
Public speaking is tough - FredericJ
http://speaking.io
======
nostromo
Here's two pieces of public speaking advice nobody will tell you about, but
actually work.

1) Beta-blockers. Ask your doctor.

2) Alcohol. Obviously, be careful with this. :) But having a drink really will
take the edge off. This works better when giving a toast as a best man than it
does at work. It could probably work at a conference too.

Other than this, for a big talk or pitch, I just practice until I'm blue in
the face, then I practice some more. If you experience a fight or flight
response, your brain cannot think straight, but you can fall back on something
that has become rote long enough for you to regain your footing.

After 30 seconds or so, your body will start to calm down, you just have to
make it through that 30 seconds without pulling a Michael Bay.
[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_tqRyzTvNKE](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_tqRyzTvNKE)

Ask HN: I was thinking the other day, someone should make an Oculus Rift app
that is just a giant conference room of people staring at you. People with
stage fright could use this to practice public speaking and hopefully improve.

~~~
Morgawr
_The most important thing is that after 30 seconds or so, your body will start
to calm down_

This is so true. While I haven't given many speeches in my life yet, I've had
some experience playing in public at concerts (max I had was 500 people
probably so not a huge crowd, but still plenty).

Every time I would step on stage with my band, I'd feel like I locked up,
unable to do anything other than just stare at the crowd. It's not really
anxiety in my case, more like a "oh crap, what if I fuck up?". Thanks to
practice with the other members and eventually having fun (once the music
starts), you tend to forget it all and just get into action. The same happened
during my graduation speech, once you start the only option left is to get to
the end.

More often than not I got to the end of a concert thinking "that was all?"
because time really flies when you put all of yourself into doing a very
focused thing (and speeches aren't that different, at least in my experience).

Also, the best thing you can do to recover from stumbling is to just keep
going. If you realize you have screwed up something, just keep going and
everything will be fine. The thing you definitely don't want to do is to lock
up and freeze. The moment you freeze you know you have failed. The worst
experience to me was during an acoustic solo part when a string in my guitar
broke, I was just there, standing in front of a crowd and then silence. We
just laughed it off and kept playing (with a substitute guitar), but it felt
terrible for those first couple of seconds.

ps: shameless plug if somebody cares, here's my band:
[http://www.youtube.com/user/HavenlostBand](http://www.youtube.com/user/HavenlostBand)

~~~
TheLegace
Sweet I thought I was the only metalhead on HN.

~~~
bjelkeman-again
I think there are plenty here.

~~~
livatlantis
Yep. Some of us are lurkers.

------
beloch
Everyone probably has some good advice for public speaking. Here's my #1
piece:

 _Slow the fuck down!_

You don't "win" at public speaking by getting more words in. In fact, you'll
likely lose your audience by going a mile a minute. It makes perfect sense,
but it's still _hard_ to do. You can practice your talk in private a hundred
times and it'll be X minutes. You can present your talk to colleagues and co-
workers and it'll be X minutes. Then, when you get in front of a room full of
strangers, the adrenaline will hit, you'll go into manic-caffeine-squirrel
mode, and you'll blast it out in X/2 minutes! Some people deliberately make
their talks too long, knowing they'll finish early if they don't. This is a
mistake. They're just cramming too much material into the time allowed and
will shell-shock their audience. Slow the fuck down!

The method by which you slow the fuck down is going to be somewhat personal.
Different things work for different people. Personally, I do a lot better if
I've gotten to know even just a few people in the room a tiny bit. If I can
get a few people (hopefully in the front row) into the colleague-zone, I can
focus on them during the talk and ignore the strangers.

~~~
JoeAltmaier
Famously Kennedy talked fast because he learned that people can talk at most
~200 words per minute but can understand ~600 (or some such). So talk fast to
keep people's attention.

If you're going to talk slow, make sure you say something worth thinking about
in there, so folks' wheels are turning during the silences. With practice you
can judge where the wheels have got to, and feed right into that with your
next remark.

~~~
beloch
Kennedy doesn't speak that fast compared to people in manic-caffeine-squirrel
mode. He downright ambles through his talks compared to many I've heard, and
he slows down for the important bits too!

Also, comprehension doesn't always result in retention, which is what you
really want your audience to come out of your talk with, unless you're a
politician and you just want to leave an emotional impression like "Wow, this
guy is really great and I'm so happy I'll probably even vote for him again!".
In fact, I bet the very _last_ thing most politicians want is for you to
remember everything they said four years ago! For most of us, public speaking
is about sharing ideas, and if you can say something with fewer words your
audience has a better chance of remembering it.

