
Ask HN: How do you remember names? - nahcub
I just went to a conference and it was bad. I forgot the names of people I met not more than 15 minutes later. I felt terrible that I didn&#x27;t know their name while they knew mine.<p>Do you all know of any good tips for remembering names?
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coffeecodecouch
Most of the time you don't actually "forget" names, your brain never even
registers them to begin with. Next time someone introduces themselves to you
take a moment to stop worrying about what to say next and actually focus on
the name. It helps if you link that name to a distinct physical property of
the person in your mind. I _highly_ recommend reading "You Can Have an Amazing
Memory: Learn Life-Changing Techniques and Tips from the Memory Maestro"[0]. I
followed the techniques described in that book and the result absolutely blew
my mind.

[0] [http://www.amazon.com/You-Have-Amazing-Memory-Life-
Changing/...](http://www.amazon.com/You-Have-Amazing-Memory-Life-
Changing/dp/1907486453)

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jimeh
Personally I have to visualize the person's name in my mind written out in
plain text, then I remember that visual image of their name and associate it
with an image of their face.

This isn't a technique I read about somewhere, it's just what my brain has
been doing at least since I was 7 and learned how to read and write.

Typically when I try to remember someone's name, I'll see the first letter of
their name in my mind and it's enough for me to recall and say/write their
name. Other times if I'm having difficulty remembering their name, given some
time (5-60 seconds typically) I can generally recall their name by reading the
image of their written name I originally memorized. Often this reading is more
of a hint towards a the concept of a common name I know of (like Alex, John,
Maria, etc) meaning I don't need to recall and read it letter by letter. While
if it's a more uncommon or obscure name (like Agnomemnonas, or Urania) I
generally have to recall and read it out letter by letter.

Personally I think it ties into the fact that I memorize everything in a
visual and three dimensional way.

I tend to have conversations about how people remember names, specially with
new people I meet, and as far as I recall, I've only met one person who
memorizes names in written form in their head. However a lot of people I've
met tend to not remember people's names till they see them written on
paper/screen, so they'll try to write people's names down at some point if
they don't get a business card with the person in question's name written on
it.

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lutusp
> Do you all know of any good tips for remembering names?

The secret to remembering people's names is to actually care about them. This
is why I can never remember people's names. :)

Imagine you've been told that your favorite programming language has some new
useful features, recent examples in multiple languages include lambdas and
list comprehensions. Guess how long it will take for the new feature's names
and syntax to be permanently branded onto your brain cells -- ten
milliseconds?

People who actually care about other people have the same reaction to meeting
someone new who they might like or find useful as a professional contact --
that person's name is instantly and permanently branded onto their brain
cells.

But if you've spent your professional life in abstract pursuits --
mathematics, science, programming -- it's very hard to make a transition to
giving people's names enough importance to remember them. But guess what?
People from the humanities have the opposite problem -- they can't remember an
equation or a scientific fact for more than a few seconds.

A professor of ichthyology once said, "Every time I remember the name of a
student, I forget the name of a fish."

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hashtag
Not sure if this works for everyone but I try to say their name out loud at
least once or twice when they introduce themselves then if it's a name of
someone I already know, I mentally try to picture that person next to this new
person.

Alternatively before parting ways, I'll try to say their name again for good
measure or be honest and ask them for their name again and let them know I
have a terrible memory

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hansy
This happens to me more often than it should. A very small thing I do to help
remember a person's name right after they introduce themselves is to
immediately use their name in my follow-up sentence(s).

Example:

Bob: I'm Bob. Nice to meet you!

Me: Hey Bob, I'm Hans. What brings you to the conference?

I think most of the time I reflexively say some appropriate greeting without
thinking too much about it. By using the person's name, I force myself to
insert something new into an otherwise mechanical response.

