

Goodnight Nanny-Cam - ericedwardthor
http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/shouts/2012/11/goodnight-nanny-cam.html

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ericedwardthor
I found one of the comments on the poem very interesting as well. Complicates
the humor and the take away from the piece. Children and childrearing has
evolved dramatically. Overall I think it has been for the better, though it is
always worthwhile to reflect upon our actions and priorities.

"Most of the adults I have encountered seem to suffer from an inability to
resolve two conflicting impulses: the desire to make a better life for their
children and their children’s children (and, often, for all the members of
those generations); and a certain sort of frustration arising from the fact
that people won’t just do what was done before because what was so wrong with
that? It’s easy to say that people have been surviving for millions of years
without this or that modern innovation, and it’s easy to mock parents who
stress about all the new threats science uncovers for us each day, but ease
doesn’t imply insight. The problem the above essay highlights isn’t with
innovation or striving to improve our children’s lives but rather with
obsessing to excess about things that don’t warrant obsession. That’s simple
to say but it gets obscured by the humor aimed at the stereotypical alpha
parents. If newborn babies can’t discern colors outside the gray scale, why
not get a high-contrast black-and-white moon if it will help your child learn
to see and understand shapes? Or if Baby Mozart might help stimulate your
child’s brain (or even if it’s just pleasant for your child to listen to),
then why not shell out a couple bucks for a CD (or even less for a
downloadable MP3)? And I wouldn’t have minded so much if my parents had bought
some French flashcards, given how easily children pick up the structure and
content of language (I can read the brief bit of French in Nessel and Ratner’s
ditty, but the 5+ years I spent in French classes in middle school, high
school and college could have been a little easier if I had been given a head
start). What compelled me to write this comment, though, are the subset of
things that alpha and (thankfully) many non-alpha parents do that are
unequivocally important but that are overlooked because people are too busy
laughing and not wanting to look foolish.

To start: who wouldn’t use a fireplace safety gate with a small child in the
house? Or even just with people in the house? (And who the heck put a
fireplace in that child’s room in the first place? [Just kidding]). The
sterilizer is not necessary if you’re willing to boil your bottle for the
requisite twenty minutes or so. And that’s all well and good except that many
people don’t know that you need to boil things for an extended period to
actually disinfect them; if they’re boiled for only five or ten minutes, then
you may as well save time and not do anything. And is it really so egregious a
transgression to buy organic food, given that babies are considerably more
vulnerable to pesticide residue? On a related note, why would you use baby
wipes with perfume? The non-scented ones cost the same and don’t irritate skin
or risk allergic reaction. Though the danger from scented wipes is minimal,
another substance mentioned here carries far more risk: phthalate, which is, I
will admit, obscure-sounding and little-discussed. But even so, it is harmful
and (no surprise) very cheap for companies to use, companies that are more
than happy to continue to listen to people mock those who worry about the
effects of these substances that are bad enough for full-grown humans, to say
nothing of newborn babies. I have never heard of non-slip socks; I don’t see a
problem with brain-development games; nor do I think that a digital archive is
inherently less valuable than a physical archive; I don’t know the various
doctors mentioned nor what a baby would use a yoga mat for nor do I know what
sleep or G & T coaches are; I might be misinterpreting but I think I had a
star chart and I’m pretty sure I thought it was cool. As a pasty white person,
I can’t imagine not using sunscreen for my child; and sunhats have been making
babies look adorable and ridiculous for at least the last two generations (and
who doesn’t love a baby in sunglasses?); my au pair was from Denmark but she
was still cool and sweet and she and I still stay in touch (thanks to the
evils of modern technology); I don’t live in a place that requires a HEPA
filter but if I did I wouldn’t hesitate to get one for my son or daughter (and
I wouldn’t moan later in their lives about how my parents didn’t buy one for
me). I’m aware that this comment is largely humorless and curmudgeonly, but I
think humor like the above has an insidious effect made all the more powerful
by the ease with which we all join in the mockery."

