
When Too Cute Is Too Much, the Brain Can Get Aggressive - daegloe
https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2018/12/31/679832549/when-too-cute-is-too-much-the-brain-can-get-aggressive
======
sometime
Perhaps it's simply play drive, much like this:
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6olQ-
GGfCJE](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6olQ-GGfCJE) ("corgimorphization")

Cuteness makes us want to hug, tease and whirl around the little being
(basically an adaptation for the offspring to be encouraged to test social
boundaries, individual limitations, and explore how the world works), but if
it's too small or fragile for that or just a picture on a screen, then one
gets a little angry for not being allowed to do so (like seeing delicious food
and not being allowed to eat it). At the same time one is primed for playful
action (biting, pinching, squeezing), so anger already is nearby in the space
of emotions. This might also be aggravated between different species as the
reactions might not match the expectations.

------
pmoleri
I buy the "overwhelmed by positive emotion" explanation. As a parent I've seen
this in my daughters, specially in the first years. They would hugh you
strongly and in ocassions even bite. I've always understood this as some
emotional overflow with no harm intended. Which makes sense, since managing
emotions is not easy for toddlers.

~~~
padpnut
In Indonesia there is a word for this aggression (Gregetan). Is there a word
for this type of aggression in english?

~~~
scoggs
I don't know if this official or publicly traded knowledge but I believe it's,
"Put that toddler on Adderall / Ritalin!"

~~~
samstave
This is acurate. Sadly so.

I have had three daughters who exhibit what was stated above about super hugs,
clenching teeth with saying "i just looove you soooo much" and shaking....

I was aware of this as a positive thing forever. And its lovely as encouraging
them to be emotionally engaged with the world is important part of existing.

I threatened to disown my parents when they were deciding to put my younger
brother on ritalin when he was a child because they were being told he was
hyper, adhd, etc. i told them they needed to stand up to bullshit medicating
of him just because teachers said whatever... (no need to go into details, but
the schools and teachers in the late 80s were victims of pharma snake oil
bullshit, which is why i havent taken even as much as an aspirin or advil in
20 years)...

Children need to thrive, engage, be encouraged to explore all aspects of life,
but we have architected our entire society to supress the natural human
condition.

But ironically, as a cyberpunk nerd of the 80s i somehow thought that smart
drugs and neurotropic enhancement agents were going to be the future hotness.
Where is my damn eye implant?

~~~
EGreg
EspeciLly in school where ADHD is overdiagnosed when the real problem is an
environment with hardly any physical play and mostly sitting quietly for 7-8
hours.

I had a debate with someone where I argued that adderall and others are
basically methamphetamines, one atom away from cocaine. Am I right?

~~~
samatman
Cocaine is a substantially different molecule, but yes, Adderal is
amphetamine, and methamphetamine is effectively just an extra carbon atom
(along with the extra hydrogens that go with it).

Arguably meth would be the better treatment...

~~~
AceyMan
> arguably meth would be the better treatment

It's available but pricey and not available in a variety of dosages.

See, desoxyn

------
derefr
I feel like nobody is offering the obvious evolutionary explanation: you
certainly don’t gain anything by wanting to kill/eat human babies, but it’s a
completely rational impulse to want to kill/eat baby squirrels or rabbits or
deer or any other thing a human hunter-gatherer might run into. “Cute” in this
case means “defenseless”, which means “a free meal.”

~~~
Semiapies
"Obvious evolutionary explanations" by laymen tend to be just-so stories.

~~~
ethanwillis
This comment adds nothing to the discussion. Instead please explain why you
think it's not a potentially valid explanation instead of just attacking the
OP for being a laymen(something you didn't verify).

~~~
Semiapies
I invite you to apply critical thinking as to why someone's declaration of the
_OMG obvious_ evolutionary explanation for a still dimly-understood
psychological phenomenon is fundamentally dubious. Tossed-off evo-psych ideas
like that are the _playground_ of laymen geeks when it comes to biology. They
contribute nothing except a false sense of understanding.

------
amitamb
Relevant Key and Peele skit:
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z6iC0Vi1yEg](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z6iC0Vi1yEg)

------
jelliclesfarm
This isn’t unlike..”these are tears of joy. I am SO happy that I am shedding
tears”. Same phenomenon.

The one about ‘tears of joy’ is something I chased down the rabbit hole. It
has to do with lachrimal glands which are basically our tear ducts. Turns out
each ‘type’ of tears has an unique signature. And it’s prettt distinct and
recognizable under a microscope.

They are connected to fight/flight impulse ..our adrenals..cortisol levels or
stress situation. One can cry from relief post-stress or from sadness or from
joy. Or from pain after stubbing a toe or cutting oneself. And they are all
different.

More here: [https://www.smithsonianmag.com/science-nature/the-
microscopi...](https://www.smithsonianmag.com/science-nature/the-microscopic-
structures-of-dried-human-tears-180947766/)

So..I want to say that this expression of seeming violence after seeing
something cute can be traced back to the same pathways.

------
Kaveren
I'm curious as to how gender and testosterone levels correlate with this. It
appears that this dichotomy isn't limited to aggression, but to more emotions
[0].

This article looks informative about the topic [1]. It poses the question of
how disorders such as conduct disorder might affect this. That'd be a really
good question to answer.

[0]
[https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/095679761456104...](https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0956797614561044)

[1]
[https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fnbeh.2018.0030...](https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fnbeh.2018.00300/full)

