
How to Write a Condolence Letter - pepys
https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2019/01/21/how-to-write-a-condolence-letter
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andyjohnson0
> “I’m not opposed to preprinted cards,” Cunningham said.

I think it's worth avoiding pre-printed cards. If you know the bereaved or the
dead person well enough to want to express your condolences, then write a
letter or note. It doesn't have to be more than a few sentences, unless you
want to write more. Yes its a hard thing to do, but it's also necessary. And
in my experience it can help the writer too.

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kieckerjan
Second that. What counts is a personal gesture. A plain white card will do.
Write it by hand and put an envelope around it. Don't worry about the text too
much. Make it short and respectful. And don't try to be too original, which
might come across as intrusive.

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bradenb
I like the advice to not overthink it or try to write a perfect letter. I have
this same problem, especially when it comes to condolence cards. I recently
signed one with several coworkers for another coworker and I tried so hard to
write something profound that I ended up writing something that I felt was
really awkward to read. I should have just said what I felt: "I'm so very
sorry for your loss."

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dano
Sometimes it is enough to tell people that you're here for them, to simply be
present and acknowledge their loss. It is difficult to write such letters when
you've not experienced loss yourself, and then when you have, you know how a
good letter reads. The best are simple, hand-written notes that contain a
brief sometimes funny story about the person you lost. Lastly, you make
friends and lose friends during these periods as some expect you to get over
your grief and others just hang in there with you.

