
How do you balance having a gf with running a business? - Apane
Gf&#x27;s take up a lot of time and often money, so how do you folks balance it? Please share.
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pw
It's a choice. You can choose to spend time with someone you love and
hopefully want to spend the rest of your life with or you can choose to spend
time on your business. Think carefully about this decision. One will leave you
with someone to hold your hand on your deathbed, with countless beautiful
memories and, heck, maybe even children. The other, if you're lucky, will
leave you with buckets and buckets of money. One of these sets of things is
more important than the other. Hopefully you still know which is which.

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CyberFonic
I recall reading an article (was linked from HN some time back) about people
nearing the end of their lives. Nobody wished they had spent more time at
work.

Startup culture focuses too much on money and fails to look at the many
beautiful, important things that money cannot buy.

Contrary to the aphorism; he who dies with the most toys / money didn't win.
He missed out on living a life to the fullest potential.

~~~
pw
Totally agree about startup culture.

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adventured
Most of the time you don't. It's a cliche - but true - that trying to do a
startup or run a time intensive business, is a relationship killer.

The money side of it, if it's someone that is really in to you, is not a big
deal compared to the time.

You only get to choose to invest in to a few things time wise, when you're
doing a startup. You can watch TV, or exercise. You can play video games, or
eat healthier by cooking every meal. You get the idea. In my opinion, the best
way to keep a gf during this time, is to abandon anything else that is worth
less to you in life than her (except the critical stuff like health related
items).

Don't watch tv, watch movies, or play games, unless it's with her. If you can,
work out with her; cook, with her. Do the startup, and spend time with her,
and that's your life.

Otherwise, until things settle down, don't date unless you're ok with casual
dating or dealing with upset girlfriends.

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CyberFonic
I think you meant to write ___needy_ __GFs take up a lot of time and money.

If you are consistently working more than 60 hours/week, then maybe you need
to learn to delegate. Working 100 hrs/week only leads to burn out. With or
without a GF you will suffer health problems. So having GF with whom to share
non-working time and "exercise" (ahem) is good for you. If you don't feel
invigorated after spending a couple of hours with her, then maybe it's an
inter-personal dynamic issue - time to move on.

In my experience there are many entrepreneurial / career-oriented women out
there who work hard and play hard. Believe it or not, they often complain they
can't find men who can understand them ... so there's your chance.

As for the money. You probably don't choose to be a sugar daddy - so stop
dating gold diggers.

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saturngirl
Get/Keep your girl involved in your business.

Your girl might view your business as something to compete with for your time
because she sees it as an unknown black box. The way to fix this is to talk to
her about your business (and your goals). The more she knows about what you
do, the more likely she will understand why your business needs your time.

(I am assuming that you are in a serious relationship with your gf. If you are
not there yet, then it is best not to mix your business & personal
relationships)

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joeclark77
Marry her!

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MichaelCrawford
In any relationship, it's important to set limits. If you don't, if you permit
others to transgress your boundaries, you are likely to become the victim of
domestic abuse.

In my particular case, I wish now that I'd put a lock on the door of my
office. My now ex-wife was heavily into how I should make my cables somehow go
away. She felt they were ugly. I regarded this as hurtful, I always wanted to
point out to her that "My computer cables make my computers go. Without them I
would be unemployed."

HOWEVER!

It is also important not to let your work run your life. That was another
mistake I made; to the extent you possibly can, make time for her every single
day. Take the weekends off.

Given the way things ultimately turned out, I regard it as being for the best
that we are divorced. But there are many ways that things did not have to turn
out that way.

To the extent that we worked together towards a common purpose, we got along
really, really well. I did not realize that, not in a conscious way, until
just recently.