~~~
Jach
Apparently in the underlying paper they did a chi-squared test on gender and
didn't see a significant difference (so also didn't report the raw data), this
was surprising since I've only really seen something like this aggression
affect in women and everyone's anecdotes seem to be of women. (Or maybe I'm
just overly separating the desire to "tightly hug" and "squeeze until they
burst".) Would be interesting to get a sample of male anime fans and their
reactions to cute anime girls and see if the distribution is normal.

------
nate
Reminded of Agnes from Despicable Me when I read this:
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1SI6rhotAkE](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1SI6rhotAkE)

~~~
microtherion
I was reminded of Lonesome Lenny: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WZi-
Ilcr47Q](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WZi-Ilcr47Q)

------
bjlorenzen
I'm pretty sure this is just a subset of Intrusive Thoughts
([https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intrusive_thought](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intrusive_thought))
which affect all people equally.

~~~
rayalez
I've heard that when people are afraid of heights, when they come close to the
edge of a bridge or a building they feel irresistsble desire to jump. I wonder
if these two are related.

~~~
anigbrowl
Conjecture, but I believe this is due to disordered preference for orienting
oneself perpendicular to converging lines. Imagine yourself standing on a long
straight road. Now imagine yourself looking over the side of a building, which
is equivalent to looking along a similarly flat surface but from a much
reduced height, as if you were lying on the road and trying to look at it over
the tops of your feet.

A maladaptive orientation instinct might be caused by overcompensation for
astigmatism or other distortion, or a strong preference for one kind of visual
cue (converging parallels) over another (the more abstract knowledge of
gravity and the associated impacts.

There is some evidence to suggest that premature babies are more likely to be
subject to such disorders.
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Visual_cliff](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Visual_cliff)

~~~
jacoblambda
The problem is that l'appel du vide does not just apply to jumping off a
cliff. It tends to pop up in situations where somebody could take a very
simple yet extremely dangerous or guaranteed life-ending action. The other
common case of l'appel du vide is the thought of just letting the car swerve
into a tree or pole.

~~~
anigbrowl
I know, but I don't think that is the only factor in play. You could have
vertigo without ever having the inclination to step in front of a train.

------
ScottBurson
Couldn't help thinking of _Bambi meets Godzilla_ :
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-wUdetAAlY](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-wUdetAAlY)

~~~
dang
Wow, there's a good Youtube comment in that thread:

 _I remember meeting Mr. Newland in BC back in 2007 where he explained that
this was made in the last minutes for his final project in animation school.
He ran out of time helping his fellow classmates with their projects and had
nothing to make. That 's why this has no colour. It had to be 1 minute 30
seconds long so he lengthened the movie with text and nail movement. Thinking
nothing of it, he passed his class, and this was submitted and won an
animation award._

------
MrTonyD
You know, I've noticed that I sometimes laugh when I hear about horrible news.
I've never understood why - since there is nothing funny or laughable about
those bad things. I wonder if this is related?

~~~
freedomben
My wife does this too. It's a horrible source of embarrassment because it
evokes laughter at highly inappropriate times (such as the delivery of
terrible news, such as death of a loved one).

My daughter also does it. When she's in big trouble and mom and I are very
mad, she will often laugh at our anger, despite knowing that it will escalate
the situation. It took us a little while to realize what was happening, and
that she wasn't trying to be a punk.

~~~
sekh60
I do that too, really upsets my wife when I just can't help but laugh when I
have angered her. I have taken to apologizing while laughing and saying that I
acknowledge my response is inappropriate, but I can't help it. Helps
sometimes.

------
neil1023
I feel as if this is just a trend in the way people communicate. It's common
in the U.S. to describe cute animals and babies this way. It might've stemmed
from pop culture (i.e. movies, TV shows).

