
Life is Short (2016) - hvo
http://www.paulgraham.com/vb.html
======
Kuiper
For related reading, I recommend this Tim Urban piece, "The Tail End":
[https://waitbutwhy.com/2015/12/the-tail-
end.html](https://waitbutwhy.com/2015/12/the-tail-end.html)

 _I read about five books a year, so even though it feels like I’ll read an
endless number of books in the future, I actually have to choose only 300 of
all the books out there to read and accept that I’ll sign off for eternity
without knowing what goes on in all the rest._

...

 _I’ve been thinking about my parents, who are in their mid-60s. During my
first 18 years, I spent some time with my parents during at least 90% of my
days. But since heading off to college and then later moving out of Boston,
I’ve probably seen them an average of only five times a year each, for an
average of maybe two days each time. 10 days a year._

 _Being in their mid-60s, let’s continue to be super optimistic and say I’m
one of the incredibly lucky people to have both parents alive into my 60s.
That would give us about 30 more years of coexistence. If the ten days a year
thing holds, that’s 300 days left to hang with mom and dad. Less time than I
spent with them in any one of my 18 childhood years._

 _It turns out that when I graduated from high school, I had already used up
93% of my in-person parent time. I’m now enjoying the last 5% of that time.
We’re in the tail end._

~~~
lsc
>I read about five books a year, so even though it feels like I’ll read an
endless number of books in the future, I actually have to choose only 300 of
all the books out there to read and accept that I’ll sign off for eternity
without knowing what goes on in all the rest.

makes you want to take some time off and read, doesn't it?

~~~
crowbahr
I highly recommend audio books.

I tallied it up and last year I read 58 books averaging 1.8 hours of reading a
day.

It's great!

~~~
lsc
I don't think audiobooks are really the same; Maybe I just need to figure out
how to make it read faster, but so far it's just slower and less immersive.
Audio is a thing, like I really enjoy history podcasts when I'm doing other
things that require attention, but it's different from reading 'cause I'm not
immersed in the world of Mike Duncan or Nate DiMeo - I mean, I really enjoy
listening to them but it's like watching a movie on a screen; reading a book
is like watching a movie on a occulus rift (only, you know, good) I mean, one
of them is there in the room with you; the other becomes the room, absorbs all
attention.

~~~
ikurei
You can speed it up, and I've done that for some books, but I agree it's not
the same. Specially for books from which you want to extract actual concrete
knowledge, there is nothing like paper.

However, for the right books, audiobooks can be even better in my experience;
books where you want some "wisdom" and feelings more than concrete stuff, and
where a peaceful, somewhat-slow is appropriate.

I listened to Lab Girl, an intimate autobiography, read by the author, and it
was fantastic. I am now going over a book on buddhism, and because I don't
really care about remembering the details of Maharana's life, I love listening
instead of reading. With such a book, reading faster doesn't seem to make much
sense, I wanna go slow and savior its lessons.

In any case, it's been a good complement to my traditional reading; even when
it isn't the best way to read a book, it's a fantastic way to make the most of
commuting or doing chores.

------
euske
As a side note, not only one's life is short, but the entire human history is
short. I'm over 40 and it struck me that if I repeated my life 50 times it
would already go back B.C.! We've invented and developed ALL the things in
between. I don't think I could live 50 times and do that myself. That was some
amazing achievement, humans.

~~~
edpichler
Really good comment. Remind us that 2 thousand years seems a lot, but isn’t
that much.

If you let me, I advice you to study philisophy, and you shall realise that
our history is much bigger than our calendary. And if you study “The republic”
os Plato, you will see that our material achivements are improved a lot,for
sure, but the humanity as a whole civilization is in decay. Plato’s dialogues
explain how our civilization evolves and decays in cycles, and we are
currently in decay. Democracy is the system that currently rules the world,
and it is one step before tirany.

