
I Gave My Child Autism - anotherevan
http://www.backfromnature.org/2015/03/i-gave-my-child-autism.html
======
salgernon
There seems to be a movement to accept any and all behaviors of children on
the spectrum, and from the comments on this otherwise excellent article ("I
resemble that remark!") there are people that see any interventions or
attempts to treat these children as abusive.

My six year daughter is asperger (or would be if that were still distinct) and
frankly her behavior is not just disruptive but absolutely horrible - she
tantrums, bites and hurts anyone around her when she can't properly
communicate her current "need" \- and that need may be something completely
unreasonable like ordering that the Santa at the mall be immediately removed
from her vacinity.

Not all behaviors of autistic children - or adults - is ok and to be be
cherished as a "difference". There are some behaviors that are fine -
obsessions about dinosaurs, say, but there are many more that must be
addressed before the child enters society. Smearing yourself with poo is NOT
one of those differences that should be embraced.

Sorry, ranty after an afternoon having the shit kicked out of me because I
wouldn't forward the Harry Potter audiobook to the correct precise instant she
wants.

~~~
DanBC
> There seems to be a movement to accept any and all behaviors of children on
> the spectrum,

I would be interested to see comments made by people who use the diagnosis to
excuse poor behaviour. (Edit: I reworded this to be less confrontational and
less angry. Sorry for original wording.)

I am aware of people struggling to get more acceptance of neuro diversity.
That's because they're fed-up of being mocked (if lucky) or murdered (less
lucky) by police

[http://www.inquisitr.com/1726930/alabama-police-officers-
rec...](http://www.inquisitr.com/1726930/alabama-police-officers-recorded-
mocking-special-needs-children-at-a-local-learning-center/)

[http://www.alternet.org/civil-liberties/5-times-police-
kille...](http://www.alternet.org/civil-liberties/5-times-police-killed-
people-mental-disabilities)

[http://www.courthousenews.com/2011/06/29/37770.htm](http://www.courthousenews.com/2011/06/29/37770.htm)

> DAYTON, Ohio (CN) - Dayton police "mistook" a mentally handicapped
> teenager's speech impediment for "disrespect," so they Tasered, pepper-
> sprayed and beat him and called for backup from "upward of 20 police
> officers" after the boy rode his bicycle home to ask his mother for help,
> the boy's mom says.

It's not really surprising that neuro-atypical people are getting militant
when they're faced with widespread discrimination that causes shorter, less
good, lives.

~~~
salgernon
My wife would probably be better able to respond to specific websites and
discussion as she's been far more involved in the online communities
surrounding our daughters disorder. I've asked for some links from her, but
there were several comments in the linked article that seem to suggest
accepting neuro-diversity warts and all.

Believe me that I'm tickled by my daughters extreme interests - but we DO want
to cure her of her disruptive and dangerous behaviors.

We have called the sheriffs office during one of our daughters most extreme
tantrums - they couldn't have been nicer or more understanding and helped us
out considerably during their visit. I suspect our county sheriff (Santa Cruz,
ca) has had extra training in that regard.

On the other hand, we have also had to deal with child protective services,
called because of bruises noticed by the school. We got the third degree, but
since we've also had to do a lot of video recording of her tantrums, it was
pretty easy to establish that - aside from our having to restrain her, her
bruises were self inflicted.

On her good days, she's a joy and a wonder. On her bad days, she's a beast
from the nether pits of hell. But we will stick by her.

~~~
maratd
> On her good days, she's a joy and a wonder. On her bad days, she's a beast
> from the nether pits of hell. But we will stick by her.

I don't understand this. Shouldn't the behavior be constant?

Have you been able to coax good days out of her by changing the environment,
food, your behavior, etc? Can you predict the bad days? Is there a pattern?

~~~
bsder
> I don't understand this. Shouldn't the behavior be constant?

Spoken like a programmer. _Adults_ aren't even consistent. Ever seen a woman
going completely apeshit at a male for some reason (sometime justified,
sometimes not)?

Biological organisms have significant variations. Sometimes you get an angel;
sometimes you get a devil; sometimes both.

In the past, resources were sufficiently scarce that children (and adults) who
weren't capable of fitting into society were killed or allowed to die.

~~~
needacig
> Ever seen a woman going completely apeshit at a male for some reason
> (sometime justified, sometimes not)?

Why would you use that example?