------
hawkharris
Public speaking became much easier to me once I recognized that all good
speeches follow a concrete formula.

It's kind of like writing. You wouldn't pick up a pen and start scribbling a
lengthy essay without considering its structure.

Similarly, effective public speakers follow a pattern — not necessarily the
same formula, but a formula. For example, Bill Clinton likes to...

1) Begin with a personal, visual anecdote about a specific person or small
group. (e.g. A family walking miles to collect water.)

2) Relate the small example to broader theme. (e.g. Poverty is a big problem.)

3) Weaving that broader concept into the theme of the speech.

Another thing to remember is that while speeches share a structure with
writing, they are not written articles. The biggest difference, I think, is
that people are not capable of processing as much information.

While repeating yourself in a written piece is often bad form, most public
speakers repeat key phrases to keep the audience focused. Listening is usually
harder than sitting down to read.

------
bane
I'm a so-so to "good" public speaker. I used to be a terrible public speaker.
I'll probably never be a great orator or Steve Jobs, but I'm pretty happy with
my presentation skills. In group settings, I'm often the one chosen to give
the public presentation.

Some things that improved me:

1) My university undergrad CS program required a semester of public speaking.
_Everybody_ hated it. It's probably one of the top 3 most important classes I
took. If you're in a school that doesn't require it, take it as an elective.

2) I had a teaching job for a few years. Getting points across day in and day
out, and trying to drag a class along of people at very different learning
speeds teaches you very quickly how to project and enunciate so people can
hear you well. Watching the faces of, and talking to, the people in the back
rows becomes a very important speaking tool.

3) To deal with stage fright, I learned to mentally "not care" about giving
the talk. It's hard to explain, it doesn't mean "not caring about doing a good
job", it just means to adopt a viewpoint of detached apathy. Before I learned
how to do this, even small stumbles would send me into a panic state which
only made it worse ending with an avalanche of stutters and tied tongues.
Detached apathy turns those little stumbles into such unimportant things that
I don't even know they happened until I listen to a recording of my talk or
see myself in a presentation.

4) Practice your speech. Because it's important to look up every once in a
while in order to project. Practicing your speech helps you do that, instead
of looking down into your note cards or your script. I don't practice it
relentlessly like Steve Jobs or President Obama. 2 or 3 runs through is
usually good enough for most of my purposes. But it helps you keep your focus
on not caring.

5) Practice giving speeches. I haven't done it, but I've heard lots of good
things about Oration societies like Toastmasters. In my case I got plenty of
practice while teaching. But for those people who don't have that option, this
is a great option. Nothing gets you used to the routine of giving speeches
like giving speeches.

~~~
manmal
Do you write word-for-word scripts, or just loose collections of keywords?
I've never managed to give a good speech while trying to exactly recite a
prepared script, I either screwed up or it sounded as if I was just reading it
off (vs really talking to the audience). I also struggled to find the current
position in the script when looking down. Completely memorizing doesn't work
since I just can't.

My best talks (based on the feedback I got) have been based on a few keywords
and connecting them with a narrative, live. Free-form storytelling, so to say.

~~~
bane
I totally agree. Coming from a teaching background, I'm much more comfortable
with working off of a loose framework of bullet points, then filling in the
talk with my own anecdotes and narrative.

Still, practicing a few times helps me remember, in a broad symbolic sense,
what I'm going to improvise. It's a bit like jazz or improv comedy. You build
up a body of material and just draw off of it at the appropriate point, using
your bullets or slides or whatever as a "pointer" into your own memory.

I've had to work off of a word-for-word script a few times and it's _very_
hard for exactly the reasons you mention. I remember practicing a speech like
this 20 or 30 times because I kept losing my place in a couple spots in the
speech whenever I looked up.

It's probably why teleprompters are so popular these days. If you watch the
president give a speech, he appears to be looking around, but in fact he
generally looks directly at one of two or three transparent teleprompters.

------
ctdonath
As an introvert, I have no problem talking in front of a large group. I thrive
on one-on-one conversations where each person has an opportunity to talk thru
long complex interesting thoughts without interruption. Speaking in front of a
large group is exactly that: I get to talk at length on a favorite topic, at
whatever level of detail I choose, to someone who is interested in what I'm
saying and will not interrupt; that I'm doing this with 10,000 individuals at
once is just being efficient about it.

