

What do you think about the launchpage of my startup? - middleman90
http://signup.vousha.re/

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JimmyL
Get some editing help on the copy - it's got some seriously awkward phrasing.
Also, I've read it three times, and I'm still not sure what it is that your
company will do aside from "reinventing the world of coupons". If your value
proposition is that users won't have to "pay for a coupon to receive a
discount", you need some more explaining - I don't know what that means, but
I'm pretty sure I haven't done it (and hence wouldn't be motivated to sign
up).

Vaguely related: how should I be pronouncing the name? Is it two words ("vou-
share"), or a creative spelling of voucher to put the word "share" in there?

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gabemart
>I don't know what that means, but I'm pretty sure I haven't done it

I suspect it's a daily deals site that doesn't charge. Groupon that's free for
consumers.

I completely agree with your remarks on the copy, it doesn't read like it was
written by a native English speaker. Should be an easy fix.

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neumann_alfred
_"We are reinventing the world of coupons."_

Whoa, that's two of my "literary" pet peeves right there :(

"world of" when it doesn't even apply and should be left out (it's just like
"nothing short of", such stuff can be chained forever without adding one iota
of meaning to a sentence)

"reinvent" when you actually mean "improve".

Since that's all the info you're really given, this doesn't work for me, at
all.

~~~
neumann_alfred
To be slightly more constructive.. though I'm not sure what _exactly_ you are
planning to do, making coupons more useful, or less of a pain to deal with, is
a good thing, right?

It's just that overselling something with too grand language can really
backfire, it does on me in this case; combined with no real hard info it feels
like giving your email address for a cat in the bag. All I know about that cat
is that it likes marketing and coupons.

Why not just say "here's what we intend to do and how we'll do it, this is how
you can stay informed / in touch"?

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deviavir
Hey,

Tried to e-mail info@vousha.re but received "Relay access denied (state 13)",
please contact me chase[at]sweebr[dot]com for a business opportunity.

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NameNickHN
It doesn't work without JavaScript.

~~~
CalvinCopyright
Lots of things don't work without JavaScript.

I think it looks great. No scrolling!

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tekmate
am i missing something here?

i dont see any reason to make a simple 3 container page javascript dependent.

And even if you make a site that requires js to be functional you at least put
a fallback in there.

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binceipt
and also, what do you think about the launchpage of my startup, which you can
easily get there at <http://binceipt.com>

~~~
JimmyL
Same as above - get a native English-speaker (or if you have one, get a new
one with more professional writing experience) to redo your copy.

Also clarify who your product is aimed at. Is this something I as a consumer
sign-up for, or something that merchants sign up for and then provide to their
customers? Of your eight reasons I should sign up, for of them are essentially
the same thing ("you don't have to print anything") measured in different
ways.

If it's merchant-focused (which I think it is), show an example of how to
integrate with an existing POS system, and that you have a one-button pre-made
system to do this. As an SBO, my core competency isn't programming against an
API, and it isn't paying for a contractor do it do for me - it's selling
stuff. If you want me to add this to my existing sales workflow, it needs to
be beyond easy.

Add more detail about what exactly your product does, aside from provide
electronic receipts. How do I make these receipts? Can I as a business owner
customize them? What kind of reporting do I get? Similarly, add some
screenshots/action shots. Right now the only meaningful bit is one screen of
an iPhone app (I see nothing that you've customized on the iPad there), which
is small, unclear, doesn't follow the Apple UX guidelines, and doesn't have
the same look-and-feel of most other iPhone apps I have.

Once you've done all that and convinced me that I'd like to sign up, make it
easier to do so. From the main login page, I have to find a link in the
Bootstrap header (which has low contrast against its backdrop, then click a
tab, and then enter my information.

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marshallford
From what I can tell, it's not responsive.

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mrgreenfur
Who pays for coupons?

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robomartin
Your sign-up form shouldn't accept "test@example.com" as a valid address: No
valid MX DNS RR.

