
Ask HN: How to help a developer that can't pair program? - Eclyps
I&#x27;ve got a developer who seems to be very talented, but absolutely melts when I&#x27;m working with him one-on-one. It&#x27;s like his mind shuts off when he&#x27;s at the keyboard and we&#x27;re trying to work through something - he can&#x27;t type properly, his thoughts race in many different directions, and we never seem to accomplish anything. When he&#x27;s working on his own, though, or isn&#x27;t at a keyboard, he can very clearly explain his thought process and ideas. I know that he&#x27;s not just pretending to know how to code - it just seems like extreme anxiety in certain situations. He&#x27;s aware of the situation, and has apologized for it a handful of times.<p>I feel like this is preventing him from reaching his potential, but I&#x27;m not sure how to approach it. Should I be putting the bulk of my efforts into helping his anxiety, or should I put my efforts into working with him in ways that are more comfortable for him? If you have been on either end of this situation, could you offer any advice?
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brudgers
Pair programming is not a silver bullet. It's a tool that's appropriate
sometimes and not others. Rigid adherence to pair programming as a practice
lacks appreciable agility...if you get my drift. If the act of pair
programming produces worse results, then not being able to pair program _is
not limiting_ their potential. Trying to pair program is.

I worry that framing the relationship from the outset in terms of "I've got"
suggests a particular mindset in regard to the distribution of power. Ideally
leaders work for their team rather than owning it. The developer isn't the
necessarily the place to "start fixing things."

Good luck.

~~~
Eclyps
Thanks for the feedback. We actually don't do a great deal of pair-
programming, but it made for a short title that got the point across. I agree
that positioning it as the problem was a poor choice of words on my part.

I do disagree about the framing of my colleague, however. If I were to say
that I have a friend that knows a lot about geography, I don't think that it
would be implied that I see myself as the more powerful individual. My entire
reason for posting was to better understand how I can take my own time and
apply it to helping someone else grow. Without much more context, though, I
can understand how it may have come off differently.

