
The days are long but the decades are short - jordanmessina
http://blog.samaltman.com/the-days-are-long-but-the-decades-are-short
======
astrocat
> _On work: it’s difficult to do a great job on work you don’t care about. And
> it’s hard to be totally happy /fulfilled in life if you don’t like what you
> do for your work_

I get that this is aimed at the startup crowd, but I've always felt that this
sentiment is pretty privileged. We, the elite, get to cherry pick our work and
do what we like. But I bet 9/10 people will never _feel_ they have this
luxury, and 8/10 will be right.

> _Most people pick their career fairly randomly..._

And in the truest sense of "most people" I would bet that "most people take
whatever work they can get, and sometimes something sticks" is probably more
accurate.

I know these sentiments are a bit cynical, I just can help but feel sometimes
that it's irresponsible to dump the "you can be/do anything!" sentiment on our
youth when the reality is nowhere near that for most of them. I understand we
need ideals and motivation to make them a reality, but more flowery advice
doesn't seem to be the best tactic.

Regardless, Sam is an amazing individual who has done an enormous amount for
others and the startup community. This isn't meant to disparage his views or
advice; ironically, I think it's just hardest to give truly sage advice when
you're _trying_ to be sage.

~~~
zan2434
Hmm I always default to not "do what you love" but "love what you do" in that
most work has some interesting component, and what's really important to
develop is the ability to isolate that aspect and motivate yourself with it.
That's something I think everyone can use, regardless of their position in
life

~~~
nosuchthing
It's easy to say, but in practice it's difficult to go home satisfied with the
concept of a dead end job.

Personally I found plenty of little things to love about otherwise horrible
dead end jobs, but that wasn't really the reason to keep going back to work, I
was there to get paid to live my life outside of work because the job itself
was not really fun or fruitful.

~~~
andyjdavis
>Personally I found plenty of little things to love about otherwise horrible
dead end jobs, but that wasn't really the reason to keep going back to work, I
was there to get paid to live my life outside of work because the job itself
was not really fun or fruitful.

I actually think this is a better message for people...

Some jobs are going to be great, others are going to suck. That doesn't really
matter because for most people its what you do outside of your job that will
determine your happiness. Try and find a job/career that you like but
sometimes a job is just something you do for money to fund other stuff and
that is perfectly ok.

Personally I find the increasing emphasis on work as a way to derive personal
satisfaction troubling. It looks like a subtle trap to me. A way to convince
people to forgo time with their family, hobbies, side ventures and anything
else you might possibly derive happiness from in favor of just working more
and trying to convince yourself that that is enough.

If you love your job then more power to you but sometimes a job is just a
means to an end and that is perfectly ok. Just make sure that you are spending
the rest of your time doing stuff that makes you happy. Spend time with family
and friends, make something, learn something new and make sure you are using
the money from your job in ways that will contribute to your long term
financial well being.

~~~
jader201
_> Personally I find the increasing emphasis on work as a way to derive
personal satisfaction troubling. It looks like a subtle trap to me. A way to
convince people to forgo time with their family, hobbies, side ventures and
anything else you might possibly derive happiness from in favor of just
working more and trying to convince yourself that that is enough._

A counterpoint to this is that many people -- myself included -- see that we
spend so much of our waking hours at a job (about 40% assuming a 40-hour week)
that we want to spend that 40% doing something that makes us happy.

So it's not that work defines us or drives our satisfaction, but that work
makes up a large part of our lifespan, and it seems wasteful to spend it doing
something just to facilitate the happiness of the other 60%.

I don't want to strive to be happy just 60% of the time -- I want to strive to
be happy 100% of the time.

~~~
astrocat
I completely understand the sentiment - 40% seems like a lot to be "burning"
for the sake of the other 60.

But it's helped me to think about this in a different context: think about the
time you spend with your spouse. How much of that time is taken up with
"life's necessities" like doing laundry, dishes, prepping meals, cleaning,
more cleaning, driving places, even arguing and getting hurt are all part of
relationships... And all that stuff takes time and it's not a nice meal out or
a walk on the beach or an impromptu dance session. There's a lot of the
mundane in our most treasured relationships, and the only people who have a
problem with that are teenagers.

Should work/life really be any different?

~~~
xargos
Those "life necessities" in a relationship are not so bad because the goal,
i.e. the relationship is (usually) very important to us. The same goes for a
job. If you are working on something that has a great value to you, even the
boring tasks are usually not so bad. However if you are in a job where the
final goal is of no interest to you things change. If tasks are boring and
mundane, you will burn out quickly. In effect I believe that anything we do
has to have at least something that is important to us, whether it is the
journey or the goal it self, otherwise it would be very difficult to keep
being satisfied with what we do.

