

Ask HN: Critique my landing page - ssijak

Hi guys, I would like to get a honest critique of the http:&#x2F;&#x2F;buzzloud.com&#x2F; landing page. Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks!
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ColinWright
Being brutally honest ...

Instant reaction - it looks like a gazillion other sites.

Second reaction - too many words to start with - I'm not instantly engaged.

    
    
      > Social sharing done right
    

I don't know what that means, and I find it hard to care.

    
    
      > We are solving your problem of managing different
      > social media presence and reach.  Let us cut out
      > your wasted time, allowing you to spend more time
      > creating cool stuff and engaging with followers.
    

You're not telling me what you are actually doing. How about:

    
    
        Save time!  We ...
    

Well, at this point I don't actually know what you actually do.

Reading further ...

    
    
      > Manage your posts and schedules and let us
      > do the rest while you do other important
      > things for your business. 
    

Is this primarily what you do? How about:

    
    
        Write when you like, let us handle
        scheduling for maximum effect.
    
        Track the effects!  We can help you
        see the results.
    

Or something.

It's completely unclear that one should click on "Enter your e-mail". It's not
even completely obvious that "Register" is a button. Then when I cluck on it,
then I get errors, because I hadn't entered my email in the place I should've
cluck first, but which wasn't obviously a place to click.

If you see what I mean.

I'll stop now.

~~~
ssijak
Thanks for the reply! I implemented some of the suggested changes. As for the
input and button, I thought it was obvious that the green bar is the input
field, I added some java script that focuses field with blinking cursor if you
click register without entering email.

~~~
ColinWright
Problem there is that click register and some text disappears and leaves me
with a blinking cursor. If I don't remember what was there before, then I
don't know what to do.

Better might be to open another field, clearly marked with "enter your email
here for your free trial!" or something. As it stands, it's still not clear
what to do - you're taking a lot for granted. When you design something you
then assume various things are obvious - that's unavoidable.

And I still don't really understand what you do.

------
tejbirwason
Nice overall layout. The only thing I would change is the email address text
box. I could not find where to fill in my email until I clicked around and
discovered that the email address name tag itself is the input box. Maybe
append a blinking cursor to it so users know where to input the address.

~~~
gdewilde
Same, I didn't see the form at first.

~~~
ssijak
Were you on mobile or desktop browser? On my android phone submit button just
goes into another row below input, maybe some other phone renders it
differently. Maybe I need to change the form completely on phones.

~~~
gdewilde
on the desktop

------
ZenPro
I won't give a subjective view, just concrete points.

1\. The CTA is to enter an email but then the user is invited to click a
register button. Which is it?

I would recommend simply having an input box (not a button). You knock one up
for free with Mailchimp and embed it.

EDIT : Just seen that a box exists to enter a text string but it a) Serves no
purpose and b) has nothing to identify it such as a cursor or colour

2\. Free Trial/Reach More People is H6.

This needs to be H1 or H2 at the least and ideally boxed with text/colour
differentiation.

3\. Light grey copy text is not ideal.

Increase the weight/darkness of the text to increase legibility

4\. Main value prop is long-winded

The text underneath Social Sharing should be bullet-pointed and immediately
clear. I read to the fold and it was still no clear exactly what you offer. Do
you manage accounts? Do you provide content? Engage with users on my behalf?

5\. Slogan is poorly written

"Be above others". << Are you telling me that right now I am below others? As
an encapsulation I don't love it - it is opaque and appears poorly written.

Edit: Just thought of "Elevate your Engagement". Just an example of a slogan
using alliteration and a clear prop.

6\. Sharing is inverted

You have a grossly disproportionate size of sharing buttons compared to the
impact statement. Boxes are tiny but the statement is massive.

I hope this helps. Typed for brevity so please excuse if it sounds harsh.

~~~
ssijak
Hey thanks for the time! For the first point, is it not clear that you first
have to enter email and then click register button? (btw, it is currently
connected to the mailchimp, I just did not used their form builder) 2.Tried
different H levels but H1-H2 seemed too big for the layout, maybe layout or
placing is the problem. 3.Yap, that was mine concern too, looked good to me
but seems like dark text would look more legible. 4.Will think about making it
one clear sentence. 5.Mabe will remove it after thinking about 4. 6.This was
intentional, did not want to be rude with sharing buttons, but wanted to get
the message across.

~~~
ZenPro
Those sharing boxes are classic unbounce. Is UB your platform?

~~~
ssijak
What is UB?

~~~
ZenPro
Unbounce. Sorry, I had typed Unbounce a few words before I used UB; I thought
it was clear.

~~~
ssijak
No, I made it myself with bootstrap and some theme that I customised a little.
Hosted it on digital ocean and implemented one A/B test with Google Analytics
Experiments. (1 variant is without that "Made with love for sharing" line).
Domain and mail address is at namecheap. Love to have more control over my
stuff.

