
Ask HN: How did you deal with depression? - welldepressedaf
I am starting to get a little bit hopeless on this one. Once I had passions and stuff I wanted to do, I learnt enough JS to build a small app that has proven to be incredibly useful for my family. Then came university and almost all my passions have gone, I am a good student but as of lately I have been struggling with the courses I liked in the past.<p>Nothing excited me anymore, and not that I am sad. I still can crack a joke I still can smile but nothing seems to make me happy anymore. I think I might have depression. I play games and procrastinate all day and it doesn&#x27;t make me feel any good it is just a getaway.<p>Sadly I live in a 3rd world country, where mental illness is not an illness. I can get little help from people. Our healthcare system simply doesn&#x27;t work at all. So HN crowd, how do you deal with these feelings?
======
throw_away_555
This won't get a lot of votes, but it ended up as diet and exercise for me.

When I dropped caffeine and alcohol my anxiety went away. When I exercised my
depression went away.

I tried a lot of things, but it ended up figuring out that I wasn't eating
well or working out.

Now I do crossfit. I know, I know. It's a cult blah blah. But go try it. You
need to be exercising every day to get all that endorphin goodness and plus,
you meet a lot of fun people at crossfit. The community keeps me coming back.
I don't get that biking (which I love) so I don't do it as much as crossfit.
And I hate running. The key is to keep doing it, and that social component
works magic. If you can work out at a home gym every day - good for you - but
I lose interest and stop, then I get fat and lazy and depressed again.

As for food, I'm not a fan of cooking. But I found paleo then keto. And I
avoid all the stuff you're told to eat. "healthy" grains, for example. I don't
drink coke. Basically avoid all sugar. I'm basically paleo to paleo-keto end
of the spectrum.

I really didn't think it would work but there it is.

~~~
jawilson2
I second this. I started keto and my depression went away, and although there
is still anxiety, it is much lower, and it feels like I can DEAL with it,
whereas before I felt helpless.

I was a neurology professor at a children's hospital in my previous job, and
there is a ton of research being done studying the neurological effects of a
low-carb diet, and they are, across the board, incredible. A common treatment
for kids with epilepsy is the keto diet, so we had a lot of research and
expertise in this area. Half of the department was on the diet, and I have
been for close to two years now. I will never stop it. My wife and kids as
well (though the kids are more paleo, since they have closer to 75-100 g
carbs/day)

~~~
throwaway129
can you talk about what a typical keto diet is like? what foods does someone
on a keto diet eat?

------
AndrewMock
1\. Get medicated.

2\. Set one small baby-step goal each day. (set an appointment today, etc.)
Change the goal every time.

3\. Change your environment. Move cities or schools if need be.

4\. Exercise. Start with one rep on day 1, two reps on day 2, etc. Baby steps.

5\. Ask for feedback on stuff. Any positive feedback helps motivate you to
learn and do more projects.

6\. Seek a healthy relationship.

7\. Be vulnerable. Let somebody else that cares about you know of your state.

8\. Be spiritually-curious. I'm christian and that inspires a lot.

9\. Realize when your "objective observations" are not objective. Don't be
blindsided by emotion.

10\. Vent your emotion in a healthy and controlled way.

11\. Write one sentence about your week every week. Again, baby steps.

12\. Never do drugs. This just amplifies your problems.

13\. This includes no smoking.

14\. If you make lists and spreedsheets, track the frequency you leave the
house.

15\. Make alarms on your phone.

16\. Volunteer once a week.

These are mostly based on experience and personal observations.

~~~
0tiger1
Sure, you shouldn't rush to get medicated, but you should be open to
medication as an option. I believe depression is often chemically caused, and
if you've tried healthy living, meditation, etc., there are many good,
relatively benign, well tested medical options out there.

~~~
TeMPOraL
Indeed. Medication are not silver bullets and usually won't solve problems
alone, but a right pill may be just what's needed to enable you to deal with
the problems. Personally, I'm on SSRIs and (despite getting a common side
effect) I'm very happy with them - even though I still suffer from depression
symptoms, they're nowhere near the level I had before getting those pills,
which pretty much restored my ability to hold my head above water.

------
zamalek
It was hard at times: when you hit a slump you want to stay in that slump - it
was hard fighting my way out, but it can be done.

"Stop and smell the roses." Take the time to notice the beauty in things
around you: both nature and concrete. I'm talking about the most sublime
things. I first noticed it one night when I was driving home - the lights were
reflecting off this dirty little dam of no significance, but for some reason I
noticed it and for some reason it was beautiful. For a very long time after
that I would make a point of noticing that little spot every day on the way
home. Out of that habit I then started noticing more and more things. When you
become depressed use that happy place as an anchor and hold onto it.

