

Ten Tips Guaranteed to Improve Your Startup Success - mikeleeorg
http://dashes.com/anil/
Oops, direct URL is http://dashes.com/anil/2013/03/ten-tips-guaranteed-to-improve-your-startup-success.html
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wololo
> 3\. Grow up with a family that is as steady and secure as possible.

"I was having lunch with a friend who is a retired venture capitalist and we
drifted into a discussion of the startups she funded. We agreed that all her
founding CEOs seemed to have the same set of personality traits – tenacious,
passionate, relentless, resilient, agile, and comfortable operating in chaos.
I said, “well for me you’d have to add coming from a dysfunctional family.”
Her response was surprising, “Steve, almost all my CEO’s came from very tough
childhoods. It was one of the characteristics I specifically looked for. It’s
why all of you operated so well in the unpredictable environment that all
startups face.”

I couldn’t figure out if I was more perturbed about how casual the comment was
or how insightful it was." --[http://steveblank.com/2009/05/18/founders-and-
dysfunctional-...](http://steveblank.com/2009/05/18/founders-and-
dysfunctional-families/)

~~~
anildash
There's no doubt that many high achievers have some sorts of dysfunction as
motivators; I always point to the paternal failings of the fathers of (say)
Bill Clinton or Michael Jackson. But even granting that pattern, you'll
generally find a stable presence within people's broader family, and examples
from Bill Gates to Mark Zuckerberg show a much more common pattern of
extremely supportive parents providing a strong foundation for success. I
would love to see research about the families of a cohort of YCombinator
participants, for example.

~~~
wololo
"My hypothesis is that most children are emotionally damaged by this
upbringing. But a small percentage, whose brain chemistry and wiring is set
for resilience ..."

This relentlessness, stress immunity, etc. -- these are "positive"
characteristics of primary psychopathy. And it is associated with having a
rough childhood. Maybe that's what he's referring to? On the other hand, it's
such a small fraction of the population, maybe it's irrelevant?

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mikeleeorg
Oops, direct URL is [http://dashes.com/anil/2013/03/ten-tips-guaranteed-to-
improv...](http://dashes.com/anil/2013/03/ten-tips-guaranteed-to-improve-your-
startup-success.html)

------
mindcrime
That was about as useful as all the people putting #firstworldproblem hashtags
on their tweets, which is to say, "not at all".

Look, if those of us who happened to be born as white males in the United
States are supposed to apologize for that, then ya know what...

No, never mind, not going to try and incite a big flame war over this.

There are millions (if not billions) of people in the world, living in
horrible conditions, and that's a terrible tragedy. But there are better ways
to point that out, and raise attention for causes like clean water,
sanitation, etc., than mocking those of us who happened to be born American
born WASPs, and who want to improve our own lot in life and maybe, just maybe,
make the world a better place for everybody in the process.

~~~
anildash
A useful exercise may be to examine why you thought I was mocking you, even
though nothing like that appears in the piece. Similarly, your defensiveness
in thinking I asked for, or wanted, some kind of apology isn't supported
anywhere in the article.

Really think about where those responses come from, because I think that could
be one of the best lessons you take away from the article, since your heart is
in the right place on the issues I was trying to raise. I suspect part if what
impacted your perceptions here is that this article was not solely, or even
primarily, directed at you. Thanks for reading!

~~~
mindcrime
I am, of course, over-generalizing. I don't see it as mocking _me_
specifically... but honestly, this piece read very similarly to a class of
articles / commentaries / whatever, that one commonly sees in the wild, that
seem obsessed with asking white, male Americans (and related groups) to engage
in pure self-deprecation, attribute everything good in their lives to
"privilege" or luck, and feel no pride in their accomplishments.

Maybe it hits close to home for me, because while I _was_ born in the US, as a
male, in a marginally stable family (my parents didn't divorce until I was
16), I feel like I've overcome a tremendous amount of adversity nonetheless,
and when people - who I expect are largely more prosperous, more affluent,
etc. than I am - come out and start talking like I should be apologetic for my
circumstances, I chafe at that a bit.

White? Yeah... "white trash". America? Yeah... North Carolina: _rural_ North
Carolina... _very_ rural North Carolina. Family? Yeah... my dad dropped out of
school in 8th grade, never really learned to read, worked back-breaking manual
labor jobs his whole life, the majority of which kept him away from home for
months at a time. I barely knew my dad as a kid, and we went through more than
one period of being on food-stamps/welfare/etc. while he as between jobs... my
mom had some mental health issues and threatened to kill herself not
infrequently, and may have tried once. Etc., etc., etc.

Now, no matter how hard my childhood was, I _know_ there are people who have
it worse, even _much_ worse, especially in 3rd world countries. And I am
sympathetic and I do want to help make the world - as a whole - a better
place, for them as well. But damnit, any insinuation that I had some sort of
easy path to success by virtue of being white, male and American just rubs me
the wrong way.

Like I said... "we all have our own cross to bear".

Oh, and I tend to take things too personally sometimes. :-)

