
What if doing your best -- at what you're best at -- isn't enough? - DanLivesHere
http://www.tedquarters.net/2012/03/07/the-lobster-pot/
======
trustfundbaby
This is such a good article in two ways.

First this is an internal dialogue that is a natural offshoot of 'imposter
syndrome'. And for me it actually becomes more frequent as I progress further
in my career as a dev. This is because it becomes more apparent to me how much
I _don't_ know, and I begin to wonder if I'll ever be good enough to attain
the level of expertise that I aspire to.

What makes it more poignant for me is that I've pursued something like this
before (sports career) and didn't quite make it (understatement), and I'm
currently trying to reconcile myself with all the time and effort I invested
in the process and how to ramp down from something that was my overriding
ambition for so long. The good thing is that I've learned a lot of lessons
from the experience and the main takeaway for me was ... if it isn't working,
get out ... life is too short and there are many many other things to try your
hand at.

The second thing that I liked about it was how it shows exactly why we should
have empathy for other developers. I loved this section

 _For every dude I dismiss, every footnote in a roundup post, every guy deemed
worthy of mere shrugs or raised eyebrows — all of whom are well-compensated
for their work, no doubt — there is someone far away on the other end of the
phone coaching him or advising him or loving him who wants desperately for him
to succeed and be happy_

because one of the things I try to live by is this

 _Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle --- Plato_

I've had endured a few insults in my life as a dev ("You'll never be an
engineer son, maybe a scripter or something, but never an engineer"), by
people who thought I'd never make it as a programmer. Many years, later, here
I am ... doing a pretty decent job at it, and I'll never forget all the kind
people who encouraged me, took a time out to explain something to me ...
again, just like I'll never forget the couple of times someone was a complete
dick to me, because they thought I had no prospects as a developer.

I guess what I'm saying is, whenever you feel the need to dismiss someone who
has no skills ... maybe take a step back and see if what they need is
encouragement, coaching and a little bit of direction instead.

~~~
dclowd9901
Speaking as someone who started literally from 0 in terms of developer
knowledge a scant 3 years ago, and having been spat on, insulted and otherwise
ridiculed for ever believing I could join the cult, I will say this: What
doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

I had code with security holes that you could drive a Mack truck through. I
learned security. I had sloppy copypasta code. I learned OOP. I had
inefficient code. I learned memory management processes and how to structure
code better for efficiency.

Could those who spoke down to me have been more helpful? More coddling? Not
said anything at all? Sure. But who knows how that would have stunted my
growth.

It's good to have compassion, and it's good to care. But if you really want to
be the best at something, you're going to have to want it. And if you really
want it, when someone beats you down, you're not going to stay down. You're
gonna learn how to hit back.

As far as ultimately being where you want to be, sometimes it's simply the
luck of the draw, and you have to understand how large a role that luck plays,
as well, especially when you're being enchanted by stories of multi-million
dollar startup investments.

~~~
huggyface
_I will say this: What doesn't kill you makes you stronger._

This saying has always bothered me, Nietzsche or not.

What doesn't kill you, in the literal sense, can often cripple, maim, or
psychologically impair you. It could make you hesitant, lose confidence, or
refuse to try again.

Whether it's your life, or your professional career, the "failure or luck
against adversity makes you stronger" bit seldom matches reality.

Sorry to take that sidetrack, but it happens to be a saying that I wish would
disappear.

~~~
dclowd9901
Agreed, it's trite, overused, and arguably obsolete phrasing. My point was
more that we often face large degrees of adversity early on when we approach a
difficult challenge. If we get up and walk away after we're knocked down in
the beginning, we probably didn't want it that badly to begin with.

------
vco
Analogy to startups: \- Filter out all the background noise just like athletes
filter out the media. Stop caring about what [insert tech blog here] just
posted about your competition, who got what funding, who's presenting at
Disrupt. Focus on yourself - the rest is just fluff.

Analogy to personal development: \- If you love what you do and your best
isn't cutting it at your role then consider a minor pivot. The best basketball
and football coaches at the professional level are usually not the best
players and yet they managed to find a role that leverages their love for the
game while pivoting away from their physical disadvantages.

~~~
matwood
_The best basketball and football coaches at the professional level are
usually not the best players and yet they managed to find a role that
leverages their love for the game while pivoting away from their physical
disadvantages._

Even players themselves can be in systems that don't work for them and they
may not seem like good players until they get into a system that fits them.
Minor pivots are a good thing and should be tried.