I realized that I used to think the same way as a kid: everything in the world
was wondrous and happy - I think everyone forgets how to see the world that
way. Re-learn that mindset.

Be very respectful toward alcohol, cannabis and caffeine. Too much of any will
set you back.

Finally, something like 80% of the human race has a 5-MTHF deficiency (for
genetic reasons, Google it). It presents as vitamin B deficiency and is
therefore often misdiagnosed as depression and some learning disabilities
(including trouble concentrating). If you can't get it from a chemist (I
can't, 3rd world too) check herbal/homeopathy stores (which is how I get it).
Speak to your doctor before taking it and ask for advice, you'll need to take
it for quite a while before you start noticing a difference - 2 to 4 weeks at
least.

Believe in yourself because I believe in you, I know you can do it. If at all
possible get meds.

~~~
Tossrock
What a bunch of hooey. Just 'deciding to be happy' is nonsense for someone
with major depressive disorder (the medically accepted name of the disorder,
as opposed to the term 'clinical depression', which people without experience
tend to use...) I'm glad things worked out for you but this is not helpful
advice for someone who is actually depressed. It's like telling someone who's
short to just decide to be taller.

~~~
zamalek
I guess you're right. I'll just remove that one paragraph. If you are at a
doctor you are more than welcome to weigh in on the 2 opinions I had at 10
after being bullied for 3 years. I might not be able to remember all the
terminology, but I do remember not being able to get out of it. I do remember
not being able to have more than 1 friend up until I was 20. I do remember
drinking myself into a pit at 22 (2 six packs a night, alone for a year, sound
healthy?). I do remember digging myself out of it, alone, without help.
Because for some reason I can't explain I started believing that I could. I am
now happy. The only thing I have left is excruciating existential anxiety, can
I beat that too? Fuck yeah.

Bunch of hooey, though.

I can tell you one thing: OP isn't going to win by believing it's impossible
because even the best meds only provide symptomatic relief. They don't fix the
underlying problem. It's like giving a short person a mirror that makes them
look taller. Meds can help you win, meds are good. I would never recommend
someone to avoid them. All irrelevant: OP indicated depression is not an
illness in his country. He/she supposedly can't see a doctor. No meds. All
that's left is will power.

Knowing someone else did it makes all the difference.

Finally, as an expert on the matter, where is your advice? Or are you here
tear OP down? I _know_ OP can do it, all you know is what a major depressive
disorder is.

~~~
TeMPOraL
I don't think you really should have removed that paragraph :). Yes, it jumped
on me too, but after thinking about it for a second, I actually appreciated
it. I've never been able to think myself out of something like you did, but I
found it reassuring. I actually envy you that skill; myself I was also
drinking myself every night for almost a year; at some point I run out of
money for cheap beers, stopped drinking, realized that I like being sober and
never returned to the habit. So in my case this seems more like random walk
around the potential gradient, with hope that at some point I'll accidentally
escape the local minimum.

If you have any tips about "excruciating existential anxiety" (of which I've
been suffering for half the decade already, recently successfully moderated by
SSRIs) I'd be more than glad to hear them. Right now the only coping strategy
I have is to ignore it, but it interferes with my ability to concentrate and
plan for the future - I'm literally unable to plan for more than a week-two in
advance without getting serious emotional pains.

~~~
zamalek
> If you have any tips about "excruciating existential anxiety"

I've found that the more I think about it the worse it gets - which makes
sense: it's habit-forming. Try this:

1\. Stay on the SSRIs - they can help you learn how to break the habit.

2\. Pick a "safe topic." It doesn't have to be interesting (although that
probably helps), but should just have a good chance of _not_ leading to
existential issues.

3\. Next time you start thinking about existential issues, start thinking
about your topic instead.

I have no idea if it works in the long-run but it's what I am doing right now.
I'm not sure if the underlying cause for the anxiety will ever go away, but if
I can habitually stop thinking about it then it might as well no longer be
there.

Also, it's usually worst when I am trying to go to sleep. I put on YouTube
with brain-numbing content face-down next to my pillow: nothing stimulating
(interesting or humorous).

------
bit2mask
One time I got on to a bus and sat in front of an old gentleman who kept
looking up at me occasionally. When he got off the bus and walked passed me he
said: "Whatever it is, don't let it beat you kid.". I must have looked
physically wrecked that day. Ever since then those words have stayed with me.

Chin up, OP.

------
andriesm
I've battled a life-time of depression and ADHD and here is what I've learned.

You need to engineer your entire life to suite your personality, life style
and mental shortcomings.

This takes time and trial and error.

Whenever a depression spell hits, I prepare myself for battle.

Sometimes I am as helpless as simply knowing there is not much else I can do
but wait a few weeks for it to pass, and aim to minimize the amount of long
term disruption to my life and goals.

