

Okay. So what are you going to do about it? - khingebjerg
http://www.sebastianmarshall.com/?p=387

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patio11
If only there were a cheap, easy way to automatically send appointment
reminders in Mandarin. ;)

(Sadly, HIPAA -- American health privacy legislation -- means that there is a
lot of uncertainty about whether they can actually _use_ it or not, and since
I'm not a lawyer and don't have an extra $100k lying around I can't resolve
that ambiguity at the moment.)

~~~
jonknee
AFAIK you're good to go as long as you don't reveal any patient information
(called PHI in the HIPAA world). So instead of leaving a message like,
"Calling to confirm John Doe's appointment at Johnson Health Institute" it
would need to be "Calling to confirm an appointment at Johnson Health
Institute". That way if the number is incorrect for some reason there hasn't
been a breach of privacy.

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raintrees
Unless I am listening to my wife. Usually, she doesn't want solutions from me,
just an ear :)

That, and no more lists...

~~~
gfodor
Arguably this is more sound advice than the one in the article. More often
than not (particularly in relationships) complaining is a toll on the road to
getting over it, whatever it is.

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vsync
Great post. This is similar to the idea of a site my friend and I put together
called Lessons Learned (<http://lessonslearnedby.us/>).

We've only just started coding on it again after focusing on ramping up
another more easily monetizable project with investor interest, but even in
its simplest form we found that it makes a huge difference when walking away
from a situation to say not just "well that rocked/sucked" or even "won't do
that again" but to ask ourselves "what lesson can I learn from this?"

It seems being mindful and asking the right questions, consistently, pays
immense dividends.

I'm adding this question to my list. One could even say I've "learned" a
"lesson" :)

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edw519
This is exactly what happened to me 2 days ago at my haircut. My barber and I
enjoy talking about the Pittsburgh Steelers (American football). Somehow, our
discussion turned into my nonstop complaining...

"I hate when they run up the middle on first down!"

"The referees call too many penalties!"

"The kicker should go back to bagging groceries!"

"The announcers don't understand the game!"

"Instant replay ruins the experience!"

"They should just pounce on fumbles instead of trying to pick them up and run
with them!"

Finally, he said, "Well then, what are you going to do about it?"

I answered the only way I could, "I'm going to drink more beer and yell louder
at the TV. Maybe, just maybe, someone will hear me and do what I say."

~~~
DanielBMarkham
Yelling at the TV is a long-established American tradition. :)

Sebastian's got a great article here -- he's really been on a roll lately. The
only thing I'd add is that sometimes you can't do anything. When I read that
book on stoicism last month, one of the key points was that you need to sort
out the things you can change, the things you can't, and the things you have
some bit of leverage with. Ignore the things you can't change, act on the ones
you can.

The ones in the middle -- the things you can change but only a little bit --
you internalize, separating the parts that you own and the parts you don't.
For instance, you can't make yourself win a sports match. But you _can_ make
sure you play the game as absolutely the best as possible.

This is such a simple observation -- almost stupidly simple -- yet we keep
getting the three categories mixed up, worrying about stuff we can't change,
and giving up on things we can.

~~~
alex_c
<http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serenity_Prayer>

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jharrison
What do you do when the answer is, "Nothing"? I find myself in situations that
I really really want to change but can't come to a solution that I feel will
work for everyone involved (family). My solution is basically to delay action
and tell myself that THAT is my solution, for now. One of the comments in the
post was to "change your mind". Maybe that's what I'm doing.

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jonknee
I have come across this in my city--lots of people complaining and fewer
people changing things (almost all of whom are quieter than the complainers).
The easiest thing to do is complain and it's very rarely helpful. The reason
why things aren't optimal (for you) isn't because no one has had the
opportunity to complain.

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ig1
While I agree with the sentiments behind this post, complaining is often used
as a way of venting frustrations that you can't do something about (trivially
anyway).

It helps people feel less frustrated if they can complain about it.

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jeberle
A former boss of mine had a simple rule: you can't complain unless you can
suggest an alternative. It was a great source of ideas.

