

On Depression - gsibble
http://onepercentbreadsticks.com/i-am-ill

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Eleopteryx
What I don't understand is society's strong aversion to the notion of suicide.
Simply stating that I want to opt out of the bullshit I have to endure by
being alive on this rock can get me locked up, and has in the past. Which
actually just guaranteed no one would see it coming if I were ever serious
about it.

Even when I am in a good mood, I just fail to see such a decision as
irrational -- which is what society and modern psychiatry wants to convince
me. If less drastic options have been explored and nothing seems to be
working, what is so wrong with not wanting be alive anymore? How long should
one hold out?

I didn't even know Robin Williams had died -- an unintentional byproduct of no
longer using Facebook and Twitter which I guess has deprived me of "news".
It's sad in that I wish it didn't have to be that way, but I also find it
bittersweet in that his suffering has ended. _I_ would rather he be alive, but
he didn't, and he's the only one who had to live his life, so I don't feel
that it's my place to regret his decision for him or suggest that he didn't
make the correct decision for himself. Am I wrong for feeling this way?

~~~
collyw
You make a rational case for it, while for many going through suffering every
day, it doesn't seem to be an option. Think of slaves, (and all the modern
more subtle forms of slavery). A far as I am aware the majority still wanted /
want to live despite suffering every day.

I guess the idea (for most western people) is that it is a phase that will
pass / things will improve.

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lumpypua
Heya author, I've found self administering ketamine I picked up off silk road
to be tremendously helpful in managing my depression:

 _Results from a newly published study indicate that intranasal ketamine spray
can produce a rapid and sustained antidepressant effect within 24 hours, and
was well tolerated in a small group of patients with treatment-resistant major
depressive disorder._

[http://www.forbes.com/sites/robertglatter/2014/04/13/intrana...](http://www.forbes.com/sites/robertglatter/2014/04/13/intranasal-
ketamine-promising-for-treatment-resistant-major-depression/)

Take a look into it, and best of luck!

~~~
lumpypua
If ya want more details just reply. I've found information on diy ketamine for
depression to be sparse unless you know where to look. And it's gonna be a
while before any k treatment makes it to market for the public.

~~~
pstuart
Did you need to go into the k-hole to achieve results?

~~~
lumpypua
Definitely not, but you are going to get weird for 45 minutes.

The study in that forbes article used 50mg intranasally (basically snorted).
The earlier study backing ketamine's efficacy[1] used "0.5 mg/kg diluted in
saline, administered over 40 minutes by IV pump". Works out to 35mg for a 70kg
guy with a drug delivery rate in the ballpark of snorting it.

Redosing protocol is up to you, I'd read both papers, track your mood, and
decide something reasonable. [1] dumps a fair amount of K into their
volunteers in one part. Basically the 35mg every two to three days. When
depression hits hard I do 35mg every one or two weeks, and go up to 3 weeks as
I'm feeling better.

I like dissociatives but maaan 35-50mg is pretty much the least pleasant dose.
You're not near k-holing but reality is still pretty bent for about 45
minutes. Normal social interaction is totally out of the question for me and
my thinking is warped. What works best for me to handle it is putting on an
album I can play all the way through, lying down and meditating on the music
until I sober up.

Cheers!

[1]
[http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2935847/](http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2935847/)

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hedgew
>Sadness tends to have a source. Depression does not.

All depression has a source. Often we simply can not understand it (neither
scientifically nor socially). When we do understand the source, it can lead to
more effective treatment; such as better medication, or more effective
lifestyle interventions. In the far future, we may entirely realistically be
rid of depression entirely, if we learn to understand its sources.

~~~
cordite
Perhaps triggers, but I wouldn't say that persistent depression has a source
that is consistently present.

Unless you refer to the source being chemically.

