silly. I remember in like 5th grade they moved the goal
posts on us and made 'sucks' a 'bad word'. I was so thoroughly confused. How
did a previously okay word become bad?

They're tools in a box. They aren't inherently good or bad - the intent and
meaning created by them are what matters.

I similarly think it should be impossible for a word to offend someone. I
think it's possible for meaning to offend and really only if you respect the
person enough to provide some weight to that meaning.

~~~
whynaut
> I similarly think it should be impossible for a word to offend someone. I
> think it's possible for meaning to offend and really only if you respect the
> person enough to provide some weight to that meaning.

This strikes me as curious, as offense is a feeling, and thus not much
"thinking" must be involved. If by 'should be impossible' you mean everyone
should not _allow_ themselves to be offended, that is a very different thing
(and certainly requires first finding oneself offended, and then thinking
about it).

~~~
mistaken
I agree; bad words are bad because they have a negative feeling or concept
associated with them (fear, disgust, racism etc..). They work on an emotional
level, so you must make a conscious decision not to become offended even if
the intent behind the words weren't hostile towards you.

~~~
wastedhours
Exactly. If I called a mate a "daft c!!t" (censored mainly because people
still put that word, strangely, on a pedestal - if you do, I'd suggest not
going to a bar in London on a Friday night...), it has a totally different
concept to it than if I called a stranger who said something silly a "daft
c!!t". Fundamentally it boils down to an empathy with context - everyone has a
right to be offended by anything, but realistically the only time that has any
impact societally is if someone is directly _trying_ to offend you (which is
rarely the case).

------
justratsinacoat
>While sometimes viewed as lazy or boorish, swearing actually requires
substantial verbal facility and skill. When used correctly, in other words,
profanity is expressively complicated

I'm glad they pointed this out -- as I always say, swearing is the inevitable
linguistic crutch of the inarticulate motherfucker. However, this article
missed out on one of the more important beneficial aspects of swearing, namely
pain relief [1] (I could have linked a study or two, but they can be found in
the wiki article for once, and this is more concise). Of course, as interested
parties will learn, its analgesic effect is most prominent in those who rarely
swear, so, not that personally useful.

[1]
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hypoalgesic_effect_of_swearing](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hypoalgesic_effect_of_swearing)

~~~
Immortalin
Is this comment considered as sarcastic or ironic? To be specific, the
"inarticulate m __ __ __ __ __* " bit.

~~~
Cthulhu_
I'm pretty sure s/he said "motherfucker". No need to censor swear words /
insults, we're adults here, we can use mature language.

------
mhurron
I find it funny an article on swearing is going to be discussed on a site
where the general users will deride you and hold you as unprofessional for
swearing on it.

Perhaps we should have an article on the healing power of humour next.

~~~
Qantourisc
We could test the bullshit assumption right here.

~~~
Qantourisc
Well this comment wasn't down-voted, so it IS possible to swear. (When
appropriate of course)

------
joslin01
Swearing is like putting a spice on your sentence. Overdo it and you'll come
across too bold and brash. Use is carelessly for anything and it loses its
significance. But use it just on things that deserve emphasis, and it shines
in a pretty good way.

~~~
bhrgunatha
Stephen Fry, whose intellect and vocabulary are way beyond mine, on swearing.
The bleeping on the second video is so deliciously germane.

[1]
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s_osQvkeNRM](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s_osQvkeNRM)

[2]
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QZ0Ny6WhfLU](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QZ0Ny6WhfLU)

~~~
styluss
I thought you were going to post a segment from
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fry%27s_Planet_Word](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fry%27s_Planet_Word)
wherein there is a part where there is a test on resisting physical pain
between Brian Blessed and Stephen Fry. The point is people who swear a lot
seem to have a lower pain threshold.

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FuckOffNeemo
My username checks out.

Fuckin' oath swearing is good for you.

I'm British, raised by an ex-military Grandfather turned Civvy Engineer who
ate his cornflakes with a side of profanity and then I. As a young adult, I
moved to Australia. I swear alot. Even for fucking Australians.

It's the perfect stress release mechanism.

'Why the fuck doesn't that work? Why the fuck DOES that work?'