~~~
ahelwer
The 2400-year-old opinion of a specific philosopher, brilliant though they may
be, does not necessarily reflect reality. One of the harder mental blocks I
had to get through with philosophy, though it seems incredibly obvious both in
retrospect and to those who haven't yet encountered it, is that philosophers
write with no authority on metaphysical matters; any time a philosopher says
the nature of a thing is thus, they are surely wrong. This is contrasted with
technical matters, where it's possible and indeed common for our intellectual
giants to describe things precisely as they are. I mean this as no slight
against philosophy, nor to denigrate its utility, but as a simple observation
that your mode of engagement with the material must differ; see the common
interpretation that reading the philosophical corpus is more like listening in
on a conversation spanning the ages rather than learning a just-so list of
facts about our world.

~~~
edpichler
A "2400 year old opinion", to me it is a proof of how good and unbreakable it
is for surviving so many years. You are a very smart guy, more than me, for
sure, you also should try it, fight against your mental blocks and give a try
on philosophy, it can enlighten your life.

------
pmoriarty
By far the deepest and most eloquent writing on this subject that I've ever
read has been Seneca's _" On the Shortness of Life"_.[1][2]

[1] - [https://www.amazon.com/Shortness-Life-
Seneca/dp/1941129420/](https://www.amazon.com/Shortness-Life-
Seneca/dp/1941129420/)

[2] - [https://tripinsurancestore.com/4/on-the-shortness-of-
life.pd...](https://tripinsurancestore.com/4/on-the-shortness-of-life.pdf)

~~~
pdog
Seneca's _On the Shortness of Life_ is truly spectacular:

"It is not that we have a short time to live, but that we waste a lot of it...
Life is long if you know how to use it."

~~~
ianai
*have the ability to use it for your desires...the 40 hour work week leaves little for much else.

~~~
ekianjo
only if you do something you have no interest in for 40 hours a week.

~~~
HugoDaniel
I am building the pyramids so that some day a dead pharaoh can lay inside
them.

~~~
emodendroket
If only. You're lucky if something you worked on lasts more than a decade.

~~~
metaobject
Semi relevant note: When I followed the link PG has on his website for
'Hackers and Painters', Amazon reminded me that I ordered that book in 2005.

------
Waterluvian
I have a one year old and this is such empowering advice. I discovered a lot
of this on my own somehow, but reading that blog now reminds me to cut the
bullshit that somehow keeps creeping back in. When explaining to my boss and
peers why I was quitting my dream job, I would repeat, "life is fleeting, I
want to watch my son grow up."

I've had that wish for a few months now. I have another job that's a bit less
rewarding but I work from home and it's far more relaxed. I've already
remarked to myself or my wife a dozen moments that I would have missed if I
was elsewhere that day: at work, in traffic, etc.

I feel so blessed that I was lucky enough to figure this out this early in
life.

~~~
brianliou91
Hey! I've been trying to find positive stories of people who sacrificed work
for deeper personal lives. Would love to chat with you over email if possible!
My email is brian@teamleada.com

------
starpilot
This makes me so anxious and depressed. I'm convinced that nothing will make
you more unhappy than reading articles like this about how you're doing your
life wrong. A good life seems to come from being content with a bad one.

~~~
projektir
Agreed, life is a lot more enjoyable when you don't worry too much about how
you're living it wrong and wasting it.

I especially find the "you only get X weekends with Y" formulation depressing.
It makes it sound worse than it is, and enforces a valuation that may not at
all be true for you.

~~~
matte_black
even worse are revelations such as “You’ve already had 90% of the social
interaction you’ll ever have with X person”, where X could be someone like
your mother or father.

~~~
sattoshi
Time is such a lousy metric for things like that. I get so much more out of an
hour with my mother than I would have when I was 6.

That 5% of time may be a significant portion of the experience (for lack of a
better word).

------
lazyjones
Alright. This isn't Reddit, but: how do people find meaningful things to do
(instead of addictive, unrewarding habits) when options, at any particular
time, seem to be very limited (i.e. I have 2 hours, starting now - what's
available?)? Is it even possible to choose particular meaningful activities
consciously (e.g. why would I expect travelling to X to be a great experience
if I haven't done it before?), or do they happen by accident if you just
expose yourself to many different situations (like having kids)? It seems like
the "just say yes" principle is key - don't plan how to spend time based on
what you know, just try more things and stop doing what turns out pointless.
And, like pg writes, do it now.

Practical result: it's probably better to go to a new club you don't know yet
every time you go out, than to frequently visit your favourite one. Even if it
feels wrong to habitual animals like us.

Apologies for the rambling.

