
Ask HN: Quit after burning +$120,000? - LostFounder
Last January I founded a startup to commercialize a technology I invented, which solves foundational problems in one of the world&#x27;s most valuable industries. After six months pursuing my original vision, I discovered an exponentially better solution and made a hard pivot.<p>I believe this new version of the technology could make the industry&#x27;s incumbents obsolete virtually overnight. In the hands of a competent executive, the company to bring the technology to market (and to own the underlying patents) could grow into one of the most valuable corporations in the world.<p>But maybe I&#x27;m not that guy. I&#x27;ve burned through +$120,000 of seed capital (from myself and people close to me), and still don&#x27;t have a polished demo. I&#x27;ve lost all credibility with the brilliant engineer I recruited, since for half a year I&#x27;ve been promising a whitepaper I can&#x27;t make myself finish because I have such bad anxiety.<p>The worse I perform as CEO, the more I feel like an impostor, and the harder it is to break the cycle. I could walk away and earn enough money in my old career to pay back my investors (for moral reasons), but I&#x27;d hate myself for giving up. How do I go about righting the ship?
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pdm55
I walked away from the university research world. I think about the projects I
left behind nearly every day. My key project took 5 years and I felt that
everything had happened too slowly to be worthwhile. How wrong I was: I
finally had the work published in 2017 after it had sat in a drawer for 17
years. But now I am too long away from the research community to attract
grants. The best thing I could have done at the crisis point would have been
to have gotten help from others in the field. My advice is, "Don't quit. Ask
for help."

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LostFounder
Wow. Thanks so much for sharing your story. I'm only around six months behind
the point when I feel I should have been able to publish a draft, so hearing
about a 17-year delay puts things in perspective.

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brador
Truth is that draft could be finished in a day or two. Your real problem is
the anxiety. Learn meditation, 10 minutes of deep breathing when you wake.
Just you, sit on the floor and breath deep. 10 minutes.

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cl42
Your friends, family, etc. who funded you initially did so because they care
about you and are excited for you to try this. Unless you specifically
committed to paying them back, you really need not do this. They might even be
better off if you were to take any funds you have left over to commercialize
what you are trying to do.

Many technical experts are not great CEOs -- they can be perfectionists, or
get anxious when dealing with people, or there are unlimited other reasons.
You might want to seek out a business partner (or mentor, or advisor) who
might help you on the business side.

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LostFounder
I think that input from someone else with more experience in the startup and
VC world would be invaluable, but I'm not sure how to build the relationship
or connections that would be needed. The ones I have right now are with people
whose VC firms I'd like to raise money from in the future, so I can't really
tap those for help getting out of a rut.

I spent $4,000 to get executive coaching, and initially felt much better from
not being isolated working on these challenges alone. But it ended up being
more hand-wavey than practical. If you have any suggestions for connecting
with the right people, I'd be quite grateful.

Thanks for taking the time to offer feedback.

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cl42
I encourage you to share your concerns with the potential VCs or investors. My
favorite investors (and the ones I ended up working with for a long time) are
ones who were comfortable helping me, saw where my strengths/weaknesses were,
and _still_ wanted to work with me. If an investor (seed, angel, VC, etc.)
doesn't want to help you get out of a rut, then you probably don't want to
take their money later. You'll end up in a world of hurt.

If that doesn't make you more comfortable, if you're willing to share more
info on your idea + your location, I might be able to provide some limited
advice. Note that I likely don't have any subject matter expertise related to
your specific business idea, though.

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LostFounder
Those would be some pretty special investors to find! Quite different from my
experiences to date, which underscores that things aren't going right.

I'd love to share more. Would you mind shooting an email to
lostfounder@mail.com?

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cl42
Done! Looking forward to hearing from you.

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alexnewman
Get a dayjob, keep pushing the idea forward, don't bother paying anyone back

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LostFounder
Thanks for the feedback. I've done some work on the side recently to help with
cash flow. The problem is that if I have work I can do to earn money that
doesn't make me feel anxious, it's even harder to motivate myself to focus on
the thing that makes me feel like a failure/impostor, even if I objectively
believe that the risk-adjusted value of doing the latter work is orders of
magnitude higher.

~~~
alexnewman
Its good that you feel like a failure or imposter. You probably aren't but
it's fine to feel that way. Love your people,stay focused and take care of
yourself.

