
Ask HN: Mentors for Engineering Managers - russianator
Where have others found, in person or online a mentor or mentors specifically for your role as an engineering manager?
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playing_colours
I did not have explicit mentorship relations, but at some point I learnt to
identify at jobs people I wanted to pick wisdom from. Then either watched them
closely or talked to them: chief architect with pragmatic engineering
reasoning, a CTO who helped me to understand how product and sales people
think, their worries, and how to speak their language, etc.

When experienced people see you are eager to learn, open to listening and act
on advice, they will share.

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jressey
I have managed in the past and here are some things that worked for me:

\- Ask the technology leaders at your company/past companies about the
managers they used to work with and see if they can connect you.

\- Go on LinkedIn and message all of the managers from local companies you
respect.

\- Do some mentoring yourself, you may meet a junior engineer with an awesome
boss, and they may be willing to introduce you.

\- This is outside the box: have 1-1s with random managers in different parts
of your company. You'll be surprised how similar the roles and challenges are.

When you get a chance to meet, make it as easy on the mentor as possible. Go
to them, pick the restaurant, etc. Don't try to get them to help you solve
your problems, they won't know how. Just ask them about their world.

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mersenne
Try Plato ([http://www.platohq.com](http://www.platohq.com)). I used it for a
few months and really liked it. It's a bit pricey, though, but if you find the
right mentors it could be super valuable.

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hkarthik
I benefited greatly from my EM mentor, who was a senior manager at my last
company. Our meeting was arranged as part of an internal mentor match up, and
then we just continued it over nearly 4 years of working there. I think we
were the longest running mentor/mentee arrangement from that first match up!

I attribute my success largely to his support. He leaned into the mentorship
by meeting with me weekly initially, and then bi-weekly as our schedules got
tighter (we both got promoted to manage larger and larger teams). He was
always extremely generous with his time, and always helped me sort out sticky
situations and gave me direct feedback.

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mdinic
What area specifically do you need mentoring in? Is it more structural stuff
like meeting organization and expectation management or soft skills like
leadership and strategy?

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AaronNewcomer
I have been thinking about joining
[https://www.platohq.com/](https://www.platohq.com/) which is specifically
what you are looking for.

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40something
Let’s keep it real, unless you’re a 20 something relatively attractive female,
nobody is going to “mentor” you worth a damn.

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mdinic
I don't see how this is true, especially in engineering? My experience is that
there is rarely a formal mentoring relationship but mentoring happens all the
time.

