
How to survive a job you hate - pyskool
http://pyskool.com/survive-job-you-absolutely-hate/
======
navs
I'm currently in a similar situation. I'm in New Zealand under a job search
visa. I've been promised a full work visa so I'm sticking with it no matter
how much I hate it. It's pretty hard finding a new job with my limited skills
and my not being a local resident.

I try and find the time to build up my skills which is already a source of
much anxiety. I came from a LAMP background building websites as a freelancer
before I went off to University to make it official. Coming out of Uni, it's
like I'm starting from scratch. Go, Dart, a plethora of frontend tech. It's
enough to make me insecure.

I've become very frugal. Heck, I don't even have health insurance. I have a
tiny shoebox apartment kitchen so stocking up and cooking is pretty difficult.
I tend to wait for the supermarket deli to do its clearance in the evening.
Half price off all sandwiches!

I've also been diagnosed with chronic depression so it's not like things were
so great even before the job. This leads me to what the author said on
'Changing your environment'. I've developed a lot of bad habits and while I've
attempted CBT, a lot of the time I just go back into that cesspool of
depression, of eating copious amounts of terrible food, sleeping all day and
putting off all work. I could have a better job and still end up the same way,
I'm aware of that possibility.

Another thing that I keep telling myself is this is a job, it's work. It was
never meant to be fun and games.

~~~
mattmanser
No-one uses Go in the real world. And Dart is used even less than that.

As for the rest of it, you've just entered the most in demand profession on
the planet, you've got a degree in it and already have prior experience.

You've got a lot to be hopeful (and proud) about. Build relationships and you
will find work to love, not endure.

~~~
kkowalczyk
Here's a list of no-ones using Go in the real world:
[https://code.google.com/p/go-wiki/wiki/GoUsers](https://code.google.com/p/go-
wiki/wiki/GoUsers)

~~~
mattmanser
It was hyperbole, I'm simply saying there are a hundred if not 10,000 times
more jobs in PHP than Go and will be for the foreseeable future.

HN is a oracle of tech, but a lot of it gos nowhere. And Go's still in the
early stages. I remember the 3 months or so everyone here was raving about how
Twisted was the next big thing.

------
rjzzleep
i was advised to engage with the guy/manager i really hated. as in talk to him
every day, ask and see what he likes. you know, make him feel like he's
important to me. once he's in his comfort zone, things may change. it doesn't
really mean you'll like him, but it'll get him off your back.

I was also given two other valuable pieces of advice.

1\. try asking the 5 whys [1]. for those that don't know it's basically a
simple technique to find out why people do the things they do. it doesn't have
to be a good reason, but most of the times it's not a malicious reason why
people do things. sometimes though it's malicious. you should be wary of those
people.

2\. don't marry your job. there's no point getting emotional about things you
don't own. in the end you own the things you do in your free time and what you
get paid for is your job. so if someone does an incredibly stupid decision,
it's their problem.

in practice though, i have problems not getting emotional when people are
trying to do incredibly stupid decisions.

[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/5_Whys](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/5_Whys)

edit: added google cache link
[http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:pyskool...](http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:pyskool.com/survive-
job-you-absolutely-hate/)

~~~
wwweston
> in the end you own the things you do in your free time

* subject to the terms of your employment agreement and applicable state and federal law.

~~~
michaelochurch
_subject to the terms of your employment agreement and applicable state and
federal law._

If any employer tries to assert ownership of a non-work-related side
project...

    
    
        1. It would not be hard to challenge that in court. For example, the employer does 
          not own personal communications. They cannot read your private email, much less 
          assert copyright over it.
        2. The very fact should be outed here, on Slashdot, on Lobsters, and on Valleywag. 
          It will ruin that company's reputation, and that ruin will be deserved.

~~~
ojbyrne
Curious - what is "Lobsters?"

~~~
jeorgun
[https://lobste.rs/](https://lobste.rs/) , I'm assuming.

------
BrianYesh
It's possible that you are responsible for your crappy situation. But it's
also possible someone is harassing you and THAT is why your environment sux.
It isn't the victim's fault that they are being harassed. This may not have
happened to the guy who wrote this. But lets be more open minded and
empathetic about the many causes of crappy work environments.

~~~
pyskool
I have updated the original article to make this clearer: If you are facing
discrimination or bullying, leave immediately! And perhaps consult a lawyer as
well.

The article was directed mainly at people who hate their jobs, but not enough
to quit (because of fear, because they don't think they are good enough to get
another one etc). So they keep showing up, in the misplaced opinion that it
will get better.

But it doesn't, and one day all their fears are realised, when they wake up to
find they are no longer employable, because they spent all their time just
coasting through life, doing the bare minimum.