~~~
vacri
Well, 'fuck' is a linguistic universal joint - it's probably the most flexible
word in the language.

~~~
dsfyu404ed
Coincidentally, it gets used a lot when interacting with literal universal
joints:

Joint makes noise..."fuck"

Needle bearings get ground to dust..."fuck"

Clips won't come out..."fuck"

Cap is stuck in the yoke..."fuck"

Stuck cap explodes when you get it un-stuck..."fuck"

Yoke is bent while removing cap..."fuck"

New joint didn't come with clips..."fuck"

Clips that were laying around won't fit..."fuck"

Cap falls off when you don't want it to..."fuck"

Needle bearings come out during assembly..."fuck"

Joint + yokes exceed max operating angle near their max torque load... _BANG_
"fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck" _BANG,BANG,BANG,BANG,BANG,BANG,_
"FUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!

------
ue_
Earlier today I realised that I had forgotten a train ticket (along with other
documents) in a restaurant, so I ended up missing my train because I had to go
back and collect my documents.

As soon as I realised this was the case, I knew it was too late for me. In the
spur of the moment, I shouted "fuck!" and people were looking at me. It felt
so right at the time, as if I deserved to swear. My mind had been assailed by
my senses.

Many of the situations in which we want to swear can be counteracted by
mindfulness of the phenomena surrounding you. When you remember not to get
caught up in your internal world of judgements, and remember to guard your
senses (including the mind as one of our senses) then swearing becomes a lot
less necessary to deal with a situation.

Ideally we'd like to not have to deal with situations, because the whole
mental component of the situation is missing. Mindfulness gets us there,
whereas swearing does not.

~~~
Cthulhu_
I like to think a bit before swearing at work, so instead of going "it's shit"
like ol' Steve did, I prefer "it's suboptimal" or "there's room for
improvement". But in a sarcastic tone, which makes it funny. I hope.

------
sofaofthedamned
I love a good swear as much of any of you mangy pissflaps, but here's a gold
example of how implied rudeness can be funny too.

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6AXPnH0C9UA](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6AXPnH0C9UA)

------
kbouck
If you like filthy British humour and want to add to your swearing vocabulary,
get the original Roger's Profanisaurus [1].

There are newer editions with more words added, but the original edition has
the highest concentration of funny, in my opinion. If you get/have the
hardcover edition, look for the easter egg under the back cover.

[1] [https://www.amazon.com/Rogers-Profanisaurus-
Viz/dp/075221507...](https://www.amazon.com/Rogers-Profanisaurus-
Viz/dp/0752215078/)

------
e40
Meh. I swear. In front of my son (now 15). A lot. I was hoping for better
arguments for feeling good about my swearing.

~~~
jfoutz
This comment, necessarily, has coarse language.

When i first started programming i worked with a guy who retired about a year
later, Jon. He swore constantly, and was extremely colorful in his mastery of
that particular skill.

One day I asked Jon about it, he told me a story from when he was much
younger. He was leaving the house for work, with the suit and briefcase and
everything, his son was 5 or 6 and had slept in. Jon is at the car door, his
son comes running out to say goodbye to his daddy. So it's this perfect late
60's early 70's scene, practically a rockwell painting. Dad in a suit, mom in
an apron, son in pajamas. Jon's off to continue the space age, with computers.

Jon's son stands on the porch and hollers "Goodbye cocksucker!"

I know i don't do justice to that story, i was practically in tears when he
told me. Anyway, he spoke a bit about humor in the face of stress, how it can
bring joy in the darkest situations.

He absolutely would not be tolerated these days, but i liked the guy. He was
genuinely funny. His swearing was so shocking it cut through your defenses,
and more or less forced a laugh. Anyway, i'd encourage you to flavor your
swears with ridiculous overly specific additions. That guy's not a shit, he's
a steaming hairy flaming pile of whale shit. I don't have Jon's gift. But you
get the idea. Chevy Chase in christmas vacation is a great example.

