
The day I left my son in the car - klunger
http://www.salon.com/2014/06/03/the_day_i_left_my_son_in_the_car/
======
encoderer
I once left my puppy beagle in the back of my car, windows cracked, while I
ran into the restaurant to pick up takeout.

I was not in there more than 5 mins. When I got out, started to pull away, and
was stopped by a cop who then called animal services.

This level of nanny-state-ism drives me slightly crazy. But the real issue for
me was the person who decided s/he needed to call the police (the _police_ for
this). If it were me, I would probably sit and wait on a bench nearby, keeping
an eye out. It's true that the dog was barking like crazy but he's a dog (a
beagle at that), and dogs bark. I'd watch and if he showed signs of distress,
I'd act. Or, if it turned into 20, 30 mins, then probably I would also react.
But the person who comes across a situation and instantly goes to "call the
police" is not something I understand.

I think maybe we all know the type who just likes to report things. Who likes
that power trip. I can't help but feel we'd maybe be better off if those types
learned to be more circumspect in their actions.

(In the end i paid my $35 fee and told the cop and animal control that I
thought what they were doing was a total farce.)

~~~
drzaiusapelord
To be fair, if I'm a passerby and I see a dog with the window cracked open, I
have no idea how long he's been there. Calling the cops makes sense, they're
the ones paid to made the judgement call and animal control should have the
training to diagnose whether the dog is in distress or not. Whoever made the
call chose to err on the side of caution out of humanitarian concern, not to
get your goat or ruin your day.

Sounds like your police department sucks more so than the worried passerby
engaging in "nanny-statism." The police chose not to assess the situation
correctly and just went for the easy fine.

~~~
IanDrake
>I have no idea how long he's been there. Calling the cops makes sense...

So, everyone is assumed to have no common sense, only you have it and thus
become the default enforcer despite, admitting, not knowing the situation?

~~~
mcv
There are people who do terrible things to animals. When you see someone
taking good care of an animal, there's no reason to suspect he's one of the
few people who do terrible things, but when you see an animal in a situation
that looks like it could be something terrible, the situation is a lot
different.

If you see a lone dog tied to a tree in the forest, it could be that the owner
is taking a leak somewhere, but it's also possible the dog was abandoned.
Better safe than sorry is not a terrible principle.

Same thing with kids in locked cars. Kids do die in locked cars. Not very
often, but it happens. When you see a kid in a locked car, it's good to make
sure the kid is okay.

I'd rather see false alarms treated seriously than see serious situations
ignored. And reducing the number of false alarms by not leaving kids in cars
also helps people identify the serious situations.

------
mcphilip
While it's tough to criticize the decision to leave a child in the car for a
few minutes -- happened to me all the time as a child -- I'm forever scarred
by seeing a dead child pulled out of a car in the office complex next to mine
[1]. The dad was bashing his head against a tree trying to knock himself
unconscious because he was so overcome with grief. Officers were trying to
restrain him when his wife showed up and went completely (understandably)
histerical, pounded her fist on the ground and screaming at her husband.

I can't fathom how one could begin to process and move on from such an
incident.

So while I don't think it should be illegal to leave a child in the car,
personally that's a line I'll not cross with my kids.

[1][http://www.khou.com/news/Baby-left-in-hot-truck-dies-in-
Aust...](http://www.khou.com/news/Baby-left-in-hot-truck-dies-in-
Austin-122663114.html)

~~~
jbellis
The very big difference is that child-bakes-in-the-car heat deaths are not
because Dad left the kids in the car while he ran in to the store for a few
minutes, but because Dad forgot the kid was in the car at all.

[http://www.parenting.com/article/tragedy-in-the-backseat-
hot...](http://www.parenting.com/article/tragedy-in-the-backseat-hot-car-
deaths?cid=plusblog)

~~~
DanBC
Parent runs into store for few minutes, trips and knocks head becoming
unconcious / has stroke / has heart attack / etc etc - child dies.

Having said that, This story is a really good example of how tough it is for
some parents and how hostile society is to parenting.

~~~
baddox
If the father became unconscious, had a stroke or a heart attack, etc. while
driving or doing anything with the child away from other people, the child
could die.

~~~
anigbrowl
Yes, but people would know the child was there. If someone fall down
unconscious in the middle of the supermarket nobody knows which car they
arrived in, or even for sure that they arrived in a car, and nobody knows
about the unattended child. That's a different kind of risk.

On the other hand, for the person in the parking lot to film the child in the
car and call police, but not make any contact with the child or wait by the
car, borders on malice. Police and prosecutors should investigate but heavily
discount such pseudo-testimony because it is deliberately presented without
context.