~~~
bsder
I needed an example of an adult giving an emotionally based, uncontrolled
outburst.

I have easily seen a dozen or more incidents of women doing this in public. I
have only ever once seen a man do this.

I suspect the imbalance is because men prone to this behavior resort to
violence privately. Strangers will step in to help a woman but not a man.

~~~
needacig
I've never seen a woman do this so I suspect this is just your stereotype-
based expectations biasing your interpretations. Peoples' memory of events are
notoriously unreliable and extremely susceptible to the power of suggestion,
like the suggestion that women are more prone to emotional outbursts, which is
an age-old trope. [http://www.theguardian.com/media/mind-your-
language/2012/mar...](http://www.theguardian.com/media/mind-your-
language/2012/mar/08/mind-your-language-feminisation-madness)

------
nether
What does "autism" even mean today? I've heard it used to describe everything
from awkward introverts with technical interests, to kids who are nearly mute
with speech disabilities. Do anti-vaxers think they're saving their kids from
becoming software engineers?

~~~
bshimmin
I share your frustration. Autism, Asperger's Syndrome, "on the spectrum" \-
these words and phrases all seem to mean precisely whatever the person saying
them wishes them to mean, from a pseudo-sympathetic acknowledgement of
someone's problems to a cutting dismissal of behaviour they find unpalatable
or challenging; and all delivered, of course, without any clinical frame of
reference.

I miss the days when people could just be shy or awkward or irritable or even
narcissistic without it eliciting an armchair diagnosis.

~~~
laumars
I think you're missing the point of what "the spectrum" is. Let's take another
example, dyslexia. Some people suffer considerably worse than others; and some
people's dyslexia is so mild that it might never be formally diagnosed. The
same is true for autism. It's not a simple black-and-white case like someone
having a broken leg. There's a gradual curve of disability that ranges from
the _" has to work a little harder to get along in every day life"_ to the
extreme cases were 24/7 care is required.

As to why it might appear that different people refer to different things when
using these terms: that might just be because their reference points are from
different points along the scale. Or in some cases, they might just be
ignorant but vocal bloggers; but sadly this happens in all aspects of science
(eg the anti-vaccination campaigners spouting shit doesn't mean that doctors
don't know what they're talking about when they promote the use of
vaccinations).

~~~
maratd
You're missing his point. At what point does a personality trait become a
disorder?

~~~
wvenable
When that trait interferes with your daily life. It's pretty common for people
to be afraid of heights but if that fear interferes with getting a job, having
relationships, enjoying everyday activities, then that's a disorder.

The problem is lay people think of "autism" the way that creationists say
evolution is a "theory". An awkward introvert with technical interests isn't
going to be professionally diagnosed as autistic unless they have some pretty
serious and defined symptoms. But that doesn't stop misinformed lay-person
usage in everyday conversation.

~~~
wpietri
My issue with that attempt to define a disorder is that it can medicalize
mismatches with artificial environments. (That is, almost all environments
humans live in.) It in effect defines all deviations from "normal" as defects.

Imagine you're living in a culture of subsistence agriculture. And imagine
further that you are thin, quiet, nearsighted, physically delicate, and are
inclined to spend all your time reading. You are basically unsuited for the
available jobs, nobody wants you in a relationship, and what everyday
activities are available are ones you don't enjoy. So the village headman
decides that you have a disorder and need treatment, by which he means regular
beatings. Of course, you might make a fine librarian, but that's not an
option.

The same thing was done with gay people for ages. Or women; note how female
hysteria was a medical diagnosis that eventually vanished:
[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Female_hysteria](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Female_hysteria)

As another example, quite a lot of American children end up medicated because
they are inconvenient for overworked teachers in classrooms that follow
industrial models of education. A friend of mine was once a substitute teacher
in a class where every single student had been diagnosed with ADHD and was on
medication. The daily life that their trait was interfering with is entirely
artificial. At some point I think one has to wonder whether the problem is the
trait or the constructed environment that the trait isn't a good match for.

~~~
jostylr
I work in a Sudbury school where we have two kids diagnosed with autism. When
they first arrived, they had some problems. But in the free environment of our
school, they have become as amazing as all the other children in the school. I
don't even think of them as being autistic.

We all have deficiencies. What we all need are environments that let us figure
out how to cope with them.

Of course, it is all matters of degree and people need to be able to take
responsibility for their actions and needs. Not all can and that requires
something different.

------
judk
This article is weird.

1\. The bizarre * in "retardation", as though it's a slur like "nigger".

2\. It overplays "now we know it's all autism". The whole point of "autism
spectrum" concept is that it's a name for a basket of symptoms that are NOT
understood by current science. We don't have reliable biological tests yet
(but there are some great correlates), we don't know the mechanism, we don't
now how to reverse it. All we know are some ways to help people meet their
life goals by learning ways to work around the skills they lack.

The article has the feel of someone with an extreme-seeking personality: he
swung from an extreme homeopathic anti-scientist to an extreme "sciencist",
assigning magical powers to "science", not understanding what science actually
says.

