

Twin Lessons: Have More Kids. Pay Less Attention to Them. - cwan
http://blogs.wsj.com/ideas-market/2011/04/11/twin-lessons-have-more-kids-pay-less-attention-to-them/

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nostrademons
I remember reading Pinker's _The Blank Slate_ in college and being struck by
how little parents mattered. The numbers were that roughly 40-50% of the
variance in adult outcomes was due to genetics, 0-10% was due to parenting,
and about 50% was due to peer groups.

Of course, one could argue that parents indirectly choose their kids' peer
groups. So maybe the lesson is to lighten up on the little battles of
parenting, but pay very careful attention to the neighborhood you live in, the
schools your kids go to, and the activities they partake in. And make enough
money to have options for all of those.

~~~
jerf
I'm not sure how to reconcile the idea with reality, though. Is it possible
that part of the reason that the twins turn out so identical is that despite
all the other differences, two middle-class upbringings are pretty much
indistinguishable in the ways that actually matter, whatever they may be? What
if we take triplets, put one in the worst inner city, one in middle-class, and
one in a very rich household. Will they still turn out nearly identical?

If yes, then doesn't that ultimately imply that being in the worst inner city
has nearly no effect on how you turn out? But that seems to contradict
reality, unless being in the inner city is genetic, which seems fairly
unlikely at this point.

I mean these as thought-provoking questions. I don't have answers. I don't
question the results of the studies, which are very well grounded and as I
understand it well-repeated, but on the other hand it does not seem as obvious
to me as the author here how to map them back to reality.

~~~
nostrademons
Isn't this exactly what some of those twin studies have done? Looked at pairs
of identical twins where one was adopted into a family of wildly different
socioeconomic status?

Anyway, the article (and the studies) did say "Over the long term", as in
leading into adulthood. While I'd have trouble believing that being raised in
a bad inner city ghetto has _no_ effect on your adulthood, I wouldn't have
trouble believing that many intelligent, hard-working kids (the ones who don't
get shot, at least) manage to escape the ghetto.

I'm reminded of something I've often heard about homeless people. People can
end up homeless for all sorts of reasons, most of them not their fault. But
the ones who _stay_ homeless are almost invariably mentally ill. If you have
the coping skills of a normal human being, homelessness is a rather unpleasant
few months that you can eventually put behind you. But if you _don't_ have
those coping skills, that's when it becomes chronic and you get stuck on the
streets.

Also the studies did say only 40-50% of the variation was attributed to
genetics. The other 50% is peer group. People generally have a tough time
going friendless, yet that's often what's required to escape a bad situation.

~~~
jerf
"Isn't this exactly what some of those twin studies have done? Looked at pairs
of identical twins where one was adopted into a family of wildly different
socioeconomic status?"

I know there is a non-zero number of such studies, but I don't know how many
there are vs. relatively similar socioeconomic situations, nor do I
immediately know where to go to answer that question in any reasonable period
of time. Info welcomed.

------
noonespecial
It may be true that my parents didn't have all that much to say about who I
was going to be as an adult, but the made a _huge_ difference by providing me
with an endless stream of (what to them at the time must have been
ridiculously expensive) computer gear, books and electronics kits. They might
not have changed my final destination, but they certainly helped me get
started faster.

~~~
tseabrooks
Maybe parents don't change the direction of the vector but rather they can
influence the magnitude of the vector?

~~~
orijing
I think that's exactly what he was wondering.

------
nl
It's interesting that he noted a number of times how his wife disagreed with
him. I wonder how child-rearing responsibilities were shared?

The cynic in me sees a working husband coming home tired to a exhausted wife
who has been at home looking after twins all day, and then justifies his lack
of interest in getting the kids out of her way as a premeditated parenting
strategy rather than exhaustion/laziness.

It's true that he says _Someone had to feed our infant twins in the middle of
the night, and that someone was me._ \- but as someone who _did_ work part
time to take care of my kid I'm very much aware that nigh feeds are very far
from the hardest thing to do.