Accepting it, accepting that at times you can be powerless and totally in the
grip of this beast, but also that it will definitely pass again.

Most depressive spells pass relatively quickly but I've had 1-2 year spells.

Yet today at 38, my life is happy, fulfilling, satisfying and challenging.

I also am prescribed medications for both my conditions, and I can say that if
you are on a med that doesn't work for you it is really bad, and when you are
on a med that accords well with your particular chemistry it's like a major
life turn-around. This involves trial and error with the best Psychiatrist you
can afford.

I sometimes do take breaks from my anti-depressant to effects, but on balance
I cannot imagine my life had I never discovered these meds.

Therapy has not been helpful to me overall. But spending a lot of time
learning emotional skills, re-evaluating beliefs and feelings, and getting
deeply in touch with what motivates me, what kills my motivation, what my
emotional needs are etc all helps a ton.

Feel free to email directly on andries dot malan at gmail dot com if you
looking for someone in tech entrepreneurship with plenty battle scars to share
experience with.

I wish you all the best - and wish to tell you that you can definitely learn
to find a happy and fulfilling life no matter how shit things look and feel
for you at the moment.

------
hemantv
Action seems to be best treatment. When I start doing things (yes I know its
lot difficult) I build a stair out of black cloud hanging over my head.

Look for easiest project you can do and steps you can do to make that project
work once that's done look for your next project. These small projects build
your stairs / steps to rise above dark cloud and see the daylight once again
:)

------
DanBC
You can try cognitive behaviour therapy. Ideally this would be face to face
with an experienced therapist. But if there are no therapists available you
can either do computer guided CBT or self guided from a book.

Moodgym is a respected website:
[https://moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome](https://moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome)

Mind Over Mood is a respected book.
[http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/0898621283/](http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/0898621283/)

If you've tried CBT and it's not working you may want to see a doctor and get
some meds.

------
rubicon33
I'm going to start with a fact that you likely won't want to hear: There is no
magic bullet. Non-situational depression is something you will wrestle with
your entire life. There is no cure, only treatments. That said, you can do a
lot to alleviate the symptoms. Ranked in order of importance:

1\. Sleep

Get good sleep. Research circadian rhythms, and try to understand your own
'sleep physiology'. Within the constraints of your work, try and sleep at
optimal times for YOU. For me, going to bed late, waking up late, is best. I
feel more rejuvenated on 4 hours of sleep within my 'sleep window' than I do
of 8 hours of sleep outside of it. Find what works for you.

2\. Intense, social, exercise.

Other's have mentioned cross fit, but boxing is great too. It has to be
INTENSE and there needs to be a SOCIAL component to keep you motivated. You
should leave your workout feeling completely destroyed. In my opinion, just
going to the gym doesn't work. You need to be part of a fitness community. The
social aspect, combined with the intense workout, can work wonders. Go
regularly.

3\. Diet.

Avoid junk food. Cut out hard drugs, obviously. Cook for yourself, if you can.

4\. Purpose.

Find something in life that excites you, and pursue it. Find a community of
people that are also interested in that and join that community. Contribute to
that community, whenever you can. Form relationships with others in that
community, as you pursue your passion.

\----

Discipline, and regularity, are vital to success. If you do these 4 things,
you'll find with time, that your depression weakens it's grip on you. Be
patient with point number 4. Don't be discouraged, if right now, you don't
have a calling, or a purpose. Let life happen, and go where the wind blows.

------
thaumaturgy
I make myself adhere to my usual daily habits as much as possible. Depression
makes it really attractive to lounge around all day. I try to get up and
shave, and shower, and dress even if I have nowhere to go. It usually happens
more slowly, but I also usually feel a little better afterward. I'm never
happy with myself if I forego those daily habits.

I try to sit outside a little bit if I can. There's a lot of evidence at this
point that exposure to sunlight in the morning is a good way to help improve
your sleep, which is a major component of depression. I never want to sit
outside, but I make myself do it anyway.

I try not to be too angry or upset with myself. To some extent, what I'm
experiencing is outside of my control. I'm sick, just as if I had the flu. So
I try to relax a little. Beating myself up never makes me feel better.

I try to remember something I used to enjoy, and I try to do that thing again,
only I try to take it easy. For example, reading: I never have enough time to
read anymore. I won't be in the mood for a novel, but maybe one of my old
Robert Asprin books would be nice.

I try not to let my diet get _too_ awful, but, like being sick, I give in a
little. I can't will myself into making three square meals a day, but I can
make one good meal a day and not eat my way through a brand new bag of
cookies.

I try to pick one little thing and finish it. Sometimes it's the laundry,
sometimes it's the dishes, sometimes it's yard work, sometimes it's the pantry
that's been under construction for a bit. I definitely don't pick anything
ambitious. I need a victory, so I go and find the smallest, easiest little
battle, and I win that one, and then tomorrow I'll look for another one, and
keep doing that until I feel better.