~~~
kelukelugames
retard has been on the last of no no words for a while now. Lots of co-workers
really dont like it. cant tell if i'm on the wrongside of history but i really
need a word for when my friends do something stupid.

~~~
brighteyes
"Retard" as a derogatory term and/or as a slur is indeed offensive, and people
are using it less and less. It's best to avoid it. If you're still using it,
you are on the wrong side of history. Find another word instead.

But "mental retardation" is a clinical term that is perfectly acceptable, and
to bleep it for fear of saying it or spelling it out, is quite ridiculous.
This is the first time I've ever seen it done, in fact. It's as silly as
bleeping out "Niger river" because it is similar to a slur and shares some
amount of etymology.

~~~
tempestn
In fact the reason why "retard" is offensive, is because it is taking a term
for a mental condition ("retardation") and turning it into a slur. It's
similar to how calling something "gay" in a derogatory manner is offensive.

With "retard", the derogatory use became so much more prevalent than the
clinical that even the latter was overshadowed and began to take on a negative
connotation (at least, for many people).

------
DanBC
This article makes a point about mis-diagnosis. It's an important point. Look
at dyslexia. There are a bunch of different reading disabilities, but school
children are mostly tested for dyslexia. If they have dyslexia they get a
bunch of help. If they have some other reading disability, well, it's hit or
miss whether they get the help or not. So some people with mild dyslexia are
geting copious help, while other people with moderate reading disabilities are
not getting any help.

This is why accessibility is important. The people who meed the help and who
need the assisstive tech might not be able to get it. So, please, do remember
accessibility.

------
wvenable
My son has sensory processing disorder and, it turns out, so does my wife. She
was never diagnosed as a child and even though it affects her every day, we
never understood it until now. My son also has a host of behaviors that come
directly from me. I was also never diagnosed with anything as a child.

------
guscost
> In fact, the majority of scientists believe that there is no “autism
> epidemic” at all—that people with autism are no more common than they were
> 20, or 50, or 1,000 years ago.

This seems very possible. Although a fiction, there is a good example in the
Aubrey/Maturin novels by Patrick O'Brian _(Spoiler Alert!)_ :

Dr. Maturin's daughter is born while he is away at sea, and it is strongly
suggested that she is on what we call today the Autism Spectrum. Naturally, as
a legendary doctor ahead of his time, he recognizes that she is not mentally
retarded (or an "idiot" in the language of the period). He prevents his less
enlightened contemporaries from essentially trying to beat the condition out
of his daughter, and takes measures to provide an environment where she can
thrive.

------
DiabloD3
As an guy with Autism, this is an absolutely great read.

~~~
FrankenPC
Aspergers here. Great read. My dad had it really bad. It's amazing in
retrospect how much everyone adapted their lives around my dad to compensate
for his abhorrent behaviors. Not one person said: "Maybe he's got some kind of
psychological disorder". That was the hardest part growing up in my household.
The not-talking about it.

~~~
woah
What were his abhorrent behaviors?

~~~
scoggs
I'm guessing here that he was nasty and rude as a few students I've worked
with were. The real kicker though is that they don't realize what they are
doing or saying at all. With adults maybe it's a bit less pronounced but when
kids act like that to each other you will hear about it whether verbally or
through tears.