Helps that I've decided that if I'm going to be wrong, I'm going to be
_definitively_ wrong.

~~~
themodelplumber
It may also help if you're what's known as an "outward introvert." This topic
is discussed in the book "the highly sensitive person" where introverts are
basically dissected along the lines of "outward" and "inward." I would
consider myself an "outward introvert" (like an extrovert except I pay a bit
more dearly for it after the fact) and have no problem with public speaking,
teaching, etc. I have a good friend who is an "inward introvert" and she
avoids anything even close to speaking to a group.

------
EliRivers
As someone in your audience, I beg you, please do not tell me what you're
going to tell me, then tell me, then tell me what you just told me.

~~~
zenbowman
Agreed, this is the lamest kind of presentation. Humans like stories. Tell me
a story.

Even the best technical presentations play out like a story. Guy Steele's
"Growing a Language" is a classic example.

------
julienchastang
Public speaking has caused a great deal of distress, panic, and anxiety for me
in the past. To remedy this situation, I joined a local Toastmasters club.
They are located literally all over the world, and there is probably one in
your area. I cannot say enough good things about Toastmasters. Through
frequent, repeated public speaking exposure, over time, you become
desensitized so you don't feel as panicked. And your speaking skills improve
as you have to give speeches on a regular basis. I completely disagree with
comments that suggest this problem can be solved through drugs or alcohol. I
had ONE stiff drink before an important talk, and I completely hated the
feeling while I was speaking.

------
bigd
I've a talk in 30'.

Another suggestion should be "do not read suggestions on how to do talks right
before giving one".

after a life in academia, what I usually suggest is: like your topic, keep it
easy, and reharse, reharse, reharse.

------
anildigital
Here is related post by Zach [http://zachholman.com/posts/github-speaking-
culture](http://zachholman.com/posts/github-speaking-culture)

------
yodsanklai
I used to be really scared when i had to give "important" talks, especially in
English which isn't my native language. I was so anxious that I couldn't even
work the days before. I remember my first professional talk. My mouth was so
dry that talking was difficult. (tip to beginners: take a bottle of water).

Interestingly, I had much less problems when I was presenting somebody else's
work.

The thing that really helped me was benzodiazepines (e.g. Xanax). I took them
a few days before until the day of the talk and I felt much much better. I
know these drugs get a bad press, but in my case, they really helped. The side
effets is that they tend to make you sleepy, but it didn't really affected me.

Now, I'm certainly not a great speaker, but I don't have any problems with
public speaking.

------
drblast
Don't think of it as public speaking, think of it as a performance.

You wouldn't go try to perform a play without scripting it and memorizing your
script first, nor should you do that with your presentation. Once you do that
you can ad-lib and it will seem natural. Even the off-the-cuff jokes aren't
really off-the-cuff.

And go twice as slow as you think you should, and pause a lot. When people get
nervous they talk faster and don't realize it. If you're nervous your
perception of time will change and small pauses seem like an eternity. Slow
down and force yourself to break for five seconds between "paragraphs" and
you'll be way ahead of most people.

------
Codhisattva
Practice at Toastmasters meetings.

~~~
i386
Tried to attend my first Toastmasters last night and they didn't show up!

~~~
Blahah
So you got experience of a _really_ bad public speaking situation - the
audience doesn't care enough to come!

------
bedhead
I had never spoken publicly, as in a featured speaker in front of a large
gathering of strangers. I had spoken in front of everyone at my old company
(80 people) but that was the closest I came to public speaking, and since I
knew everyone it didn't count. I remember freshman year of high school having
my stomach in knots when teachers would call on me. I just had that nervous
personality. Want to know how nervous I'd get in public with everyone's
attention on me? I almost fainted at my wedding - at the altar. The priest had
to cut the ceremony in half to accommodate me. To this day people make fun of
me for it (I feel bad for my wife).

A couple months ago, I surprisingly got asked to be a speaker at a pretty
large and prestigious conference in town. It was at a large venue with over
1,000 attendees, some of whom are important to impress for various reasons. It
was a great opportunity so I accepted, knowing that this could be a problem.