~~~
DanBC
Approaching a young child who has been left alone in a car is foolish in
today's paranoic society.

Also, the returning parent is unlikely to be grateful to the comments of "I
was just making sure your left alone child was not dying".

~~~
anigbrowl
The person was near enough to spot the child and take a photograph, so they
could have remained at that distance and call the police if they feel it's
necessary, not least to advise the returning parent/guardian that the police
were called. In that case the police would probably have arrived and written a
ticket or something. Although this would have involved a delay and frustration
for the temporarily unattentive parent, it would have been better than the
actual outcome involving the issuance of arrest warrants.

One could say 'why not let the matter drop, the Mom came back and so
everything was OK' but that's a classic example of hindsight bias. From the
police POV, a child was left alone in a vehicle that was later driven off by
someone else. When they followed up, it turned out that the person who drove
off was not the owner of the vehicle (which belonged to the child's
grandparents). They have to at least consider the possibility of malfeasance.

~~~
DanBC
Your firs para: could you imagine the situation where you tell a parent that
you called the police because you were worried about their child? That's not
an easy conversation.

I agree that people should report early and report often; and allow experts to
make decisions. Sadly, reporting early and often just swamps people who are
already far too busy dealing with children who are being abused, or it dumps
reports with police who take action when they don't need to do anything more
than have a chat.

~~~
anigbrowl
I agree it's not an easy conversation, but if you think it's important enough
to take photographs and call the police about it was important enough to
communicate to the person who you have made a potential suspect. In this case
it would probably have resulted in a much less traumatic outcome for the
author of the story, who at worst might have missed her plane.

------
petercooper
_he had agreed not to pursue the charge if, over the course of nine months, I
completed 100 hours of community service and attended parenting education_

Superbly written, but the underlying story and outcome disturbs me. That
someone is dissuaded from presenting a fair case because a court is considered
to be bad at its job and taking a revenge-not-justice punishment is the best
option serves as a serious indictment of 'justice' in whatever loony tunes
jurisdiction she lives. Judicial systems are _meant_ to apply laws
contextually based on actual facts, not condemn anyone who falls into a gray
area.

~~~
angersock
_Judicial systems are meant to apply laws contextually based on actual facts,
not condemn anyone who falls into a gray area._

But that's _hard_ , and maybe _unfair_ , and it barely scales.

EDIT:

Somewhat more productively, one wonders if this is a side effect of there
being simply so many ways to get pulled into court--parking citation, drug
possession, etc. I could understand if we took a more bureaucratic approach
simply to keep up with the "demand".

------
noonespecial
It wasn't so long ago that the "bystander" would simply watch the child for a
minute out of common courtesy for the mother. If it looked like it was getting
out of hand, then perhaps intervention of some sort might cross their mind.

We've become a nation of "I'm Teelllllling..." suitable for nobody but a
playground full of 5 year olds.

In my opinion, the actions of this "good samaritan" were not motivated from
concern or helpfulness. Just like on the playground this action was malicious.
A subtle kind of violence.

~~~
drblast
Right! If the intention were to protect the child, and the child were in
actual danger, the bystander would be right there next to the car in case
anything went wrong.

If anything, the bystander should be prosecuted for the same crime.

~~~
Gravityloss
But, if you did something, you'd then be prosecuted for some other crime.

Soon you're probably being arrested for breathing from the wrong nostril.

~~~
noonespecial
Soon it will just factor out to "you can be arrested at any time". The reason
will be unimportant, or rather, will revert to the mean of "didn't like
something about you".

------
nostromo
I'm willing to bet that having a pool in your yard is much more dangerous for
your child than leaving them in a car with windows cracked for 5 minutes.

Media drives government. Clicks drive the media. What we're left with is a
hodgepodge of laws that attempt to prevent yesterday's headline.

