
Ask HN: What do you after bad day? - stoopidood
Founder here of reasonably successful company curious to hear the advice of others. Of course, creating a startup is an exercise in letdowns. It takes 100 &quot;no&quot;s to get to every &quot;yes&quot;. I&#x27;m familiar with that.<p>I&#x27;m not depressed or someone to worry about, but earlier today lost a deal that was important.<p>I&#x27;m curious how others deal with big let downs. Part of me wants to take a break and go get drinks with friends, part of me wants to double down and work late into the night, part of me just wants to lay on the couch and sleep.<p>Just a bad day and curious how others deal with it. Cheers.
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australis
This is more applicable for a "normal" type of bad day that might occur a bit
more frequently, rather than something on a much larger scale like what was
experienced above.

If you have something planned after work (or later in the day), but because of
your "bad day" you don't feel motivated to do it when the time arises, it's
important to _still do it_. It could be anything from working on a side
project, doing some exercise, cooking a nice elaborate meal, etc.

If you don't then will suffer two blows: (a) have a bad day, and (b) not
enrich your day by doing what you had planned.

e.g. Your plan might have been to do some exercise, but you get home, feel
like crap and decide to have a few beers to help yourself feel better. Or you
planned on cooking something nice, but feel like getting takeaway instead.

Sure, sometimes you might need to concede (especially for a big let down). But
it should not become the norm.

Furthermore, if by doing your planned after-work activity you manage to
overcome the negative vibe from your bad day, you're more likely to go to bed
feeling better about yourself, what you have achieved lately, and be more
optimistic about what lies ahead tomorrow (and how to deal with it).

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smutton
I usually look at where I am and be grateful, regardless of a great
disappointment. The optimized approach here is the find what will change your
mindset the most and since working may motivate you for a bit, it won't really
change your mindset.

A break is good and probably optimable since alcohol and friends will change
the scene and definitely change your mindset (as long as you don't bring it
up).

Regardless, we always fear of being back where we started - disappointment.
Sometimes it's like a date with someone promising that went wrong. There's
tons of things you could have done, but she or he didn't want to go on - it
doesn't make it your fault, nor the other person's. Sometimes it's just not
meant to be, perhaps for the better.

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hardmath123
Music! Build playlists that help you get through tough times. My personal
favorites are classic rock like _Stairway to Heaven_ ("If there's a bustle in
your hedgegrow, don't be alarmed now / It's just a spring clean for the May
queen"), Bach (in particular, WTC pieces), and instrumental jazz (Miles Davis
is really uplifting). Find songs where the lyrics mean something special to
you, and listen to them. Sometimes it helps you look at the big picture, and
sometimes it makes you feel like you're not alone. Either way, it's uplifting.
:-)

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bzalasky
I like to buy a quality cut of meat or fish, and seasonal produce, with a
couple of recipes in mind. Then I spend the next hour or so (depending on the
recipes) preparing and cooking a delicious meal. Cutting vegetables. Trimming
meat. Making a fricassee (or learning that it's between a sauté and a stew).
Broiling. Frying. It's all more visceral than my day to day work. It let's me
empty my mind and focus on creating something that I will enjoy that evening,
without worrying about tomorrows or next weeks.

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attilagyongyosi
Other comments cover it well, all highly recommended ways to deal with a bad
day I think.

What I would personally do is sit down and clear my mind for 10 or 20 minutes.
Meditate, breathe slowly and deeply. Let your thoughts race and get out of
your mind. Think of all the things you have achieved, all the great people in
your life. Let that remind you that it is "just" a lost deal.

Then, go out and drink a few with the guys.

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philiphodgen
If I have had a stressful day, I go run a 5K loop around the Rose Bowl. If I
had a good day, I do the same thing. "Meh" days, the same.

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joeclark77
I find that on a bad day I spend more time with the kids. Take them out for a
trike ride before sunset, let them spend more time playing in the bath, watch
a DVD with them before bedtime. I suppose I'm unconsciously compensating to
make sure I don't spread my bad moods to them.

I guess this strategy will have to evolve when they're teenagers and they
become the _source_ of my bad moods.

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dome82
Be kind. Smile. Be grateful for the life I have. Make a donation on Watsi.

Life can be beautiful, even in dark days.

Stay positive!

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arisAlexis
run 5 miles, clears up the head. Then have a hot bath and a wonderful dinner.
Call my best friend. simple things

