
Hire HN: Designer for simple dating site - kyro
Hey HN,<p>I'm looking for a designer to help shape a small dating website I'm working on.<p>You should be knowledgeable in Python/Ruby/Perl/PHP/SQL/LISP/C/C#/.NET/CSS/HMTL/JS/Ajax and have at least 5 years experience with each. But really, CSS/HTML/JS/Ajax is fine too.<p>If you're interested, I'd like to see some of your past work.<p>You're more than welcome to reach me at kyro@kyrobeshay.com / kyro at irc.freenode.net #startups / kyrobeshay on AIM.<p>Thanks.
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swombat
How insensitive! I have 5 years of experience with
Python/Ruby/Perl/PHP/SQL/LISP/C/C#/.NET/CSS/HMTL/JS/Ajax, but now I feel
totally over-qualified for this gig.

~~~
joe_the_user
Jokes and real job advertisements are a REALLY, REALLY bad combination.
Remember, you are joking about the _real_ prospects for someone's future...

~~~
gruseom
Right, no one would ever want the prospect of humor in their future.

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kyro
I guess there's some confusion as to whether this is a legitimate post. It's
real. I'm really looking for a designer. Forgive my attempt at humor as that
part may have come across as a real requirement. That's not the skill set I'm
looking for, but css/html/js/ajax is.

Sorry again for any confusion.

~~~
sosuke
I had to re-read the posting a few times before catching the real skill-set
listing at the end of the joke portion. For what it's worth the "is it a
joke/real job posting" and follow-up joke replies has kept your posting on the
first page for some time. I would consider it an accidental success.

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yan
A Python/Ruby/Perl/PHP/SQL/LISP/C/C#/.NET/CSS/HMTL/JS/Ajax/COBOL/ARM
assembly/INTEGRITY OS/PMP/Oracle/Solaris/Forth/FreeBSD Rockstar Ninja!

~~~
aaronblohowiak
Hmmm, but you don't have any SAP or PeopleSoft experience, so how do we know
you can handle real enterprise apps?

~~~
yan
I can handle real enterprise apps because I'm a lean six sigma black belt,
clearly.

~~~
aaronblohowiak
Six Sigma Black Belt vs Scrum Master ... a battle to the deathmarch.

~~~
RossM
What? No MUMPS experience?

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BigCanOfTuna
I'm your man! If hired, my remuneration should be $100.000 a year/25%
bonus/matching 401k contributions/limousine service/catered lunch/flexible
work hours/office with window/personal secretary. But really, the
$100,000/year is fine too.

~~~
aaronblohowiak
$100k/year would not be overpaying a highly talented designer.

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jmtame
Dear Sirs:

We have studied your project description and we will develop your website with
unique and eye-catching style in functions , and in look . as we have designed
so many sites ,so we are sure that we would provide the best solution for your
needs. We have enough expertise in asp ,.net, sql, flash, multimedia ,
e-commerce, java, ajax, etc.

We can give you a package of $125.00 if you take a decision within this week.
Rest assured of full satisfaction for which we would strive We do not merely
speak of satisfaction... we assure escorted delivery of satisfaction with
"EXCELLENCE".

We have already pitched for your valued business. We would appreciate if you
could provide us your contact details.

We look forward to working together with you on this project.

[taken from an actual proposal i've received on elance]

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fizx
user: kyro, created: 708 days ago, karma: 1505

Eh, a little over the top on that ad, but he's actually a an active member of
the the community, so the ad's not just another drive-by. Cut a little slack?

~~~
run4yourlives
You'd think after all that time he would have learned something about the
community.

~~~
aaronblohowiak
Would <joke></joke> tags have been more appropriate ?

~~~
run4yourlives
Yes, coupled with a submission form action prefaced by www.reddit.com.

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vaksel
seems like everyone and his sister wants to start a dating site, someone
should just come up with a CMS solution and sell it for $299/mo.

~~~
GavinB
There are several. Dolphin is one: <http://www.boonex.com/products/dolphin/>

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joe_the_user
Do you mean web designer or web programmer?

The skills you list are for a web programm and an HTML programmer
respectively. Designer sometimes have HTML skills but are primarily oriented
to creating the look of a site, often using photoshop images. Programmers
implement an existing look. Html programmers create static pages and web
programmers create dynamic pages. There some designers who will do their Html
but most designers wouldn't put Html forward as their primary skill (I
believe).

Just to help you clarify your search...

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khangtoh
Pardon me.. but why is this on the front page?

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physcab
I might pay for a good grad school dating site

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tapiwa
Why would a designer need to know all that.

Troll right?

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dw0rm
I'm willing to work, but would you hire a Russian? :)

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korch
Thank you for your extension of job oportunity. Firm my am working with have
many done dozens of dating sites of clients on rentacoder.com, scriptlane.com
and others. Complete dating site, best feature, turn key, all satisfied
guarantee. Our team of 47 programmers in Mumbai waiting to start for your
command. Total cost will be $150 USD.

~~~
korch
Also need to mention we can have the complete job done in 6 days.

~~~
swombat
Won't fly. Can you not do it in 3 days? We need to launch soon.

Also, we can only afford $75.

~~~
paraschopra
Also, don't think 47 programmers would be enough for this project. We need
atleast a hundred.

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chiffonade
I didn't know this was a joke until I read the comments.

Call me jaded.

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mroman
hmmm

A "designer" "knowledgeable in Python/Ruby/Perl/PHP/SQL/LISP/C/C#/.NET . . .
JS" sounds interesting. I think what you are looking for is a developer. Also,
watch the "simple" in the title, the word "simple" in a description like that
usually translates to "we are scum, and want to rip you off by suckering you
into believing the job is straightforward, which it will be be anything but,
and even if it was, we will make sure it isn't, I mean, we want to see you
work for the pittance we will eventually pay you, you technology people have
it too easy! what do you mean you are going to charge me FIFTY DOLLARS to just
sit there and press a couple of keys?"

~~~
peterhi
Hey be careful there. Last time I pulled this guy up for his bullshit my karma
went negative. There are people here who thinks that he is some sort of
rockstar ninja fighter pilot sniper beast of a entrepreneur who's
twitter/craigslist mashup is going to set the world on fire.

~~~
chiffonade
I have no idea why you're being downmodded, that description is hilariously
cynical.

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ahoyhere
I get your joke.

But... you want a designer but don't list design - of any type - as a desired
skill?

Mmmmmkay.

