
My Time at Google and After - dsr12
https://medium.com/@jennifer.blakely/my-time-at-google-and-after-b0af688ec3ab
======
ProAm
Is having an affair a #MeToo movement thing? This is a horrible story, but he
didnt force her to do things at work, did not take advantage of his position,
did not harass her because she was of the opposite sex unless Im
misunderstanding what #MeToo is about. He lied about his marriage, but it
wasn't him who forced her out of her job, it was a 'violation of Google’s new
policy which went from “discouraging” direct-reporting-line relationships to
outright banning them'. She should have known about that policy too?

This just sounds like an affair gone horribly wrong between two people that
worked at the same company. I feel bad for the kid.

~~~
brown9-2
When Google instituted a policy against relationships with direct-line
managers and one of the reports, why does the woman have to be the one to move
to new departments to resolve the issue?

~~~
solipsism
It doesn't say she was forced to. What makes you assume she didn't choose to?

------
Balgair
> David and I began an affair shortly after that night and we were together
> for years. The first time we got pregnant was in 2005. I was travelling in
> Europe when I miscarried, about 3 months into my pregnancy. I phoned David
> who was in Hawaii closing on a house we’d found together to give him the sad
> news. We were pregnant again a year later. David assured me of his imminent
> divorce and our son was born in May 2007.

The first child would have been ~14/15 now. His son is ~12 and some months and
could very well be reading this site and these comments (FYI).

I got to be honest here, I don't know what Ms. Blakely was thinking at the
time. I don't know her age during the affair, her mental state, or her
upbringing. None of that really matters. What David did, and what he continues
to do to his closest family members, is _wrong_. Apparently, he has been doing
such ghastly things to his family for the last ~15 years.

Compare and contrast this to former CA Gov. Schwarzenegger and his various
children. He had an affair with Mildred "Patty" Baena and hid the affair for
14 years, ending in his divorce from his wife of 25 years. Though his
relationships with the mothers is 'rocky', his relationships with his children
is seemingly better. He recently attended the college graduation (Pepperdine)
of his son with Ms. Baena and posted the event and celebration on social
media.

It is no wonder, then, that Google has become what they started out to _not_
become, namely 'evil'. Such behavious by these childish people (the noun of
'man' cannot be applied to such immature boys) should alert everyone to the
aims of the C-suite at Google: I've got mine, screw you.

~~~
strikelaserclaw
C Suite at google? like these guys are some type of mafia? This happens with
rich, powerful men everywhere world over. I'm reminded of the bill burr bit,
if a lot of women are throwing themselves at you, i wonder how many men would
be able to be faithful.

~~~
Balgair
Fair! But that many C-Suites in many other companies behave like this does not
excuse Google or the behaviour of the other companies.

> I'm reminded of the bill burr bit, if a lot of women are throwing themselves
> at you, i wonder how many men would be able to be faithful.

I'm reminded of the Roman Triumphs of the republican era. Though the
victorious general was paraded through Rome as a god-like figure, faced
painted Jupiterian Red, with a full purple toga, there was often a slave very
publically riding along in the chariot, speaking into the ears of the
Triumphant :"you are mortal" and "look behind". Indeed, Cesar was killed by
the Senate with small knives for being too ostentatious (among many many other
things). Alexander the Great was killed by the smallest of things, a tiny
little bug, likely the plauge (many theories abound though). Lincoln was
killed not by great generals and massed armies, cannons and ships, but by a
crazed and misinformed stage actor with a small Deringer and a single bullet.
Hitler likely died similarly to a small mouse, in a deep and dark hole,
convulsing and foaming at the mouth from eating something very bad.

Though martial infidelity by C-suite a-holes is not nearly the same as the
deaths of famous men (in the case of the article, it is the exact opposite:
birth), the lesson is the same: _Memento Mori_.

------
VladimirIvanov
It is wrong to have a relationship with your direct report. However, I'm
having trouble understanding why she intentionally became pregnant with her
married boss. She was around 37 years old at the time. I also don't understand
why he wanted to make her pregnant and have no involvement with his child. It
all just seems bizarre. He didn't marry her or make any commitment. Clearly
once the child was born from an affair that violates Google's rules she would
have to at least switch departments.

~~~
secabeen
> Clearly once the child was born from an affair that violates Google's rules
> she would have to at least switch departments.

As the employee with more power and rank at the company in question, David
should have been the one to be forced to leave the department. That would have
been the moral thing to do.

~~~
olivierduval
Logically, "As the employee with more power and rank at the company in
question", he's the one giving the most value to the company (or he wouldn't
have promoted, would he?) so - in regard to any company's interest - it's best
to keep him where he give most value than to move him to some other where he
would give less value.

Company's interest is most often not a question a moral, but efficiency.

~~~
secabeen
The question then becomes is there another employee who would step up and give
a similar value if given the opportunity, what is the impact to the
organization of other employees seeing how people were treated in this case,
etc., etc. Judging value to the company by existing power/rank in the company
is certainly the simplest way to do it, but it's not necessarily the best way.

This train of thought has a lot of similarity to the discussions going on
around corporations maximizing only share-holder value, or if it is better for
them to include stakeholders, and other non-stock-price factors when making
decisions.

Rules against nepotism in companies are there to prevent people in a personal
relationship from giving their partner an unfair advantage over other
employees, but also to prevent higher-ups from using their power within the
workplace to victimize their subordinates. In either case, when a pair of
employees clearly and willfully violates the policy to the level of having a
kid together, I think the company should assume that the higher ranking person
is more culpable, and should be punished for their actions, not the other way
around.

------
solipsism
Why do companies always _strongly recommend against_ these kinds of
relationships, instead of outright banning them and having repercussions if
the rules are violated? It seems like it would save so much hassle and effort
to have a zero tolerance policy.

I understand people drink and things happen. I don't really care. Adults
should be expected to exhibit self control.

~~~
purple_ducks
> instead of outright banning them

Come work with us but if you fancy someone then prepare to upend your work
just to see if that relationship is worth pursuing.

I don't think I want any company to dictate what way my love life unfolds.

~~~
solipsism
_Come work with us but if you fancy someone then prepare to upend your work
just to see if that relationship is worth pursuing._

"Fancying" someone doesn't oblige you to pursue a relationship with them any
more than fancying some cake obliges you to eat it.

Are we adults or are we children?

~~~
purple_ducks
> Are we adults or are we children?

After reading your comment, I'm beginning to wonder.

------
swedish_mafia
She claims he didn’t enter a formal child support arrangement till the kid was
4. If true, this is a huge red flag.

Also not very good at his job “Drummond was charged by the Securities and
Exchange Commission in 2005 with causing Google to violate securities law
because he failed to advise the company's board that the company was required
to register $80 million in stock options used as compensation for employees.”

He took home $47m last year.

------
strikelaserclaw
I don't see how it's google's responsibility to babysit people. This guy might
be a complete assh _l_ , but he didn't seem like he coerced anyone, or
harassed them into sleeping with him or having kids with him.

------
gadders
I bet he claims to be a feminist as well.