If it's really bad, I contact a friend. I don't have many friends, but there
is one that I can call whenever I'm in really bad shape, and he'll drop what
he's doing and come over and we'll talk and get ice cream and play cards or
something. (And I'll drop everything for him too.)

Those are a few of the things I do, anyway. Hope you find something there that
helps.

------
cpncrunch
It sounds like you might be burned out by university (depression is a symptom
of burnout).

Some suggestions that helped me and might work for you:

\- See whether there is anything in your life that might be causing the
burnout/depression. Do you have any emotional issues in your life (i.e.
something in your life causing anger/resentment)? Do you have excessive
stress/responsibilities? Are you doing what you really want to do with your
life?

\- Do more enjoyable, motivating, goal-oriented activities, both physical and
mental.

\- Get sufficient sleep.

\- Give up alcohol and caffeine, as well as any other psychoactive substances.

------
bcoughlan
For me it got to breaking point at my job. I quit and moved to a cheap country
for a few months. Ditched the laptop and smartphone and just relaxed,
exeecised, read and cooked. Diet and exercise played a huge part, but I
couldn't have got them in order while being depressed and stressed out. Being
stressed meant always taking on a bit more than I could unload, and that
feeling of being at max capacity constantly lead to neglecting day to day
tasks such as eating well, shaving, exercising, socialising. This feeds back
into the stress and it all can get out of control so quickly.

I'd like to say that's the end of the story but I ran out of money and moved
home and got another software job. At first I tried not to work too hard but
stress slowly accumulated again. Soon after I felt that deflated feeling in my
stomach every morning. I do yoga, run and cycle which is a huge help but it
goes through phases and is really the prevention, not the cure. I'm convinced
now that I need a radical permanent change to stop slipping into burnout and
depression. I love programming but 40 hours a week kills me. Your
circumstances may differ but its good to examine if prolonged stress is at the
core.

------
Const-me
A1. First, if you are from Russia — run ASAP. It will never get better. I did
4 years ago, never had anything resembling depression since that.

A2. If your country is OK (e.g. suicide rate there is less than 15 per 100000
people per year), I think you need to search for the intersection between
things you have passion for, and things that are paid well. After you will
find that intersection, I think you will get better. You see, when you was a
kid, just following your passion was enough for happiness. In the adult world,
however, you also need some financial independence for that.

A3. There are other things, like alcoholism or herbal medicine, but I
generally do not recommend those to young people.

------
yitchelle
Something I read in HN recently, maybe two months ago, resonate with me. It is
about having guaranteed small wins. It is something that I starting to apply
to most things that I do, and it has change the way I see things around me.

[https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=9782083](https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=9782083)

Also came across this list, the items about happiness are great suggestions.

[http://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifestyle/60-small-ways-
to-...](http://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifestyle/60-small-ways-to-improve-
your-life-in-the-next-100-days.html)

------
protomyth
If I read this right, your still in college and hitting the wall. Its fairly
normal as a lot of people turn get burnout during college.

The diet and exercise suggestions are probably the best. Taking some walks and
changing your daily scenery would probably help. Do you eat in the same place
everyday? Pick a random book from the library and read it. If there are campus
activities that seem interesting, go do them instead of playing games.

Don't freak out if your passion is missing for a while. Its just an ebb and
you need to recharge. You'll already shown inspiration, you need to let it
come back.

------
ankit1911
I have been dealing with thing since 8 years now. I have tried to escape this
with drugs/alcohol but that won't help. I can tell you everything that I've
done but that won't be of any help to you.

What I think is, there is no hard coded way to deal with this issue.
Understand your situation and keep fighting and there will come a time when
something will push you over the brink. Honestly, if you ask me I really don't
know what thing in particular helped me curb my depression, things started to
change over time.

However, eating healthy food, reading books and exercise is a must.

------
Smushman
I am family of a psychologist. This comes from latest research.

Usually skipped but most critical, is simple trace minerals and vitamins.

Our food is entirely missing so much in the current day, because the same
plots of land are farmed over and over (think 25-50 years for the same land).

Himalayan Sea Salt has the trace minerals, and supplementation with Vitamin D,
Magnesium, and B-12 have specifically helped mood and energy.

You can get blood tests for these levels, but even in cases where levels are
normal supplements have been shown to help.

------
miesman
I struggled with depression for YEARS. I tried everything I could find.
Exercise helped a lot. Coffee helped. Meditation helped. All of these things
worked but I was still in really down. Finely after years I decided what have
I got to lose and went on antidepressants.