Anyway, I rehearsed my 10 minute speech ad nauseum, I could do it in my sleep.
Every little last verbal tic, joke, everything. I knew I'd still be nervous. I
wanted to be so good that I could do it on autopilot and hopefully be more
confident. I got on stage, lights shining brightly, and took a seat as the
host read a brief introduction about me. While he was doing this, I was so
nervous that I thought I was either going to vomit or faint, or some horrible
combination of the two. I was literally telling myself not to puke over and
over again. My stomach was tossing and my head was spinning...I could barely
breathe.

He finishes his intro and I start my talk, visibly nervous. Then a funny thing
happened. About 20 seconds in, something clicked and I just thought to myself,
"Why are you nervous? You know this stuff _cold_. You got this." And wouldn't
you know it, from there on out I _killed_ it. I dunno, it was weird, I
instantly became as relaxed as I am with my friends and delivered a great
speech. I had tons of great jokes, kept everyone really engaged, and I think
even delivered an interesting idea to the audience. By the time it was over I
was actually disappointed it was over since I was having so much fun. I got
tons of superlative-filled compliments afterwards and was really in shock
about it all.

I dont know what the moral is. Just have fun I guess. Know what you're talking
about and the rest will sort itself out.

~~~
nedwin
I think the moral is "practice makes perfect". Nice work!

------
wturner
The easiest way to speak publicly is to actually believe in what you're doing
and talking about. The audience then becomes kind of like an omnipresent
pressure that keeps you going.

If you aren't 'locked into' what your talking about then nothing will save
you. I know from personal experience.

I also heard a talk that if you imagine the audience as 'prey' such as small
rabbits or chickens then it becomes easier as it takes power away from the
flight or fight aspect.

------
treenyc
I have enzyme issue with Alcohol, but I believe that is a nice trick.

From personal experience, and from someone who had tremendous problem with
public speaking to someone who performed very well at a toast master event in
NYC without any preparation. I can say quite a few things on the subject.

One thing is for sure. We are all afraid of other people. No matter who we
are. It is just that fear get expressed in different ways. Some people are
being shy and passive, while some are being aggressive and over-confident.
Until we discover who we really are. Using tricks (power point) and strategies
(drink alcohol/weed) will not take us far.

What made the most difference in my process is some ontological training like
this leadership course. The course doesn't really say that it will help you
with public speaking. Just that you will leave the course

"Being a Leader and Exercise Leadership Effectively as your own natural Self-
Expression"

Nothing more, nothing less.

However, the course has nice side-effects, like public speaking.

The course is NOT cheap, but I consider it worth more than my college degree.
Next one is at Singapore. FYI, I have no financial tight to the course or
University.

[http://beingaleader-singapore.com](http://beingaleader-singapore.com)

------
pmiller2
Between grad school (teaching, seminar talks, etc) and other occasions, I've
spoken in front of groups of 3-300 people hundreds of times. I have no idea if
I'm all that good at it, but at least I'm comfortable with it. :-)

The biggest trick for me is realizing that talking in front of a group is
different from talking to one person, but talking in front of a small group is
not that different from talking in front of a medium or large group. Under 5
or so people is still pretty much an intimate/conversational atmosphere in my
experience, but going from 5 or 10 up to 50, 100, or 300 is pretty much all
the same. The only real difference is the amount and type of projection
equipment involved.

Depending on the specific scenario, there are other things I try to keep in
mind (e.g. I found that between 0.5 and 1.5 slides per minute worked well for
a seminar talk in grad school), but abstracting away the size of the audience
in my mind is the one that's paid me the biggest returns in reduced anxiety.
Now if I just had a way to make sure the A/V equipment always worked, I could
make a crapload of money. ;)

------
chops
I've given a handful of talks at miscellaneous user groups ranging from 5
minute lightning demos to one way-too-long-but-there-is-too-much-to-cover-
in-45-minutes talk about Erlang types (I felt bad it was so long).

While I'm the last guy to walk up to a stranger and strike up a conversation,
and I break out in cold sweats preparing to cold-call prospects for my
business, I've always had this thing about public performing, whether it be
speaking, playing and instrument, or even (gasp) _singing_.

I'm not sure of the psychology of it all, but it feels like the pressure of
presenting, combined with a strong fear of being viewed a failure gives way to
a certain comfort zone in presenting. And once up there for a minute or two, I
notice that I quickly find myself firing on all cylinders (probably from the
adrenaline), and then everything from then on becomes quite natural for me
(even if my natural presentation style comes across a little neurotic).

Anyway, that's my anecdotal contribution to the public speaking discussion.

------
eflowers
What I've learned is that 20 minutes in, you're hour is up.

------
aniketpant
Nobody mentioned Speak Up. It's a wonderful community of people where everyone
helps each other out in planning and preparing for talks. It's been slightly
inactive recently, but every mail gets an assured response.

Link: [http://speakup.io/](http://speakup.io/)

------
gumby
To me there are different scales of public speaking or presenting.

I actually have no problem presenting to 500 people (the largest audience I've
had): I just talk, and try to make some eye contact. There are always a few
friendly faces.

Presenting to up to a dozen people is no problem for me: I can adapt (speed up
/ slow down, skip over stuff, dive deep, repeat, whatever) depending on how
the people react.

But there's an excluded valley of somewhere between one and three dozen. I
feel weird just presenting as I would to 500 people, yet it's too big to get
the intimate preso treatment. When I have presented to a group this size it
has almost always fallen flat.