~~~
Pxtl
iirc, drowning is the #2 preventable cause of death in kids, after car
accidents.

~~~
Fuzzwah
As a 1st time Dad of a 4 month old I figured I should find this list.

This pdf has it broken down into age groups:

[http://www.cdc.gov/injury/wisqars/pdf/10LCID_Unintentional_D...](http://www.cdc.gov/injury/wisqars/pdf/10LCID_Unintentional_Deaths_2010-a.pdf)

This site was helpful and included an interesting little side bar:

[http://www.cdc.gov/safechild/NAP/overviews/](http://www.cdc.gov/safechild/NAP/overviews/)

\- Motor vehicle crashes are the leading cause of injury death overall, and
especially for teens. \- For infants, suffocation is the biggest risk of
injury death. \- Drowning is the leading cause of injury death for children
age 1-4.

------
mikestew
The U. S. has long been a country of busy-bodies (the Puritans weren't known
for keeping their noses out of the business of others), and the example of
this story demonstrates that cellphone cameras make it easier to share your
nosiness without that uncomfortable confrontation of the past.

Before you go off to pull out those "child cooks in car in Texas in July"
anecdotes, consider that motor vehicle crashes are the leading cause of death
for children. So if we're collectively _that_ worried about it, let's get up
in arms about needlessly taking the child on a car trip before we worry about
applying "justice" to someone who left their child in a car in 50F weather.

If it were truly a case of "good samaritan" I'd blow it off. But I'm going to
guess it was more a case of "she's doing something I think is awful.
Regardless of whether harm was done or not, I'm going to go tattle!"

------
nkurz
I'd be interested in hearing non-US perspectives on this. Is it acceptable
elsewhere to leave your small child alone in the car for 5 minutes while you
get something from a store? Would you fear for the child's safety, of legal
action, or neither? Is the US leading the way criminalizing parents who do
such things, or are there other countries that have been doing this for years?

~~~
Fizzadar
When I got to the bit about being arrested I was completely baffled... there's
a law against this? I'm from the UK and as a child was left in the car for
short periods, which is almost certainly commonplace.

I'm simply stunned that parents can be prosecuted for this. Another wtf
America moment.

~~~
mcherm
Actually, as the article explained there is NOT a law against leaving your
kids in the car. Such a law was proposed and the legislature refused to pass
it.

Instead, the prosecutor decided to charge her with "contributing to the
delinquency of a minor" which is a broad catch-all category for doing things
that might harm a child. She was not found guilty of this crime either.
Instead, her lawyer advised her to agree to punishment for the crime because
if it went to trial there was a CHANCE that she would lose custody of her
children.

The problem here is not in the law nor in the outcome of a court case. The
problem lies in the structure of the legal system. Prosecutors wield enormous
power by virtue of their ability to decide whom to charge and for what. The
penalties for losing are so great that nearly all (around 95%) cases are
settled rather than contested before a judge or jury.

------
ryandrake
I don't now if it's an American thing or maybe a Western thing, but for
whatever reason, voters and elected officials seem to be able to effortlessly
make that huge leap from "It's sensible to do ABC" and "It should be required
by law to do ABC, under penalty of fines and/or jail". We over-legislate
things like public safety, and then rely on the court bureaucracy to apply
sensibility and lenience on a case-by-case basis.

See Also: Three felonies a day

EDIT: Spelling

~~~
kevinnk
How can you say it's a Western thing when places like Singapore have fines for
not flushing the toilet?

~~~
scott_karana
1) Fines aren't criminal offenses

2) I suspect that there are more valid reasons to leave a child in a car,
compared to reasons to not flush.

That said, the consequences are greater in the case of potential child
neglect.

------
lt
Wonder how they would react if they saw swedish babies napping outside in sub-
zero temperatures:

[http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-21537988](http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-21537988)

~~~
lsaferite
I didn't go over well.

[http://www.reuters.com/article/2011/08/15/us-restaurant-
baby...](http://www.reuters.com/article/2011/08/15/us-restaurant-baby-
idUSTRE77E62O20110815)

------
peterwwillis
> I got out of the car one day to feed the parking meter next to the driver
> side window. “Don’t, Mommy. Don’t. The police will come.” I went to let the
> dog into our front yard while he was watching his morning cartoon. “Mommy,
> no!!! The police.”