If a person is in this situation, they need to accept responsibility, and
start making plans to move on. This process is hard and time consuming, which
is why I say: First improve your skills, then move to a better job. Don't move
from one Dilbert company to another. Rather, move to some place that will
recognise and reward your skills.

~~~
vonmoltke
> The article was directed mainly at people who hate their jobs, but not
> enough to quit (because of fear, because they don't think they are good
> enough to get another one etc).

Quit on what terms? Before or after finding another position?

------
ChristianMarks
I left an abusive working environment. High turnover places exist. The
American business press likes to tell oppressed employees to take their
torturer's perspective, to become one with their abuser, to act with the
supreme, Zen-like indifference of the Buddha and meditate their personal Hell
out of existence.

The year I left, 16 people out of around 30 left, 8 after I did. I didn't have
a job waiting for me, but it was a tremendous relief not to be constantly
hectored in email at all hours, seven days a week. Continually having work
boundaries tested is not for me. The chronic mistreatment was bad for my
hemorrhoids, I informed them. (I don't necessarily believe in taking the
masochistic high road in all cases.)

------
seivan
'Changing your environment will not change your circumstances'

That can't be true, can it? Isn't that the point? Your environment seemed
toxic, so you leave it for a non-toxic place.

You can change your circumstances at the job, but that doesn't make the
senior-managements behavior any less toxic?

~~~
pyskool
Perhaps I wasn't clear in the original post.

If you are facing bullying, racism or sexism (or indeed any other -ism), then
yes, leave immediately.

But for most of us, it's not outright bullying, but the constant grinding
down, the non-stop requests for overtime, the occasional "helpful comments"
that are actually insults, the constant interference, that really gets us
down. Individually, they might mean nothing, but over time, they build up, and
make you feel as small as the full stop at the end of this sentence. That's
when you must plan to leave, but by first upgrading your skills.

------
UK-AL
Sounds like this guy suffers from just-world syndrome.

I've been in a bad situation, my only regret is not getting out sooner.

------
angersock
We've all been there...for folks there right now, don't worry, things get
better.

Other people are going through the same thing, and it's normal to be unhappy
with things at a bad place: it isn't your fault, and you deserve better. Talk
with people, get support, and try to find a way out.

~~~
pyskool
"Talk with people, get support, and try to find a way out."

This is very good advice, but so rarely followed.

The problem is, most programmers are shy and reserved, and besides, they don't
understand (or at least I didn't) that their problems aren't unique. That
hundreds and thousands of programmers before them have faced this exact
problem and survived. And not just survived, but thrived.

In the long term, it doesn't matter. But in the short term, it can feel like
the world is ending.

------
alashley
So I'm wondering, if you're in a place where they expect you to work overtime
without paying you, They take away salary for "equity" that never comes, they
constantly call and email you outside of normal business hours, and they come
in on a Friday at 4 pm and tell you that they need you to work all weekend,
also, they arbitrarily move deadlines forward, what do you do then?

This may or may not be something that happened to a friend of a friend of
mine.

~~~
hrktb
I think you look for anyone reliable (family, friend, social helper,
counselor...) to help you get out of that, because you might not be able to do
it just by yourself (or you'll have done it already). Just like any other long
lasting abusive relationship.

~~~
alashley
Working on it, but its a process.

------
arnorb
OP's link is down, cached version:
[http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:1JZ6-n7...](http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:1JZ6-n7RO0cJ:pyskool.com/survive-
job-you-absolutely-hate/+&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=is)

------
fsk
There are good work environments and bad work environments. I've seen both,
and it does make a difference.

If it really is a bad environment, you probably can't change or improve it.
Otherwise, it wouldn't be a bad environment.

Sometimes, finding a new job is the correct answer.

------
NerdfaceKillah
Life is too short to work at a job you hate every day.

~~~
pyrrhotech
what if the problem isn't the job, but that you are lazy and/or don't like
"working"? Quit life?

~~~
romanovcode
If one hates working as software developer no matter the language and other
environments he has chosen wrong profession.

------
CmonDev
"that being technically good is good enough to get promoted and get pay rises"
\- it's not?

------
wudf
West coast is so soft.

------
uladzislau
If you hate your job you should quit asap. End of story.

~~~
hrktb
It's a common enough way to put it, I think it needs commentary. Putting it
the other way round it becomes funny:

\- If you love your job you shouldn't leave it for any reason

\- Conditions and circumstances don't matter, do something you like

\- Your 8h at work are more important than the 16h left in the day

------
NerdfaceKillah
You quit.

------
benched
I'm walking the tightrope of surviving a work environment I despise right now.
The crux of the game I'm currently locked in is I naively accepted a
relocation package, provided in true corporate style by several layers of
delightfully asinine outsourced middleman companies. If I leave before a
certain date, I'm on the hook for the inflated dollar amount of all that
"service", even though I could have moved myself for a tiny fraction of that
value. Movers and shakers of the world, keep on making up games for everybody
else to play, so we never get bored.

~~~
pyskool
I had the exact same problem. That relocation package doesn't look so hot now,
does it?

I now follow a few rules before accepting a package like this:

1\. It must be pro-rata- That means that the amount you need to pay back must
go down with time. So if you leave after 1 year of a 2 year notice period, you
must only pay back 50%.

2\. Like you discovered, the company can overpay for services and stick you
with the bill. So always insist on paying for relocation yourself, and get
money back via a expenses form. You will be short of cash in the short term,
but it will save you pain in the long term.

3\. If possible, try to negotiate a "hiring bonus." This may not be possible
unless you are famous (or needed for a critical project), but if you can get
the company to give you some extra cash, you can pay for relocation yourself.
This is the best option, as you owe the company nothing.

~~~
x0x0
caveat: hiring bonus is taxeable, so you can't expect to net 60-65 percent;
reimbursed relocation expenses aren't per my understanding

so the company has to boost the hiring bonus by 2/3 to get you to where you
would be otherwise