~~~
joshvm
That weird valley is essentially where you become a high school teacher. Most
of the time if you're talking to that few people, it's because you're trying
to give a lesson in some form or other.

I've spoken in front of large groups of students of all disciplines, large
groups of business types and small to mid size groups of scientists. Large in
this case is several hundred.

Undergrads get bored easily, but you can make it fun. Scientists are hard,
simply because they know their stuff and get a knack for asking really
annoying questions, the ones you didn't quite prepare for. Business people are
simple in principle - everything has to be dirt simple (could your Mum
understand it?) and usually to the point (what are you selling and why?). The
hard part for business talks is that usually you can't be remotely technical
because people will tune out.

With very few people it's easy to be flexible - odds are you know them
reasonably well or you know enough about them that you can throw in a bit of
banter, make it fun and respond to their queries well.

Larger groups you're just a drop in the ocean. The bigger the talk, usually
the less time there is for interaction. So you can do your spiel, have a
couple of short questions and leave. I find they're fairly easy as everyone
blurs together.

In between is hard. You're acutely aware if people get bored - they won't hide
it like small groups. You may have to answer fairly involved questions too.
The only way, as ever, is to practice and make sure you know what you're
talking about back to front.

------
re_todd
I went to a doctor, and he gave me beta blockers, which helped a lot.

Another thing that helped is reading forums like this where many people admit
how nervous they are. In speech class, everyone seemed to do relatively well,
so I was under the impression that I was the only person in the world that
gets nervous during a speech. Just knowing that other people get nervous has
helped me handle it better.

You can also take your contacts out or glasses off so you cannot see people
clearly, which also helps a little.

I've also noticed that my anxiety attacks usually happen before the speech,
not usually during it, and they only last a few minutes. Knowing that they
will not last forever has also helped me.

------
alan_cx
I assume there are different reasons for people fearing public speaking. But,
FWIW, my thing is to really and fully know the subject you are talking about.
For me, the nervousness comes from the fear of being found out in some way.
So, I find that if I know my subject, Im quite happy to waffle on to who ever
wants to listen, but if I know or think the audience might know more than me
and be able to some how show me up to be some sort of fraud, Im a bag of
nerves.

I dont know if that works for anyone else, but my theory is that the nerves
come for the fear of somehow looking a fool, and that becomes less likely the
more you know about what you are talking about.

~~~
bigd
Your theory is probably correct, however, the solutions is to accept "nemo
potest omnia scire". (orazio?) - nobody can know everything -.

------
pessimizer
Public speaking terrifies me. I seem to do alright if I follow five rules:

1\. Don't bail and run out of the room screaming.

2\. Don't ramble. Don't leave your outline for an anecdote or further
explanation - trust your outline to be good. If you have to meander because
you did your outline at the last minute and you know it kinda sucks, if you
then meander while meandering, you've lost the game and no one remembers what
you were talking about.

3\. Don't "umm," "right," or "ok." before and after anything you say.

4\. Don't laugh at your own jokes (at least don't do it before you finish
getting them out.)

5\. Remember that you don't look as nervous as you feel.

------
Theodores
Just wing it. _Seriously._

Why is it that so few schools teach children how to speak in public?

It is not difficult, all you need is a debating society.

I am fortunate enough to have gone to a school where the debating society was
_the_ thing to do. Even on a cold winter with snow outside two hundred or so
of the thousand at the school would show up, of their own accord and without
anyone telling they had to go. To be voted by your peers onto the committee
for the debating society was the ultimate in status. Our debating society made
public speaking a fun thing to do.

As well as being able to propose/oppose a motion from the stage with a self-
prepared speech it was also possible to learn how to listen, ask questions
from the floor and respond to points made.

So, when I left school, I had a head start. I had spoken in front of a crowd
on two hundred or so occasions from a very safe sandbox. In my adult life this
experience has been invaluable. I know about what happens if one is not
totally prepared. I know what happens if one is over prepared - i.e. reading
instead of talking. I know about posture and how to make meaningful eye
contact with a sea of faces. However, most importantly, I knew that public
speaking was a desirable thing to do, a privilege.

If anyone reading this has kids and their kids are not involved in a school
debating society, think about it. Get together with the school and a few
teachers and sell them the idea of a debating society. Get someone charismatic
- a head teacher who has to present in front of all the kids - to make the
debating society the most important thing he/she does. Your local posh school
will have a debating society, visit them, learn how they do it and steal their
procedures and organisational structure.

Then, if you are lucky and the school debating society kicks off and becomes
_the_ thing to do, your child should grow up to be a darned good public
speaker. What they will learn from that will help them no end. If they also
end up knowing a subject inside and out at some stage of their adult life they
should be able to literally wing it without having to use any of the silly
suggestions presented on this thread (betablockers - you must be kidding!!!).