~~~
Woberto
I think one of the most meaningful things in life for many people is
connections to others, and it's something we can do easily during those
periods that you mention. For example, PG's post made me think about how I
could call my mom when taking a break since I don't see her often, and beyond
that I should probably spend more time texting people and keeping up other
such relationships.

~~~
ranic
This is good advice. And as far as "single-player" activities are concerned, I
think pursuing curiosities as far as your interest will go is a good way to
discover new interests. Read an article on a topic you find compelling? Find
additional reading material. Maybe take a class. Catch the urge to make
something? Go for it. Something might stick or it may not. Either way, you'll
have done something you might not have otherwise done and it won't have been a
waste of time.

~~~
lazyjones
> I think pursuing curiosities as far as your interest will go is a good way
> to discover new interests. Read an article on a topic you find compelling?
> Find additional reading material

As we get older, we develop stronger biases, so we think we can dismiss more
and more as not worthwhile without even trying it. That's why I believe some
outside influence is key.

------
goldenkey
I admire pg's sentiment here but I think the analysis is inaccurate.

There's all these "regret minimization" techniques and books out there - but
they all fail at one thing; giving the true reason for why every person will
ultimately have regrets: You are not you. The exhausted and tired you has
different weights assigned to activities, most strongly correlated with energy
required. The stimulated you after drinking 4 shots of expresso or taking
amphetamines, is more than willing to do the things that tired you would
probably have not done.

We wrestle with lazyness, consumption versus actual action, the great now for
the shitty future or vica versa. You really can't please all modes of thinking
-- ever. The deathbed mode of thinking is another entirely different beast.

But what pg says about "importance" vs "what matters" rings true and really
penetrates through this incompleteness of self-thought. Love is the only thing
that could never be wrong. Because it isn't a binary - it's not even just a
feeling - it's a thing that modes of thought can't erase despite their
different weighting schemes.

Do whatever you do - but do it for love. I promise you it won't be a regret.

------
thiago_fm
might be good to be pg and have plenty of time to spenD with its own kid,
after doing a phd in one of the most expensive colleges in the US, selling a
company for tons of money, creating a extremely successful incubator

i used to enjoy his essays for a long time, til i started to see how out of
the world of most people even the basic stuff he writes there -- he is able to
afford to spend time doing stuff nobody can, then it's kinda of easy to be
successful at whatever he does.

~~~
pmoriarty
This reminds me of Maslow's Heirarchy of Needs.[1]

It has often been described as a pyramid, with physiological needs at the
bottom, and self-actualization (or maybe self-transcendence) at the top. The
full heirarchy is:

    
    
      - Self-transcendence
      - Self-actualization
      - Esteem
      - Social belonging
      - Safety needs
      - Physiological needs
    

It's difficult for the higher needs to matter much when one hasn't fulfilled
the lower ones.

[1] -
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maslow%27s_heirarchy_of_needs](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maslow%27s_heirarchy_of_needs)

~~~
projektir
I don't really think this is correct.

People who have issues getting basic needs met are just unlikely to also get
their higher needs met. But I the misunderstanding of needs is also why people
do things like smoke and drink and people from more healthy backgrounds don't
understand why.

And people have been known to forgo comfort for causes. The basic things
matter because without them you will often be in danger, but they don't
necessarily matter psychologically.

I think self-actualization, i.e., some degree of mattering, some degree of
respect, is important to pretty much everyone, it's just that if you are
lacking food and shelter you're also probably having trouble finding a
purpose, as well.

------
agumonkey
Telling a weird and only slightly related to the 'not waiting' part of this
article (which I like).

I recently got bitten by bitcoin trading. Knowing nothing about trading it was
extremely wasteful. Also soulless... every dollar I made was someone else's
loss. But it made me approach waiting and time efficiency differently. I'm a
very attentist person.. I wait.. waiiit.. In bitcoin there's a tension (I did
minute scalping) to get started and leave at the right time. Also since no one
wants to wait watching charts, it made me learn rust/kotlin in the mean time
with way more energy. Stretching and working out too.

