

Can You Keep Your Integrity? - giis
http://www.artofmanliness.com/2013/08/05/what-strengthens-and-weakens-our-integrity-part-i-why-small-choices-count/

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spodek
My interest is not just knowing _if_ I can keep my integrity, but _how_ to
keep it. What beliefs and behaviors motivate integrity?

For me, I remember a simple realization. Once I was alone in an elevator,
tired. I slouched, a behavior I don't like. For some reason it dawned on me
that slouching when no one could see me mattered as much as any in public.

I extrapolated from this otherwise trivial observation to everything and the
words " _It matters even when no one can see_ " entered my daily thoughts and
beliefs, guiding decisions and behavior. Though the observation sounds
trivial, one, it works and two, that's what integrity means: even little
things count.

(Not that it's a big deal, but I wrote it up this summer --
[http://joshuaspodek.com/belief-promote-integrity-
authenticit...](http://joshuaspodek.com/belief-promote-integrity-
authenticity))

~~~
tetha
Basically, it boils down to discipline. Discipline allows you to do whatever
you want. If you think "This sounds silly, I live in a free world, I can do
what I want", think again: All of us had a day during which we went "Meh, I
can't do sports/write in my book/practice/work on my toy project, it's way too
warm/cold/early/late". That's an instance where you can't do what you want,
because you lack discipline.

Once you acquire a strong discipline, you just need to go the right path even
in the small things and you are very, very integer.

It won't be easy, because if you are integer, you will just go your path and
collide with stuff and it will hurt and discomfort everyone involved. But then
again, that's the point of discipline: You can do what you want, even if it's
hard.

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lwinkler
A really nice article. I always wonder about the psychology of dishonest
people and I really like the explanation about the brain filling the gap for
the cheating person.

In a related question I always though that there was a complex relation
between the feeling of honesty and a dishonest behavior.

Example 1: Crook says: "Well of course buy my product." ("I know that it is a
lie but you will buy it because you are a sucker")

Example 2: Crook says: "Well of course buy my product." ("Ok. It might not be
the best product on the market but I am an honest man doing a hard job and I
have kids to feed")

I am sure that you see a lot more of the 2nd type of crook in our world.

EDIT: The idea is of course that very few people lie deliberately and most of
us do it with some kind of justification. Honest people might lie because they
may think that they deserve more.

~~~
arsenerei
You might have interest in watching Ladri di biciclette. It's a fantastic
movie that explores this issue of what it means to steal.

~~~
giis
Yes, Its also known as "Bicycle Thieves" I loved it :D

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digitalsushi
Every example in the article can be presented as: "Do I value what I think of
me more than what others think of me?"

~~~
ds9
Only if you happen to agree with this guy's value judgments.

He counts ad blocking and "pirating movies" as unethical! The former assumes
some nonexistent contract obligating people to do whatever a website asks, and
the latter amounts to "whatever Congress decided to put in current law is your
ethical obligation". Lots of principled people disagree on each of those.

Then he goes on to treat his value judgments as if they were statements of
objective facts, and examines the mentality supposedly involved in
rationalizing conduct he assumes is unethical - leaving a gap in his
reasoning, at best. You can't reduce ethics to psychology.

It would have been more interesting if he'd taken on bigger issues. For
example, "(How) can I make an honest living if all my job prospects involve
exploitive practices? Is there a third way between being an antisocial hermit
and a capitalistic sociopath?"

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soup10
I find it's a lot easier and effective to have integrity if you have a
practical moral code that aligns with human nature/emotions instead of
platonic societal ideals of integrity. For instance, not cheating is a big one
that I have disagreement with. We are naturally inclined as humans not to be
monogamous, so to feel guilty for wanting to cheat or even going through with
the act is self-defeating.

More important are questions like the "why" of cheating than the "what". Is
the relationship dysfunctional? Is it just a fling? etc etc. And are my or my
partners life actually negatively affected by it?

Do you have less integrity if you cheat? Maybe. But I think integrity is the
art of balancing societal expectations, platonic ideals, and actual human
nature/instincts. Adhering to a strict moral code doesn't make you a good
person. If anything it makes you bitter, narcissistic, and resentful of other
people.

Contributing to society on the whole is what counts.

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ds9
The name/theme of the site really put me off. It suggests an audience of men
who are so insecure they feel they have to live up to some imaginary ideal of
"manliness". Isn't being a good person more suitable, with maybe some minor
variations in particulars based on one's sex.

This also makes the article rather misplaced, by implication. Isn't integrity
equally a virtue for women as well? Placing this whole concept under the
banner of "manliness" indicates a rather warped perspective, IMHO.

~~~
mhurron
They have articles on shaving too, does this imply that women don't shave? I
bet they have articles on automotive repair, it must mean they don't think the
broads can handle it.

Gender should not have to be sanitized from everything for it to be
acceptable. It's simple existence does not actually imply anything.

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xmpir
unfortunately integrity and business success are often negatively correlated
(asserted without proof...)

~~~
sailfast
While I agree that there may be some short term gains to be made without
integrity, there are a number of examples of successful companies that work
very hard to maintain it that have seen great success, whether it is the
customer service ethic at an Amazon or Zappos, or the need for the late Mr.
Jobs to make sure even the unseen components were of the highest quality.
Companies with integrity tend to build more stable platforms for success,
though there are plenty of profit opportunities for those without integrity.
(asserted with merely anecdotal proof...)

~~~
lgieron
What you're describing is not integrity (or perhaps integrity limited to
business-customer interactions only). The more challenging part of integrity
is how you treat your business partners, workers (paying peanuts to workers
who manufacture the iStuff while sitting on billions), if you dodge taxes etc.
That's the money part as well - being greedy and heartless vastly increases
your chance of making it big.