~~~
jasonlotito
> Just wing it. Seriously. > Why is it that so few schools teach children how
> to speak in public? > It is not difficult, all you need is a debating
> society.

Speech and Debate was, by far, the class in high school that has done more for
me than any other class. The ability to stand up in front of people and start
speaking is powerful. The ability to think of a topic and speak interestingly
for 10 minutes on the subject is powerful.

Doesn't matter that I still have to remind myself to slow down or stop pacing
or make eye contact or whatever else. People ask me how I learned to do that,
and I always tell them about my Speech and Debate class.

The Foreign Extemporaneous Speaking I did during debate events in high school
was wonderful. I still remember may favorite comment on a judges sheet. They'd
told me that when I started speaking and shared my position, they disagreed
immediately and thought I was wrong, but after those seven minutes, I'd
completely changed their mind. That, for me, was the highest praise I could
obtain.

Today, the ability to speak in front of people on the spot makes me more
confident to speak up. It makes me more confident in so many areas of my life.
I agree, schools fail to recognize how important that skill is. They don't
realize how often it becomes useful in one's life.

I was lucky. My school wasn't the largest, but we had a full debating team,
and frequently attended events throughout the year. But yeah, spot on. Get
your kids into speech and debate. It will serve them the rest of their lives.

------
jccalhoun
As someone that has and is teaching public speaking my number one tip: sound
like you care.

I can't tell you how many terrible speeches I've sat through where the person
was saying "this is really important and means the world to me" but sounded
like they didn't care at all.

Number two: don't write out ever word of your speech. It is public speaking
not public reading. Being able to read a text out loud without sounding like
you are reading is a skill and you should learn to speak from notes/outlines
first because that is easier to sound like you are talking with us rather than
at us.

------
AhtiK
Exhale as deeply as possible and keep it this way as long as you can. After
that breathing restores with first few rapid big inhales. Restarting your
breathing this way is also restarting your brain in a way so the thinking
becomes calm. Works every time.

Another tip is to eat 1-2 bananas half an hour before the event and maybe a
glass of fresh orange juice. Banana works as a natural beta blocker reducing
anxiety. While on stage, plain water, no juices..

------
hakanson
Where can I submit a pull request to remove the F-word from these otherwise
great tips, or do I need to fork. One could consider "dropping the F-Bomb"
against many conferences code of conduct pertaining to "harassment includes
offensive verbal comments." Also, as we try and mentor more youth to code,
including school age girls, is this the persona we ware marketing?

------
peteri
For talks to user groups where I'm generating new slide decks and demos one
piece of advice I was given was reckon on around 1 hour of prep for each
minute of speaking time. The successful stuff that I've done seemed to match
this.

Also for a one hour time slot you'll probably actually want around 40 minutes
of material allowing time for introductions and a Q&A session at the end.

------
ismaelc
If you have something exciting to talk about, public speaking is not such a
chore (a joy in fact). The challenge is having content that's easy to make
exciting.

If that's not possible for you, then try to get excited of the fact that
you're out there to excite the hell out of something mundane. Surprise your
audience.

Being in that state of mind alone should knock out the jitters.

