
Ask HN: How can I stop forgetting “things”? - shubhamjain
No matter how much I try I can&#x27;t stop forgetting where I kept my stuff, spending a lot of time looking for frivolous stuff. Recently, for the third time I lost my ATM, and I just can&#x27;t recall  where I might have lost it, despite being rarely careful about keeping the card in my wallet.<p>It is really an annoying problem for me. Any solutions?
======
rloc
My solution is to build habits. I wear only 3 things, wallet, keys and phone
each always in the same pants pocket. When one's missing I notice right away.

When I remove them from the pants they're always gathered in the same place.
When I remove a thing from the wallet I always put it back in the exact same
slot.

~~~
raldi
I've noticed that every time I walk through an exterior door (in either
direction) I unconsciously tap my pockets to confirm the presence of the
things that are always supposed to be in them.

~~~
warfangle
Be careful with doing that in crowded public places. It's a helpful behavior
to you, but its also a helpful behavior to pickpockets.

~~~
lunchables
I carry 3 thigns: keys, phone, wallet. Each in a different pocket. I tap both
front pockets using both hands at the same time, then repeat for back pockets.

So essentially I've told a pickpocket: I keep things in my pockets. Not sure
what new information I've armed him with.

~~~
infinityplus1
You have given him indication that you have something in your pocket worth
saving from getting stolen. That's pretty big.

~~~
dpark
Do you often have things in your pockets _not_ worth saving from being stolen?

If it's in your pockets, is probably at least moderately valuable. Wallet and
phone area obviously valuable. Keys might be. Those are the only things a
pickpocket is likely to expect from your pockets, and tapping your pockets
probably doesn't change that

~~~
infinityplus1
Suppose you are the thief. In a crowd of people, no one but one person is
touching is pockets to check something. You will be attracted to that person
and become curious as to what is in his pocket. He's the odd one out.

~~~
dpark
Probably not. The guy who is checking his pockets just seems like a riskier
target.

~~~
infinityplus1
Good idea. That balances out.

------
barefoot
Reduce stress in your life if possible, it can negatively impact memory:

[https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Effects_of_stress_on_memory](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Effects_of_stress_on_memory)

Get more meaningful (and the right amount of) sleep, lack of sleep or too much
sleep will negatively impact memory as well:

[http://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/little-sleep-much-
affect-...](http://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/little-sleep-much-affect-
memory-201405027136)

You are exercising regularly, right? If not, you may be missing out on a
subtle way to improve your memory as well:

[http://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/regular-exercise-
changes-...](http://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/regular-exercise-changes-
brain-improve-memory-thinking-skills-201404097110)

What are you eating in your diet? Reduce the amount of foods - like steak -
that increase LDL and change your drinking habits to increase or decrease your
alchohol consumption to one drink a day:

[http://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/boost-your-
memor...](http://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/boost-your-memory-by-
eating-right)

------
edw519
Have less stuff.

This may seem like a snarky answer, but I'm deadly serious...

Your mind should be spending it's energy processing important thoughts, not
constantly doing read-seeks for the "frivolous". It's trying to tell you
something. Listen.