Surprisingly this stupid activity gave floor to other more fulfilling ones.
Life is complex sometimes.

ps: sometimes too life make you blind to what would be your perfect life and
then you miss it. uneasy feeling to get over.

~~~
zitterbewegung
I'm sorry you had a bad experience with that. I had the opposite experience
where I started to get back into to bitcoin with a set of small trades and
turned a small profit. I bought some more bitcoin and ethereum. The objective
for me though was to learn the platform. It actually made me think of new
ideas about how you could use the platform. I personally think that you need
some skin in the game to truely understand some technology.

My perspective through trading bitcoin is that it isn't as zero sum as you say
but more like your gain and someones loss could be seen as you are interacting
with a system that may make people money in the long run.

I think its good though that you started to learn Kotlin and Rust and maybe
you are being a bit too hard on your self of being guilting when you are
trading cryptocurrencies.

~~~
haihaibye
Crypto peaked at 707 billion, according to CoinMarketCap. Less than three
months later, market cap has now plunged by 65% to $245 billion, a drop of
$462B.

Given how high transaction costs are (and production via electricity usage)
crypto trading is almost certainly negative sum.

The only way it wouldn't be is if the non-monetary benefits (eg sense of
security for different asset class, online purchases) exceed the electrical
inputs.

I would be very surprised if it does given eg Steam and Bitcoin conferences
stopped accepting crypto payment and the sense of security in an asset class
is low after seeing -65% returns in a quarter.

------
gilbetron
A pleasant essay, but I think it is a bit dismissive of the situations people
are in. A simple example is the teenagers he mentions. You can't help but
worry a ton about what people think about you as a teenager - your "social
subprocess" has just kicked on, and you are overwhelmed by a great number of
new senses and feelings. Telling a teenager not to worry about things does
nothing but make everything worse. I can come up to you and inject you with
adrenaline and nothing you do (short of medical intervention) will make you
feel calm, and certainly me telling you to "just calm down" isn't going to
help.

The essay is well intended, and well written as usual, I just have an issue
with the underlying assumption that people can simply change everything as
desired.

~~~
2ion
It's the gospel of someone who experienced, by common standards, extreme
success. No more, no less. I find his essays mostly to be opinion pieces
without exceptional insights or conclusions that would make them stand out if
they were not attached to his persona.

~~~
aaron-lebo
I still enjoy reading some of his stuff, but over the years I've realized that
most of his writing lacks any rigor or evidence for what he says. He'd be a
much better writer if it weren't for the way people read his good and usually
thoughtful writing and take it for truth. This happens as you say due to him
being successful, which I find kind of pernicious. I've found some of his
stuff in hindsight simply wrong, but he'll never go back and correct it, nor
will people listen to criticism.

My only wish was he was more cognizant of this and wrote accordingly, but his
writing has gotten less rigorous and more flowery over the years, not less.
It's a real problem across tech. I've read some comments on HN describing tech
as devoid of culture, which has some truth to it, but the bigger issue is we
don't really care about evidence, and that comes from the top.

~~~
pm90
I've actually noticed that too. I remember reading his articles from the early
days of HN and being enamored by their insights... mad respect. But then he
tweeted something along the lines of "There's no Uber or Lyft here in Austin,
Texas. How do I get anywhere?!" (Uber and Lyft had left Austin at the time)
which fundamentally changed my view of the guy.

------
theomega
Sam Altman published a very related piece three years ago:

“The days are long but the decades are short” [https://blog.samaltman.com/the-
days-are-long-but-the-decades...](https://blog.samaltman.com/the-days-are-
long-but-the-decades-are-short)

~~~
Micoloth
You are right, it's a nice article!

------
thsowers
> After my mother died, I wished I'd spent more time with her. I lived as if
> she'd always be there.

I love this article, and this line has always hit me particularly hard. He
goes on to mention that she encouraged this illusion, and I think many people
who are older do this as well.

As someone who is going through something similar, what do you do in this
situation? Of course you can adjust your life to live as if people won't
always be there, but how do you get them to stop encouraging the illusion?