~~~
throwawayaway
nasty and rude = autistic now?

god help us all.

~~~
robwilliams
That's not what they said at all; they said they some autistic students that
were nasty and rude without being aware of it.

------
chrismcb
What is with the misspelling of retard? Is it so someone can't search for it,
or because of the connotations behind the word? Why even use the word at all
then? Why not just use one of the other many socially acceptable terms?
Personally I find spelling the word this way is a bit offensive. It's as if
you are saying you want to use it, but you know it is wrong, so you will just
slightly use it.

------
empressplay
Beautiful story and so rare of a parent to be willing to own their child's
condition this way. That's one lucky kid.

------
narrator
Ok, Saturday night rant time:

The most curious things about autism is that

A. There isn't much data on prevalence outside the U.S.

B. The rise is hand waved off as better diagnosis by autism skeptics.

C. Looking at causes of autism has been stigmatized because of the anti-vax
controversy.

We'll still be sitting here 20 years from now because nobody really wants to
get to the bottom of this. Maybe the people who don't use that brand of
whatever essential consumer good that causes autism will be the only people
who will make it past the next generation and it will effectively breed autism
out of the population that way. A whole bunch of people subsistence farming in
Africa most likely.

This almost reminds me of Bruce Sterling's story "Sacred Cow" from "A Good Old
Fashioned Future" where everybody in Britain and the west dies of mad cow
disease and the Indians who don't eat cow take over the world.

~~~
kpil
I think the situation is very similar in Europe.

One interesting thing is that here in Sweden we have a rather large group of
refugees from Somalia that have refused vaccinations because they have been
rather heavily afflicted by autism. (Several times higher) Interestingly it
appears that it does not help - so vaccines can be pretty much rules out, at
least as a single cause, just by looking at this a-b test.

There is quite a lot of research on this:

One research study on this group suggested that it might be related to the low
level of vitamin-D in the group, caused by the low level of sunshine in
Sweden, combined with that the women is covered for religious reasons.
Elisabeth Fernell have published a few articles on this.

~~~
narrator
So is anyone doing a vitamin D supplement trial for expectant mothers? I
wonder how long they'll just leave that speculation out there before anyone
tries an experiment. I'll push the snooze button on this one. Society doesn't
seem to need a better answer on this than "More diagnosis" or "Because they're
muslims".

------
elmerland
Wonderful story!

------
hudell
Great, now I think I may have it too.

------
russianbandit
I don't understand why autism being genetic disproves whatever the anti-
vaccination camp says. Do they actually say that the only cause of autism is
MMR vaccine? I wasn't aware of that.

~~~
zo1
I was under the impression (and I could be wrong) that the anti-vaccine
individuals are keen to blame anything on vaccines, not just MMR.

On a side note, until we have cold-hard evidence that there is a direct link
between vaccines and disease X, I am going to clump these individuals in the
same group as "naturopaths", "homeopaths", "gem/magnet/chakra healing
advocates", whatever. I know I exaggerate a little at this point with the
names, but I really have no respect for willful unscientific beliefs. Even
more so when they decide to inflict these beliefs on their innocent children.

Like these people:

[http://wonkette.com/580153/paleo-chefs-baby-food-book-
pulled...](http://wonkette.com/580153/paleo-chefs-baby-food-book-pulled-
because-it-could-kill-babies-unfair)

[http://www.bubbayumyum.com/](http://www.bubbayumyum.com/)

------
SQL2219
[http://healthimpactnews.com/2014/cdc-responds-admits-
omittin...](http://healthimpactnews.com/2014/cdc-responds-admits-omitting-
vaccine-data-linking-vaccines-to-higher-rates-of-autism/)

~~~
Intermernet
I just had a quick look around that site and I wouldn't be referencing it as
an argument against anything except good research practices.

They seem to love providing all sorts of links to the publications that back
up their arguments, but none to the data they are claiming to refute. This
leads to the illusion that they know what they're talking about, but they
don't link to what they're actually refuting.

------
joering2
I stopped reading after this "Now dedicated advocates for vaccines and
evidence-based parenting"

Suure. If you pro-vaccines then you're "evidence based" mature parent. If you
against, you're a monster.

For every story like this you will find counter story of children getting all
sort of diseases BECAUSE of vaccines.

Internet if full of good read, here is an example:
[http://cid.oxfordjournals.org/content/48/4/456.full](http://cid.oxfordjournals.org/content/48/4/456.full)

~~~
zadroz90
What was the point of posting that study? I'm genuinely curious what your
interpretation of it was.

~~~
Hytosys
The conclusion of that paper confirms in a very convincing format that
vaccines do not cause autism. It explicitly shames the OP with "Further
studies on the cause or causes of autism should focus on more-promising
leads."

I, too, am genuinely curious.