It was the best thing I ever did. The world opened up for me. I was able to
make a lot of changes that were very healthy in my life. I finely had outside
interests other than work and sleep. It was like night and day.

------
dreyfiz
Exercise. Read "The best exercises for mental illnesses":
[http://www.thementalrunner.org/p/the-best-exercise-for-
menta...](http://www.thementalrunner.org/p/the-best-exercise-for-mental-
illnesses.html?m=1)

(Via the "exercise out of depression" subreddit:
[https://m.reddit.com/r/EOOD/](https://m.reddit.com/r/EOOD/) )

~~~
DanBC
The evidence for exercise as a treatment for depression is weak at best.

You should probably not recommend exercise as a treatment for depression.

Of course, exercise is important and everyone should be exercising; and it
might help with "resiliance".

[http://www.cochrane.org/CD004366/DEPRESSN_exercise-for-
depre...](http://www.cochrane.org/CD004366/DEPRESSN_exercise-for-depression)

> When only high-quality trials were included, exercise had only a small
> effect on mood that was not statistically significant.

~~~
Symbiote
> The evidence for exercise as a treatment for depression is weak at best.

That's what the link you give says...

> You should probably not recommend exercise as a treatment for depression.

But it doesn't say that.

It does say "When compared to psychological or pharmacological therapies,
exercise appears to be no more effective, though this conclusion is based on a
few small trials.", in which case, can anything be recommended?

The NHS still recommends exercise for treating depression, at least in some
cases: [http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/stress-anxiety-
depression/pages...](http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/stress-anxiety-
depression/pages/exercise-for-depression.aspx) &
[http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Depression/Pages/Treatment.aspx](http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Depression/Pages/Treatment.aspx)