------
pyrrhotech
A lot of the points can be boiled down to "work very hard". But what if you
simply are the type of person who doesn't like working? Another point is do
what makes you happy. For some lucky folks, work makes them happy, but there's
a lot of us who don't like it. And no, it's not just a specific job. A lot of
us are just kinda lazy to be perfectly honest. The things I enjoy most are
running, eating fine meals, quality times having beers with friends,
traveling, reading and playing video games. I do work so I can support myself
so that I can do those other things, but I certainly wouldn't work if I didn't
have to (and I've worked and saved long enough that I'm fairly wealthy and
won't have to for very much longer).

I think one of the reasons is that I don't care about social status or
material possessions or competing at who can make the best chat app or
anything like that, and work just feels like a grind to me. Sure, some of it
is better than other parts, but in the end, I'd always rather be doing
something else. I also am not usually impressed with other peoples' career
achievements, and getting a promotion or a better job doesn't give me any sort
of feeling of accomplishment or 'high', just, well I guess I'm a few years
closer to being wealthy enough to get out of this bullshit.

A lot of people will look down on me for this, but I'm ok with that as I'm not
trying to win a popularity contest. I just don't think "work hard" is
necessarily the best advice to all people. I do think work is important as
it's a means of contributing to society, and in the end, I'm glad I did my
part, but after I have enough to "get out", I'll have satisfied my conscience
to spend the rest of my days having good times and doing things that really
make me happy.

~~~
bonesmoses
I'm a bit older than the author, and for me, it has come down to this:

"The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time."

The article contains a lot of good, sensible statements. But it was clearly
written for, and by, someone with far more ambition than I'll ever have.

Maybe I'm just burned out from all the Work Hard rhetoric that got me here,
but nobody on their death bed laments that they didn't spend enough time at
the office.

~~~
mathattack
_Maybe I 'm just burned out from all the Work Hard rhetoric that got me here,
but nobody on their death bed laments that they didn't spend enough time at
the office._

Perhaps, but a lot may have lamented not having more financial security.

------
JoeAltmaier
I was 5 minutes late to work every morning, because of taking my son to school
in the neighborhood where our new house was being built. I didn't want him to
have to move schools in the middle of the year.

Boss said "This won't do. You'll have to examine your priorities."

I thought about it all day, that night. Next morning I got to work (5 minutes
late), went in his office, said "I examined my priorities. Work is #12." and I
left.

~~~
mathattack
I can absolutely see this at an investment bank, or at a job where physical
presence is mandatory (such as a security guard, a teacher, or a bank teller).
In a creative job like software, it's absurd. Especially when so many places
say, "Come when you want".

~~~
vonmoltke
Then why bother with an office at all? We have discussions here about remote
work and private offices disrupting team communication, but if your team isn't
all in the office at the same time I don't see how that is any better.

~~~
rifung
I like coming in the office to be honest. I prefer face to face communication
and also usually am much more productive at work than at home. I think it's
just easier to get into the mood when I'm at my desk at work.

Also, even though not everyone comes in at the same time usually there are
"core hours" where everyone is expected to be in the office. At my last job
this was from 10-3. I don't think it's too unreasonable for a team to be able
to find some time when everyone can be in the office, especially when it's
only a few hours long.

Of course, this could all be simulated as well if people had work
environments. Still, I find face to face interaction much better than trying
to communicate online, even with video chat. Maybe it's just about finding the
right software to help, but I find being able to talk at the white board
invaluable.

~~~
vonmoltke
> Also, even though not everyone comes in at the same time usually there are
> "core hours" where everyone is expected to be in the office. At my last job
> this was from 10-3. I don't think it's too unreasonable for a team to be
> able to find some time when everyone can be in the office, especially when
> it's only a few hours long.

I don't think it's unreasonable, either. In fact, I think it's necessary to
run a successful business with more than one person. However, it's not
"absurd" to have some definition of late or to expect some consistency in when
particular people arrive. That said, the original described case _is_ overly
and unnecessarily rigid.

