
When your manager isn't supporting you, develop a manager crew - JoshTriplett
http://larahogan.me/blog/manager-voltron/
======
ejcx
I've worked and had roles where I had a non-existent manager.

If it is really really that bad, it's a much better outcome to leave amicably
versus fighting to fix the issue. Remember that software is a very small
industry we all work together in.

There's no candid way to fix your manager's behavior if they are non-existent,
or completely detached from their team. Especially if your manager's manager
does not care or know.

~~~
GuiA
Indeed. I did not have a ~great~ manager until my 3rd or 4th job, and if I had
known people like that existed before I certainly would not have stayed as
long in some of the earlier jobs.

~~~
rejschaap
I had a really great manager on my 1st job, but due to limited experience I
did not recognize and appreciate it at that time.

Not that it would have changed my decision to leave, the commute was terrible
and I wasn't willing to move.

------
sixtypoundhound
Huh?

If your boss isn't supporting you, GTFO. Either to another group internally or
another company.

No offense, but most of this it putting lipstick on a pig. There's no cure for
laziness or bad intent.

Don't waste your time with a bad boss.

~~~
megamindbrian2
I'm glad the poster, posted their article instead of this knee jerk reaction.
My manager is a good person. This team deserves good workers. This company
deserves more support than knee-jerk reactions such as "If your manager is
more inexperienced than you, QUIT!" This is why our grandparents think we have
no company loyalty.

~~~
y4mi
"company loyalty" ... in programming? are you serious?

I hope for your sake that you aren't. If you are, you probably are already
getting screwed and just don't know it yet. And it'll probably end with
another disillusionment because the company sure as hell won't be loyal to you
once the CEO can increase his exit-bonus by firing you.

~~~
tomerv
Not all programming jobs are the same, and not all software companies have the
same culture. There are a lot of jobs outside the startup bubble, and outside
the US.

Europe has a much better workplace culture in general , and there is some
loyalty between the worker and the workplace.

~~~
VonGallifrey
I would say that Company Loyalty is a dangerous thing. The Company isn't going
to be Loyal to you. I happen to like my workplace, but I know that if the
company is ever in trouble again they will fire me without hesitation. I
survived 2 firing rounds already. I will not survive a 3rd one. I didn't quit
till now because I was loyal, but I stayed because I was lucky.

Some have decided to quit just before the firing rounds, because we all could
see it coming. That is "disloyal", but they are now employed again. That may
have been the better decision for them.

All of this was in a European Company.

------
mxuribe
This reminds me that networking and engagement are not only activities for
gaining new business...but fostering a support group of people that you
already know. Nice article indeed!

------
Aardwolf
> "I’ve been coached through changing my name, which is a gendered
> professional experience that none of my male peers had dealt with."

How about ending that convention in countries that have it? In Belgium most
people do not change their name upon marrying, and I do not see the point of
doing so. Person X and Y marry, there's a contract already, no name change is
needed for that.

~~~
chrisseaton
Do any countries actually require it? I think in the US, UK and probably other
western countries you choose to change your name and either the man or woman
can change if they want - it’s totally optional either way isn’t it?

~~~
Aardwolf
Not sure, but I'm baffled why people choose to do so. If you've published
anything, for example, don't you want to keep your name attached to it?

~~~
Kihashi
A lot of professional women (in the US, at least) run into that problem-- They
either don't change their name and deal with the social problems that entails
or they change their legal name but still publish under their previous name
and deal with the professional implications. Publishing under a new name is
also an option, but, as you said, makes it much harder to get your work
connected to you.

~~~
eh78ssxv2f
> and deal with the social problems that entails

Can somebody explain a bit on what social problems can women expect in US for
not changing names?

~~~
organsnyder
The main social problem comes when you have kids: if partners have different
names, the kids will have names that don't match one of the partners, or will
need a hyphenated-combination of the two.

The ramifications of this will depend on how common it is for women to not
change their names in your particular locale: if it's uncommon, there will be
some confusion when people expect children and parents' names to match, as
well as people wondering about whether the child is actually your stepchild,
etc. Of course, those judgmental/insensitive reactions are inappropriate, but
they do happen.

~~~
Aardwolf
Kids name not matching is a much smaller deal than _changing_ your name.

Because it doesn't affect anything in practice what their name versus parents
name is, a name is an identifier of a person.

Changing a name on the other hand gives practical problems such as for any
copyrights, email address, source code, publications, etc...

~~~
kelnos
> _Kids name not matching is a much smaller deal than changing your name._

That's easy to say, but that's just your personal feelings on the matter. My
sister left her name alone when she got married, but changed her mind (and her
name) when she got pregnant, specifically because she wanted her kid to have
the same last name as her.

I would probably make the opposite decision if I were in her shoes, but it was
_her_ decision, based on her desires and what makes her the most happy; not
mine, and not yours.

> _Because it doesn 't affect anything in practice what their name versus
> parents name is_

Depending on where you live, there can be social confusion and even a stigma.
Maybe you're lucky in that where you live that isn't a problem, but that's not
the case everywhere.

> _Changing a name on the other hand gives practical problems such as for any
> copyrights, email address, source code, publications, etc..._

No one's saying there aren't practical problems, but if the name change is
worth it to you, then by definition you have accepted that trade off as also
being worth it.

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walshemj
Err you deal with a sensitive hr/ir issue like firing by talking too a random
informal group or peers - this is screamingly unprofessional.

You should have proper training for this issue or at least consulted with hr
or an employment lawyer.

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sk5t
A bit of a digression, and maybe this is a west vs. east coast thing--I
couldn't detect the author's location--but starting an email to one's manager
with "Hey $name" seems disrespectful. Additionally, asking folks "please don't
address me with 'Hey'" I imagine to be ticklish business.

~~~
fnbr
How would you address your manager?

~~~
sk5t
Always "Hi $name" or "Hello $name". "Hey" feels to me like a California-ism
and just a touch too informal for email in particular. Whether the downvotes
on my original comment support or reject this hypothesis, I cannot say.

~~~
pertymcpert
I think it probably rejects your hypothesis.

I use it frequently with multiple managers and directors. It entirely depends
on your relationship with the person. Sometimes you can cultivate a
relationship where being so formal and subservient is unnecessary, if not
counter productive.

Edit: Not in California, or the US.

