
Ask HN: Time to walk away? - confused_cto
Today I have found myself at a crossroads, first a little background.
I have been building a thing for about 18 months on and off. About 3 months ago I decided to partner up with someone and go all in - my partner is based on the other side of the globe, so as part of him coming on board we met and spent some time together - including pitching to VCs. As part of this partnership we bestowed the title of CTO on me and CEO on him. We have worked on perfecting our message etc and can really hit a good pitch, the problem comes from commitment - I am working on &quot;thing&quot; full time and also doing some freelance to pay the bills&#x2F;feed my family. CEO can see this so advised me about 4 weeks ago he was going to quit his day job so that he could focus on &quot;thing&quot;, however since that day there has been one excuse after another for not doing it. I have been responsible for all research, tech poc&#x27;s, pitch deck, basically everything other than meeting and setting up pitches.
A few days ago we got a &quot;no&quot; from a seed VC - we had pitched them in November and had been through full DD and met all the partners, so I think we were kinda hopeful (but thats a post for another time). Now I was not involved in the &quot;no&quot; phone call so I am not certain what was said - however I have been told by CEO guy that &quot;They don&#x27;t like that the R&amp;D will happen in &lt;other country&gt;&quot;. I trust CEO guy but I do suspect he is being given an excuse, I think the real reason is that the VC can see that the CEO guy doesn&#x27;t have any passion for what we are doing - if we have a meeting then nothing happens (like a thank you email)
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tixocloud
There's always a risk with bringing someone onboard to work with you. The fact
is, while many people say that they want to be an entrepreneur and want to be
part of it, the initial passion can fizzle out fairly quickly when things get
tough.

In my case, I've went through a few partners: 2 walked away and 1 have said
that they're interested in learning but the time commitment is tough. Some
people just aren't willing to put in everything that's required without really
knowing that there's something in it for them.

What I've decided to do then is to take the lead and steer the ship until we
hit revenue. My partners all have a full-time job so I can understand that
putting extra hours in for something that may not turn out great is tough.
That being said, I do appreciate their help.

In your case, is your partner willing to take a step back and let you guide
things? It's important for you to be completely transparent and clarify
things. If he's in, how in is he? What can you get from him and what do you
need to give up for his help? Can he help you? Have that talk. Time is of the
essence for a startup and you can't afford to keep things dragging along. Your
family needs you.

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helpfulanon
Bringing in an outsider to handle the "business" part of the business,
especially when bestowed with a title like "CEO" over top of the original solo
founder, is a recipe for a lopsided relationship. And it's somewhat unfair on
your part to expect that another person can suddenly leap in with the same
passionate drive you have for a product you built yourself for over a year.
But honestly the fact that you're in different countries makes it that much
worse.

Regardless, my understanding is that we're entering a dry period for capital
in the tech business right now and investors are pulling back from tech
startups in a big way.

If this is true, VCs are going to raise the bar quite high. A few years ago
just the fact that you are in 2 different countries would be an automatic
disqualification for many investors. And they can clearly see that not only
are you collaborating remotely but you sourced someone and more or less put
them in the driver's seat as your bizdev proxy.

I suppose the outlook was a lot more rosy back in Nov but it's frankly
surprising that they even let you in the door in the first place. The investor
gave you a very clear rational reason for backing out.

Your CEO's passion for your business isn't something you can force either.
They see the risk as well. Unless your product is just mind blowing, which
maybe it is given the interest, you're not going to raise money easily with
this configuration.

You have a high bar in a difficult time, and a limp partner is the last thing
you need. So yes you need to address this head on. Hopefully you can regroup,
bootstrap a little longer and try again when you're on firmer ground

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confused_cto
unless I prompt it, every decision gets evaluated over and over, things that I
could decide on a dime (like going all in, or who to bring on in partnership)
have to take weeks to decide and then revisit over and over. We get direct
feedback from VC's saying "we want to see a plan for x, y and z" and this
somehow turns into us changing three things no one mentioned... Its like he is
unable to make a choice and then turn that choice into action... I suppose
other than venting my real question is this: I have told CEO guy that he has
to decide between "thing" and "day job" or we need to part ways. am I being
precious or is this the right call?

~~~
confused_cto
Should probably mention that when forced his plan was "to initially drop to
80% day job and 20% thing and see how it goes for a few months, and go all in
once funded". I see this as a vote of no confidence and a lack of passion?

~~~
hanniabu
The difference in actions between him being skeptical and having no passion is
very thin to people like us on the outside that aren't experiencing this first
hand. Both case would opt for not fully committing. The answer will be in the
details, such as his wording when talking about certain subjects, his mood and
expressions when brainstorming and discussing different aspects of the
project. Maybe it's a little of both. The point is, it is pretty much
impossible for us to tell whether it's lack of passion or lack of confidence
that's keeping him from taking that leap of faith.

As far as how you should go about handling the situation, I'm afraid I can't
offer too much help as I do not have any experience in this situation.
However, I do not think it's unreasonable for you to be pressuring him to call
your raise and carry his own weight. The best advice I can suggest is to
probably straight up talk to him and explain your concerns. After all, you
guys are founding a company together, so you should be able to have
discussions such as these as if it's your spouse.

Good luck mate