------
rkroondotnet
One of the things I always feel when I read something like this is that I am
running out of time. I'm 29, so this is a comparison that's easy to make. And
because I feel like maybe you guys will have the same reaction I wanted to
show you this:

[http://www.businessinsider.com/people-who-became-
successful-...](http://www.businessinsider.com/people-who-became-successful-
after-age-40-2014-9)

There may be a better version of this article out there, but the essence is
that it's not too late to start to be great at something. So don't let the
stress of a successful 30 year old get you wound up.

~~~
ddingus
Heck, I've changed careers, and been great at each of them, three times.

I'm looking to do it again too, but not for a while. I've got some unfinished
business with this one.

A mentor of mine is late in life now. We've had a 20 year dialog on this.
Never, ever too late.

------
hans
our culture is so tone deaf to aging, you turn 30 and think life is behind
you, old man before death's door ..

(anyone know the W.Blake drawing?)

in another decade 19yr olds will be drafting up long blog posts about recipes
for success, how they made it, legacy concerns et al.

its like the old man's domain got poached, and now old people have nothing to
say they are so far out there .. :]

~~~
finnjohnsen2
Couldn't agree more.

------
jader201
_" 1) Never put your family, friends, or significant other low on your
priority list."_

I would have worded this as:

"Always put your family, friends, and significant other at the top on your
priority list."

Or, at the very least, "above work".

~~~
peteretep

        > "Always put your family, friends, and significant other
        > at the top on your priority list." Or, at the very
        > least, "above work".
    

This is a sure-fire way to get stuck in a little town with a dead-end job and
the same kids you went to high-school with.

Some people are important people to prioritize in your life, but just because
they happen to be a friend, related, or you're dating them is not a reason to
put them above your other priorities.

Answering "Where am I going?" and "Who am I going there with?" in the wrong
order is a mistake.

------
fuzzythinker
> When in doubt, kiss the boy/girl

I got slapped in the face doing that in middle school.

~~~
guynamedloren
Better than not doing it and forever wondering "what if".

~~~
philh
Better for the kisser, perhaps, but presumably not the kissee.

------
samsolomon
Those of you on HN that are past the 30+ mark. What would you add to this
list?

~~~
sz4kerto
Having a child relativizes everything else and makes life so much easier
because you don't need to figure out the meaning of your life anymore and you
don't even need to be successful, neither personally nor professionally. This
does not mean you won't be or you can't be, it just does not matter that much
anymore. And this is friggin' liberating.

~~~
mikeg8
I have an amazing father and grandfathers, all of whom I am close with. I've
dreamed of being a father for many years (26M) and think I'll make a great one
someday based on the examples I was fortunate enough to have.

But I don't like the thought that as soon as you have a child, you instantly
have to be defined by that. Is reproduction really the meaning to life?
(Biologists say absolutely). And saying you don't have to be successful
anymore is very strange to me. Why wound't you need to be successful
professionally to provide or personally to be happy? Don't you want your child
to be successful, not rich but personally successful however they grow to
define it? and shouldn't you show that to them by example?

~~~
JoeAltmaier
Not reproduction: parenthood. Never mind how the kid got there; they are soon
more important than everything you naïvely thought mattered.

Not so much defined by that. Instead, motivated by entirely new impulses. Its
not that you change your mind about success. Your mind changes, and that isn't
a bad thing.

~~~
jacquesm
If there is one thing that rammed that home it was sitting next to an
incubator watching O2 levels and heartbeat of an early born infant. Re-
alignment of priorities would be a very mild way to describe the feeling.

~~~
gregpilling
I agree. My son spent his first week in NICU, and 6 years later had a brain
aneurism, and another brain surgery at 11 years. He is fine now. Work problems
are pretty insignificant in comparison.

------
Kiro
Since these lists are always a lot about friends and family let me list some
non-mainstream insights I've gained about my own life:

1\. Social activities are mostly a waste of time.

2\. If you want to sit at home 24/7 programming then do it.

3\. Don't make it a habit coming up with excuses. Learn to say no without an
excuse attached.

4\. Some people are not meant to be in a relationship. If you're in a healthy
and happy relationship but things still feel off, considering terminating it.

~~~
mikob
This reads like sarcasm. But if you're serious, put it this way: if you were
on this Earth alone what would you live for? Would you be sitting at home
programming 24/7?

------
lukasm
"Aim to be the best in the world at whatever you do professionally. "

"Become the best at one specific thing. Become very good (top 25%) at two or
more things. The first strategy is difficult to the point of near
impossibility. Few people will ever play in the NBA or make a platinum album.
I don’t recommend anyone even try."

ref
[http://pmarchive.com/guide_to_career_planning_part2.html](http://pmarchive.com/guide_to_career_planning_part2.html)

~~~
lojack
> Become the best at one specific thing.

