
What to do with a screaming baby: the history of handbooks on motherhood - diodorus
https://www.the-tls.co.uk/articles/public/mary-beard-maternity-manuals/
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sundvor
Speaking as a father of a newborn, I feel that parenthood would be more
inclusive.

But hey, I'm used to looking at nappies where "mothers know best" (I will pick
different brand), so this is still well entrenched.

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davegauer
It seems to be one of those double standards that a lot of people are still
okay with for some reason. The one that still gets me is "women having it all"
(children and a career). Why can't this be "parents" instead? We're not all
living in the 1950s anymore.

~~~
gascan
_still okay with for some reason_

Sometimes reality gets in the way of ideals. Men, for example, are pitifully
bad at lactating.

Given initial conditions like that- things quickly fall into the familiar
pattern.

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andrepd
Name one thing, apart from breastfeeding, that men can't do that women can,
when it comes to taking care of a child. Why is it, then, that it's still
"unmanly" to change diapers, or god forbid, even be a stay-at-home dad?

~~~
Retric
Take care of an infant while recovering from birth without taking extra time
of. That's not a huge difference, but it is economically significant for many
couples especially when they have physically demanding jobs.

~~~
watwut
The recovery period after birth is not that long. It can be anything between
few days and two months, but not much more.

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wst_
For some time already there are studies suggesting that infant colic is not
actually a colic but the process of early brain development. In face of this,
looks like there's not much we can do. As much as it is heartbreaking, most
parents and babies just have to walk through it.

[https://journals.lww.com/jpgn/Fulltext/2013/12001/Brain_Matu...](https://journals.lww.com/jpgn/Fulltext/2013/12001/Brain_Maturation,_Early_Sensory_Processing,_and.8.aspx)

~~~
brazzy
"Suggesting"? It's pretty obvious to everyone with half a brain that "colic"
is just a label applied (specifically in the English-speaking world) to a baby
that keeps crying despite all obvious causes of distress being taken care of,
and has nothing whatsoever to do with digestion. I mean, the _official
definition_ is based exclusively on the amount of crying and nothing else, how
could it _possibly_ be a diagnosis of an underlying cause?

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Salamat
Grandmother used to say babies cry because of three things: need for sleep,
need for food, and temreture issues (cold or hot causing colic and gases)

~~~
Moru
Our baby cried because of cow milk protein allergy. The milk protein came from
the mother drinking cow milk and breastfeeding. When we figured that out it
took a few weeks and then she got happier and quiet and could sleep again.
Also the dry spots on the skin vanished.

~~~
dgut
I remember reading a Dutch study where nearly all "child is allergic to milk"
diagnosis by parents turned out to be false. Unfortunately, I can't find the
study.

~~~
cdjk
Here's a counter-example. We accidentally fed formula with cow milk protein in
the middle of the night once after switching to a different formula (it was
the middle of the night, we were sleep deprived, the bottles looked the same
in the dark, and we hadn't purged all the old formula yet). His symptoms
returned immediately for a couple days until it cleared his system.

I know this is anecdata but seeing the immediate change and having a very easy
experiment to test it with if the child is eating formula makes me question
the study.

~~~
jacquesm
He did write 'nearly all'. So there is room for you and the study being
accurate at the same time.

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jimnotgym
The ancients did not know this, but for some reason a trip in the car has
always made my kids sleep. Once you have fed and changed them of course.
Anecdotally formula milk from a bottle seems to help them fill up quicker than
breast feeding, and stay quiet for longer. Although I seem to remember that
may have the bad side effect of increasing the likelyhood of cot-death,
presumably because they are sleeping more deeply and for longer

~~~
jacquesm
Ford is on to that:

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ic6vWoSd8Fk](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ic6vWoSd8Fk)

~~~
TeMPOraL
Wow, I like it. It seems like the approach is, "we have no clue what exactly
is it about cars that works this way, so let's replicate as much of the
experience as possible". Brute-forcing the problem, but sounds like it could
work well.

~~~
jacquesm
A friend of mine (another crazy tinkerer, which is how we got to know each
other) built something like that in the 90's for one of his children that
could not sleep anywhere but in the car. It was a crazy contraption but it did
work.

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polotics
So it says: "some pseudo-science which claimed that the stress of crying would
prevent the proper development of the baby’s brain" ... But cortisol levels
have been tested I believe, and the effects of cortisol are well known.

~~~
dgut
It has become more or less accepted (at least in Scandinavia) that small
children crying is just a form of misbehavior that shouldn't be given any
attention. Coming from South Europe, I found that very strange. But they've
become as good at reading a child's cues as they themselves are at
socializing.

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gerdesj
No idea why this got posted here but I should point out that Mary Beard is
well respected around these parts and is a mother. The TLS is not generally
considered a rag either.

Now, the article itself does start off with a pretty confrontational style. I
humbly suggest you get over it.

