
If Your Dreams Don't Serve You, Let Them Go - frankdenbow
https://www.inflectionconf.com/blog/if-your-dreams-dont-serve-you-let-them-go
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reidjs
I have a friend in SF who’s addicted to the startup hustle I’ve been trying to
convince he should really just get a “normal” tech job for a while. It hurts
to watch him struggle with money and I don’t know how feasible it is to start
your own company when you yourself are barely surviving.

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TuringNYC
He's pretty lucky he's in tech and has multiple paths forward. I have friends
in this situation "stuck" at law firms or "stuck" in a medical fellowship.
They have now already invested 4 to 9 years and tons of debt into a career
with limited realistic choices but to continue moving forward on a path they
don't like (sometimes something they got pushed into by family/society/etc.)

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stevenkovar
The big insight in this post to me is learning how someone else handles a
crisis of identity. Something you usually don't know you're going through
until it's over and have had time to reflect.

Thanks for sharing, Frank.

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frankdenbow
I needed enough time distance to really analyze if things were making sense or
not. As a generally even keel person, I didnt notice how stressed I was until
I signed the offer and realized, oh yea, I was holding back a lot of my
thoughts and potential.

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jareau
Reading this was so refreshing. A few years ago, I shut down a startup I'd
spent the past 4 years on and honestly didn't know what to do with myself. In
hindsight, it was obvious I was slowly killing myself with stress but I was so
attached to the company I couldn't walk away. I appreciate contributions like
this to the startup/hustle narrative. Thanks for sharing, Frank!

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frankdenbow
Did you feel the stress at the time or was it a slow creep? In my case I felt
like I as dealing with it fine, but realized a drastic change in how I was
thinking after it was over.

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avinium
If you look back now at the comments you received about limited growth
potential/competition/etc, do you agree in hindsight?

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dzello
Thanks for sharing your story Frank. Feelin the honesty hard. I was lucky to
be on that GOAP trip with you and Doug. Microsoft just got themselves an
awesome new advocate.

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jl108
Frank, thank you for sharing your story. I've been in a similar situation for
the last twelve years (chasing some dream, trying to make it work), and I'm
finally letting it go too. Reading your post was so helpful for me (helping me
know I'm not alone), and also just tremendously heartwarming because you've
found stable ground after all this while. Keep being awesome.

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xulucy
Real talk and inspiring talk. Thank you for sharing the honest story and
reflection that all in the startup world need to hear.

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frankdenbow
Had to share, it weighed me down for too long.

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vfinn
That was beautiful. One of the best blog posts I have seen in a while. Keep it
up.

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hndamien
This is tough. I let go of a dream after 7 years of toil. 6 months later it
came true for somebody else that I let it go too. Now to build a new reality.

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webmobdev
True. This is the toughest lesson of life that I still have to master -
learning to let go, and not feel like a failure.

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tbabb
That color scheme physically hurts to look at. I would like to read this, but
I don't think my retinas could take it.

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frankdenbow
yea you're right, we have to work on it for sure. You can blame me :)

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bemmu
I liked it in that it conveys "what you're about to read is going to be
something different".

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alekseypo
Thanks for sharing! Glad you came through mentally and physically intact.