I don't necessarily think that's even close to impossible. You can always
increase the specificity of a skill to the point where it's possible to become
the best at it. If you want an example, it's near impossible for most people
to become the best programmer (there can only be one), but go to github and
pick a random library and pick the most active contributor to that library and
you've most likely found someone who is the best at that domain. Then look at
the number of libraries on GitHub. Then you'll start to see how many people
are the best at a very specific domain of knowledge.

~~~
cortesoft
Sure, it isn't logically impossible. In fact, everyone is certainly the best
in the world at SOMETHING, if you get specific enough (like, I am best in the
world at physically occupying the space I exist in).... but that doesn't
really mean much. Being the best at something only means something if what you
are the best at matters.

~~~
thegeomaster
I guess you could word that as "it means something if what you are the best at
matters to you". If there is something that really matters to you, by all
means do all you can to be the best in it. You will love every bit of it while
you're trying (okay, not every bit, but you get my point), which will make you
happy---for instance, I've never met a great musician who didn't look forward
to and didn't love their practice sessions. And, as an added bonus, you might
actually become the best, or really, really damn good. That must feel
heavenly.

------
johnward
" On work: it’s difficult to do a great job on work you don’t care about. And
it’s hard to be totally happy/fulfilled in life if you don’t like what you do
for your work."

How do you fix this? For the last 10 years of my life I've basically woken up
each morning and wished I hadn't. I don't like what I do. I can't afford to
not do it anymore. I don't even know what, if anything, I would actually enjoy
waking up for.

~~~
Balgair
Try a psychologist then, but before you start taking any drugs from them, just
do a quick head count of the people around you. If more than 25% of them are
total assholes, it's time to move.

Really though, I don't know your situation, but it sounds like you gotta grab
your huevos and change something.

If there are financial issues, get rid of them as best you can. Explore other
options for making money or getting out of debt or whatever you are in.

If there are family/emotional reasons, remember that other people have feet
too and can walk with you to a new place.

If there are depression reasons, I hear running and weight lifting are great
for it. Docs too, as I said. Also, music and dancing seem to be good too.

You gotta plan for the end of your life just as much as the next meeting. And
only you can do it for you. Take baby steps though, but keep them rolling.

~~~
johnward
I've been to a counsellor but no psychologist is taking new patients in my
area (that I've been able to find). I get up everyday at 6 and hit the gym
before work. Usually 30-60 minutes of walking on an incline followed by an
hour of lifting. I run maybe 1 or 2 times a week, still trying to get back
into it. It's a little bit more difficult at 275lbs then I remember it being
at <220lb but I still can make it 2 miles without stopping. I'm down 30lbs but
I'm still up and down emotionally. I don't really have any reason my life
seems pretty good relatively speaking. I'm much better now than I was a few
years ago but still not good enough I guess.

------
epberry
"Summers are the best." Agreed! Although I think fall in the midwest is my
favorite combination of season and location. Too bad it always goes by so
quickly.

~~~
peteretep
I would extend that to: get the hell out of anywhere the weather is making you
miserable, at all costs. If you don't cope well with darkness, London and
Scandinavia are not the right places for you.

------
_metamorphosis_
I guess Sam is aging now :) Thats when you start thinking - "wow! this is how
I feel about life and it totally makes sense. Let me share with the world".
And now you understand why elderlies love to talk and give "sound" advice to
any person without grey hair.

------
yaniksilver
Sam has achieved a lot already at the age of 30. I will be 30 next year, and
am not even close. There are a lot of decisions you make timely can change
your life significantly. That's what I need to do.

I have been fighting depression since last two years...I thought to quit quite
a few times. I tried to resist. But when the pressure rise...sometimes I
thought to do a suicide.

I have been suffering from a depression that I didn't get what I deserve...an
opportunity that can change my life. While being capable, talented, named
among rising marketers around the world, mentioned in a McGraw Hill published
best seller.

I wish there is a way to survive. I wish I could tell the world that I am
equally capable of making things happen.

Trying hard and will resist to quit until the depression kill me forever.

------
MrZongle2
37) Don't assume that those older than you are any less intelligent or capable
of understanding a problem; they were, after all, your age once and possibly
even smarter than you at this point.

~~~
bsimpson
37) Don't assume that age correlates to intelligence or expertise.

It goes in both directions. When I took my first full-time job, I was 24. I
had no academic background in computer science. Because of those two facts, I
held my tongue when managers and executives made decisions I didn't
understand. Turns out just because they are in their 40s and have senior
titles doesn't mean they make sound decisions.

------
bengali3
> "having enough money so that you don’t stress about paying rent does more to
> change your wellbeing than having enough money to buy your own jet"

remember the old adage future billionaires of HNs: "if it flys, floats or
flirts, it's cheaper to rent it".

Rarely does it make sense to buy a jet until you're utilizing over 100 hrs
annually. Charter->JetCard->Fractional->Ownership

~~~
bbcbasic
>> ...or flirts...

That is so not politically correct. It's funny.