~~~
vacri
This is what gets me with some 'anti-swearers' though - the concern is on the
taboo word, not the taboo intent. "A steaming hairy flaming pile of whale's
_leavings_ " is not swearing, but is saying exactly the same thing. Same
intent, but not with the taboo word, though.

~~~
jfoutz
Well, i don't really know. There are some bible verses that call out the use
of filthy language and corrupt words. I think shit was actually the english
word for feces, and got a bad rap over time. Perhaps as technology improved,
more and more people didn't have to actually deal with shit and wanted a more
high falutin term.

I think there's some value in limiting use of words. Why would you call
someone whale leavings? Maybe he cut you off in traffic? Maybe he killed your
dog? It can lead to lazy storytelling. As others mentioned, they're like
seasoning. They should be used to add weight to a coherent idea, not as a
substitute for thought.

------
gotchange
A whole article dedicated to exploring the apparent benefits of swearing and
not a single mention of its perceived cathartic effects?

I'm a bit disappointed to say the least. Anyhow, yeah swearing can help
alleviate internal pain or stress for some people but you should use with
moderation as it follows the law of diminishing returns and when you go
overboard with it, it becomes increasingly useless.

\----------------------------------------------------

“Bad words,” Adams writes, “are unexpectedly useful in fostering human
relations because they carry risk….We like to get away with things and
sometimes we do so with like-minded people.”

Anyone have any idea what is this guy talking about?

I read this part many times but I couldn't get the "romantic" view that he
holds for profanity and obscenities.

------
sprucely
For those who are not very creative with their expletives, there are plenty of
resources out there. A quick search led me to this...
[http://foulomatic.hnldesign.nl/](http://foulomatic.hnldesign.nl/)

------
amelius
The problem is that swearing is losing its strength, since everybody already
uses interjects like "f __* it " and "wtf" all the time.

~~~
dingaling
And very often they've no idea that they're swearing. 'Oh My God' was insanely
popular in the 1990s even amongst people who had no belief in a deity, which
really annoyed me even though I don't identify as a Christian.

I even remember the non-Human character Kira in _Deep Space 9_ being assigned
it in dialogue, it was really jarring. It's as if it had just been reduced to
a sequence of syllables and the writers didn't think about what it _meant_.

~~~
coldtea
> _' Oh My God' was insanely popular in the 1990s even amongst people who had
> no belief in a deity, which really annoyed me even though I don't identify
> as a Christian_

OMG is not a swear word though -- it's just an expression of
awe/amazement/surprise/etc.

~~~
danellis
It's an oath, isn't it? So literally, at least, it is swearing.

~~~
coldtea
[http://images-cdn.9gag.com/photo/a5PmrLq_700b.jpg](http://images-
cdn.9gag.com/photo/a5PmrLq_700b.jpg)

(Or that would be, if it even was an oath. But "Oh my god" is NOT an oath. "On
my God", or "In the name of my god" would be that).

~~~
danellis
Oh, really? I thought it was the "_my_ God" part that was swearing an oath.

~~~
coldtea
Not every phrase with "my god" in it is an oath.

Unless if you swear (promise to do something) to your god (or on your god's
name).

OMG is not that different from "oh man!" in use. It's for surprise. How does
"swearing an oath" would be related to being surprised?

~~~
danellis
I see "Oh, _my_ God" as a statement of allegiance, as opposed to just, say,
"Oh, God."

~~~
coldtea
I see. I see it more as kind of call (in a "vocative case").

In the sense that you find something surprising, and ask for your God (as when
you fear something, etc).

------
auganov
It's a valid argument but in the big scheme of things it doesn't convince me.
The same argument can be made for a wide array of things that are considered
undesirable like, say, xenophobia [0].

I have definitely never sworn in my native language, I might have used a soft
swear word in English in text a few times just due to my ignorance.

[0] Of course I recognize that xenophobia has more of a concrete "victim".

------
xufi
This article reminds me of [http://www.bbc.com/culture/story/20151109-english-
speakers-o...](http://www.bbc.com/culture/story/20151109-english-speakers-or-
not-brits-and-americans-swear-in-different-languages) Its funny how
colloquiasm also applies to swearing in one languages v.s another

------
Tharkun
What a load of crap. It's good because it carries 'risk' and can be used as a
sign of trust? In what universe does swearing carry 'risk'? Might a puritan
cultural thing. In which case the 'benefits' probably don't carry over to less
puritan cultures.

------
KenM
Vulgarity is the fool's fig leaf.

------
lucian2k
Fuck yeah!

------
ufmace
Ah, fuck this bullshit. :D

