
The most American thing there is: eating alone - e15ctr0n
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonkblog/wp/2015/08/18/eating-alone-is-a-fact-of-modern-american-life/
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cylinder
I was just discussing how American culture is, on its surface, highly
extroverted yet actually quite introverted. We value an extroverted
personality, but then people generally go home to isolated suburban homes, eat
alone quietly while watching TV, watch more TV then go to bed. Families can be
extremely individualistic, meaning people hardly spend time with extended
families.

When I was in southern Europe recently I couldn't help but notice how people
would sit in restaurants or cafes and talk for hours. Honestly I have no idea
how they can converse for so long and what they talk about.

Of course as I understand it the further north you go the more introverted and
achievement-oriented the culture becomes, like America.

I don't mind it but of course I'm biased, I'm American and somewhat
introverted. I like that I can be introverted and eat alone or watch a movie
alone and nobody cares and when I feel like it I can be extroverted and chat
up strangers or have some good office banter.

~~~
PhasmaFelis
> _When I was in southern Europe recently I couldn 't help but notice how
> people would sit in restaurants or cafes and talk for hours. Honestly I have
> no idea how they can converse for so long and what they talk about._

As an American, this baffles and saddens me. Have you never had a close friend
that you can just gab with for hours about shared interests, current events,
and so on?

~~~
dingaling
That might be possible on an occasional basis, but less so on a daily basis in
a family situation.

My wife and I have a limit of one Work-Day Story each at the dinner table,
because any more than that becomes boring for the other person. She really has
no interest in the programmatic internals of insurance systems.

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robbyking
I am an extremely social person, but nearly every weekday I eat lunch alone.

My main motivation is it's literally the only time during the week when I
_can_ be alone, so I take advantage of that time. Most days I go for a 45
minute walk and listen to a podcast, then grab a sandwich or a salad and eat
it back at my desk while browsing the web.

It really makes a huge difference in my day.

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simonsarris
I'm an American crazy about food (and dining, alone or with others), and I
found this one out the hard way.

Back in March I was growing crazy from New Hampshire's winter so I bought a
ticket to Portugal. I learned the words for "thank you" and "sorry" and some
menu-critical vocab and hopped on a plane to find a bit of sun, do some street
photography, and try the food.

It was a big unintended consequence of having no one to go with. Dining alone
at night simply _isn 't done_ there. At all. Only one restaurant I found had a
bar counter, and it was a lunch place. There was no "eating at the bar" like
I'd do anywhere in the US.

Every night I was the only person in each restaurant dining alone (for a week,
no exceptions). In a city I found this really surprising. This makes it harder
to meet people (no bar counter where you can talk to a bartender and other
diners), which I think is too bad for solo travelers. It was a little
alienating, I definitely felt like the oddball each night.

At Terra (fantastic veg-only place in Lisbon) one couple near me did say _Bon
Appetit,_ seemingly out of pity that I had nobody else with me, which seemed
nice of them.

The solo-dining culture must be a plus of traveling within the US, I'd think
for some. At least I've met/talked to interesting people at a bar counter
before in different places, even in my hometown.

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dubeye
Love eating alone, me. In the UK I always feel a bit weird, but I love sitting
on the bar of a American brunch place, drinking limitless coffee till i'm
buzzed out of my tree, and eating on the counter. Also the US coffee shops are
full of people working alone, reading, doing their thing. In Europe, people
cling to each other like monkeys at dinner time, and I feel like a real freak,
and bat away pitying glances for fun, so I much prefer the US way.

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tantalor
This trend validates the appeal of Soylent, whose users views eating as a
waste of time, rather than a social experience.

~~~
PhasmaFelis
The Soylent founder that everyone thinks is crazy eats Soylent exclusively _at
home_. He also talks about how much he enjoys eating out.

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plonh
I recall a past article about Americans have a strong irrational aversion to
eating alone. Generalizations are fun

~~~
FungalRaincloud
Well, it's definitely a generalization, but I would say it's right for some
Americans. I'll eat alone without hesitation, but many of my friends will not,
and have a strong aversion to it. I think there's a point to be made that it
isn't so much that we don't feel anxious about eating alone, but that no one
in our shared culture thinks it's unusual to see an adult eating alone. By
shared culture, I mean to acknowledge that there are several regional culture
groups that could be described as distinct in the USA, and by unusual, I mean
to say that it wouldn't be viewed as there being something off about the
person. But I do think that the case can't be made that we, as a culture,
enjoy eating alone.

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davidw
That's a big difference between work here and over in Italy - there, most
everyone went out to eat together every day. I miss that a bit (although I'm
really happy to be back in the US for other things).

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clessg
As a Canadian, I wonder if Canada is more like America or Europe in this
regard. I suppose that it'll be an experiment the next time I go out to eat
alone.

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datamatt
The Author clearly hasn't travelled much. In Japan, many restaurants are
geared entirely towards solo diners and drinkers.