~~~
ojbyrne
The version I heard used a different f-word. So it's definitely politically
correct.

------
throwaway9324
I find this unremarkable. It's good advice for sure and most people would
casually agree with it, but it's not consistent with what YC is doing nor
preaching. That doesn't give the advice much weight in my opinion.

~~~
theandrewbailey
YC is more than just Sam.

------
27182818284
He sadly didn't include one of his more insightful, recent Tweets.
[https://twitter.com/sama/status/593111270095630336](https://twitter.com/sama/status/593111270095630336)

Or perhaps that falls under #18 on the list.

------
BhavdeepSethi
If I had to pick the best line in that blog, it'll be this: "You become an
average of the people you spend the most time with."

------
eonw
maybe he got his position in life based on luck... who is to say the same
advice will get anyone anywhere? i think its thoughtful and enjoyed reading
it... but i prefer to take all words with a grain of salt.

------
JohnLen
Might be due to the competitive nature that we are living in this world.
Things moving fast and everyone competes to be better, working longer hours
each day . The hectic life that we experiencing daily make us feels like time
past faster.

~~~
ddingus
THIS!

I've noticed the difference. It's been slower. I feel like managing this
perception is very important.

------
noonespecial
That was great. I actually heard the music in my head and expected #37 to be
"Trust me on the sunscreen".

------
hsrada
> 11) Go out of your way to be around smart, interesting, ambitious people.

That is hard.

~~~
pbowyer
Especially if your significant other's career takes you from a university city
full of smart, interesting people to an industrial town in the middle of
nowhere.

The internet is a poor medium for motivation and learning compared to real
people.

------
Thiz
> ... but the decades are short

And there are only ten of them. Don't waste them.

If I could pick where to live my decades again this is what I'd do:

1st decade in South America. Learn to play and love your family.

2nd decade in Europe. Learn to study and admire art.

3rd decade in USA. Learn to make money.

4th decade in Australia. Learn to raise a family.

5th decade in Africa. Learn to love nature.

6th decade in Germany. Learn to philosophize.

7th decade in India. Learn to pray.

8th decade in the caribbean. Learn to enjoy life.

9th decade in an asylum. Learn to make friends for the last trip.

You won't make it to the tenth decade. Enjoy it while it lasts.

------
Nicholas_C
The title reminds me of a Modest Mouse lyric: "The years go fast. And the days
go so slow." Great commentary on life and how time seems to pass.

------
brc
>Youth is a really great thing. Don’t waste it. In fact, in your 20s, I think
it’s ok to take a “Give me financial discipline, but not just yet” attitude.
All the money in the world will never get back time that passed you by.

This is kind of conflicting with the 'keep your personal burn rate low', and I
don't really agree with it. Here's why: most young people who burn a ton of
money do it on something stupid, like buying a new car they can't afford, or
going on a series of expensive holidays they will barely remember, or wasting
money on expensive clothing labels.

When you're in your twenties, keeping your personal burn rate low is
imperative, and the excess needs to go into investment. The wonders of
compounding really start to kick in right when you need it the most down the
track.

I was pushed towards making investments early on and hands down they were the
best decisions I ever made. It meant forgoing party holidays with friends I
don't talk to anymore, and having old cars and having to stay in sometimes.

So developing financial discipline early is paramount, because the investment
habit gets harder and harder as you go on, as life's luxuries and personal
expectations go up and up.

For the record, eating ramen while working on startups falls into the
investment category, as long as you're serious about making it work.

I don't know how rich sama is, and maybe wasting a bit of cash was fine
because the cash rolled in, but for the majority of people in their early
twenties, starting saving and investing 10-20% of your income now. And
definitely stay away from expensive iTems bought on credit. The worst thing
you can do is develop a credit habit - you'll spend the majority of life
setting up someone else's retirement.

------
stegosaurus
A lot of these posts seem to just accept that 'not everyone is as lucky as
us'.

I agree, but not because of the same reasons.

I went through a period in my life when I just realised that playing silly
games wasn't worth it any more. I gave up on the idea of being an 'adult',
whatever that means.

As a human being I have judgement and I know what me arriving late / not
arriving to work means. I don't need to be told.

If I am ill, I don't come. If you have a system of 'sickness days', you can
employ someone else. Because I am an honest person and I do not want my basic
human tendencies to be policed. Biology doesn't care about your employment
contract.

I enter and leave work when I want to. 99.9% of the time this is normal office
hours, but if something important comes up, life comes first.

I think this is perfectly reasonable.

It means I will be paid less. It means I probably won't be CEO of an
investment bank. I don't care.

I am a human being, not a cog in a machine. I'll give up my roof, my food, my
clothing before I subject myself again.

------
somberi
Adding my 2 cents to the chatter about becoming a parent and the changes in
the brain.

[http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2015/01/what-
happe...](http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2015/01/what-happens-to-a-
womans-brain-when-she-becomes-a-mother/384179/)

------
rdudekul
_> Whether or not money can buy happiness, it can buy freedom, and that’s a
big deal._

For me freedom was more important than absolute wealth. I found that freedom
need not be very expensive. The idea is to convert your savings into income
overtime. First become a software development consultant, then keep building
your reputation and rates consequently by delivering results. Then invest your
savings in income generating assets.

There are a few things I experimented with that yielded some results:

a) Buy economical/smaller commercial real estate and rent it out to companies

b) Lend money on interest to people you trust. Initially give them small
amounts and depending on their ability to consistently pay interest, you may
lend them more money on some kind of securities (their real estate properties
etc).

c) Research annuities and invest in various annuities. I am yet to explore
this option fully.

Overall I am happy with my progress so far, that afforded me to take a year
off in India (living relatively well in a 4000 sq.ft villa).

------
Bouncingsoul1
I am 31, I just have 1 advice to share. Be patient, your time will come and
you've got more time than you think you have.