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notduncansmith
I just grab their face, stare into their eyes, and repeat their name 7 times.
Funny thing is, people don't seem to have trouble remembering my name either
:)

~~~
danieltillett
Lol - I am sure the police know your name too :)

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closed
I associate what seems like the main component of their name with an object,
and then imagine that object interact with the person.

For example, if someone's name was Mike, I would picture them singing into a
mic (say, at karaoke). Then, if you can't remember their name, try to recall
what you imagined them doing. Once you get into the habit it is fairly quick
and doesn't disrupt introductions.

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lordsheepy
The trick I learned was to repeat the person's name to yourself while taking
note of their eye color. Makes you stop just long enough to really set the
memory in place and seems to be positive eye contact as well. Another thing I
do is if it is a networking function, I will continue conversations with new
people:

"Yeah, Ellen and I were just talking about the merits of [subject here]"

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petervandijck
I constantly forget names. I feel pretty bad about it. But attempting to
remember them seems like such a huge effort.

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kevando
1) Set a goal and remember at least that. 3 people for example. 2) Repeat
their names in conversation to show reinforce the memory and show you are
capable of remembering names 3) Dont be shy about asking someone their name
again. We all forget. Can't ask twice though, thats bad

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fsk
When I start a new job, I take notes on everyone's name, along with a coded
physical description. (coded, in case anyone else reads it they won't be
offended, usually just the first letter of the descriptive word I'm using)

However, that only works with 5-10 people, not a large group.

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ibstudios
Associate the name with something you know. I make a mental note and associate
right after the person says their name. The problem is that you aren't paying
attention and you need to force your mind to remember. Use strong memories for
the association.... tv shows you love, etc.

Best of luck!

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xpop2027
Mattan Griffel, co-founder at One Month (YC S13), has an excellent post on how
he remembered everyone's name in his batch: [https://medium.com/medium-
redef/5481606b087a](https://medium.com/medium-redef/5481606b087a)

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RollAHardSix
Concentrated effort starting in your everyday life. It becomes easier over
time.

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thaumaturgy
I've had to develop really good name & face recall for my work. I have
probably a couple hundred or more names, faces, and short tidbits stored up in
my head, and can remember at least temporarily just about everyone I want to
at a conference or other.

1\. First, look at the person. Remembering someone's name helps a lot if you
can remember one thing about them. A lot of people don't have a very memorable
face, but most people have something about them that's unique: do they stand
with hips forward, wear velcro sneakers, have a beard, walk with a limp, have
working-man hands, crow's feet next to their eyes, a specific hairstyle...?
"That guy, Nick" becomes "That guy, Nick, who's tall and thin and has a really
easy-going smile who holds his head back on his shoulders a bit and tends to
wave his hands when he's talking." Now Nick's a unique person to you.

2\. Listen to the person. Remembering someone's name is even easier if you can
remember two things about them. Why are they at the event? What do you have in
common with them? What gets them excited? Don't try to remember their life
story, instead pick just one thing that stands out for you and associate it
with the physical person and their name. "That guy, Nick, who's tall and tin
and has a really easy-going smile who holds his head back on his shoulders a
bit and tends to wave his hands when he's talking, especially when he's
talking about Python. He does some geocoding work that I don't really
understand."

3\. If you really really want to remember someone, make contact with them. Not
necessarily physical contact (like a handshake, not my favorite thing), but
join in on the conversation, make eye contact, have a couple of words back and
forth.

This also trains you to pay attention, and as others pointed out,
inattentiveness is probably a big part of why it's so hard to remember people
you've met. It's easy to just glance at someone and not commit anything to
memory, and that's probably what happens most of the time.

Finally, when there isn't stuff going on, I'll spend a few seconds going
through everyone in my head. If it's less than an hour since I've met them, I
can usually work out any details I've forgotten. I have a kind of mental
yearbook, and I go through it: "face & name & bio, face & name & bio, face &
name & bio, face & ... blank? Wait, their name was Dave something, he liked
embedded systems programming, he had a common last name, oh yeah, Dave
Smith..."

It's the pop quiz effect: you're more likely to remember something longer if
you've had to recall it at least once since committing it to memory.

edit: Oh, and don't be shy about forgetting something about someone! Being
stressed out because you can't remember someone's name can make it a lot
harder to remember the next person's name. And, odds are, they don't remember
your name either, so being up-front about forgetting can put them at ease too.
"Hey, we met just a while ago, we talked about ______, I can't for the life of
me remember your name though."

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jesusmichael
I dont

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doubt_me
Pay attention.

If you have to try to pay attention your not doing it right

