

EJ: How I Feel today - palebluedot
http://ejroundtheworld.blogspot.com/2011/08/how-i-feel-today.html

======
mc32
Here's how I feel about the events:

ABNB reacted overly cautiously to the detriment of their customers and also
themselves. They were utterly unprepared and made many missteps and outright
blunders --naive, really.

EJ described the harrowing experience. There was sympathy, and there was some
disbelief, as well (unfortunately, there appeared to have been some strong-
arming too).

ABNB, eventually, after much public outrage and prodding, finally, after
severe fall-out, came correct. There was reticence, it appears.

EJ is now pinning the reaction to her statements, at least tangentially, on
ABNB. She had me till that. And still has me on board for the stuff before
that. However, one cannot publish something, at large, i.e. broadcast it, and
think everyone is going to be sympathetic to you. It's naive. The only people
one can fault are the respondents.

I'm not saying she brought that onto herself. No. However, it's just part of
the deal. It's like buying meat at the butcher's and not expecting it means
there's a cow somewhere that will get slaughtered. It's part and parcel.

The reaction to her posting has nothing to do with ABNB, directly. It cannot
be pinned on the ABNB donkey. The reaction comes across as appealing to
emotion. I think that horse has been beaten.

~~~
scott_s
Consider that EJ is like most people who write anything online, including you
and I on this site. We may know that everything we say is, in theory, open to
the whole world, but in practice, no one cares. I think she wrote her blog
post in that mindset. It's similar to a mindset that, say, you have when
writing a comment on HN. Now consider what would happen when seemingly the
entirety of the internet is analyzing what you said.

It's easy to say she should have known that her blog is a broadcast medium,
but really, it's not most of the time. Most of the time, very few people
probably read it. Most forum posts and blog entries get lost amid the noise. I
think it's unrealistic to assume that everyone who writes things on the
internet that normally gets lost among the noise should be emotionally
prepared to be temporarily _not_ lost among the noise.

~~~
mc32
I'm sympathetic. It's a very reasonable and persuasive argument.
Unfortunately, it's one of those things one cannot control -short of
censorship.

The same thing happens with people's email transcripts. The same happens with
politicians and open mics. Most of the time ill-conceved/or personal emails or
rants or candid opinions to an open mic are not picked up and broadcast
--sometimes, depending on context, opportunity and misfortune, they are -to
lots of regret, embarrassment and perhaps, lawful correction. Occasionally,
opportunity.

Basically, to me, they seem inextricable. I cannot/am not able to see a way to
separate them in an unmoderated open forum.

My main point wasn't that she should have realized it's a broadcast medium.
Rather, realize the medium is subject, by its public nature, to a spectrum of
reactions. Some of those can be reactionary and unwelcome. It's part of
discourse.

------
stevenp
I'd be curious to know whether the Airbnb guys were honest with pg about what
was really going on, since pg commented a few days ago on HN: "I've talked to
the Airbnb guys and they are already doing everything they could be doing to
help this woman."

The tone of some of the comments made by public people (like pg) seemed to
imply that EJ was lying, without saying it directly. Assuming that Airbnb's
mea culpa about being "paralyzed" is true, I think EJ deserves an apology from
some of these people that have characterized her as being less than honest,
based on their friendships/personal connections with the Airbnb team.

I like Airbnb (I'm staying in one of their rentals right now!) and I hope that
in the end this whole situation makes them more successful.

~~~
pbreit
Everyone bends a little in their own direction but I didn't see anything
worthy of the "liar" designation.

------
throwaway_away
Am I the only one that feels EJ is being a bit dramatic about the situation?

I made this throwaway in case I am really just crass and insensitive... but
time and time again I see examples of what I call the new "American Dream" -
which is to sue someone or some organisation for hurt, pain, and suffering.

Airbnb fucked up. I see that. EJ had a really shitty experience, and I would
not want meth addicts to ransack my house and steal my identity.

But what would make her happy? What does Airbnb need to do now?

I have a feeling it involves millions of dollars... because millions of
dollars in compensation seems to be the cure for this kind of emotional
damage.

~~~
scott_s
I think it's unfair to blame her for a lawsuit you have made-up.

As for being dramatic, people who are coping with PTSD probably look "a bit
dramatic" to the outside world.

~~~
kyro
You don't know if she's coping with PTSD. You and a few others have been
throwing that around. Learn your psychology and psychiatry first before you
start making your diagnoses.

~~~
scott_s
You're right, I don't know because she has not been diagnosed, nor am I a
psychiatrist. But considering her descriptions of what the past several weeks
have been like, and the words she has used to describe the events, it sounds
to me more likely than not.