~~~
andrey-g
Are you sure this advice is not a result of confirmation and survivorship
biases?

------
jmnicolas
It's funny how a 30 yo gives advices like he's an old (wise) man :-)

You barely become a real adult at 30 (before you're just a "legal" adult) and
there's a lot more experience needed to advise people about their lives.

Oh and fwiw, I'm 37 and still don't feel qualified to teach people about their
lives.

~~~
gokhan
Teaching vs advice :)

I'm 40+ and find his advice quite good and spot on. Reading and thinking on
such matters, and hanging around with wise man (he surely does) will make you
grow wiser faster. I don't think there's a speed limit on anything if we're
talking about humans. There will always be high achievers like Sam, his career
shows it. I learned not to ignore them regardless of age and feel good about
it.

------
navait
> How to succeed: pick the right thing to do (this is critical and usually
> ignored)

How does one even find the right thing to do?

~~~
cortesoft
Well, start by not doing the wrong thing to do.

------
bodecker
Awesome advice. Reminds me of this response on Quora - "How should a 24-year-
old invest time?":

[http://www.quora.com/How-should-a-24-year-old-invest-
time-1/...](http://www.quora.com/How-should-a-24-year-old-invest-
time-1/answer/Rizwan-Aseem)

------
anon261114
_1) Never put your family, friends, or significant other low on your priority
list_

 _2) Don’t spend time trying to maintain relationships with people you don’t
like, and cut negative people out of your life._

Unfortunately, for me, those two points are in contradiction.

~~~
minot
I know it is never easy in practice and I'd urge you to think long and hard
(like American founding fathers had to when seceding from Britannia) but it is
possible and sometimes imperative to decide who is family and who is no longer
family.

------
orionblastar
All good advice. Wish I knew it when I was starting out. I should have made
more friends, I should have taken more risks, I should have found ways to
avoid stress so I wouldn't end up sick and disabled.

------
zpatel
It may sound a bit weird but here's one from me:

ponder over the internals (design) of your own self at least once in your
life.

~~~
peteretep
Book recommendation: "Psychocybernetics".

------
pan69
>> Occasionally stay up until the sun rises talking to people.

Ha! Just wait 'till you hit 40 my friend..

------
jclish
Brings to mind the "Notebooks of Lazarus Long" portions of Heinlein's "Time
Enough for Love". Viewed from 52 years old you make me wish my thoughts had
been as coherent when I was 30. Good stuff.

------
kenjackson
I hate these types of lists. But this one in particular seemed quite good.

------
mathattack
I believe that the title captures everything. Similar with having kids too,
btw. Anything worth doing does require a lot of work. Long days, and you
forget the time periods.

~~~
mhb
The days are long but the years are short:
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KktuoQwb3vQ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KktuoQwb3vQ)

------
jqm
There is so much crap that comes out of startup guys, but occasionally one
comes across a diamond. I'm bookmarking the page. This is wisdom.

------
iseedeadpeople
I agree with all the points, but, as with most things, the gulf between
knowing and doing is gigantic.

------
sinwave
This is actually some really great advice to hear upon graduating from
college. Thank you.

------
Ryan-hou
Really helpful, but the question is too hard to concentrate so many things on
one person.

------
natural219
I agree with this list almost entirely, except I would move #18 to #1.

------
edpichler
A lot of wisdom in a young man. I did not know he is just 30.

------
adnam
37) make shorter lists

------
kungfooey
Are we really at the point where a 30 year old can offer sage advice on living
life? Wow.

As a counterpoint to "be the best you can be in your profession":
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hIJdFxYlEKE](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hIJdFxYlEKE)
[PyCon keynote by Jacob Kaplan-Moss on 'mediocre developers'].