------
pendar747
I definitely agree with this article and believe that life is short, but it's
also a good idea to relax and not worry about it all too much. I think the
relaxing and having a piece of mind is undervalued by most people. It helps
you have a better quality life however short it is. Remember that the time you
spend on worrying about how short it is is also part of your life which you
are kind of wasting. Having said that I agree that we should consider the
bullshit in our life and cut in favor of things that we really want to do,
because at the end life is to short for that.

------
subcosmos
"Relentlessly prune bullshit, don't wait to do things that matter, and savor
the time you have. That's what you do when life is short."

Wise words. It took me a long time to learn this the hard way.

------
evincarofautumn
I see this and I understand the sentiment but my emotional reaction is
basically “Nah.”

Life is long and good. Even when shitty things happen to you, it’s a gift to
be alive. (A gift from whom, you might ask? Probably nobody, but nobody knows!
Isn’t that exciting?) I’m about to celebrate my 10,000th day on Earth. That’s
a lot of days! And I have a couple times that more ahead of me if I’m lucky
and I do some exercise.

I’m not waiting to do things that matter to me, not because the clock is
ticking, but because I _want_ to do them now. And I might not want to do them
later, so it’d be a shame if I didn’t.

Of course I’m terrified of the day it ends. It keeps me up almost every night.
But pragmatically, the more I think about that, the less I enjoy the time I
have. And I plan to arrange a good vitrification at the end of things so I
have a small chance of coming back for an encore. You’ve got to be practical
about life, but you don’t need to be pessimistic. Life may not be long
_enough_ , but it is long.

~~~
v64
Couldn't have said it better myself. I went on a trip with a friend for my day
10k celebration, hope yours is a good one :)

------
ColinWright
Related: two of President John Tyler's Grandsons Are Still Alive.

[http://mentalfloss.com/article/29842/president-john-
tylers-g...](http://mentalfloss.com/article/29842/president-john-tylers-
grandsons-are-still-alive)

John Tyler was born in 1790, and he took office in 1841.

------
japhyr
Oh my. My son is 7, and I know time with him will fly by. But realizing I can
count the childhood Christmases that we have remaining hits me so much harder
than knowing his childhood will fly by in general

I savor every day with him, even when I'm busy and a bit frustrated. I tell
him that as well.

Reading the opening part of this hit me in the gut.

------
waytogo
Interesting piece but perspective matters.

> don't wait to do things that matter, and savor the time you have. That's
> what you do when life is short.

It depends on your situation. If you cashed out and don't have to worry about
paying rent and feeding your family (like Paul) then it's easy to spend more
time with your family.

If not: You are constantly torn between spending time with your family and
getting your startup/career/job right to be able to finance the next
vacation/school/flat. It's actually even worse. Every minute you spend with
your family you face opportunity costs losing money you could invest into your
family. If you work only your kids won't remember you.

Try to cash out before you hit 25, not later than 30.

~~~
oceanman888
I am not from silicon valley, is cashing out before 25 that usual? How much
money are you talking about?

~~~
quickthrower2
At macro scale not everyone can retire early. It's a pyramid of sorts. Who is
going to wash the rich person's car? Until we have very advance tech, the
answer is the person who didn't get lucky and cash out at 25.

------
dwheeler
Nice article, and I agree, life is short.

This is, of course, not a new observation. It's Easter, so here are a few
Biblical quotes with the same sentiment:

"What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then
vanishes." (James 4:14 ESV)

"Man is like a breath; his days are like a passing shadow." (Psalm 144:4 ESV)

It's an old observation... but it's also timeless. It's good to be reminded.
Thanks.

------
Avshalom
the corollary to "time flies when you're having fun" is that misery never
ends. Chronic depression and entry level retail is the next worst thing to
immortality...

------
matte_black
For those with kids, is it better to have them early, or later?

I’ve always thought it’s better to wait until at least my late 30s, so I can
live the first half of my life completely on my terms. My father was in his
late 30s when I was born, and I think it was a pretty good decision on his
part.

