

How do you choose between job and family? - chrisyeh
http://chrisyeh.blogspot.com/2011/02/how-do-you-choose-between-job-and.html

======
a5seo
> In theory, shouldn’t I find a nice cushy corporate job?

... where your outcomes are determined by currying political favor,
gamesmanship, and your boss's shifty whims. Yeah, that's not a recipe for
relaxing if you ask me. I'd also like my kids to view me as someone of
integrity and not some sycophantic corporate douche.

~~~
eitally
You're choosing the wrong corps....

~~~
a5seo
Most companies operate on the same ridiculous performance review process that
puts the judgement of your value to the organization into the hands of one
person, your boss. OR they try to use objective goals that are obsolete as
soon as the ink dries, so you spend your time either hitting irrelevant goals
or managing up so you can work on the right things. It sucks. It's toxic.

It makes you a less-whole person and that makes you less-good as a parent.

------
yogsototh
Not making what you like should have a negative effect on your self esteem and
therefore on your family.

There is no simple answer.

I personally began to choose work and I wasn't so happy with it. Then I choose
my family and I feel better. But you have to consider I had the chance my
corporate job didn't pressure me too much.

Furthermore my wife work at Hospital in a field where, last month, she saw
four children die. It is something that make you think about priorities. And
clearly, now family is my first priority. But I also don't forget my feeling
have direct consequences on the happiness of my family.

------
wazoox
> _In theory, shouldn’t I find a nice cushy corporate job? I’m good at getting
> along with people, so I could probably nestle into the underbelly of a big
> corporation and make a ton of money without having to exert myself too
> much._

Wrong, wrong. You'll control much more your time if you're on your own. In a
corporate environment, lots of people will pressure you. All by yourself, you
just need to have the balls to not work more then 28 hours a week or whatever
limit you want to set.

~~~
BenSS
That's not a good answer either. You've got no backup, so often it's even less
flexible and easier to suddenly devote huge amounts of time to make it work
and keep your family fed. Fear is a big motivator.

"It depends" is the best answer unfortunately, neither is panacea. Corporate
culture, the success (or not) of your own business, where you are, what your
SO does, healthcare, etc..

~~~
thwarted
You don't necessarily have a "backup" at a corporate job either. Anyone could
lose their job at any time at a corporate job. One might actually be better
off by having experience with being self-reliant.

~~~
BenSS
I meant backup as in having someone else available to do the work when you're
on vacation, sick, etc. You don't have that solo. You're right that it might
be better, but as I stated - depends on many factors.

------
JoeAltmaier
Prioritize: 1) Health 2) Family's health 3) Marriage 4) Reputation 5)
Education 6) House 7) Savings 8) Job

That doesn't mean there is nothing left for the job. Just don't fool yourself
into thinking you can support one of these when anything more important is
threatened.

------
rmah
Simple, I choose job.

