

Hacker News, You influenced me to start consulting. Now tear apart my website - martynasb
http://www.torocket.com/

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hsrob1
I'm guessing English is not your first language. The site is littered with
dozens of grammatical errors.

"Your website is like a leaking hole. And it's leaking customers with bunches
of money." \- awkward.

..."we will make your website 'money printing machine' for your business." \-
_a_ money printing machine

"And this is what you will get: more revenue and more customers." \- awkward

"Less then 3% users buy your product." Less THAN 3% OF users...

"Why other 97% don't by from you?" Why DON'T THE other 97% BUY from you?

"Research is primary thing we do for our clients." -too simplistic.

"And we do this to confidently understand you." \- this is a strange
transition, and an awkward sentence.

"every solution we apply to your Online Business is because data showed us to
do that. " \- very awkward

"Every Action of them" \- what?

"There is going to be a lot of complex information collected, but we will
process it and make it visual and clear. Not only we will benefit from this
intelligent data - you too will, comfortably sitting in the chair, see how is
your business functioning anytime and anywhere." \- rewrite this entire
paragraph, it's a mess.

The "Survey & Feedback" box is a complete disaster, so I'll just put the worst
of it here... rewrite the whole thing:

"We will setup infrastructure for communicating with any person visiting your
website." \- awkward

"Why the customer haven't bought anything and left?" \- ??? Find out why
customers left without making a purchase.

"Before, you just haven't knew, but now when you are working with us, it's not
an answer anymore." \- I... don't even know, I think you mean it's not a
question anymore? And "just haven't knew" should be something like 'you had no
idea'... but the whole sentence here is... not good.

"If he leaves - we will know why. If he buys something - good - but we still
need to know why." Don't use gender-specific pronouns.

"Because those decisions determines if you will get CC number or not." \- not
only is this incorrect on several levels English-wise, but that's really not
how you want to refer to "closing a sale." The way it's written sounds more
like you're skimming credit card numbers for fraudulent purposes

To be continued...

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JoeAltmaier
Guessing Russian? I don't think there are articles (a, the) commonly used
there, which would explain their absence throughout.

~~~
martynasb
Lithuanian. But no, we don't have them.

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davismwfl
Other than the grammatical errors others have pointed out it has some
responsive issues (viewing it on my Android phone).

Especially around the "How to Solve" section where the text overlaps and goes
outside of the bounding box etc. It is mostly still legible, but with so much
traffic being mobile I'd work to fix those issues as they are low hanging
fruit fixes.

Also, I wouldn't have links that just always go to the contact page. Just
remove the links until you have content or create the content. Specifically
your about us section in the footer. I personally wouldn't even fill out your
contact form to ask for details without knowing something about who you are,
what you have done that makes your opinion something I should listen to.

~~~
martynasb
Thanks. Responsive problem is probably because I use special jquery lib to
align column sizes.

It's difficult to make testimonial part, because, at the beginning, it's
chicken and egg problem. But definitely it must be solved.

P.S. HN drops me "you are submitting too fast.."

~~~
joshvm
Don't worry about not having testimonials to start with, but give your
customers a face and a story they can emphasise with. Tell them why you
started the company and what you've done in your previous jobs. At the very
least have a bio that says "Hi, I'm X and these are my qualifications".

~~~
martynasb
Thanks for the advice. You are absolutely right, at least this I can do. There
is lack of 'real person' now. I will tell my story. And the next important
step will be to justify my words not only with testimonials, but also with
stories and case studies of successful results.

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StephenGL
Not bad. Like the look. Some of your wording and errors makes it look like
English is not your native language? Which is fine, but fix it either way. The
bottom section is too casual. "If you would ask me". I'm on your site. I am
asking you. Just tell me.

~~~
martynasb
Glad to hear you like it :) Yep my native language is Lithuanian. I still
improving my English.

Anyway there is going to be lot of changes. The general feel and look now is
relevant for me.

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joshvm
The content there is generally OK, but it could do with polish. Quite a lot of
grammar/spelling issues, I would read over the page from "Your website is
loosing money" (losing).

It could do with a testimonial/portfolio area. At the moment I can't find
anything about what you've actually done, either as a company or a founders'
bio. If I'm paying you money to rejuvenate my site I'd like to know a bit more
about your credentials.

All the links in the footer link to contact/blog.

Hopefully that's some honest criticism, great job for getting the something
online! :)

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petercooper
"Error establishing a database connection"

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martynasb
Thanks. Fixed.

Wordpress eats resources really fast :)

