

Facebook considered harmful for adults (a letter from my aunt) - mcu

I love my Aunt, but, I fell off my bed laughing while reading this.<p>=====<p>Mike,<p>I am not sure why but [REDACTED] has invited me to be his Facebook friend. I do not know him and I worry about his motives. I know he is a linux user and I worry he will hack me. I do use my bank accounts here not that I feel he would steal but I worry the info is vulnerable to someone who knows what they are doing.<p>Ok so here is my issue. We are not friends. I have never spoken to him only a few emails.Why in the world would he even go looking for me on Facebook. I'm sure he is a nice enough guy but really, I have only recenlty even started going there at all when I have messages.<p>What do you  think..<p>PS, He has no idea im your Aunt.
XOXOX.<p>=====<p>I should mention that she and my uncle own their own craft business and have the kind of life that most of us would kill for.
======
michael_dorfman
Maybe it's just my own raging adulthood, but I don't get the joke here, much
less see what would cause you to fall off your bed laughing.

She fears that her computer may be vulnerable to hackers, and believes that
Linux users are more likely to be sophisticated computer users who "know what
they are doing." Both sound like reasonable assumptions to me.

She finds it creepy that someone she hardly knows went to the bother to look
for her on Facebook, and then attempted to "Friend" her. Once again, I have to
agree. Speaking only for myself, I tend to take a Groucho Marxian position,
and think that anybody who actually wanted to "Friend" me on Facebook must be
such a loser as to be someone I'd never actually want to be friends with, and
conversely, all of my real friends know me well enough to communicate with me
through other, more appropriate channels.

So, tell me: what's so funny? Unless what you mean is really "Facebook
considered pointless by adults", in which case I have to concur.

~~~
iigs
_So, tell me: what's so funny?_

That innocent childhood naivety ("Mom! This looks scary!") coming from a very
unusual source.

I'm 29, an age where a few of my friends "grew up" online, and a lot of them
did not. It's remarkable to see the behavior of those that "did not": they
tend to have really different attitudes toward things like sharing photos and
exposing information about their lives to people. Social network "Friends" are
a great example of this: people that grew up "offline" tend to treat the
social network friend links like true friend connections, but "online" people
tend to assign social network "friend" status to acquaintences.

Someone that grew up "online" might really find the "offline" behavior amusing
or endearing, particularly when accompanied by such a dose of tech-
antisavviness.

Counterpoint: I grew up "online" but ended up with somewhat severe sociopathic
tendencies -- I go to lengths that surprise myself in order to keep my real
and online names disassociated.

~~~
indiejade
I am 29 as well, and have also noticed the odd gap between people who found
the "social" web before MySpace and those who found it after (all those
facebook kids!). I almost want to say it's possibly a "generational,"
phenomena, but probably not.

Maybe it's more or less cliquish. The machine built before the hype machine is
_much_ more elegant.

Facebook does remind me of a data mining monster. And being that it was
"founded" by one who is younger than me, I can't say I trust it any further
than it can be metaphorically thrown.

------
thismat
I honestly think she did a bang up job assessing what might be a threat, and
then seeking help before making a rash decision she wasn't comfortable with.

She articulated her fears pretty well, and she had a clue that Linux was a
platform for savvy individuals that would put her at an immediate disadvantage
to him.

I wish more people let alone motherly aunt figures could articulate their
fears that well.

------
derefr
This is the big gap between the Internet generation(s) and previous: when your
life wasn't automatically public, there was a much greater aspect of fear to
the thought of losing your privacy. I recently was helping my mother to send a
large collection of pictures to her own father. I told her that, since the
pictures were in Picasa, the simplest method would be to enable the Photo Sync
feature for the album, and then send her dad the link to the uploaded album
(though not in so few words.) She seemed to be fine with this, until, in a
slight rephrasal, I told her that she could send the same link to her sister,
because the pictures were "on the web." She froze up at this with a look of
shock and revulsion, And told me to take them down. I explained that the link
was private, and that no one could access it but the people she sent it to; I
explained that people put pictures of their houses and vacations up completely
publically all the time, and nothig ever happens to them; I explained that
hackers really don't care about her pictures, but she wouldn't listen to any
of it. Her response: "loose lips sink ships."

~~~
edw519
_the link was private, and that no one could access it but the people she sent
it to_

 _nothig ever happens to them_

She already has many points of reference; she knows this isn't true. Why don't
you?

------
ibsulon
First thought: your aunt is trolling you.

Second (and more serious) thought: This speaks to the fear our elders have
with computers. Many of us used this to help ourselves through college as
technical repair, and Best Buy has done a good job as well. This, however,
reminds me that we should be thinking about startups that solve this pain.
It's the 50-year old equivalent to "will this help me get laid?" What will
give that target demographic peace of mind about their computer use?

------
briancooley
A lot of my thirtysomething friends put things on their FB profiles that would
be useful in a social engineering attack. Things like when they graduated high
school, photos of their first car, etc, often as the answers to "25 Things,"
or quizes, or such.

Some of those nuggets of information provide answers to questions that online
banks ask for account verification.

------
abyssknight
"I know he is a linux user and I worry he will hack me."

For this I must share with you:
<http://www.adequacy.org/stories/2001.12.2.42056.2147.html>

~~~
lee
Too funny!! Lunix! "In order to get rid of it, you will have to send your
computer back to the manufacturer, and have them fit a new hard drive. Lunix
is extremely dangerous software, and cannot be removed without destroying part
of your hard disk surface." ----you've made my day!

------
mvid
It is a scary world we live in. I am always worried about some linux user
waiting a dark alley to break my windows and steal my identities..

------
edw519
Perhaps you should shop laughing and start listening...

1\. 90% of the rest of the world has no idea what we do. It's all magic to
them. But they're not dummies. So when they say something ridiculous, we
should help them, not laugh at them.

2\. Most of your future customers will (obviously) come from that 90%. If they
sense your attitude, they will take their business elsewhere.

3\. Their fears and ignorance = your learning opportunity about your market.

4\. She's your aunt, for crying out loud, and she actually bothered to email
you. Show a little compasion and be glad. Lots of us never hear from our
relatives.

~~~
mcu
Huh?

I think that you may be overreacting a bit.

I immediately called her back, explained what Linux was, how Facebook works,
and a little about IP addresses.

This woman was like a mother to me, she laughed herself after I explained
everything to her!

~~~
edw519
_I think that you may be overreacting a bit._

Maybe.

It's so easy for a bunch of hackers to fall into "group laugh" that I thought
I'd even things out with an alternate point of view.

Sounds like you have a great relationship with your aunt. Good for both of
you!

