
VCs to avoid taking money from - BerislavLopac
http://www.startupcfo.ca/2013/01/who-not-to-take-money-from/
======
gyardley
Must we really go around calling a bunch of random people 'douche bags' for
behavior that in some cases, isn't even remotely problematic?

One of the most astute VCs I know and have worked with came from money and
knows his way around a regatta. Hell, I've even seen him with a pastel sweater
around his shoulders.

According to this random CFO guy I've never heard of, that makes my VC a
'douche bag' - but if I was raising money again, I would have that VC involved
again in a second.

Sometimes criticism teaches you more about the criticizer.

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euros
I once had a "potential investor" (worth $80m) who wanted a meeting with my
patent attorney. So, I made the arranged for us to meet him at our usual
meeting place - the coffee shop.

We walked in and the "potential investor" said: "we haven't got time for a
coffee", I replied: "well, this is where we are having the meeting"... "what
HERE? doesn't he have an office? This is a very bad start."

In walked my patent attorney wearing a cagoule and a rucksack. The "potential
investor" made it perfectly clear that he was not impressed (he did not even
get up to shake his hand). He interrogated him for half an hour before saying:
"good, you can now drink your coffee".

I realised that day, that money, is only a small part of being a great VC.

~~~
hnriot
This happens a lot and tech is not without its elitists, but that doesn't
excuse rude behaviour. I have found this happens a lot, but a lot less than in
England. Fortunately we have people like Zuck in a hoodie and Brin on the
subway, both with more money than god to thank for leveling the playing field
a little.

Next time, don't wait for the VC to let you drink your coffee. You could be
American about it and pander to his/her ego, or you could be British (since
you use both word forms I am assuming you're also a transplant) about it and
tell him to go fuck himself.

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orangethirty
From my own experience:

 _The cattle farmer:_

Goes to pitch events to pick startups to invest to. Watches every pitch as if
it was cattle on the auction block.

 _The Bro:_

Only invests because he thinks you are cool. No interest whatsoever in seeing
you succeed.

 _The mother:_

Wants people to know that he gave birth to your idea.

 _The loan shark:_

Calls every week to ask you about his money.

 _The infomercial:_

Only talks about how awesome your life/starup would be if you did X (something
they came up with).

~~~
cloudsteam
I could do with a Bro for my site

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gesman
It's a loser's game to bitch about inexperienced bankers or laugh about
celebrities.

Winners do whatever necessary to engage their business idea. That may or may
not include taking money from anyone in that list.

~~~
confluence
Wonder how you'd choose to marry someone...

Winners marry for money! Only the game matters!

I wonder if you're actually trolling or just incredibly naive.

~~~
chris_wot
I don't think he was talking about success in any area of life except raising
venture capital.

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photorized
How about avoiding VCs in general. Unfortunately, that's not how things are
done these days.

~~~
grinich
Raising VC is kind of like buying a car. If your destination is decently far
away, it makes a lot of sense.

The problem is that a lot of these folks don't know how far they're actually
going. They end up buying a car to drive around the corner or just down the
block. And now they have to deal with parking, gas, insurance, etc.

Even worse, they're usually going in the wrong direction initially. It's a
much better strategy to start on foot, go for a quick walk, and then get a
bicycle. When the bike's tires are bald, then it's time to think about buying
a car.

If you've driven there before (or somewhere very similar) either alone or in
the passenger seat, then maybe you can skip straight to buying a car. But then
again, it's a different time of day and traffic is unpredictable.

And once you're driving, don't be afraid to pull over and ask for directions!

~~~
doktrin
I sort of wish this wasn't in a sub-comment, because it's a valuable
contribution that may get buried.

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notdonspaulding
"VCs from whom you should avoid taking money"

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imwhimsical
I seem to have developed an aversion beyond words can convey, about people who
shamelessly rip-off the svbtle layout. This is simply wrong on so many levels.

And you've just made it look uglier with those noob-ish buttons.

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tomasien
Do people in SV really have the luxury of picking and choosing their VC's like
this? Man that sure hasn't been my experience.

~~~
majani
A lot of startup articles need to come with a disclaimer: "FOR SILICON VALLEY
ONLY."

I really don't think they appreciate just how unique their situation is over
there.

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chris_wot
Is there anybody left?!?

~~~
meric
Yes, Mark MacLeod.

~~~
chris_wot
I had a look at his LinkedIn profile, and this is what I found:

1\. A finance guy

2\. A name dropper of numerous corporations... Mind you, this _is_ LinkedIn...
But I seem to see that in a lot of places...

3\. A director on 4 boards

4\. A snappy dresser: <http://about.me/markmacleod>

Ok, I'm being harsh here. I'm sure he's fine, but if you followed his own
advise, you'd have to rule him out!

~~~
gozmike
I've taken money from Mark and can say quite honestly that he's provided a
ridiculous amount of value to our company since coming on board. He's an
operator and a realist who really is "founder friendly"

~~~
chris_wot
I've no doubt about that. I'm merely pointing out that his own list removes
him from the pool of VCs that he speaks of. I just don't think his post was
well thought through, to be honest. I don't know anything at all about Mark,
I'm glad to see that he is top quality!

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patrickk
I think the title is somewhat misleading.

"Types of VCs to avoid taking money from" would be better. It sounds like he's
going to name actual people to avoid, rather than general VC archetypes.

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confluence
_> On a similar note, it’s pretty fashionable these days to see party rounds
with lots of investors each putting in a small amount of money. Mark Suster
calls this collecting logos._

Collecting logos - now that's a new one. I used to call that "buying trophies"
:)

Another saying that I have about Silicon Valley is that it's "Wall Street with
jeans".

There's a lot of money, and a lot of power sloshing around. It's not all
fairytales and lollipops. When you get here prepare to get fucked. Repeatedly.

Before dealing with anyone always ask yourself this question:

 _> "How are they fucking me?"_

It's a line I stole from Jim Messina - Obama's reelection campaign manager.
It's proven quite useful.

Oh and one last important heuristic: never trust a suit. Engineers can be
pretty bad at fucking each other when they become founders - but then again by
then they're just suits.

An even better heuristic: trust no one.

PS - watch this video and get your cynicism on:
<https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uzNRUkl9BoY>

~~~
neumann_alfred
Also see George Carlin's rants about business men (and women with shoulder
pads who repeat the worst mistakes of men) ^^

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jpdoctor
> _But unless a potential investor is listing people he plans to intro you to,
> you shouldn’t be hearing names._

But remember: Anyone that he lists does not work for you. Odds are high that
your company will fail, and that person knows where his next meal ticket is
coming from.

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antr
Although I agree with most of the "groups" mentioned, most of the time,
beggars can’t be choosers.

It's a shame so many investors talk about which types of people not to take
money from but never give names. It's high school all over again.

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ihaveajob
Probably not a popular place to talk about that, given the audience :)

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jaredstenquist
Looks like you could use some VC money to keep your blog online :)

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radley
I wish the title wasn't changed. The original was more vague and matched the
stereotype based list.

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saosebastiao
Might want to avoid saving your female pronouns for titles like "The
Blabbermouth".

~~~
LukeShu
He also used female pronouns for "The Generalist", and used "he or she" for
"The dude on 20 boards".

My guess is that he was thinking of specific people when he wrote each.

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f4stjack
On a totally unrelated note, is it me only who found this site's hiding of
svbtle theme disclaimer disturbing?

~~~
lmm
Yup, just you.

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hhuio
I'm really interested who this yacht guy is :)