Sigh..... It's such a tragic, fucked up thing that our society could do this
to a child and his mother. We all really need to think more about the
consequences of our actions. The bystander who called in should have done more
than just call the police. The mother should have brought the kid in. The
cop(s) shouldn't have let it get to court. The courts shouldn't be able to
split apart families for a single, momentary, stupid, virtually riskless act.
And the media needs to not villify and capitalize on the fear and hate of
people who judge situations like this without context.

~~~
aidenn0
To be fair, all we know is that prosecutors can _threaten_ to split families
apart for a single, momentary stupid, virtually riskless act. The mother
agreed to a plea-bargain because she didn't want to find out if they actually
could.

------
imgabe
This is just so patently absurd. The legal issue seems to revolve around
"rendering the child in need of services". A child alone in a car for 5
minutes on a mild day is not in need of services. The case should be thrown
out right there.

~~~
anigbrowl
Well police investigations aren't free to the taxpayer.

~~~
harimau
She didn't mention it, but nothing is really 'free' about this. With court
costs, lawyers, time spent doing community service, and other miscellaneous
stuff I wonder how much it cost her total. Not to mention a year or so of
stress worrying about it and the obvious lingering effects of the decision.

A large portion of people most likely would not have been able to round up the
resources she did nor have the support and get screwed by this type of stuff.

It's good that she's bringing the subject to light but, being a seemingly
local law, and one that you might not know about until it's being thrown at
you, it seems more likely it will continue to harm parents just getting by.

------
rsync
As a sanity check, here is the law in California (which, I assume, is
relatively restrictive, since it's California...):

It is illegal to leave a 6 years old or younger unattended in a motor vehicle
when:

There are conditions that present a significant risk to the child's health or
safety. Example: Leaving a child in a closed car on a very hot day.

The vehicle's engine is running, the keys are in the ignition, or both.
Children can start or move the car causing injuries and/or deaths to
themselves or others. An opportunist may (and many have) seize the moment to
jump in and drive your car away, child still strapped in.[1]

So ... as long as there's nothing unsafe and the engine isn't running, you're
"legal".

[1] [http://www.dmv.org/ca-california/safety-laws.php](http://www.dmv.org/ca-
california/safety-laws.php)

~~~
darklajid
Well, the article states that it wasn't illegal wherever that took place
either. Somehow 'not illegal' is considered 'a grey area' though.. Which makes
it even scarier. Excerpt for the people that just see your comment below (I =
mother, He = lawyer):

“I don’t get it,” I said to the lawyer. “Contributing to the delinquency of a
minor? That makes no sense. It sounds like I was buying him beer.”

He laughed. He told me he understood my confusion about the charge, but that
it wasn’t that unusual. A few years before, the state had tried to pass an
ordinance that would make it a misdemeanor to leave a child under 6 alone in a
vehicle if the conditions within the vehicle or in the immediate vicinity of
the vehicle presented a risk to the health or safety of the child. The penalty
for a first offense would be a $100 civil penalty, in other words, a ticket.
But the legislation didn’t pass, and so instead, the act of leaving a kid in a
car would continue to fall into a legal gray area. The lawyer explained that
the crime of contributing to the delinquency of a minor included “rendering a
minor in need of services.” So, for example, he said, “If you’d left him there
and not come back, someone from social services would have needed to come,
bring him in, make sure he was safe and such.”

~~~
grecy
> _Well, the article states that it wasn 't illegal wherever that took place
> either. Somehow 'not illegal' is considered 'a grey area' though_

It's my observation that anything that is "not illegal" in the US now means
"We'll find a creative way to stop you doing it".

------
shasta
> It was a temporary lapse in judgment.

Leaving your child in a car for five minutes is definitely a lapse in
judgment. Not because it's dangerous so much as because your peers are stupid.
I remember a time where I was really tempted to leave my kid in the car. He
was asleep. It was a nice cool day. I was going to be gone for much less than
five minutes. I was going to be able to see the car the entire time. Nope.
Better safe than sensible.

~~~
SeanDav
Except it is not safe to remove your kid from the car - that carries risks of
its own. There is no safe option - as the article clearly points out.

In any case - if you wanted to make the safe decision, why did you put your
kid in the car in the first place? Don't you realize how dangerous it is to
drive on the roads? Ask yourself - which is safer - Your child spending 5
minutes alone in a car with a window cracked open on a cool day - or 5 minutes
driving to that place, with oncoming traffic that with the slightest lapse of
attention by a driver could have their car crashing into yours in a second.

This is the madness of this whole situation - people have left common sense at
the door.

~~~
notdonspaulding
I think you missed the parent commenter's point that the reason they took
their kid with them had nothing to do with the actual risk to their child
(which they determined to be low), but everything to do with the likelihood of
having to deal with other parents in a highly-litigious society (which they
determined to be much higher).