------
cmbaus
Here are couple ideas I've written on the topic:
[http://baus.net/i-don%27t-like-public-
speaking/](http://baus.net/i-don%27t-like-public-speaking/)

I did quite a bit of public speaking in the past couple years and it gets
easier over time. I think the best advice is prepare, prepare, prepare.

------
mebassett
Say someone is a mediocre-to-decent public speaker already. How does one
"level up" to be a really great public speaker? I've thought about a speech
coach or class, but I don't know anyone who has had any success with this who
could recommend where to find a good one.

~~~
zenbowman
Speak more often.

Either find an avenue to speak (internally at your company, or at local
conferences) or attend a local toastmasters in your area.

My goal last year was to do some public speaking at least once a month. I only
managed to speak 5-6 times during the year, but that was a lot better than the
year before that. This year I think I will be able to hit the "speak at least
once a month in public" goal. Speaking is a skill, and the only way to improve
is practice.

------
chaz
Plant your feet and square your shoulders to the audience. Walking around is
ok, too. But slouching and shifting your weight from left to right can hurt
your confidence as well as hurt the way your confidence is projected. You'll
develop your own more natural style over time.

------
crimsonalucard
The only way a phobia can be conquered, if it can be conquered at all, is
through repeated exposure.

------
janogonzalez
Shameless plug, here it is my own advice regarding conference speaking:
[http://janogonzalez.com/2013/12/02/conference-speaking-
how-t...](http://janogonzalez.com/2013/12/02/conference-speaking-how-to.html)

------
city41
_blatant plug:_ I'm working on a website aimed at increasing social skills and
one "track" of the site will be for improving public speaking --
[http://metamorf.us](http://metamorf.us)

------
reuven
I have been speaking professionally for a number of years now. In a given
week, I'm probably speaking 2-4 full days (minus lunch and breaks), teaching
various programming languages and technologies. I also give talks at
conferences and user group meetings.

I remember very, very well when I had to give a talk oh-so-many years ago,
while doing a student internship at HP. I flubbed it big time, and left the
room saying to myself and anyone who would listen that I disliked public
speaking, and was bad at it.

I'm not quite sure when things changed, but I think that it had a lot to do
with my attitude. Instead of worrying about whether people would like me or
believe me, I instead concentrated on trying to teach people something they
didn't already know, and have a good time in the process.

If I'm enjoying myself while speaking, then the odds are good that the people
in the audience are enjoying themselves, too.

If I've learned something interesting, then the odds are also good that the
people in the audience will find it interesting, too, and will be glad that
I'm sharing it with them.

Again, I'm not sure when my attitude changed, but when I get up in front of an
audience now, I feel like I'm there to have a good time. Of course, I don't
want to flub things, and there are times when I worry about that more than
others. But for the most part, it's a matter of thinking, "Hey, everyone here
has the same goal -- to enjoy themselves and learn something."

As others have written, your enjoyment will be enhanced significantly if you
prepare. I'd even say to over-prepare. You probably need to know twice as much
as you will actually say in your talk, so that you can speak naturally and
reasonably about the subject. Try to outline your talk as a story, with a
beginning, middle, and end. In technical talks, the story will often be
something like, "Here's a problem. Here's a solution. Here are some examples
of the solution in use. Here's where the solution fails. Questions?"

Don't worry about your slides too much. Yes, they should be high contrast.
Yes, they should be easy to read. But I think that people worry way way way
too much about colors, fonts, and images, and not enough about the actual
SPEAKING. You want people to be engaged with what you're saying, not with
what's on your slides... and that's going to happen if you have interesting
things to say.

Above all, be yourself. There are oh-so-many examples (in real life, and also
in movies and on TV) where people are told that they should open with a joke,
and so they tell a ridiculous joke that no one finds funny, including the
presenter. If you're naturally funny, or are willing to have people not laugh
at your jokes, then go for it. If you're a serious kind of person, then be
serious. (Although it's always better if you can be somewhat silly, in my
book.)