------
c3534l
I remember there was a commedian who said "you ever see a kitten so cute, you
just want to strangle it death?" or something to that effect. The audience
seemed to relate.

~~~
Bokanovsky
I think it was Sarah Millican who said that. Her sketch is here (NSFW due to
language) - [https://www.facebook.com/BritishComedy/videos/sarah-
millican...](https://www.facebook.com/BritishComedy/videos/sarah-millican-
loving-pets-too-much-contains-strong-language/1938862052997757/)

~~~
c3534l
It wasn't. I think it was Bill Burr or Louis C.K. Some sort of short, fat,
bald comedian, I guess. I get them all mixed up. And it could have been a
kitten instead of a baby. But I remember it because, yes, I have felt a bit
like Lenny from Mice and Men and wanted to cuddle a cute thing too violently.

------
programmertote
I have cute aggression. I learned about that in [https://priceonomics.com/why-
do-we-smother-cute-things/](https://priceonomics.com/why-do-we-smother-cute-
things/) which was published in 2014. So why does this article say Yale
researchers first describe it in 2015?

~~~
xvedejas
The article says they first presented in 2013.

------
ckmox
we call this "gigil" in the philippines
[http://www.bbc.com/culture/story/20170714-an-
untranslatable-...](http://www.bbc.com/culture/story/20170714-an-
untranslatable-word-for-pure-joy)

------
sickcodebruh
There’s a similar effect mostly experienced by women: they want to eat babies.
Not really — there’s no danger — but the idea pops into the head. My wife had
our daughter seven weeks ago and noticed it, we’ve had friends say things from
the common, “I want to eat you up” to an outright faux aggressive “I WANT TO
EAT HER” from one of her friends. Some articles claim it has something to do
with the way they smell. [https://www.csmonitor.com/Science/2013/0923/Why-do-
people-wa...](https://www.csmonitor.com/Science/2013/0923/Why-do-people-want-
to-eat-babies-Scientists-explain)

------
lazzlazzlazz
This is normal behavior among my family. I've always been like this. I also
know many people like this. Very odd to hear people needing to vouch that it's
real.

~~~
irq
It's best not to take your own experiences with acceptance about literally any
matter whatsoever and use it as a lens to fathom what it's like for other
people.

~~~
jplayer01
The problem is that plenty of people flat out don't believe a behavior exists
when it clearly does, just because they themselves don't experience it or
behave that way. It happens so incredibly often - like people who think it's
normal to have to sneeze when they go out under the sun and others who then
need incontrovertible proof that this happens. I'm not sure what to call it. A
lack of empathy or imagination? Lack of respect for different experiential
points of view?

~~~
justtopost
Most people are suprisingly callous to anything that doesn't directly affect
them. While some is inavoidable, much is just taught as 'common-sense
selfishness'. Common in china, and becoming common in the usa. 'CYA', Look out
for #1, Pay yourself first, are all good advice but also self-serving to a
fault. We here on HN are certainly only rarely exceptions to this. We just
hyperfocus on our domain and wonder how 'everyone else' can't see whats
obvious to us.

------
jchw
I frequently remark on how cuteness is treated differently in different
cultures, and I really wonder if it plays a role in how cute aggression
affects people.

------
known
That's the difference between
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oxytocin](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oxytocin)
and
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dopamine](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dopamine)

------
jearfdsa
Anecdata - the thing is real.

I consider myself to be a well adjusted person, but I have a confession to
make.

Whenever I find myself i a toy store in a 'too cute' section, I feel tension
to grow inside me. I have a compulsion to arrange toys in sexual-situation-
resembling poses, stage simulated toy-crashes or break the cute atmosphere in
similar a way.

~~~
JumpCrisscross
> _I have a compulsion to arrange toys in sexual-situation-resembling poses,
> stage simulated toy-crashes or break the cute atmosphere in similar a way_

Why must this be a compulsion? If you had something else to do at the time,
would you be unable to do it without first re-arranging the toys? If not, it
strikes me as normal self-amusement/play more than anything else.

~~~
wallace_f
I mean isn't it kind of normal? I've wandered across many a random sand-
penises sculpted on the beach, and come across campsites having crude stickmen
with oversize penises. And of course, everyone has heard countless sexualized
jokes in their life.