------
pocketstar
Before medication try Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Read: Feeling Good: The
New Mood Therapy by David B. Burns

~~~
djokkataja
Seconded--actually I highly recommend The Feeling Good Handbook by the same
author (David Burns). I've found it very helpful for dealing with
procrastination as well.

------
EugeneOZ
Fall in love. Forget about development for a couple of weeks.

------
kordless
Hey buddy! I won't make any claims against other's opinions here. We all
_chose_ what we chose for ourselves.

Depression is the indirect result of cognitive dissonance. Cognitive
dissonance is the result of holding conflicting beliefs and feelings inside
yourself. That could be "I'm suppose to finish college" and "I want to go live
in Thailand and code for a year", for example. When you hold two opposing
beliefs, your brain attempts to resolve those beliefs through a series of
rationalizations of your feelings. Rationalizations are excuses, but just
sound better, as they are intended to resolve the dissonance so you can
function somewhat normally emotionally. The more you attempt to avoid
resolving these beliefs, the stronger your dissonance will be. All of this
results in suffering. A little suffering now, resolving things and stating
your real feelings, can help alleviate the symptoms of dissonance and the
larger suffering you are experiencing today. Accepting a little ongoing
suffering will eventually resolve the dissonance, but a choice will have to be
made. BTW, a lot of people are challenged with undestanding how they actually
feel emotionally. Celebrate the fact you already know you are sad. It's a
helluva thing to be able to do that!

Buddhism, or more specifically the 8-fold path, is essentially a mind recipe
for what I describe above. It goes something like this (with my spin on each
step after the colons):

1\. Right view: understand the problem behind a given dissonance you hold (you
may have multiple ones)

2\. Right intention: set intent to resolve one of the dissonances

3\. Right speech: talk about resolving it to others and don't represent
actions or thoughts that attempt to keep the dissonance in place

4\. Right action: put the thing you are saying into action. don't just talk
about it. do it.

5\. Right livelihood: don't let the important parts of your life keep your
dissonance in place. jobs and school are livelihoods

6\. Right effort: keep plugging at the different dissonance bits you hold
inside of you. never stop resolving them.

7\. Right mindfulness: learn to meditate, basically. there are a thousand ways
to meditate. find one that works for you.

8\. Right concentration: don't let your brain fuck with you. you, your
consciousness, is in control, not your brain. show it who's boss.

Good luck dude. I have faith you'll be just fine. You are here, after all.
That's the first step.

------
hengheng
* A daily routine is incredibly powerful -- /whatever/ the routine is and /whatever/ it is that you do. If you find yourself playing computer games for two hours every night, then that might be how you learn to concentrate again. Don't fight it before you look at yourself appreciatively.

* Do anything you need to find back your cognitive strength. You will be less intelligent while your brain chemistry is broken. That shouldn't drag you down because it's absolutely normal and natural, but it's frightening if you are a student and programmer, and used to measuring your self-worth in how well you can concentrate.

* Sleep deprivation helps supress depression for a day. Might help you get back into gear every now and then.

* St John's Wort is worth giving a try. People discuss whether it's more helpful than antidepressants, but then again it often doesn't even count as medicine. Took six weeks to kick into my own brain, and cured its chemistry back up to a point that I could sustain myself. The way back out of depression was an existential rollercoaster of emotions and attitudes with increasing frequency: Weeks at first, hours at the end while I got more stable. Some medicine might be useful for dampening, but only for that.

* Don't insist on keeping social contacts. Depressed you is somebody else than healthy you, and you can rebuild all truly good connections even after a couple of years in case they break apart. Similarly, don't insist on keeping anything else in your life if you find it doesn't work out at the moment. This is where you change careers, majors, hobbys, as well as losing your girlfriend. Keep as many things as you comfortably can a constant however, just to make it easier on yourself.

* Cognitive behavioural therapy. There's a good book on it called Feeling Good that told me /exactly/ the lessons I had missed in life, but your mileage may vary.

* Do whatever feels good to you. Your major job in life now is to make yourself feel good. After all, most people feel better than you, so it's well within your right to ignore others (and others' expectations) while focussing on yourself.

------
Nomentatus
Very strong evidence now exists, including a mouse model of bipolar illness
controlled by light exposure, that extending your photoperiod is the principle
driver of depression. You require total darkness (but red light is okay, see
last line.) And rigid hours of darkness. Sleep is important for depression,
but only affects the aldosterone cycle. If you sleep into the morning light,
you're still killing your melatonin-controlled cycle. The pRGCs that control
our clock were only discovered rather recently, so it will be perhaps a
generation before you hear this from a front line doctor.

pRGCs cannot detect red light.

------
rebelidealist
Think about how your talents can be used to help the needy. So many life
saving nonprofits and ngo can use your help even at the volunteering capacity.
You can also mentor someone who desires your skills one on one.

------
ironicaldiction
I had pretty bad depression for my whole 3rd year as an undergrad, and the
only thing that has helped me is making changes when things weren't working.