~~~
SeanDav
Agreed - I saw a later comment by the poster which shows I misinterpreted the
comment. My original point still stands though, just not applicable to the
poster.

------
IanDrake
Seriously, this is my number one reason for not having kids.

For the younger crowd who may not understand, I was born in '77:

\- I rode in the back hatch (no seats) of my dad's corvette until I was 8,
cops would wave to us.

\- At 6 I could ride my bike around pretty much anywhere I wanted, but wasn't
allowed to cross rt6 (which I didn't, though no one checked).

\- Left in the car in parking lots for up to an hour.

\- Arrived home from school with no one home starting in 1st grade.

~~~
tptacek
Putting children in the seatless back hatch of a Corvette was probably not a
great parenting call either.

Not everything that used to be S.O.P. for parents was good judgement. Not
every safety concern we've developed over the last 20 years is wrong. Some of
them are very valid.

~~~
mentat
Risk minimization as an overriding strategy is fundamentally flawed as it is
never complete. It also appears that people are really bad at understanding
the costs for very small benefits.

------
claar
I hope the reason that this story is popular is that we as a society agree
it's absurd.

Leaving a child in a locked car in the situation described is perfectly
acceptable. The police getting involved is ridiculous, which makes it a great
story. Hopefully the correct lesson is learned.

------
sadris
Another example of why you should never talk to the cops. When they come to
ask, "Did you or your wife leave your child in the car?" Only acceptable
response is: come back with a warrant.

~~~
steve-howard
They already had evidence of the facts at hand, if not evidence of wrongdoing.

> a bystander had noticed me leaving my son in the car, had recorded the
> incident using a phone’s camera, and had then contacted the police.

~~~
wvenable
Fortunately the car the registered with grandparents -- unfortunately, they
talked.

------
chazandchaz
Is this story fiction?

The last line of the article reads: "Kim Brooks' fiction has appeared in Five
Chapters, Glimmer Train, One Story, Epoch, and other journals. A graduate of
the Iowa Writers' Workshop, she teaches writing and is at work on a novel. You
can follow her on Twitter @KA_Brooks."

~~~
snorrah
I think that's just pointing out her actual occupation, rather than suggesting
the story is fictional.

------
fixermark
I remember when my mom left me in the car to run into the grocery store one
summer. I put the seat back and dozed with my head resting against the
partially-slackened seatbelt. It was a hot day with the sun shining right in
the windshield. It felt nice and sauna-like, so I closed my eyes for a bit...

My mother got pretty upset when she came back and found me in that state. She
told me that's how people manage to die in the car, and when I realized how
hot it was I should have popped the door open and come inside.

And, well, she was right! :)

------
jack-r-abbit
My dad used to drag us around in the snow behind his truck as we laid on an
upside down car hood tethered to the truck with a rope. It was a prefect
3-person toboggan. That was in the 70s. No one cared.

Just this week a woman got media blasted for having her infant pulled down the
church aisle on her wedding dress train. Now I find that a bit tacky as far as
weddings go but I can't imagine that child was in any more danger than I was
while speeding down a dirt road on an overturned hood.

Times have changed.

------
sliverstorm
Good lord, how can this be a crime? Leaving my puppy alone in the car for a
minute or three here or there (under reasonable circumstances of course) has
been a productive part of developing his confidence in himself, his ability to
be alone, and his ability to be calm. I'm not a parent, but I expect basics
like this apply to kids too- how can they grow up to be well-adjusted adults
if they must be supervised at all times?

~~~
interpares
>how can they grow up to be well-adjusted adults if they must be supervised at
all times

Sad answer is they can't. What a society we're building for ourselves.

------
jaimebuelta
All this seems crazy... It seems like we are not able to understand some risks
and gave up directly to irrational fears... In particular anything related to
kids.

I respect people with irrational fears, and understand that sometimes happen.
For example fear or flying.

But we seem to accept that just because someone has that kind of fear is ok to
act like that fear was a real danger. As the article said, driving is,
comparatively, a huge risk compared with things like kid abductions or
terrorist attacks. We seem not to give a dam to drive four hours a day, but be
scared to death if we cross someone on a dark street...

We are simply terrible evaluating risks, and be more fearful each day...