My point with bringing this up is before thinking that she is overreacting,
consider that she _might_ be suffering from PTSD.

------
btucker
Here are my take-aways from this whole fiasco:

1) If you're in a business where your customers' lives could be seriously
impacted 24/7, you must be reachable 24/7.

2) When something goes horribly wrong and far outside any predetermined
policy, follow in the footsteps of Derek Sivers, Tony Hsieh, Gary Vaynerchuk,
and the thousands of business owners that have come before them and just do
right by the customer. Don't worry about setting precedent, don't worry about
losing money (within reason), just do whatever you can to show that you truly
care. Make sure all your employees know this & give them the freedom to make
decisions on their own to help the customer.

3) Don't create a situation where you're "clarifying" what your customer has
said publicly and calling into question their feelings.

4) When you screw up (and you will), own up to it in a public way as quickly
as possible. Make a big deal about it. Your future customers will appreciate
the candor and seeing your commitment to getting things right.

------
OpenAmazing
_I hope you will come back here in search of answers to the many questions
that loom large._

That's an interesting thing to say, especially after recounting the emotional
impact the internet trolls have had on her.

It seems she may be struggling with how best to react to her new internet
fame.

------
pseudonym
Hopefully this will be an endcap to the public side of this, at least. Here's
hoping she can get what reimbursement she's entitled to and get back to her
life.

------
daimyoyo
This will become a textbook example of how(and how not) to handle disasters in
the Web 2.0 world. As an aside, I'm glad AirBnB is finally doing the right
thing.

------
juliano_q
Well, she obviously had a trauma and have to recover now, and it will take
some time. I hope that they catch the criminals, EJ recovers well and Airbnb
learn with their mistakes.

That said, I think we can move on from this history. It is a sad history, but
much worst and much better stuff happends every day. It will be the best for
us and for her if we just move on.

------
startupcomment
It was inevitable that something of this nature was bound to occur eventually.
The folks at AirBNB should have had better policies and procedures in place to
help to avert and react to such situations.

------
Cushman
_Ouch._ They mishandled this badly. I think it's clear by now that EJ could
have become an extraordinary spokeswoman for the Airbnb Guarantee; instead,
all they get is a single "gratified".

------
Mafana0
I hate to be that guy, but...

Why should we have every single blog post by EJ on top stories here on HN? Why
is "how she feels today" so important and still relevant? She caused all the
drama and blamed Airbnb for something she is more responsible about than
Airbnb. Airbnb did the right thing after all, some think that it's late, I
don't. I'm just pissed about the attention that we give to her words. I won't
be surprised if she authors a book to talk about how _"Airbnb should have
responded much more quickly to my urgent pleas for help, that they should have
communicated with more sensitivity, and that they should have taken decisive
action to help me feel safe during what has been a desperate time."_. Come on,
stop blaming them, they didn't make your _"integrity being called into
question"_ , and your _"character publicly trashed"_. You did.

~~~
pbreit
I'd say you are "that" guy. This is indisputably an interesting story even if
it wasn't YC's crown jewel (or, one of). This is what many bloggers do...they
write about their experiences. Unlike some or even many, EJ was not writing to
build HN karma. I think what she has written is plausibly reasonable. It would
be easy to nit pick with some of the details.

~~~
Mafana0
Even if she's blogging about her experience, her feelings aren't relevant
anymore, interesting story or not, we shouldn't care anymore, you can easily
subscribe to her blog and read her words.

I would never call her names, but it's obvious that she's enjoying all the
fame and attention she's getting. God knows when she will stop complaining and
thanking AirBnB and admit that they made it up for her generously, even though
they were never obligated to.

Some argue that what they did was only out of PR pressure. IMHO, that doesn't
make them bad guys, working for your company reputation isn't a bad thing to
do.

EJ (and others) are still saying that AirBnB should have responded more
quickly, for anyone who knows even the slightest bit about businesses and
entrepreneurship, it's certain that this sort of insurance policy can't be
done in hours, that needs days maybe weeks and they done it well. Does anyone
think they should have shared their working details with her because she's
writing post after post to complain about them so they don't sound like they
don't care? Some do and that is very naïve actually.

If you're implying that what I said was for karma, you can check my
submissions/comments history, I'm more of a lurker here, I don't comment that
much and I definitely don't care about karma (less than a dozen comments in 2
years).

Thank you Dysiode, you've nicely clarify my point.

~~~
pbreit
> she's enjoying all the fame and attention

My sense is the complete opposite.

> If you're implying that what I said was for karma

I was not.

I'm not sure you're interpreting things well on this topic.

------
shawnee_
ESFP