The hard part is that you don't want to make any changes, you just want to be
sad (at least I did).

What I did was lighten my course load and try to do some stuff for fun. This
meant doing more development for fun, seeing friends more often, having more
new experiences, more exercise.

It's not easy, but it's worth it. Give it time, and on the really bad days,
just know you're not alone and it gets better.

------
danmaz74
> Sadly I live in a 3rd world country, where mental illness is not an illness.
> I can get little help from people. Our healthcare system simply doesn't work
> at all

My first suggestion would be to try and find professional help there, even if
it's difficult. Did you search? Even if the healthcare system is bad, this
doesn't mean that there are no good psychologists at all. If you've got nobody
to ask, you can search for a professional association or for a college where
clinical psychology is taught, and start from there.

------
hownotwhy
I was depressed at university. The courses weren't interesting, my neighbours
were verbally abusive, and my long distance relationship was ending badly. I
ended up going to the university psychiatrist and just cried my eyes out. I
didn't pass with the grades I wanted but I got through it. If I'd do it again
I'd just talk to people. Not everyone will understand but if you're lucky
someone will. Other than that all I can say is "this too will pass"

------
lambdasquirrel
Meditation has helped me more than anything else, maybe even therapy. For
years I did it "wrong." You can meditate to train focus, and you can meditate
to dive through the layers of the mind. What helped me is the latter. The
former helps you get work done, but it actually either makes the depression
worse, or cuts you off from the world.

I don't know what the quality and breadth of instruction is, where you are in
the world, so YMMV.

------
SFjulie1
I was bankrupted so medications were not an option.

I was aware of it did not make me feel better.

a girl said let's fuck because I am also depressed and it makes people
depressed feel better. (she was bipolar)

She was lying, but I was kind of in love with her, so it made me feel better,
but not her.

In fact it works. At least for me, even if I cared more about her than me.

Just loving people heal depression a lot, I guess.

Ho! And my parent's cat was nice with me. Maybe that was the key. But who
knows?

------
cha-cho
Exercise and sunlight are scientifically proven to reduce depression. Indulge
in each for at least one hour a day. Two books (with very long titles) that
may be helpful in understanding and combatting the illness are: "The Depths:
The Evolutionary Origins of the Depression Epidemic" and "How to Stubbornly
Refuse to Make Yourself Miserable about Anything--yes, Anything!"

------
NTDF9
Socialize. Get out of the tech bubble. Seriously!

One of the biggest problem of HN type folks is that they don't try to live a
balanced life. Even the most hardworking people in the world try to balance
things out.

Take some time out to meet some friends every week. Reach out to old friends
and make new ones. Go live.

Counter-intuitive as it may sound, you'll soon see that your productivity has
increased.

------
throwdep
If your procrastination is causing or deepening your depression, consider this
book: [http://www.amazon.com/The-Now-Habit-Overcoming-
Procrastinati...](http://www.amazon.com/The-Now-Habit-Overcoming-
Procrastination/dp/1585425524) It helped me understand and break the
procrastination cycle.

------
izolate
Truth be told, I'm forever 2 weeks of inactivity away from a depressive
episode.

I have to keep moving (exercise; running 2 or 3 times a week) AND keep my mind
occupied by not concentrating on myself too much, otherwise I begin to shut
down.

This is my trick, YMMV. I do believe you can do this without medication, and
it does get easier to control as you get older. Good luck.

------
dchistov
I had the same feeling at last year. Now I'm optimistic & full energy. What
did I do?

1\. I had a rest.

2\. I had read the great book "Unlimited Power"
([https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unlimited_Power](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unlimited_Power))

3\. I had done all practics from that book.

And my life was changed!

------
facepalm
It's possible that your courses are boring. After a while at university I was
craving for measuring myself against the real world, not just against
artificial problems set by the teachers.

Perhaps you could try doing something entirely different every once in a
while?

------
ysleepy
Seems to be consensus here, but exercise really helped me to stabilize my mood
and bring back my positive stoicism. Still have trouble getting motivated, but
at least I have these days where I passionately follow some new thing into the
rabbit-hole.

------
sergiotapia
Exercise. Scientifically proven to make you feel happier. Whenever you're
feeling down bust out some reps. After a few months you will feel great, sleep
like a baby, and look amazing too!

------
johngalt
Get enough sleep and physical activity.

In my experience the brain follows the body. An active mind is generated by an
active body. Likewise a sleepy and listless mind can be created easily.

------
panjaro
[https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=9873664](https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=9873664)

------
kawera
Walk. Exercise and light will help you immensely.

Walking is an art form, like poetry, and will bring you exercise and light and
awe.

It gets better.

------
jarnix
If you know that you are depressed and can talk about it, that's a good step
and you should be glad to be aware of this.

It's difficult to quit playing games and procrastinate even when someone's not
depressed...

Meeting new people and finding a project seems a like good thing, at least it
worked for me. You should also try and going out for like walking, biking, or
whatever.

And you should avoid medicine, alcohol or drugs.