------
awda
30-40 a year, mostly from suffocation sounds almost negligible. It seems fine
if you crack the window and they know how to get out.

~~~
tptacek
With a four year old, the prospect that they might get out of the car is one
of the bigger worries you should have. A four year old walking alone through a
parking lot is incredibly dangerous.

~~~
awda
Probably something I should learn more about if I ever have a four year-old.

------
tptacek
I've flagged down a cop seeing a kid alone in a car, and would do it again.

Should people who leave their toddlers in cars be prosecuted criminally?
That's a complicated question. In almost every reasonable case the answer is
probably "no".

But this article doesn't really grapple with that question. Instead, it's a
stew of rationalization and misdirection. It is literally an argument _for
leaving kids alone in cars_. "I immunize my kids. I know pools are dangerous."
Yeah, and you left a four year old alone in a parked car. You brought it up.
BAD CALL. "This other parent let their nine-year-old ride the subway by
themselves." Well, I think that's a bad call too, but who cares? Nine isn't
four, the subway isn't a parked car.

 _" And then I left him in the car for about five minutes. He didn’t die. He
wasn’t kidnapped or assaulted or forgotten or dragged across state lines by a
carjacker. When I returned to the car, he was still playing his game,
smiling."_

Asshole. The risks to a four year old child left alone in a parked car aren't
that the boogeyman might steal them.

If you want to read a piece that seriously grapples with this issue, read Gene
Weingarten's "Fatal Distraction" from the Washington Post:

[http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-
dyn/content/article/2009/02...](http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-
dyn/content/article/2009/02/27/AR2009022701549.html)

~~~
imgabe
What, exactly, are the risks to a child in a locked car on a cool day for five
minutes?

~~~
tptacek
My thoughts immediately go to "that they will get hit by a car when they
figure out how to get out".

~~~
imgabe
The article states that the car had child locks, which were used, so the doors
could only be opened from the outside. Furthermore, the kid specifically
wanted to go on the trip in the first place so he could sit in the car and
play with the iPad, which he was happily doing.

It's not impossible that in the space of five minutes the kid could get bored
of the iPad, unbuckle the car seat, and figure out how to disable the child
locks from inside the car. It's just very, very unlikely. If that's what had
happened there would be a case for getting the police involved, but it didn't
happen. If we're going start prosecuting people for every crime they could
hypothetically commit at any given point, every single person would be in
jail.

~~~
Domenic_S
I don't agree with tptacek on this (at all), but front doors don't have child
locks and it's trivial for a child to crawl up to the front seat.

~~~
tptacek
You _totally disagree_ that it's unsafe to leave a four year old alone in a
parked car?

~~~
Domenic_S
I don't, but that's not what I, the article, or your OP were really talking
about. What I disagree with is this statement/attitude:

> _I 've flagged down a cop seeing a kid alone in a car, and would do it
> again._

The interesting and proper question isn't whether it's unsafe to leave a four
year old alone in a parked car, it's whether leaving a four year old alone in
a parked car warrants involvement from the State -- particularly, involvement
kicked off by a fellow citizen.

It surprises and deeply concerns me that we live in a country/world of social
content and community-driven projects, yet when one of our (real-life)
community members might possibly be in trouble, a cellphone video and call to
the cops is the default (and lauded) reaction. Look, had that 4-year-old been
in real danger, a cellphone video wasn't going to help him. A call to the cops
wasn't going to help him either (clearly, as they arrived after mom had left).
Ok, maybe a coin flip on the cops at best.

What can the cops do that the nosy neighbor -- or you -- couldn't? Truly, if
someone felt a child's life was in danger, everything else could wait while
you supervised the situation and sent someone else to go fetch mom out of the
store. Or use that cellphone to call the store, or whatever. In other words,
you could _actually do something_. Unless this fictional example kid is
literally dying before your eyes and you think medics/the coroner are going to
have to be involved, what's the point of calling the cops? Two options: either
a) to throw mom under the bus or b) to let yourself think you did all you
could so you can get going to that next meeting.

~~~
tptacek
Oh, you were making a political point. Now I get it.

------
Osiris
I, personally, don't believe that children should ever be left alone in a car,
but I'm not sure where the legal line should be drawn.

On one extreme, it would only be criminal if a child dies under your care,
which would be criminally negligent homicide or something similar.

On the other, we can't run in to drop a movie off at RedBox without getting 3
kids out of the car.

I wish people in positions of authority were able to apply more common sense
and wisdom than always involving the criminal justice system.

My wife knows a lady that does (unlicensed) day care, and she leaves kids in
the car all the time. She just tells them to hide so no one sees them. As far
as I know, none have been injured, but it's also pretty irresponsible and I
wouldn't allow her to watch my child.

