
The biggest mistakes people make when choosing a life partner - SonicSoul
http://qz.com/474766/the-biggest-mistakes-people-make-when-choosing-a-life-partner/
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mcv
The article claims that the one big determining factor for a successful
relationship is The Other Person. This is of course nonsense. Yes, the other
person is one of the two big factors. The other is you. The article treats
people as passive, unchanging objects, but that isn't true. You can work to
make a relationship work. In fact, you _have_ to work to make it work.

I'm convinced that there's no such thing as a magical combination of two
people resulting in a perfect, no fuss, maintenance-free relationship. And I
think it's possible to make any relationship with a random stranger work as
long as both people are willing to work at it and trust each other.

I remember a quote from someone from a culture of arranged marriages: "You
marry the one you love, we love the one we marry." Many (though not all) of
those relationships work fine.

So don't just look at the other. Also look at yourself, what you bring to the
relationship, and what you expect, and talk with each other about that.