~~~
runesoerensen
I can't say I'm surprised to see this as the top comment, but I think it's sad
that you (and apparently many other upvoters) don't think 30 year olds can
offer valuable advice on life.

It's also wrong as proven by history. Many writers have produced some of their
best works at the same age. One example is Kirkegaard who wrote "Fear and
Trembling"[1] at age 30.

If you think that Sam's advice is narrowminded or bad as a result of his age
you can address that in your comment. That would add value to the discussion
-- it currently does no such thing.

Go for the ball not the man.

[1]([http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fear_and_Trembling](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fear_and_Trembling))

~~~
kungfooey
Clarification: I'm not saying that _no_ 30 year old can offer sage advice. I
don't think Altman is on the same level as Kirkegaard here. As others have
pointed out, the list is not terribly revolutionary.

It simply struck me as odd that this (not particularly revelatory list) could
be passed off as worthy of note. What, other than his work with YC, makes
Sam's musings worthy of our time?

~~~
waterlesscloud
There's nothing wrong with the list.

It's not like the earlier pg essays that literally changed the ways I think
about a lot of things.

It's just a list of largely common platitudes. Nothing wrong with that in
itself, though. Many of them are worth reiterating from time to time.

~~~
kungfooey
> There's nothing wrong with the list.

Pretty high bar you have for lists there!

------
bpizzi
I can't help comparing this set of advices to its 2000y old stoics
counterparts (no offense being intended to OP).

1) Never put your family, friends, or significant other low on your priority
list.

> stoic way: definitely a stoic's one, we're meant to love nature and mankind.

2) Life is not a dress rehearsal—this is probably it. Make it count.

> stoic way: there's no joy in pursuing anything, because you'll always want
> more, thus you can't have it all and will feel unfullfilled.

3) How to succeed: pick the right thing to do

> stoic way: "How to die at peace: achieve tranquility" ~ do not seek success
> nor something to do.

4) On work: [...] it’s hard to be totally happy/fulfilled in life if you don’t
like what you do for your work.

> stoic way: a fullfilled life is a life where you let nothing harms your
> tranquility.

5) On money: Whether or not money can buy happiness, it can buy freedom, and
that’s a big deal.

> stoic way: true freedom comes when you don't own nothing and owe nobody.

6) Talk to people more.

> stoic way: learn and teach, but do not expose your inner feelings, let them
> pass on you.

7) Don’t waste time.

> stoic way: to embrace fatalism is to achieve tranquility. Time is meant to
> be contemplated.

8) Don’t let yourself get pushed around.

> stoic way: yes, don't let other's aggressivity have an impact on your
> tranquility

9) Have clear goals for yourself

> stoic way: yes, definitely, but those goals should get you to tranquility

10) However, as valuable as planning is, if a great opportunity comes along
you should take it.

> stoic way: only if that opportunity will let you achieve a more peaceful
> state of mind

11) Go out of your way to be around smart, interesting, ambitious people.

> stoic way: be around peaceful, calm, wise people.

12) Minimize your own cognitive load from distracting things that don’t really
matter.

> stoic way: yes, if what really matters is one own tranquility

13) Keep your personal burn rate low.

> stoic way: yes, if by a low personal burn rate you mean a high tranquility
> level

14) Summers are the best.

> stoic way: there's not real winter on mediterranean coasts :)

15) Don’t worry so much.

> stoic way: yes, definitely, never forget that your life is meant to an end
> sooner or later, always be prepared for that moment, die in peace.

16) Ask for what you want.

> stoic way: you should get rid of the feeling that you want things, it's a
> infinite loop.

17) If you think you’re going to regret not doing something, you should
probably do it.

> stoic way: to regret something is only a consequence of wanting something,
> consider not wanting something at first

18) Exercise. Eat well. Sleep. Get out into nature with some regularity.

> stoic way: Excercise because it reminds you of your limits. Eat only what's
> necessary because it makes you enjoy good meals when it occurs.

19) Go out of your way to help people. Few things in life are as satisfying.

> stoic way: learn to love people whatever they do, few things in life can
> have more impact on your peace of mind that letting others behaviors
> perturbs you.

20) Youth is a really great thing. Don’t waste it.

> stoic way: youth is meant to prepare you to be a fullfilled elder, and in
> that sens you should not waste it.

21) Tell your parents you love them more often.

