

It's not you, it's your books - kradic
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/03/30/books/review/Donadio-t.html?ex=1364529600&en=f7845965692c506e&ei=5090&partner=rssuserland&emc=rss&pagewanted=all

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acangiano
Here's the problem. You are considered ignorant if you don't know anything
about Pushkin. But it's perfectly normal or accepted to ignore who Enrico
Fermi, Alan Turing or Paul Erdős were. We're all ignorant about something but,
in society, literary ignorance is frowned upon much more than scientific
ignorance.

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mixmax
I noticed that too - I had absolutely no idea who pushkin was until I asked
wikipedia. I do, however, know all the people you mention, and why they are
known.

People are just different, and so is their taste in books. The idea of finding
partners based on book preferences is interesting though. I would love a
dating site where I could search for women based on their reading habits. I
mean if I could search for women that liked Neal Stephenson or Bob Woodward I
would be thrilled.

So could someone here please make it? Please...

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pg
We'd definitely consider funding it.

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mixmax
With that disclosure you can probably be expecting a few applications for the
idea :-)

And I'd love to use it if somebody gets it right.

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rms
Yeah... no reason to stop at books either, you could also do music/movies, all
forms of media really.

~~~
johnb
although, to go back to high fidelity - the big discovery is that it's not
what you like, but what you're like that makes a relationship workable

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Alex3917
I feel vaguely guilty when I read fiction, as if I'm wasting my time playing
videogames or watching TV. It's gotten to the point where I can't really enjoy
novels anymore. I still occasionally read trashy non-fiction though; today
I've been reading To Cork Or Not To Cork by George Taber. I wonder what this
says about my future relationship prospects.

~~~
xlnt
Just because some TV, video games, novels, etc, are not worthwhile doesn't
mean you should be averse to rich media in general. The format is good, and
good things can be put in it.

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ken
I think he's not so much concerned about the medium (or even content) as he is
the read-only-ness of it. We do hold authors in much higher regard.

But this brings up another question: why does there seem to be this general
obsession with the consumption of this particular medium? I would say they're
in love with the form, but they don't mention doing any writing. I would say
they're in love with great art, but they don't mention any other forms. (Is it
a NYC thing? Manhattan always seems downright foreign to me.)

Imagine asking the people quoted in this NYT article about the last manga
they've read or the last modern symphony they heard or the last painting they
made.

~~~
asdflkj
It's the same reason we aren't showing each other pictures or playing each
other music right now. Written word is the best way to convey almost all kinds
of complex information. If you have the time, that is.

~~~
xlnt
i think video and pictures are useful for a lot of information (less than
writing, but a lot). but in general they are more expensive to do well. but
examples include charts, maps, and graphs, and also pictures of scenes usually
work better than describing what it looks like in English.

~~~
asdflkj
I said "complex information". This is vague, but you can see the truth of this
in a following way: take any topic, such as maps, which you mentioned. What's
more complex, a map, or knowing how to make a map? The former will be a
picture, but the latter will be mostly text. As far as I can tell, this is the
rule. As you go up in complexity, text becomes more and more suitable.

By the way, I mostly agree that books are overrated. The reason is that most
books are not very complex. Text is the wrong medium for the ideas of their
authors.

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martythemaniak
Heh, I actually an "Atlas Shrugged" experience - I knew a pretty girl and
after adding her on facebook I noticed the book was at the top of her
favourites. That really did change the way I thought of her.

But more generally, I can't make my mind up one way or another about this.
I've seen the kind of relationship the last part of the article talks about -
very long term, very stable with interests like books, movies, music etc being
completely irrelevant - so that makes me think its quite right. At the same
time, there's gotta be some baseline - how can a music lover go out with
someone that thinks highly of (say) Paris Hilton's music? Or a normal person
with a objectivist? ;)

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SteveC
I'm always suspicious of adults who list Harry Potter as their favourite book.

~~~
mtts
Agreed.

Adults who list Harry Potter as their favorite book (which is not the same as
admitting Harry Potter is a fun read) by doing so fairly explicitly state that
the universe of a children's book, however well written it is, is pretty much
all the intellectual stimulation they care for.

Nothing wrong with them, most likely, but certainly not people I'd want to
invest emotionally in. YMMV, of course.

~~~
Tichy
By that logic, listing any book as a favorite would mean that you have a
limited intellectual horizon, after all, you only care for the intellectual
stimulation provided by that book.

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amohr
I admit it. I read the Character of Physical Law just to pick up chicks.

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mynameishere
Music is considerably more important than books, since it's typically hard to
avoid the other person's taste, good or bad. "Urban contemporary", "country"
music, and anything involving death grunts can cause problems.

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prakash
Reminds of me Joel Spolsky's quote, to which I agree with to some degree.

 _"You can learn a lot about somebody by the books they've read. And I've
always thought that if you read all the same books I read, you'll come to
think like me, too."_

<http://www.joelonsoftware.com/navLinks/fog0000000262.html>

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nazgulnarsil
My girlfriend loved Harry Potter when we first met but I've since turned her
on to much higher quality stuff (fantasy and otherwise) and she seems to be
responding well. At least she doesn't have any literary pretensions like some
girl who prides herself on having read pushkin probably does.

If you pride yourself on having rad certain authors you're reading them for
the wrong reasons. You don't read great literature because it's "Great
Literature". You read it because it is good.

I suppose it's to be expected. Even in the intellectual world Sturgeon's Law
applies. 90% of everything is crap.

(Btw, if you havn't you should read Theodore Sturgeon's More Than Human)

------
bgutierrez
I once dated a girl who said to me: "Barnes and Noble? What's that?" and "I've
only read two books in my life."

But she was the one that broke it off.

Now I'm marrying someone that I worked with in a bookstore.

~~~
kirubakaran
Congrats!

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jacabado
I've learnt this lesson the hard way. Now my favorite book in social networks
is "Why Most Things Fail" by Paul Omerod.

I'll recommend it to everyone, but specially to those with some interest, and
little knowledge, in Economics.

~~~
GavinB
If he renamed it "Why Most Things Fail -- and 10 Easy Things You Can Do To
Avoid It Happening to YOU," it would be on the front page of every social
media site . . .

I need to read less about copywriting.

------
iowahansen
I read Hacker News. Does that mean I can only date geek chicks? What if there
aren't any?

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Tichy
submarine alarm

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ced
Where?

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Tichy
<http://paulgraham.com/submarine.html>

At least a reasonably interesting discussion ensued on HN. But other than
that, I don't think those books are as big an issue in dating as the article
tries to make them to be. Hm, except perhaps if you happen to be a "bookslut"?
Impressive how they even manage to tailor the article towards the intended
audience of their client (I presume).

~~~
ced
I knew what he was talking about. The article just strikes me as uninspired
rather than promotional.