~~~
JoeAltmaier
Over-preparation is poison to me. I come off wooden, and get very nervous
about attending to the script. I present much better when I'm speaking to
simple notes, with only a few carefully prepared phrases to introduce topics.
Like everybody, I used to be petrified of speaking to groups. Now I like to
say I can talk on any topic to anybody for 10 minutes with a few moments'
preparation.

~~~
reuven
Oh, I should have been clearer about this: When I say "prepare," I don't mean,
"write everything down that you want to say." I agree, that doesn't work well
for many people, including me.

Rather, I meant that if you're giving a talk on a subject, try to research it
beforehand to a far greater depth than you'll actually be addressing in your
talk. That way, the stuff that you talk about will seem relatively simple to
you, compared with the knowledge that you've accumulated on the subject.

FWIW, I never write any speaker notes. I want the talk to be a natural
extension of me and my knowledge, not something artificial that I'm reading,
as if from a teleprompter.

------
Kerrick
Another great resource: We Are All Awesome!
[http://weareallaweso.me/](http://weareallaweso.me/)

------
gre
Tell them what you are about to tell them, tell them, tell them what you told
them.

~~~
welly
> Tell them what you are about to tell them

Where's the element of surprise?

> Tell them

Yes, tell them.

> Tell them what you told them.

If they were listening then they'd know what you told them. Fuck 'em if they
weren't listening.

------
saurik
To some extent the point I want to make I'd similar to the one made by reuven
elsewhere in this thread, but I think it is still different (and maybe
shorter? we'll see ;P) enough to still post. (OK, after writing, this failed
at my goal of being shorter ;P.)

So, I also do a lot of conference speaking, albeit nowhere near as much as
reuven. I remember in high school, public speaking was terrifying. By the end
of college, I was giving one of the graduation speeches.

The difference was not me becoming better at making arguments or telling
stories or being prepared or building slides or really anything about what I
said on stage: the difference is that I felt at home there.

In essence, I had the fear of public speaking that many, if not most, people
have. This fear is mostly about people watching you and judging you. You are
concerned about where they are looking and what you are doing: it paralyzes
you.

It had very little, however, to do with what you are doing in front of
everyone: you could be on stage being told "eat breakfast as you would on a
normal day" or simply a lunch meeting where you are standing due to lack of
chairs while everyone else is sitting.

I don't feel, therefore, like helping people present is the solution. I will
say that it might try to ease the person's anxiety enough to consider doing it
once, but that isn't why they are afraid: I am not afraid of bungee jumping
because I think I'm going to die due to the cord breaking, I'm afraid of
bungee jumping because even looking at a photograph taken from a high-up
location makes me curl into a ball.

These fears can be so bad that they aren't obviously fixable (phobia-level
fears can be like that). In my case, I likely have acrophobia (heights), but
as something of a "class clown" when I was much much younger, I can't ever
claim to have had glossophobia (public speaking). My fear was mild, and I
tackled it.

I want to be very clear, though, that there is a difference between
"preparation" and "lack of fear": if you told me to go stand on stage right
now in front of a thousand people, I'd be happy to do that. I would be willing
to try to entertain them. I might fail, but I don't mind anymore.

I might thereby recommend more doing something structured that tales away all
of the "things you can do wrong" variables entirely before bothering with
trying to prepare those away: take an acting class. You are told exactly what
to say, you have a director guiding your movements, and on the show day a
perfect performance can be identical to the previous day. You don't have to
worry if what you are saying sounds stupid: you have no choice in what to say.

(That said, I wouldn't "recommend" it strongly, as I think a lot of these
shortcuts in hindsight by people who have defeated something others find hard
are missing the point of what made it work for them: that you probably just
need to be doing it, constantly, for long enough, to make it easy. This is
similar to the "monad tutorial fallacy" in my mind.)

Then, when your fear of being in front of people is gone, maybe the
preparation isn't even that big of a deal: if you are comfortable, the
audience will be comfortable, and you can "get away with" a lot more on stage.

I mean, preparation is great, but "public speaking is tough" is not because
"writing slides is tough" or "answering questions is tough", it's simply tough
because "public anything is tough"... you answer questions every day in the
hallway: you don't need more preparation to do that on stage, you just need
less fear (which again: isn't easy).

~~~
theraccoundude
This is incredibly well articulated. Fear is the number one issue to overcome
for most people, not how to construct their presentation. If you have A LOT of
fear going into speaking, this is the essential blockage which must be
understood and overcome before anything meaningful can proceed. There are a
lot of patterns of thought that go into the construction of a phobia-level
fear of speaking which might be so strongly habituated that they simply take
time and exposure to overcome.

Meditation with observation of narcissistic personality reflections will
slowly start to ease the internal dialogue that generally contributes to this
state. Like most people, when you are natural (like around your best friend)
your creativity and gifts naturally come out. You don't need to be trained on
them (though sometimes that can help a bit too)