> stoic way: you sould tell yourself repeatedly how much you'll be sad when
> you'll loose your parents, because that will let you seek and enjoy their
> company more often. That works for family and friends too, of course.

23) Learn voraciously.

> stoic way: learn, then teach

24) Do new things often.

> stoic way: do less, seek peace of mind, that's where lies the feeling of an
> accomplished life

25) Remember how intensely you loved your boyfriend/girlfriend when you were a
teenager? Love him/her that intensely now.

> stoic way: see 21)

26) Don’t screw people and don’t burn bridges. Pick your battles carefully.

> stoic way: avoid battles, battles lead to anger, anger lead to a crippled
> life by destroying your tranquility

27) Forgive people.

> stoic way: you sould have nothing to forgive at first, because you should
> not let others have impact on your peace of mind. However if someone asks
> for forgiveness, then let it be.

28) Don’t chase status.

> stoic way: definitely a stoic advice, don't chase fame.

29) Most things are ok in moderation. Almost nothing is ok in extreme amounts.

> stoic way: things are ok in scarcity, that's when you enjoy it most when it
> occurs.

30) Existential angst is part of life. [...] Nothing is wrong with you for
feeling this way; you are not alone.

> stoic way: true, we are not alone and we are all humans. But that is false
> to suggest that it's ok the suffer angst, we should not let us be angst-
> ridden.

31) Be grateful and keep problems in perspective. Don’t complain too much.
Don’t hate other people’s success (but remember that some people will hate
your success, and you have to learn to ignore it).

> stoic way: oh yes, "you have to learn to ignore it", that's is very stoicish
> :)

32) Be a doer, not a talker.

> stoic way: be a thinker

34) Think for a few seconds before you act. Think for a few minutes if you’re
angry.

> stoic way: think, then do nothing

35) Don’t judge other people too quickly. You never know their whole story and
why they did or didn’t do something. Be empathetic.

> stoic way: yes, be empathetic, but do not judge at all, because it gives you
> no more tranquility

36) The days are long but the decades are short.

> stoic way: your life is long, as long as you contemplate every single moment

Disclaimer #1: I'm not a native english speaker

Disclaimer #2: I've been introduced to Stoic philosophy by "A guide to the
good life", where William B. Irvine make a good digest of Seneca, Epictetus
and others. I'm in no way an expert and may (must) have made mistakes here.

------
peterburkimsher
Pray.

------
ejpastorino
Can't agree more.

------
andreash
tl;dr: YOLO

------
bahmboo
Make shorter lists?

------
ronilan
I think that when you have kids you realize that actually "The days are short
but the dacades are long."

I have been part of three times "their whole life", and still, not a decade
gone by.

------
lugg
Heh getting close to 30 I felt awkward reading this one:

> 20) Youth is a really great thing. Don’t waste it. In fact, in your 20s, I
> think it’s ok to take a “Give me financial discipline, but not just yet”
> attitude. All the money in the world will never get back time that passed
> you by.

Compounding interest takes time and not a lot of money, don't let that time
pass you by.

~~~
sltkr
Compound interest isn't some magical force.
[https://xkcd.com/947/](https://xkcd.com/947/)

------
bambax
> _Ask for what you want._

That advice will land you in jail.

~~~
theandrewbailey
> Be nice to strangers. Be nice even when it doesn’t matter.

I guess you missed this.

~~~
bambax
I usually never comment when I'm downvoted; I was assuming it was because
people found my comment too short and unfunny, but your comment makes me
wonder if people actually think it's mean??

What I meant was, the things I actually want are mostly illegal and it's
better to not ask for them out loud.

So if my comment is mean, it's mean to me.

------
amackera
Sam seems so wise, even for somebody so young! Everything he writes is a
pleasure to read. Calm, considered, sometimes controversial, but always worth
digesting.

~~~
sz4kerto
Many 20 yo liberal arts students (sorry, exaggerating here) could come up with
a list like that but nobody would care because they're not the head of
YCombinator. With Status comes authority, with authority comes self confidence
and with that comes the feeling of wisdom.

This is a good list, worth reading and talking about it; but for me wisdom
means non-trivial, sometimes contraintuitive deep insight. Wisdom needs
intelligence, experience and perspective (that mostly equals age). If you take
any of these three out then it's usually not wisdom.

Or maybe I'm totally wrong because I definitely lack the age :)

~~~
perdunov
You're exactly right. I'd go even further and say that the piece is quite
superficial and the tone of it reminds of some holy book filled with
commonplace morals.

