
Ask HN: What keeps you going? - zeequreshi
How does one deal with apathy like feelings?
======
muzani
Csikszentmihalyi has searched for the key to happiness. His research was not
so much what makes people happy but when they are happy. The results - flow.

This graph hosted on Wikipedia might explain it:
[https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/f/f6/Ch...](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/f/f6/Challenge_vs_skill.svg/300px-
Challenge_vs_skill.svg.png)

As you can see, apathy is on the bottom left. It's what happens when you're
facing low skill, unchallenging work.

Ideally, you want to be in the flow sector. Or at least in control/arousal
sectors.

The easiest step would be a little self training. Even if your job is just
refactoring, learn to refactor better from sites like
[https://refactoring.guru/](https://refactoring.guru/) or learn to type
faster, use more shortcuts, master your IDE. If you're doing something like
Wordpress, you can learn to deal with servers better. If you're a project
manager, there are plenty of tools and techniques to pick up.

This should at least push you from apathy to relaxation or control.

The other path is vertical, which is to take on harder work. Learn a new
framework and use it. Take a job outside your comfort zone. Work on a
challenging side project.

Most of my work puts me in the anxiety zone, which makes me procrastinate a
lot and is not ideal. But it's still better than apathy.

It is a more painful path, but it also tends to pay much better.

~~~
arduinomancer
I don’t get why the bottom right would be “relaxation”. Wouldn’t that more
likely be “super boredom”?

~~~
muzani
It's like gaming. Something like Candy Crush or Angry Birds. It requires a
level of skill, but is not very challenging.

------
tjkrusinski
Realizing that everyone else feels the same thing and we all have the same
things.

We all are subject to time. We all are subject to the strengths and weaknesses
of our minds. We all are a bit nervous about this or that.

If I act out of fear, I will hit a wall. If I am honest and say that I don't
know, that I am not sure if this is going to work, that I don't think I'm able
to do this, I'll be better off.

Being strong isn't too dissimilar from being bold. Being bold can mean not
being afraid of showing my shortcomings. Showing my shortcomings means
admitting my weaknesses. By showing my weaknesses I am being strong. Do this
day after day and see that things are generally going in the right direction,
maybe a little slower than I expected, but things aren't linear, time is.

I can control the outcome in so much as I can control myself. It'll happen if
I do it. It won't if I don't. That could mean project managing the fuck out of
something, it doesn't have to mean actually doing it.

If I motivate someone else to do it, then that was something I did. I did
something to get them to do something.

What if I can't motivate myself? Well, I can't muster some things out of thin
air. I need to fill the soul. I talk to someone else, do something else,
change perspectives, or I push. I just push.

Action yields motivation. The more that I have, the more capacity I have to
act, the more I'll be motivated to do more.

My family, my wife, what I've been given, is why I push myself to learn that
thing or do that thing.

Idk, kinda stream of consciousness but generally, the thought that I am more
well off _because_ of the millions of people that came before me, and by doing
and acting, I can make the billions after me more well off in a small way. I
like that thought.

------
thiago_fm
Responsibilities and how my life has improved so far(lived far less than <$1 a
day and now got a decent job in a first world country), raw effort pays off.

I need to take care of my wife and of my dog. Also, my family and peers have
invested a lot of time and effort in getting myself educated, manners etc. I
don't want to let anybody down and make sure that whoever had some good effect
on me will at least be proud of helping me out into that.

------
java_script
Lining the pockets of the investors that own my labor is a reward in and of
itself.

E: Just thought of a cool startup idea. Every day you and your coworkers can
calculate (it might take some guesstimating) the surplus value you create and
try to beat each other on a leaderboard. I'm imagining a possible JIRA
integration.

------
ishjoh
When I'm feeling apathetic it's a sign for me that I've gotten too comfortable
and I need to have some sort of adventure or new responsibilities that push me
out of my comfort zone.

If you are feeling apathetic try something new, even if your apathy is telling
you it's a waste of time, just go for it, you might be pleasantly surprised.
Even if the new thing doesn't pan out, at least it frees you up to move onto
something else.

------
e9
[https://positivedisintegration.com/Webb2008.pdf](https://positivedisintegration.com/Webb2008.pdf)

------
bemmu
Curiosity about what will happen next, both in my life and with the world in
general.

~~~
zeequreshi
I felt this way. But I outlived that curiosity at some point. The concept of
cause & effect became invalid.

Two major realisations were the final blow before I hit the abyss of it all.

1\. Every action of mine was intended towards self improvement 2\. Each of
those actions was/is/will be futile

I want to go back to that phase when I was waking up curious about what will
happen next. But I'm not able to keep living the lie anymore.

~~~
TheSpiceIsLife
I went through something similar, except that, after a time, rather than
wanting to go back to it I feel liberated from it.

------
quickthrower2
Routine & family :)

------
mortivore
coffee and water

