

Heading Out on Your Own: 31 Life Skills in 31 Days - ginozola
http://artofmanliness.com/2012/09/01/heading-out-on-your-own-31-life-skills-in-31-days-series-wrap-up/

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datr
I liked the section titled "Good manners are not stiff, formal, or awkward."
It reminded me of a story I was told of a dinner party at which one of the
guests suffered from cerebral palsy. The host seeing that the guest was having
trouble with her knife and fork immediately put down her own cutlery and
started eating with her hands. Once the guest noticed this she felt she had
leave to do the same. The story's a good example of "people over process".

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splat
I remember a similar sort of story, though it's probably apocryphal. The
Japanese ambassador was dining with Queen Victoria at a very formal dinner.
Towards the end of the dinner, the guests were given a small bowl of warm
water with which to wash their fingers. The Japanese ambassador, being unaware
of what to do with it, drank the contents---a major faux pas. The Queen,
seeing this, drank hers as well, and all the guests then did likewise.

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Robin_Message
In line with these stories, my parents always taught me that good manners are
about making your guests (or host) feel comfortable. The rules are not the
important bit of manners.

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kahawe
> _In line with these stories, my parents always taught me that good manners
> are about making your guests (or host) feel comfortable. The rules are not
> the important bit of manners._

This is so funny you should say this because in Germany good old "Knigge" is
becoming more popular again but in a way of making yourself feel better about
your good manners AND as a foundation to look down on and sneer at others for
their clearly inferior manners. So quite the opposite of what you described.

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jiggy2011
The advice about budgeting is good common sense. On the other hand I feel that
sometimes people address personal finance as a simple arithmetic exercise
(income - expense), whereas I think it is sometimes better treated in a more
algebraic fashion.

In other words identify the variables in your balance sheet (Hint: everything
is a variable) and try to anticipate what happens as things change. Your
finances are affected by changes outside of your control, for example the
government or local authority can decide to stick your taxes up, changes in
the commodities market can affect the price of staples such as a food and fuel
or your electric company might read your meter and then slap you with a bill
of double your usual amount.

This is something that I find annoying about the UK, whilst all of the high
street banks offer some form of online banking none of them to my knowledge
will allow me to pull out the raw data and play with it. I'm sure that using
some fairly rudimentary statistical analysis I could gain much more insight
into the implications of my financial situation.

For example, let's say I get a pay rise. I might be inclined to celebrate by
going out and buying a brand new iPad or whatever. But maybe if I sum the
amount that I spend at the supermarket each month I notice an upward trend
that will wipe out the pay increase within 6 months. Does this mean that I am
acquiring "good taste" in a few too many areas or does it simply mean that
"cost of living" is increasing faster than inflation and I need to account for
that.

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JackDanger
Since this doesn't relate to 'manliness' at all but merely maturity as a
person, it seems appropriate to post this translation:

[http://artofwomanliness.heroku.com/2012/09/01/heading-out-
on...](http://artofwomanliness.heroku.com/2012/09/01/heading-out-on-your-
own-31-life-skills-in-31-days-series-wrap-up/)

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SonicSoul
this is great. i esp wish someone encouraged me to make an effort and "Day 22
- Learn how to small talk".

growing up i hated small talk and this translated very well into hobbies
involving staying home and hacking things, and later doing that at work.

it wasn't until much later that i realized how important it is to make real
human connections and be able to interact with strangers. This seems to be
harder to get right the older one gets.

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natep
For anyone that wants to read these posts in an RSS reader one day at a time,
I suggest Feed Playback [1]. Just enter the feed URL [2] and a start date of
2012-08-01. Unfortunately, the feed is mixed in with every other update that
gets put on the site, so it will take longer than a month to complete.

[1] <http://www.streamspigot.com/feed-playback/>

[2] <http://feeds2.feedburner.com/TheArtOfManliness>

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peter_l_downs
This is awesome — I just recently moved out of my parents' home for the first
time and have been doing my best to adjust to life "on my own". Thanks for
posting this.

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alanbyrne
None of these articles seem to be about women or sex... interesting.

I got this book for my 18th birthday, and it was invaluable in shaping me into
the person I am today. I don't quite understand why it costs £65 on Amazon
though: [http://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Be-Man-John-
Birmingham/dp/187598...](http://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Be-Man-John-
Birmingham/dp/1875989285)

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mmanfrin
AoM is one of the few blogs that I feel genuinely compelled to read. Very good
writing, and about skills/knowledge that we all need in our life (regardless
of profession).

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tgrass
It's a sad state of men when day 15 is How to Change a Tire, when it ought to
be how to fix one: <http://www.alpharubicon.com/bovstuff/tirepluguzi.htm>

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CamperBob2
Tires should be patched, not plugged (and only when the hole is nowhere near
the sidewall). I've never had a tire plug hold, or a patch fail.

Patching them can still be done at home but I've always let the guy at the
garage do it, because he sees a couple of cases a day instead of one every 3-4
years like I do.

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tgrass
Each of the tires on my old Chevy at one point had over a dozen plugs. Each
plug lasted several years.

The beauty of a plug is the kit is five bucks, comes with about a dozen plugs
and you can use it anywhere. Get a thirty five dollar compressor to run off
your battery and you can fix a puncture by yourself in the middle of nowhere.
Not so with a patch.

But then I also won't drive more than twenty miles from my house without a
toolbox...so....

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CamperBob2
So you're driving around on a public road (presumably) on tires that have been
damaged and repaired 12 or more times.

Oooooookay. Thanks for the heads-up.

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tgrass
That was in back country Alaska (note the past-perfect tense). Every man for
himself and all that.

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ohashi
The most relevant one I saw and read was the Networking one. I think a lot of
people I meet (or see at networking events) need to read that.

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mukaiji
oh... how i wish i would have read "Living With Roommates Tips" beforehand.

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vishaldpatel
The article on stress management should be listed first.
[http://artofmanliness.com/2012/08/30/heading-out-on-your-
own...](http://artofmanliness.com/2012/08/30/heading-out-on-your-own-
day-30-how-to-manage-stress/)

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taroth
In #13 Networking: >"If you’re in San Francisco looking for a tech job, you’ll
want to be using the latest connection apps"

I've never seen this in the LA community. Is this the norm up north?

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akldfgj
That's just SV navel gazing.