Do whatever you have to do to make that transition as much as you can. I did
years ago and it's probably the best thing I ever did to improve my ability to
get things done.

~~~
icebraining
For some people, "two" is too much stuff to remember.

------
mariogintili
You'll never stop forgetting "things". It's just impossible, unless you suffer
from having an eidetic memory ->
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eidetic_memory](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eidetic_memory)

Although personally, I used to forget a lot of things :( you can learn
mnemonics to remember/recall more things easily. Reading this book really
helped me(fun to read too) [http://joshuafoer.com/moonwalking-with-
einstein/](http://joshuafoer.com/moonwalking-with-einstein/)

------
davelnewton
I used to use an acronym: KWiK (Keys, Wallet, Knife)

Have a single place you put things, and put them there as soon as you're at
that place. I put a small shelf by the door for the wallet and keys, the
knife/multi-tool is an always-carry.

Now that I also carry a small flashlight at all times I'm in search of a new
acronym, but mostly for completeness--once the habit was built it's almost
never a problem anymore.

The phone still gets forgotten on occasion, but it's rarely an issue.

------
ajinkyapatil
Be mindful of where you place stuff after you use them. Decide on fixed places
for all your stuff and make it a point to place them there after you use them.

Its not about remembering where you kept stuff, rather more about where you
keep stuff in the first place.

------
meesterdude
When things have a home, you know where they live and can go find them. My ATM
card lives in my wallet. Whenever I take it out for something, it always goes
back when it's done.

My wallet is usually in one of three places, although when it's not it's
visually easy to find.

I used to sometimes leave my house without my keys and would lock myself out;
or would be afraid I lost my wallet accidentally while I was out. So I bought
a chain wallet, and attached my keys to the other end. So now I know if i've
got my wallet I've got my keys, and vice-versa.

In short, having some systems, reducing or limiting (or simply defining) the
homes of things, can go a long way.

~~~
8note
I lock the door when I leave the house, requiring me to have my keys by the
time the door is locked.

------
itchyouch
This is an unintuitive connection, but if you aren't already, try to get more
sleep. Memory is generally dulled with lack of sleep.

Another detail that goes hand in hand with reducing sleep need is exercise and
nutrition (green veggies).

~~~
micahbright
And take some fish oils. DHA is brain food. I think there may be(admittedly
tenuous on this one), a brain benefit to coconut oil. Also, try fasting(shown
to increase BDNF when entering the ketotic state).

------
cromulent
I've just started reading "The Organised Mind" by Daniel Levitin and it seems
that there will be answers in that book.

"...memory retrieval requires our brains to sift through multiple competing
instances to pick out just the ones we are trying to recollect. (...) This is
why it's difficult to remember where we left our glasses or car keys - we've
set them down in so many different places over so many years that all those
memories run together and our brains have a difficult time finding the
relevant one."

~~~
bizzleDawg
I'm about half way through this at the moment - I'm sure a lot of the comments
here are completely independent, but most could have easily cited this book!
e.g. having a system/habit for things which need to be remembered, reducing
the number of things to keep track of, eliminating distractions are all
discussed/suggested in the book.