~~~
ithrewthisone
I'd argue that admitting your depression on the internet anonymously holds no
additional value whatsoever. It is the same as admitting it to yourself. I
know because I've been there, done that.

Rest of your advice is sound though.

~~~
jarnix
Many people do not even begin to admit they are depressed, that's what I was
saying: it's admitting it.

------
gesman
Refocus on something else.

Rusty car can still move to beautiful destination.

Once you start moving - rust will gradually drop off...

------
analog31
Daily vigorous exercise might help.

------
Douceur
Depression for me is like walking on a tightrope, it really is that easy to
fall. But worse than falling is spiralling. If you feel yourself falling,
command yourself to get up. If you can't get up, command yourself to drag your
body. If you can't even do that, command yourself to move _anything_ , even if
it's lifting a finger. The important thing here is that you must make sure
that your mind can at least obey direct survivalist commands like this.

I realise that this sounds a little surreal but when I was depressed, what was
in my head was much more real than the real world. In fact the real world
seemed more like a ghost. I did that exercise mentally, then gradually moved
to physical, such as commanding myself to sit up on bed after lying down for
so long. Now I don't know how deep you are in, but if you are, start with
this.

The guys here have been helpful with their suggestions but for me checklists
didn't work. Checklists were actually bad for me, because I would realise that
I couldn't do some/most of them - and then I would feel worse. There was a
time too when I was so detached from the real world that checklists looked
vague, silly even. Focus on forcing your body to obey simple, direct commands
first.

I personally don't believe in medication. In one of my bluest episodes, I
considered taking a drug like Aderall, just anything so I can pass my final
year. I'm glad I didn't. I personally believe that depression doesn't come out
of nowhere, but from a fundamental dissatisfaction buried deep inside. Do not
start digging now though. Your mind is already chaotic/empty and you do not
want to tangle things any further. Be gentle with yourself, be sensitive, and
uncover them one by one, and keep assuring yourself that it's OK and mistakes
are very OK. Again I'm sorry if this might sound surreal.

Contact with the real world is very important, but you must keep your circle
very tight and very few. When I was depressed, the world seemed fast and
cruel. But you must always tell yourself to give people a chance. I realised
that I had an almost-subconscious prejudice against a certain type of people,
namely those who seemed mild and mundane - in other words, boring and
characterless. But it was those people who helped me the most, because when
the world seems fast and cruel, 'boring' characters are refreshing and smiles
give hope. I also had a difficult relationship with my mother, but I took a
big decision to ignore my (mis)conceptions and confide a few things with her
anyway. That was life-changing, because it repaired our relationship and I
could finally see her as she is, and not someone who wants to trip me up (I
had a childhood trauma based on embarrassment, and it was one of the root
causes of my unhappiness). I'm not suggesting that you do exactly as I did
here, but keep your circle small and tight so that it can eventually become a
sort of haven.

The real world can sometimes be so overwhelming that you are not only scared
of it, you freeze on the spot. Do not be so conscious of the real world, let
it trickle in gradually. Though strip yourself bare first. Actually, we all
live in bubbles and we forget quite a lot of things that are already around
us. Beautiful and impossible things, that when you really think about it, it's
a miracle that they exist. When you look out of the window, behold the sky!
And the ships of cloud. And that child daisy-chaining since afternoon. The
tastelessness yet purity of water. The way the light scatters through the
blinds. Your hands that seem pinky-transparent when you hold them up. The
world is a miracle and you're extremely privileged to witness it.

That's my story anyway. I believe that I've recovered but I know that I'm
still on the tightrope, and it's so easy to lose balance. I absolutely loathed
those years, I considered self-destruction so many times, but sitting here
right now and typing this, I'm glad that I had the experience. It made me feel
more human. And suddenly, lots of things don't actually matter, even failures
- and I have plenty of those in my portfolio. Because being alive is a
privilege. I'm not a survivor, I've been made new all over again. _But with a
faculty for compassion._

(Another consequence of depression is my new ability to rattle off abstract
things, and I've never been good at that ... oh well.)

So stay strong, listen to yourself and trust yourself. You can do this. Just
keep getting up again because above all, you do not want things to spiral
down. You're procrastinating, which is a good sign, because you've still got
your feet anchored to this world. But do the things as I told you. You can do
this. You can do this.

Keep safe :)

------
cylinder
Good weather, sunshine.

------
m1k3r420
Coke.

------
ithrewthisone
Hey OP,

I'm 24, Male and living in a first world country. I've been suffering on/off
since I was 15 - so almost 10 years, wow actually. I remember vividly when it
started to come over me. At the time, all I wanted in my life at the time was
a decent computer to play games. I saved every single penny and once I got the
PC - I began getting depressed. Over the last 9 years it has gotten
progressively worse. Perhaps the PC was just a coincidence; I really don't
know.

Anyway, I have no reason to feel this way - I feel stupid. I feel like; how
dare I feel this way when there are so many other people worse off than me.
I'm so fucking privileged it would make others sick to their stomach to hear
me complain about my feelings. I made it through the education system - even
through my masters, and received top grades too (bar my first standard BSc.
before I learned how to study properly and game the education system).

I am now employed and on a nice salary for my age (€40k starting, with free
health insurance, and bonus). I drive a nice car (inherited). I have a
girlfriend of 2 years (she knows - hardest thing I've ever done), and to top
it off I know her about 20 years. Yes I know, almost my whole life.

I had my first major breakdown last year. It was actually sparked from a fight
with my girlfriend I think. I was doing my masters and started a company on
the side. It was a lot to take on, and my girlfriend is full time - if you
know what I mean. So I broke.

I saw a counselor (sorry don't know how to spell that one, even being native
English speaker), for about 3 months I think it was. I had a very limited
budget when I was in university so I could only pay her €10 a week - which was
so embarrassing as I pulled up in my 2008 BMW coupe. I felt so ashamed, but
she understood my rare circumstance and was very helpful and I am so grateful
for what she has done for me.

I was also suffering from an eating disorder at the time. I was borderline
standard bulimic - and had full on exercise bulimia (arguably still do). I
work out 4 times per week, but love bodybuilding so I guess that's a gray
area. I was benching 100kg during my exam periods for my masters, and coding
everything for my startup at the same time. Stupid amount of work. No wonder I
was fucked.

I don't really know where I'm going with this, but I do know that you cannot
let it get the better of you. I look at what I've achieved while dealing with
the issues I have and I know that I am a driven person - no matter what. It
may hold me back a bit, but it doesn't define me or change my determination.

Keep on keeping on is such a true statement. I make myself get up out of bed
and worry about putting my pants on after. I isolate my thoughts to get
through. I just drive to the gym, nothing else. Once I'm there, I just get out
of the car, that's it. Before you know it, you are in the gym and you didn't
miss another work out. Same goes for the rest of the things you want to
accomplish.

My two parents also have alcohol addictions, which obviously doesn't help. My
Dad was suicidal when he was my age, and had a brief stay in rehab within a
mental hospital. My Mum is recently out of surgery due to years of dietary
abuse, but continues to drink daily. I'd say if she went cold turkey - it'd
kill her. I don't talk to my parents much anymore since I moved away. I'm OK
with that, but I wish it didn't have to be this way.

Keep on keeping on.

------
dominotw
zoloft

------
kelukelugames
Moved.

