

20 Things I Wish I Had Known When Starting Out in Life - drm237
http://zenhabits.net/2008/02/20-things-i-wish-i-had-known-when-starting-out-in-life/

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doubleplus
21\. Don't let people walk all over you. Chase down the bastard who took your
car.

It looks like someone already wrote the inspirational post generator I was
working on.

Seriously, though, he says at the end that he wouldn't want to be anywhere
other than where he is today, and that he had to make all the above mistakes
to arrive there. Which is true imho - I feel the same way. He also says his 18
year old self wouldn't listen. That's also true - this certainly isn't the
first time I've seen someone say "don't drink to excess, don't watch too much
TV, stay fit, and watch your personal finances." So his conversation with
18-yo-self would be wasted. I'd like to see a list of things he would say to
an 18 year old that would actually lead to some change in behavior towards
healthier living and a happier life. That would be something I haven't read
yet.

~~~
edw519
"I'd like to see a list of things he would say to an 18 year old that would
actually lead to some change"

OK, I'll start.

"Anyone who's good at anything knows that there's an inverse correlation
between talking about it and being good at it."

(Opps, I almost forgot...)

"Dude."

~~~
hobbs
Speaking well instead of performing well will make you twice as likely to be
hired by the average Megacorp, Inc. Quality provides satisfaction; appearance
provides money.

~~~
edw519
"appearance provides money"

Until it doesn't.

~~~
hobbs
Well, you can't be a total phony. There are weighted values applied to skill
and appearance in corporate HR. My experience has shown that the weighted
value applied to appearance is roughly 2x the value applied to skill.
(Assuming that the typical HR person can even measure skill. Most can't.)

~~~
edw519
I suppose you're right about that at Megacorp. Another reason so many of us
are starting our own.

~~~
hobbs
Just to clarify, I do find your original statement to be absolutely correct:
"Anyone who's good at anything knows that there's an inverse correlation
between talking about it and being good at it." The reason you have to
explicitly say it, though, is that it goes against the grain of human
behavior.

Being the type of person who actually does things without wasting time talking
about it, I've had to learn the hard way that that's not what hiring managers
look for. I would not trade my satisfaction of good work for money, but I've
found that by spending a little more time on marketing skills rather than on
programming skills, I can greatly improve my income.

~~~
edw519
I offered it because, if I remember correctly, that's about the only advice
that would have reached me when I was 18.

------
hobbs
One thing that I hadn't fully realized until I was about 30 or so: Your grades
and test scores only matter to "the first". That is, your high-school grades
and SAT scores only matter to the first college that you enroll in. After
about a year or two in college, if you transfer to a different college, they
don't care a whit what your high-school grades were. They want to know what
your college grades are.

Similarly, your college grades and the name of the college only matters to
your first employer. After that, future employers don't care what your college
GPA was. They want to know what you've accomplished professionally.

This is not to say you can just slack your way through school. What it does
mean, though, is that you shouldn't obsess about your GPA. Channel that
academic energy into some actual achievements - not into ultimately
meaningless points. In the end, accomplishments are worth much more than
grades.

~~~
kinkydarkbird
Good thing that I relised that before I was in college.

~~~
hobbs
I had a gut instinct that this was the case while in school, but then every
authority figure in my life was telling me that I could be the valedictorian
if only I'd "buckle down and study". It took some distance before I was able
to objectively look back and judge who was ultimately right.

Since I've remained good friends with the person who actually became the
valedictorian, I've been able to compare notes over time. It turns out that in
as little as 5 years after graduation, being the valedictorian doesn't mean
squat. Everyone wants to know what you've done lately.

------
wallflower
I've bought tens of self-help/self-discovery books and even read some of them.
Of those I've read, I've found lots of commonalities and themes.

The most important theme, in my mind, which is echoed in successful startups
and businesses is: _You_ _don't_ _have_ _to_ _get_ _it_ _right_ _,_ _you_
_just_ _have_ _to_ _get_ _it_ _going_ _._ _._ _._ " (as Mike Litman puts it)

~~~
Shooter
Which Litman book?

~~~
wallflower
Another Litmanism "The name of the game in life is you either have to focus on
the process or the reward at any given moment. If you focus on the reward...
(procrastination) If you focus on the process, you'll get there"

Litman quotes Bloomberg...

From page 52 (paperback) in his book 'Bloomberg By Bloomberg':

"We made mistakes, of course. Most of them were omissions we didn't think of
when we initially wrote the software. We fixed them by doing it over and over,
again and again. We do the same today. While our competitors are still sucking
their thumbs trying to make the design perfect, we're already on prototype
version No. 5.

By the time our rivals are ready with wires and screws, we are on version No.
10. It gets back to planning versus acting. We act from day one; others plan
how to plan - for months."

The principle is fundamental. I don't think it was a specific book. I'm on his
email list twice - he reiterates the theme a lot.

To elaborate, Litman says it's all about small steps. You need to make a
commitment to taking small steps. All of successful business is a compilation
of small victories. It's the small steps that make a difference. Most people
aren't willing to stay in the game long enough to succeed...

Conversations with Millionaires is a great book because he interviews a really
diverse group of successful entrepreneurs.

Personally, I don't always like his rah-rah cheerleading you-can-do-it
approach but he shares some valuable insights.

~~~
Shooter
Thanks for taking the time to share this info...I didn't even realize he had
anything to do with the Bloomberg book.

Litman's "Conversations with Millionaires" book was pimped out by a bunch of
people I think are pretty shady, so I had avoided reading it. I'll check it
out if I come across it again. Unfortunately, I don't think these types of
books would sell without a generous dash of the rah-rah cheerleading stuff.

~~~
wallflower
No, Litman did not have anything to do with Bloomberg on Bloomberg. He was
quoting Bloomberg (as he). I believe if you can get one idea going forward out
of a book, it's more than worth it.

------
yters
Any comments on the journalling?

~~~
wallflower
I've started doing this again. If you're introspective, it's hard to find
someone to talk to about your life - Writing your thoughts and feelings down
is immensely therapeutic - it's like listening to yourself.

I use a private, password-protected blog (TypePad) and can even use their
mobile interface. I find paper diaries can be hard to use as you have to
establish a habit, while since most of us are always online in some form -
it's easier to journal digitally.

I did do lots of journalling years ago (using a bound paper diary) during a
difficult workaholic phase and it is painful to read the self-pity and
negativeness of the entries. But, it is good to see how I've changed since
then.