~~~
Kuiper
I have a friend who was in his late 30's when he had his first kid. Now, he is
50 years old, his youngest kid is 8 years old, and I have heard him remark on
several occasions that when he is attending his second child's high school
graduation, he will be a 60-year-old man.

I've heard him remark somewhat wistfully that he wishes he had been able to
spend his 30's (when he was younger and had more energy) running around in the
park and tossing around a frisbee or rollerblading with them, rather than
struggling to keep up with them now as a 50-year-old. And mind you, he's a
pretty healthy guy (was a college athlete, not currently overweight or with
any chronic health problems), he can bench press more than most guys half his
age, and he still wishes he'd had those younger years to spend with his kids.
I've also heard him mention once (in a much more somber tone) that if his sons
wait as long as he did to have kids, he might not get to see his grandkids
grow up, and even if he does get to watch them grow up, he will be a very old
man by the time they're old enough to swim or throw a frisbee. (If physically
keeping up with your kids as a 50-year-old is tough, imagine trying to do the
same thing as a 80-year-old grandparent.)

Here's a question: would you rather spend your 30's globetrotting (or
otherwise "living life on your own terms"), and then be raising kids into your
50's? Or would you rather spend your 30's raising kids, and then have your
50's to go on globetrotting adventures? Everything I've heard from parents
tells me that raising kids takes immensely more energy than touring Europe.

Another thing that might go overlooked is that although I've seen some parents
abandon hobbies to spend more time with their kids, I've seen some people with
hobbies that they've gotten to share with kids that have been a great bonding
experience, be it something like woodworking or playing a musical instrument
or a martial art or running a side business on Etsy. And even if it's
something that doesn't involve the kid, parents still get to have lives; I
have a friend who has a full time job, is raising three kids, and still
managed to write a novel in the past year. Modern American society has
burdened parents (and kids) with lots of obligations like soccer
practice/youth sports league of your choice, a constant regiment of scheduled
afterschool activities and an attitude that says if you let your kids play in
the park unsupervised you're a neglectful parent, but most of the anecdata
I've observed tells me that both parents and kids seem to enjoy themselves
more and have better relationships when they have large amounts of unscheduled
time during the week; one of the things I'm most grateful to my parents for is
the large amounts of time that they left me to entertain myself and discover
my own hobbies.

Here's another thing: after your kids grow up, you (hopefully) get to be
friends with them. My parents (now mid-late 50's) are empty nesters, and one
thing that I'm constantly struck by is how much I enjoy being _friends_ with
them, traveling back to their part of the country once a year to go on
vacations together once a year, calling them every week to commiserate about
the trials of adult life, and so on. We have the kind of incredibly tight
familial bond that you only get from living under the same roof with someone
for 18 years _and_ they're also incredibly good friends. If all goes well,
I'll be able to spend the next several decades with my parents continuing to
be a part of my life, and that's something that I'm immensely grateful for.
The earlier you have kids, the more years of your life that you get to spend
with them, and the more years of their life they get to spend with you.

~~~
rsyngh
With regards to the children argument I have largely seen the opposite where
the parents directly/indirectly confess that they to a large degree regret
having kids in their 30s /20s and would have rather globetrotted or did their
own version of their pursuit of happiness.

My point is not that children are the source of the problem but that these
things about what you would rather do is personal to each human.I don't think
one can make a blanket statement about rasing kids or doing you thing as there
are quite many people on either side who regret the path that they have taken.

Also your bond with your parents is quite heartwarming and I hope you od
realize how lucky you are to have that.

------
ajeet_dhaliwal
Read it before a couple of times but always good to read it again, it is my
favorite Paul Graham essay.

------
dlwdlw
Life is short for those that have triggered immortal processes. There are no
easy ways to do this however. (the easiest way being starting a family)

Most people probably feel that life is too long and boring and are always
looking for something to do.

It's probably somewhat offensive to these people to claim life is too short
when their major negative emotion day to day is ennui.

I think the internet has exacerbated this problem for some people. Those who
can't bring themselves to do things because they can easily see that it's
already been done before but weren't young enough to grow up in this new
environment to easily consider doing things like game streaming or YouTube
channels.