I think the OP has some confirmation bias going on. Taking the conclusion and
using it to narrate his/her behavior. Unless OP _only_ does that as a response
to cuteness stimuli, but the crass behavior seems normally present in people
without cute stimuli.

~~~
anigbrowl
"I feel tension to grow inside me" suggests the impulse cause OP discomfort or
anxiety until resolved, and OP seems fully aware that the juxtaposition of
sexuality or mortality with cute children's toys is considered inappropriate
because of the potential to create distress for children who encounter it.

OP, if this is an unpleasant compulsion rather than an occasional whim you
might want to dig into it with a therapist, either in search of a cause or a
coping strategy as you prefer.

~~~
wallace_f
Yea you are right, come to think of it, the most important thing here is, as
you said, if this is specific to children's toys OP really should seek
professional help.

------
chaval7
I bet future machine consciousness learning will result on machines thinking
we’re so cute they’ll destroy us

------
malvosenior
I think this can be a learned response as a self defense against the constant
barrage of “cuteness” we encounter through marketing. When you see it as
manipulative it’s easy to see why you might get angry.

I know I have the same reaction to all of the lullaby music in commercials.

~~~
DisruptiveDave
Article isn't about getting angry. And it's not necessarily about volume of
cuteness, but rather intensity of a singular moment of cuteness. When my wife
hugs our cat and he's being all cat cute like, she'll remark how she wants to
squeeze the life out of him because she just can't stand how cute he is. I
feel like that's rather common, and has no tie to anger or actual physical
aggression.

~~~
malvosenior
The article is about over stimulation of the emotion and reward systems of the
brain and how negative thoughts can help neutralize that over stimulation. I'm
suggesting that same pattern may be represented by a self learned behavior
that's adapted to being overexposed to cuteness.

------
kazinator
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pxvzEfI0BFU](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pxvzEfI0BFU)

------
reactor
hah, this is so true, I've never given much thought as to why its happening,
but I have got a newborn about a month old, he's very cute that when he with
me and wife is not around, I try to bite or squeeze him :)

------
dalmu1
Aggretsuko

------
trophycase
I said something similar to a girlfriend once. She didn't take it too well...

------
raducu
I don't like kittens because I feel like they are too qute and I feel like
strangling them -- I thought I was insane, phew, glad I'm not.

------
vertline3
I've never had that trait, but I suspect it is caused by a resentful feeling
of being treated like an infant.

~~~
olyjohn
Nah it's not like that at all.

My girlfriend does this all the time. She sees puppies and shit like that on
Reddit, and always does this like "growl" and says how she wants to "squeeze
the shit out of them." It's not like she really wants to squeeze them and kill
them, and it's not actually anger.

It's just a really intense feeling of joy and wanting to take care of them and
play with them. If there's any true aggression there, I feel like it's a
result of being protective. It's probably a very biological reaction to seeing
a small cute creature or person who needs care.

~~~
AnIdiotOnTheNet
It seems likely to me that it's an expression of L'appel du Vide, or The Call
of the Void. You ever stand at the edge of a tall building or bridge and feel
the urge to jump? It's that feeling. One hypothesis is that our brain does
this as a way of making itself more aware of the risk. It makes sense then
that when we see a small and fragile thing we wish not to damage, it would
trigger this mechanism.

~~~
jm__87
I've never really bought that "Call of the Void" explanation. You can imagine
fairly easily what will happen if you jump from a tall building without having
the urge to do it. I've always viewed it as a legitimate momentary urge, just
one that conflicts with almost every other urge we have to live, so we don't
do it and don't even acknowledge the urge as legitimate (most of us, anyway).

~~~
jplayer01
"Call of the void" isn't an explanation. It's just a definition and a label
for an observed behavior/thought. There's nothing to buy.

~~~
jm__87
Perhaps some poor grammar on my part. I was responding to the post with a
hypothesis as to why some people experience the "call of the void": to make us
more aware of the danger of doing an action that would kill us. My opinion is,
this makes no sense. You can imagine what would happen quite easily without
having the urge to do it. This is the "call of the void" explanation which I
do not buy.

------
RandomInteger4
Is that like when I hear a British person speak and I just want to smother
them in hugs and squeeze their cheeks saying "YOU'RE SO ADORABLE!"?

EDIT: Joking about self control aside, I don't think I'll stop smiling for a
long while afterwards if I ever visit England.

~~~
scarygliders
The times when I've visited the USA, folks there commented how much they loved
my Scottish accent.

~~~
bostonpete
...are you Scottish?

~~~
scarygliders
Yes

------
shambolicfroli
FYI to readers: The article gets unnecessarily graphic about violence against
animals.

~~~
smbullet
How are first hand accounts of a psychological phenomenon in an article
describing said psychological phenomenon unnecessary?