------
barrkel
Doing what you're best at in a field with limited places for the best - like
baseball - may set you up for failure.

There's a relevant concept in economics called comparative advantage -
<http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Comparative_advantage>. Even if you are not the
best at _anything_ , there are some things that are "enough" - that create
surplus.

~~~
xanados
Another important economic concept that bears on this issue is "positional
goods." Baseball abilities are positional goods because the value is almost
all in being the best or among the best, and any other level of ability has no
value to society. This is not the same as, for example logging. Half the
ability in logging is half as useful economically.

------
supercanuck
>Worrying about the above-listed peculiarities of playing the sport
professionally and actually playing it professionally are likely, in many
cases, mutually exclusive.

There is a fantastic book called, "The Inner Game of Tennis" that helps
describe that the ability to reach your max potential is to silence the self-
criticizing ego and essentially just do it by seeing and feeling.

Anecdotal? Sure Interesting? Absolutely.

~~~
sp332
If you can find the video of the author, Timothy Gallwey, teaching a middle-
aged out of shape lady in a muumuu to play tennis in one hour, it's really
inspiring.

~~~
BHSPitMonkey
Here: <http://vimeo.com/6152948>

~~~
felixd
Video was worth watching.

------
snowwrestler
Just because someone is doing something, it doesn't mean that is what they are
best at. Maybe this particular baseball player would be much better at being a
lawyer. But he wants to play baseball--so there he is, struggling in Florida.

How does one know what they are best at, anyway? I try to be reflective, and I
ask people whom I trust what they think. Often the answers don't agree, or
they reflect the subjectivity of each relationship (e.g. my lawyer telling me
I'd be a good lawyer--but how would he know if I'd be a better cook?).
Sometimes they are things that I actually don't like doing. So where does that
leave me?

------
AznHisoka
I guess that's why baseball players are encouraged to remain even-keeled, and
not be stuck in a high, or low. Just focus on execution, and forget about the
drama, and mental noise.

------
stupandaus
If you're doing your best at what you're best at, but in a field that gives
you no pleasure, will success even be enough?

Doubtful.

------
helen842000
What about doing your best at something you're terrible at? Sometimes no
matter how hard you try, you still make a little impact in a big industry.

If you got into your field of expertise with ease, find it lacking in
challenges. with little impact, maybe it's time to try your best at something
new & difficult and therefore perhaps more rewarding.

Even moving into a field with a wider scope, something critical that benefits
others greatly. Success and job satisfaction can be found in many places other
than 'being the best' or being in an enviable position.

~~~
DanLivesHere
NB that the article is not about "doing your best" but about "doing what you
are best at doing."

------
drpgq
Baseball must be especially tough for players, considering it is mostly just
individual contests over and over, pitcher versus batter. On team sports like
basketball or hockey you can always rationalize that the rest of your team
should have done more.

~~~
ams6110
What?? The pitcher in particular absolutely depends on the rest of his
defense.

Batters depend on those behind them to move them around.

I think golf or tennis would be a better analogy for your point.

------
pao
It's like a less tongue-in-cheek version of the despair.com poster:
<http://www.despair.com/fail24x30pri.html>

------
silentscope
Why would you even consider this question? I know why you would, but on a
deeper level, spending time on this is not healthy or constructive.

Maybe you can't ever be at your best. Maybe you'll always improve, no matter
how long you train. Idealistic? You bet your ass. It's taken me further in
life than I ever thought possible--and it will continue to carry me.

Don't forget: they don't know who you are. You don't know fully who you are.

------
pavel_lishin
I'm getting a 403 response.

~~~
i_cannot_hack
Here's a mirror: <http://i.imgur.com/gZ4xB.jpg>

(well, it's more a simple screenshot of the page rather than a mirror, but you
get the idea)

------
jkuria
good writing for sure but so much set up for so little insight? I you're gonna
do that you might as well just get to the point!

------
squadron
Go blue ocean. If you're being true to your vision and individuality, it will
always be good enough.

P.S. I'd like to qualify "good enough". I've poured blood, sweat, tears and
spit into ideas that ended up being completely ignored by the world. I still
consider them good enough though. I am still proud of what I accomplished.

You are the ultimate decider of what is good enough.

~~~
endersshadow
What blue ocean would you suggest a baseball player enter, pray tell?

~~~
squadron
I was simply responding to the title. I didn't read the blog post (misread it
as an Ask HN).

Slap my wrist accordingly.

