
Half of Millennials say they often feel isolated even when surrounded by friends - paulpauper
https://www.nbcnews.com/health/health-news/despite-social-media-generation-z-millennials-report-feeling-lonely-n980926
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LifeLiverTransp
We jammed a ton of intermediate layers and hacks into social interaction. Of
course they are removed from a natural social habitat. And they will rebel
against it. There will come a generation who completely discards everything
tained by valley tech.

~~~
identity_zero
It's easy to blame tech. I'm someone who is borderline Millenial/Gen Z and I'm
actually finding myself, both internally and externally, through the use of
Twitter. Still very alone at times, think Mr. Robot, but I've actually found
hope through the internet. Strangely enough, I had actually wasted time and
developed maladaptive traits by trying to find myself in the "real" world, as
in the people I was forced to bond with through school and sports.

My take on this is different and many people will disagree. Here it goes. The
"intermediate layers and hacks in social interaction" you speak of isn't
technology but actually our myths of diversity and multi-culturalism. Real
multi-culturalism is really REALLY hard, might be impossible given human
nature. The only diverse thing we can all agree on is ethnic food. The other
is probably college, careers, etc. Everything else is gone. Our culture is
absent of anything internal or metaphysic. Religion and local communities are
gone. Political correctness destroyed art.

I'm happy that some people can thrive in this world and good for them. There's
the other half who pretend to be part of the trend; the ones that feel
isolated. Then there are those like me who are lost in this world. Don't need
pity, I've decided to make my own.

Here's a short video capturing the loneliness of the young today:
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8uuYm7KDm_A](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8uuYm7KDm_A)

Sorry to link to a scrappy 4-Chan esque video but Hollywood isn't exactly
getting the people at the bottom.

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ggm
s/Millennials/People/g -Seriously, although its perhaps stronger in young
people, has this not always been a "thing" and had we a time machine, what
would we find asking this of the same age cohort in times past?

Memory imparts a rosy hue: you can't ask people now about the past and expect
an un-biassed answer.

~~~
SyneRyder
I think I can give an unbiased answer - I remember The Offspring wrote a song
about the same thing back in 1994 (ie pre-modern-internet, pre-smartphone)
called So Alone.

 _" Look at the crowd and tell me whether / All are surrounded / But none are
together / If you're awake, look all around / At all of the people / Still
you're so alone / So alone"_

[https://youtube.com/watch?v=-fFflDhuVuA](https://youtube.com/watch?v=-fFflDhuVuA)

~~~
lapnitnelav
Could it be that this general truth about the difficulty of maintaining close
bonds as we grow older clashes with the myth of social media -which is to be
more connected to people that matter to you?

I think the superficiality of such tools is becoming more and more apparent.
It has become so effortless participate in the social game (for a lack of a
better word) such as wishing an happy birthday or some words of support for
grieving folks that it's getting hard to gauge whether people do actually care
about you. It's about the work you put in.

Personal anecdote: Had to hire a guy with a van on a public holiday as I was
moving to a different part of the city (Dublin). Asked my fellow French
friends for help and sure enough we were loading the van at 11 am. The driver
admitted that he wouldn't have had as much help if he had asked his own
-Irish- friends because they'd be too hangover to bother.

I found that quite sad, especially given that all my friends are not lifelong
friends, we've know each other for 5 years or less.

~~~
nopriorarrests
>we were loading the van at 11 am.

>he wouldn't have had as much help if he had asked his own -Irish- friends
because they'd be too hangover to bother.

6pm might work with irish folks, though.

I mean, I love my friends but moving their furniture at, say, 9am on Saturday
is just... not gonna work.

~~~
lapnitnelav
Nah, at 6 they're back on the piss ;)

We probably got started with the van later than 11 actually, they were around
from 11 to help get stuff out of the flat. But my point still stands.

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joejerryronnie
Several years ago I worked with a young intern who grew up in the suburbs of
the bay area but was going to school in NYC. She said there was nothing in the
world so lonely as being surrounded by thousands of people in a big city. I
think it has to do with our assumption that everyone around us is more
connected than we are.

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amriksohata
Has any study been done on how food and diet changes in the past twenty years
is affecting our minds, the whole gut brain axis?

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adamnemecek
I have a hunch this might be related to the way American friendships work. The
structure of the educational system encourages many weak friendships rather
than a couple strong friendships. This then translates into other life.

Facebook is fundamentally a tool for managing these weak friendships.

I generalize of course.

~~~
delinka
> The structure of the educational system encourages many weak friendships
> rather than a couple strong friendships.

How so? Please elaborate.

~~~
adamnemecek
In Europe, you basically share 8 hours a day for how ever many years with the
same group of 20-30 people.

In the US, every class is with a different group of people and also your
classes change periodically.