~~~
dlwdlw
Should add that for many tech people the immoetal process often chosen is
founding a company. Without a source of meaning like children they often don't
have the motivation to grind out the rest of their days as a cog

------
tabtab
Arguing on-line can be a _good_ thing: it sharpens both your logic and
articulation skills. If you don't like on-line debate, you can leave.

A good online debate ends up looking like a geometry proof: based on these
givens, here's the logical conclusion using cold, hard, and clear logic.

Now, it may be that people disagree with the givens, being that many of them
depend on assumptions of human behavior and psychology that would take
million$ to settle in controlled studies, but at least one narrows down the
reasons for their preference. Another reader can then "shop the proofs" and
select the one with givens that best match their own circumstances or shop
practices. Thus, good debates create clear(er) decision trees even though
disagreements remain. Parameters will remain parameters.

------
visarga
"Life is too short" is also the core tenet of a philosophy called "Memento
Mori" (remember that you will die!). It was even used as a greeting, instead
of "hello" by the members of certain religious sects.

[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Memento_mori](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Memento_mori)

<rant> But the opposite is also true: while I am alive, I am never dead (as
silly as it sounds). I never experience death. For me it is an eternal now
which is always alive. Should I worry about things I will never experience? We
only experience the death of others, we don't know what it is like not to be
alive 100 years from now. Why should we care about that when we are in an
eternal now that is always alive?

One way to deal with death is to leave something of you behind - kids, ideas
or social impact. Another way is to remember that there is a great number of
people who died as well - everyone before a certain birth date in fact. It's
not like going in a strange place, it's like going where all these great
people went before us.

When we die we're divided - the matter that was in our bodies goes to earth
and is recycled in nature, possibly becoming part of another life. The genes
pass on to our kids and our grandchildren, then spreading out in a vast number
of people 10 or 20 generations later; genes have a life of their own. The
ideas we had fly from mouth to mouth, having a life of their own as well. The
memories are left with our friends and family and will have a second death
when they die. But does it matter to you if you're remembered by someone who
is not close to you? The life that was in us just reinvents itself again.
We're split into pieces and every piece goes right where it should.

Another thing to ponder about: what else is a lot like death? In a sense, it's
the time before we were born. It was like death, because we didn't exist, and
then we came into being. How was it before we were born? Was it a bad
experience? We have had eons of death before our short ~80 year span and it
didn't affect us negatively one bit. If we're not affected by the 'no-life' of
the time before we were born, why should we be affected by the 'no-life' that
will be after we die?

In the end, what is important? I think all reasons in life are related to
survival instincts. Even learning to walk and grasp, or how to function as a
member of society, or how to date and how to raise children - they are all in
the service of self replication (and protecting one's life). Our fundamental
reason for being is self replication, and all our "good things in life" come
from things that support it. Thus it is this recursive loop that creates the
root value (that of being alive) and from it come all our other values.

But this kind of thinking is relative. When we're lifting ourselves from the
basic loop of survival, we see how many of the things we hold dear and
important are irrelevant. There is no universal good or reason to be. Meaning
is being invented every moment and we're in control of it. We should think
ourselves free and ignore the survival game as much as we like. That's the
beauty of it - we're free to reinvent ourselves, or to embrace our instincts
and values, which have been chiseled by countless generations of genetic
selection before us. One strategy is exploration (there's no rule, we could be
anything), and the other exploitation (holding dear the good things in life,
those which fit our survival instincts). They're both valid. </>

~~~
dionidium
I use this sentiment as a sort of a trick to help combat anxiety. There may be
a billion universes in which I die this week, but it can’t be this one,
because I am subjectively alive and experiencing this one. I can only
experience the timeline in which I live. There may be other timelines, but I
wouldn’t know about them, because I’m alive in this one.

I don’t experience the timelines where I do/did die, by definition. I can only
enjoy the one in which I don’t/didn’t.

------
barking
OTOH eat drink and be merry, for tomorrow we die

------
solidify
No matter what you do, life will always feel short.

------
Swizec
Life isn’t short, it’s the longest thing you’ll ever do.

------
hourislate
Who is this man? I wish I could be his friend.