------
Zekio
My solution was to have less things I can forget all over the place, so now I
only have a phone and wallet on me and everything else goes into a bag, if I
need more than phone and wallet.

~~~
apryldelancey
I agree - less things. Simplify!

------
tathagatadg
As people have mentioned already, its definitely about forming habits. 2
things that are helpful in doing that are lists and alarms. My understanding
is that we forget things because our attention, at that moment is focused on
something else other than what we are supposed to be doing. We have fantastic
alarm systems for getting nutrition or getting rid of waste materials from our
body - but alas nothing for products of our thoughts. Lists are great tools
for refocusing thoughts. So start with lists. Put it contextually, like on the
back of door or the place where you keep your shoes if you want to remember
what you should leave the house with. Then add alarms to add the space and
time awareness. Check some IFTTT recipes or set location based reminder on
your phone to go over the checklists. What would be challenging is refocusing
from the current context to what you are supposed to when the alarm goes off.
Don't be too harsh on yourself - remember its a leaky bucket by design :P

------
marcoperaza
I've noticed that some ATMs make it near impossible to forget your card by
requiring you to take it before dispensing the cash. Even better are the ATMs
that just let you swipe the card. I wonder why that's not standard on all
ATMs.

There was a particularly bad ATM near my college that did the worst possible
thing. It would hold your card during the transaction but then dispense it
_after_ the cash. The tellers inside the bank emptied the machine of forgotten
cards regularly and kept them in a box behind the counter. They had to dig
through a lot of cards to find mine, so this was snaring lots of people. I
don't understand why you'd design an ATM that way.

These days I'm just hyper-aware of this. The "walking away from ATM" thought
immediately leads to the "do you have your card" thought. Just like checking
for wallet, phone, and keys when leaving a place.

------
hannele
How you get better at anything: practice.

Try to catch yourself the next time you put your ATM card somewhere other than
in your wallet. Try to catch the moment where you think "I'll just put this
here for a second so I can juggle this other stuff", and instead, put it in
your wallet.

It's tough. I'm still constantly looking for my phone when I've left it in an
odd place. If I'm distracted on my way out the door, I might forget it
altogether. Making it my wallet has helped - one less thing - but I have had a
few embarrassing moments where I've taken everything _but_ my phone and have
needed to ask a favour.

Best of luck in the struggle!

------
entelechy
Having a system is definitely a solution. However, maybe you have in reality a
different problem than forgetting "things". Let me ask you, did you ever knew
where you put your things?

Most people's mind is quite capable of remembering things. The problem is, we
are creatures of habit. We are used to execute routines automatically and
unconsciously. This is a problem as often it's hard to recall things which are
perceived or done unconsciously. So, maybe you want to try to do things - live
your life - more conscious and mindful?

------
rdfi
Healthy lifestyle will do wonders for your memory. Try to keep your stress
levels down, eat right and sleep well. Memory can be trained too. Look up
Dominic O'Brien or Tony Buzan. Their books are a bit sensationalist, but the
techniques work, e.g. you'll quickly be able to memorize a full deck of cards.
Don't know if that kind of training will improve all aspects of memory, but it
certainly won't hurt

------
SQL2219
Some old gas stations used to require you to get a key to use the restroom.
The key was sometimes wired to a hubcap, or some other ridiculously large
item.

------
chippy
This may seem like a petulant response, but it's one that most therapists
would initially ask:

Have you tried to remember them?

~~~
JonCox
Is that the therapist equivalent of 'Have you tried turning it off an on
again?' ;)

------
SQL2219
Counting is a shortcut I use sometimes. For example: instead of focusing
exclusively on the 6 specific things I want to get from the grocery store, I
remember the number 6. Then before I checkout, I ensure I have at least 6
items. Works for short lists, not so much for long lists.

------
ssarkar
1\. Exercise 30 minutes daily. 2\. Sleep 8+ hours. Plan for 9 hours of sleep -
that is how you might actually get 8 hours. 3\. Don't read
newspapers/twitter/facebook - too distracting. Read books, long articles
instead.

------
LarryMade2
Make a place for everything, the ATM card goes here (period)

Do that for important stuff and follow the rule to put things back in the
places where they belong and you wont have to worry about looking for it.

------
elorant
Perhaps you’re too freaking busy and that’s your real problem, not forgetting
per se. I’d suggest you take some time to chill out. Go for a long walk. It
always works for me.

------
nextweek2
You might want to get checked out at a memory clinic.

They have tests and coping strategies regardless of age.

------
drtz
Get rid of all your other crap that is concealing the things you actually need
or want.

------
blazespin
Do you have sleep anea? It's proven to cause memory issues.

------
soribsalc
Have you tried using a Bluetooth tracking beacon like TrackR?

~~~
inetsee
I've tried using these things in the past. They're too bulky for some
purposes, and when the battery dies you're out of luck.

My bigger problem is not forgetting where I've left things, but forgetting to
take things with me when I leave the house. I've often had to turn around and
go back to the house to get something I've left behind.

~~~
matas8
My tip: when you know you're gonna leave the house, prepare for exit earlier.

------
k8tte
too much stress and/or reefers will reduce your cognition

------
hamhamed
I don't think anyone has a problem where they lose stuff so quickly that they
need to make a thread about it (though it is getting upvoted).

My best tip is to put ur things next to things u can forget. Do you go outside
without shoes because you forgot to wear them? Didn't think so, so put ur keys
or "ATM" inside your shoes.

Simple stuff like that... put things u keep losing next to things u never
lose.

