

Update HN: Reverse Marriage Proposal - She said yes - krmmalik
http://krmmalik.posterous.com/41421929

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srean

      If i get:-
    
        * $500 in donations, i'm willing to put together a blog
      post outlining the specifics of what i did differently to
      what i would normally do , and will respond to all
      comments on the blog post
        * $1000 in donations, im willing to put together a 20
      to 30 minute audio outlining what i have learned
        * $2000 in donations i'll put together an actual video
      and upload to YouTube. (Im saying this one rather
      reluctantly. Im quite a shy fella) 
    

Huh! what is this ? some kind of a marriage proposal porn ?

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petervandijck
Flagged.

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NovemberWest
My account is apparently too new for me to submit this, which I guess answers
my question as to how to post it (on its own or as a reply):

<http://www.novemberwest.com/blog/?p=136>

Perhaps this will foster a little conversation here.

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allenbrunson
Whatever problem you had posting, it wasn't because your account is too new.
It's all too common to see submissions from accounts that are like ten seconds
old.

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NovemberWest
I got a message saying something like "You are posting too fast. Please slow
down." And my post did not show up. (I thought it was the most lovely
rejection I've ever seen. And I write polite letters of that sort as part of
my job.)

Perhaps my inference is incorrect. Or perhaps policy recently changed. <shrug>

~~~
allenbrunson
Uh oh. That's what happens when the site suspects abuse. Accounts that have
been hell-banned for bad behavior get that message, for example.

You are not hell-banned, because I can read and reply to your messages, but
perhaps it's something similar. Have you had an account here before? Has
somebody in your house had one? I'm not exactly sure how it works, but the
site could have your IP address flagged or something.

~~~
NovemberWest
Thanks for the heads up.

I do have another account, in good standing. I don't want this website
associated with that account, so I created a second one. It isn't intended as
"spam" at all. But I realize there are challenges in trying to keep the two
things separate and not have this account look like spam. I've thought a lot
about whether and how to develop this new site and keep it separate from other
stuff I am doing and I don't really have any good answers. I imagine in the
long run it will probably not remain separate. For now, I want it to blossom
on its own.

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krmmalik
I can understand people may not agree with my idea to raise finance for the
wedding this way. I can totally understand and appreciate that, but i expected
people to be a little more civil in their objection.

For the lady that wrote the blog post. Interestingly you make a very valid
point and i agree completely that the man pursuing the woman is a failed
paradigm.

As for the eloping suggestion. Believe you, me. I would love to do that. I
have seriously considered it.

Unfortunately, i come from a very traditional culture, and so does she. It
would be considered very taboo. I dont want to upset her or her family in any
way.

~~~
NovemberWest
I think there are ways to monetize this information but I think you are going
about it all wrong. You don't want your families to disapprove or be upset but
you seem oblivious to the way you are alienating the business community/your
audience. Ask around. Find a more above-board means to make money off this.
Win-win.

As for tradition and family: I generally feel they are allowed to set
expectations if they are willing to help make it happen. If the expectation is
that all the money comes out of your pocket, I don't feel they have any say.
But I realize I come from a different culture.

FWIW: My family was upset when they learned of my elopement. My marriage
lasted longer than either of my siblings. I think I did the right thing.

~~~
krmmalik
PS - Time is of the essence PPS - It would take me way too long and spin-off a
whole new conversation to explain the dynamics of my culture and background.

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NovemberWest
And it would take me too long to explain why I disagree with a great many
things about how things are currently handled and see no reason to go along
with them -- which is why I started this blog: So I can pontificate at length,
partly in hopes of helping others get a bit more free of such burdens.

Again: Best of luck.

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stray
Where's the reverse donation button?

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krmmalik
Haha. Too funny. Touche!

