

Ask HN: Should I tell my boss/employer I have depression? - throwaway580

I have depression and will be looking for jobs soon. I wanted to see HN&#x27;s thoughts on what would be the right etiquette here.
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bonemachine
A million times "no."

There is essentially zero chance that the potential employer will be in a
frame of mind to evaluate your situation with anything resembling the degree
of compassion or understanding you're looking for.

If anything they'll be hyper-attuned towards filtering out against: (1)
unknowns and (2) risk. Your situation screams both (1)+(2), at very high
volume. And even if they do hire you, most likely they'll have you in a "box"
mentally, and see you as someone with high flight risk / limited growth
potential.

As an alternative... perhaps you can see your next job as a an "escape" form
your emotional condition. Perhaps as a kind of a role-playing game as it were.
As in:

 _I 'm just here for the paycheck, the routine, and the stability. I don't
need these people as an emotional support network. Also, I'm confident enough
that I can put on a different "hat" for 8 hours a day. Then deal with my
internal situation in my spare time, on my own terms._

Also, you might be pleasantly surprise at what the change in scenery and daily
routine does for your internal state. There's a lot[1] of neurophysiological
research being done of late to the effect that putting ourselves "through the
motions", e.g. smiling at others, being kind and helpful to them; and, when
they ask that dreaded question -- "How are you?" \-- answering with: "Nice of
you to ask! I'm great! How are you!" even though we know they don't really
mean it -- that these kinds of habits actually do end up, over time,
influencing one's internal state in a positive way.

[1] no references handy -- but I'm pretty sure I've seen quite a few; and it
fits my observations of my own mental state and of that of others close to me
in this life, generally.

~~~
Peroni
Whilst I agree entirely in the context of _potential_ employers, I don't
necessarily agree in the context of your current employer.

The entire topic of depression in tech is something that needs infinitely more
publicity and support than it currently gets.

If you want to see an absolutely phenomenal talk on Developers & Depression
then I couldn't recommend this highly enough:
[http://programme2013.scottishrubyconference.com/proposals/86...](http://programme2013.scottishrubyconference.com/proposals/86/video)

~~~
bonemachine
Agreed, current employer = very different scenario.

The original question seemed to refer to potential employers, so that's what I
was addressing.

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cgtyoder
No. Don't bring up any medical history or conditions. It sounds like you're
implying this may affect your job performance and you want to be "nice" to
your employer, but they don't have any right to this information. Just do your
job to the best of your ability, and deal with the depression in a responsible
way as it occurs. You are not a "bad person" for being depressed, just as a
person who has an appendectomy or cancer is not a bad person for missing work
because of their medical condition.

And, the employer may not like you bringing it up either - if they decide to
fire/not hire you, then you have opened (a slight crack of) a door which might
allow them to be easily sued, if they in any way they hint it was because of
medical conditions. You will be being kind to them by not putting them in this
tenuous legal position.

------
schnaars
At the beginning of 2007, my wife was diagnosed with cancer. At the end of the
year, I left my company and was looking for a new job. Good healthcare was
critical to me and my family, so it was naturally one of the things that I
asked about early on during the interview process. Beyond good insurance, I
was also very clear that, while her illness wouldn't impact my performance,
there are going to be unique situations where I was going to have to leave or
not show up and was that acceptable?

I opted to be really transparent about it because a.) I didn't want it to be a
surprise when I texted in the middle of the night that I wasn't able to make
it in to the office and b.) I wanted to work for someone that would be
supportive when things went sideways. I was lucky and found a great person to
work for who became a very good friend.

There are enough people today that either deal with depression personally or
know someone that deals with depression on some level or another. If I was
hiring you, I'd want to know about it upfront. I've always told my employees
that I can deal with bad news, but I hate surprises.

I'd own it and I'd explain how you handle it and how it won't impact your
performance and this is why. I'd be pretty impressed with someone coming to me
saying BTW, I've got this issue, but let me show you how I handle it and
assure you that it won't be an issue if I work for you.

------
DanBC
By declaring you get protection under the US laws:

([http://www.dol.gov/odep/pubs/fact/laws.htm](http://www.dol.gov/odep/pubs/fact/laws.htm))

> _The Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) prohibits discrimination against
> people with disabilities and guarantees equal opportunities for individuals
> with disabilities in employment, transportation, public accommodations,
> state and local government services, and telecommunications. Two sections of
> the ADA relate to employment:_

> _Title I: Employment prohibits covered employers from discriminating against
> people with disabilities in all employment-related activities, including
> hiring, pay, benefits, firingand promotions. Covered employers include
> private businesses, educational institutions, employment agencies, labor
> organizations, and state and local government entities with 15 or more
> employees._

([http://www.eeoc.gov/laws/types/disability.cfm](http://www.eeoc.gov/laws/types/disability.cfm))

> _The law requires an employer to provide reasonable accommodation to an
> employee or job applicant with a disability, unless doing so would cause
> significant difficulty or expense for the employer ( "undue hardship")._

[...]

> _The law places strict limits on employers when it comes to asking job
> applicants to answer medical questions, take a medical exam, or identify a
> disability._

> _For example, an employer may not ask a job applicant to answer medical
> questions or take a medical exam before extending a job offer. An employer
> also may not ask job applicants if they have a disability (or about the
> nature of an obvious disability). An employer may ask job applicants whether
> they can perform the job and how they would perform the job, with or without
> a reasonable accommodation._

------
DanBC
Some countries give you legal protection.

[http://www.mind.org.uk/mental_health_a-z/8069_disability_dis...](http://www.mind.org.uk/mental_health_a-z/8069_disability_discrimination)

You might want to say something like "many people suffer mental health
problems of various severities. I'm one of those people, but I'm aware of my
mental health and I know where to go and what to do if I feel it's slipping".
(If that's true.)

[http://www.kent.ac.uk/careers/disabled.htm](http://www.kent.ac.uk/careers/disabled.htm)

> _It is not compulsory for job applicants to disclose a disability: under the
> Equality Act 2010 it is, in most situations, illegal for employers to ask
> about health and disability issues when recruiting until a job offer has
> actually been made. Whether you choose to declare a disability before this
> point is therefore entirely up to you. However, there are some good reasons
> for telling a potential employer about a disability_

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chudi
No, dont do it, if you can work its ok, its not your job to judge if you are
capable on a job, its your boss job.

A tip for the interviews, check this video
[http://www.ted.com/talks/amy_cuddy_your_body_language_shapes...](http://www.ted.com/talks/amy_cuddy_your_body_language_shapes_who_you_are.html)
it may help you :D

------
runjake
No no no no no. I'm hard-pressed to think of an instance where this would be
in your interests to tell them anything. If it's a "coming out" kind of thing,
save it for family, friends, or a priest.

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joombar
Generally, no. But you might consider telling them to establish a desirable
workplace filter. Would you want to work for the company that wouldn't hire
you based on this information?

------
meerita
Absolutely.

If they're a good company and your boss is not a bastard he will propose you
stuff to make you feel better.

