
Every Hug, Every Fuss - Scientists Record Families’ Daily Lives - raju
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/05/23/science/23family.html
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electromagnetic
> _Parents generally were so flexible in dividing up chores and child-care
> responsibilities — “catch as catch can,” one dad described it — that many
> boundaries were left unclear, adding to the stress._

> _The couples who reported the least stress tended to have rigid divisions of
> labor, whether equal or not. “She does the inside work, and I do all the
> outside, and we don’t interfere” with each other, said one husband._

Quite interestingly this was a pattern I've already noticed in my friends and
families' houses. Those with rigid divisions of labour tend to be the most
relaxed, which personally I know I'm most relaxed if I know what I'm doing in
advance. It personally bugs me when I get home from work and I'm told BTW
we're going out now as I usually have things I already planned to do in that
1-2 hours after work.

However, a caveat is that rigid divisions of labour /= rigid rules. Most
families I've seen with rigid rules tend to have the most drama, and whilst
they usually have rigid divisions of labour, the rules typically blow the
stress level through the roof.

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ojbyrne
Kind of hyperbolic e.g. "every soul-draining search for a missing soccer
cleat," "the fieldworkers, most of them childless graduate students seeing
combat for the first time"

