
The NSA is Not Asking for Samples of Your Feces - jessaustin
http://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/the-nsa-is-not-asking-for-samples-of-your-feces
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krapp
They don't have to ask. I'm sure the sewers are brimming with genetically
engineered cybernetic cockroaches constantly scanning our feces for genetic
identifiers and trace electromagnetic signals, beause the NSA has slowly been
slipping silicon and rare earth magnets into our food in order to allow them
to van-eck phreak us through our orifices. The entire American military-
pharmacological complex is a part of it, as is Dole, and Mrs. Bairds, and
American Standard, because who really names a toilet company that anyway?

The terrifying thing about what i just wrote is if it's not actually true, it
probably will be soon.

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bifrost
I should point out that if you do send anonymous samples of your feces, they
will look into their DNA database to send it back to you with a lab fee.
Possibly presenting the bill on your taxes.

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jessaustin
When Booz Allen sets up an office (probably someplace handy like Hawaii or
Greenland) to receive these samples, will the package-openers make $122k or
$200k?

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mtgx
No, but they'll probably get all the digital medical records.