~~~
greedo
Unfortunately, people in positions of authority have no incentive to apply
wisdom and common sense. Imagine if they ignore this report, and something bad
happened to the child? They'd be crucified. It's far easier to take the
report, do the minimal amount of investigation required by policy, and then
let a prosecutor apply their discretion as to whether charges are pressed.

The same perverse incentives apply to the prosecutor as well. It's no skin off
his back to charge the mother, and he can always say "it's for the children!"
if queried about it. But should a child die, when both the police and
prosecutor could have done something, is something our society won't allow.

------
bpackard
Imagine what would have happened if she stood firm, and brought little Simon
NoNo into the store. He proceeds to throw a fit, and then [gasp!] she
threatens to, or even does, spank him in the butt. She'd have likely been
arrested and missed the flight home.

------
agorism
As if Child Protective Service has anything to do with protecting children.
Orphans are very profitable. Charging people with crimes is how police,
judges, and prison guards get paid.

~~~
aidenn0
I'm not even sure where to begin responding to this.

1) CPS wasn't ever involved in this case

2) Everywhere I've ever lived CPS was already understaffed and overworked;
they don't have time to go looking for children to take away, they're busy
enough already.

------
krupan
Wow, what a story for a parent to read. Lenore Skenazy and her discussion of
the various risks we take as parents is awesome. Also, read Parenting with
Love and Logic. Makes the argument that over-protecting your kids is denying
them important learning opportunities. Mind blowing at first, but then when
you think about it (and remember your own largely unsupervised childhood) it
makes a lot of sense.

------
balor123
I was leaving daycare a few weeks ago and saw someone do the same. She left
one kid in the car while she went inside to pick up the other one, in Texas.
At least it was in front of a daycare center during pickup time, where people
would likely notice. Still, a number of things can delay you inside or in the
worst case, if you have a freak accident then it could easily be the end of
the kid too.

------
headgasket
At this rate HomeAlone(1,2,3) will soon have to be reclassified as R rated
horror by the MPAA!

------
rudedogg
"What Would You Do?" on ABC had a scenario about this:
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VSveKV8Tk3s](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VSveKV8Tk3s)

------
janitor61
If you had put the kid in the trunk, nobody would of ever called.

------
tdiggity
Is it ok if my car can keep the AC running (engine off) while my kid is in the
car? I'd probably get arrested for the possibility that the car could get too
cold...

------
moron4hire
"He glanced up at me, his eyes alight with what I’d come to recognize as a
sort of pre-tantrum agitation. “No, no, no, no, no! I don’t want to go in,” he
repeated, and turned back to his game."

That's where you failed. Clearly, there was a pattern of negligent parenting.

~~~
scrumper
Are you being serious with that comment? I can't see how it's a joke. I
strongly suspect you'll end up being downvoted into transparency, but in case
not, where is the 'pattern'? Where, in fact, is even another example of
negligence (conceding that some people may consider leaving the child in the
car negligent, which I don't.)

EDIT: Ah, it happened while I was replying, probably for the best.

~~~
notdonspaulding
I understand where you're coming from here, but to parents who actually do
have spines (and seek to grow such spines in their children), it is actually
fairly easy to see that the reason the 4-year-old was left in the car was due
the fact that he was running both the conversation and the decision-making
that occurred throughout the incident.

Which is to say, I can see the GP making the general point that the mom didn't
have a "temporary lapse in judgement" as much as a systemic failure to live up
to her role as the adult in the parent->child relationship.

Just to be clear, I'm not arguing the mother is negligent for either this or
leaving the kid in the car. I'm just saying when you can recognize that your
child will throw a tantrum and your only recourse is to begin making
concessions to them, you're already at a point where _they_ are raising _you_
more than you are raising them.

~~~
aidenn0
A good point. In a parenting class I went to recently, they showed the
standard classical conditioning diagram, and then said roughly: "Now, while we
know that there is more to human behavior than this box represents, it does
describe a lot of it, and remember, that's not just your child, but you as
well."

