
Ask HN: Who recovered from bad sleep problems? - yonnadri
It’s now been almost 8 years that I’m not having proper amount of deep sleep, not insomnia, just poor sleep quality. And I‘m tired of trying things that actually don’t work (good habits, healthy life, sleep restriction, medical analysis..). So who actually made it through this and how ?
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softwaredoug
“Recovered” hmm. But certainly much better compared to a year ago.

First _definitely_ see a doctor. Lots of conditions like sleep apnea or
periodic leg movements can prevent deep sleep.

For me, I have found that anxiety was the root cause of not getting enough
deep sleep. My life is so full with kids, work, etc that I can feel like I’m
in a constant state of vigilance. What’s helped me:

\- Journaling before bed, write down all my worries and cares. Feel all the
bottled up feels, etc. also any TODOs. Just get it all out of your head

\- talking to a loved one a lot about the same. Just getting it all off my
chest

\- meditation

\- taking breaks from everything for solitude and self care

\- exercise

\- disconnecting from electronics and reading a relaxing paper book an hour
before bed

I’d recommend the book The Sleep Solution by Chris Winter.

~~~
yonnadri
I did see a doctor and did all the tests for common sleeping troubles, but
they didn’t find anything specific.

I can define myself as a relatively anxious person and it’s very hard for me
to relax fully, but even when I am in good conditions to do it (I did a 6
months break from my work, away from computer and any source of trouble) it’s
still the same.

I did talk a lot about this to my ex, but it didn’t really help me and now I
tend to act as everything was normal because I can’t complain everytimes this
is happening, almost every night.

But I do feel like a pressure on my chest, but I still didn’t find any way of
getting rid of it, I kind of feel this is due to the lack of sleep.

Do you feel any change in your state of vigilance ? What actually changed in
your mindset to get better ?

Thank you for the book, I already read a lot of them, but still didn’t the one
with a solution..

~~~
softwaredoug
I think the best sleep advice I have gotten for general insomnia (that I've
used some) is to live life like bootcamp

\- Always wake up at the same time (like 7AM) \- Immediately exercise outside
(wakes you up and helps fight fatigue)

I've also had anxiety cause or exacerbate many physical symptoms that cause
poor sleep. Namely heartburn, frequent urination, and other issues. Seen so
many specialists for these things, but the causality is always shaky and
anxiety IS something I have at least some influence over, so I focus on that,
and it helps a lot...

But of course your mileage may vary, just sharing what helped me

------
Memosyne
This advice may not be applicable to you, but have you tried sleeping during
the day and working through the night? I used to struggle with headaches and
poor sleep until I realized that I simply couldn't be productive during the
day. I often like to joke about how I might have some vampire blood in my
lineage.

~~~
yonnadri
Sadly not really applicable to my job.. Or maybe I should apply for a vampire
job as well ! But do you still have the same 24h day pattern ? Because I do
feel this could be an issue for me, like 25h days would be the best

