
The Cost of Caring - pmcpinto
http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2016/04/11/the-sacrifices-of-an-immigrant-caregiver
======
p4wnc6
I have also faced a situation like this, even living in America. I have been
required to send money home (a poor region of the Midwest) due to an extreme
family circumstance involving potential child abuse, a bitter and drawn out
custody dispute for one of my siblings, and a slow-moving criminal case that
would affect the custody dispute, as well as some mental health issues for
involved parties.

For a long time it required me to work jobs in which I was treated horribly,
and I had to forgo any extraneous personal consumption and give up life goals
like ever owning property. I went through many years in a row in which I
couldn't even afford to fly home for holidays because the ~$750 plane tickets
represented money that had to go to legal fees.

It damaged my personal relationships with friends and romantic partners,
embittered me towards employers who delighted in my lack of negotiation power
because of the situation, and led to a lot of youthful years gone by in which
I accomplished none of the goals I had.

And, this was just for basic protection -- protecting a minor from a potential
source of criminal harm. I will never recover from that financial loss, and
we're not even talking about affording an extreme luxury like a college
education which the article's protagonist worked to provide.

I wish I was so lucky as Emma that the problem I had to solve, and in doing so
go years without even seeing my family, was to pay for college, instead of
paying for basic legal protection from serious abuse.

It has really disillusioned me with America. I have always worked unbelievably
hard and sought to work intelligently and efficiently. I have fancy
credentials and have worked well-paying, sought-after jobs. But it's all
hollow and empty. I feel American style corporations are one of the primary
sources of harm and suffering in the world, and that in America there is no
such thing as pulling yourself up by your bootstraps. Your hard work is
irrelevant.

At any rate, I sympathize with the article's story, but I wish that it wasn't
seen as something that happens to "other people" ... the same kind of long
suffering hardship and unrecognizeably ascetic sacrificial life style can
happen to anyone, from any place or background, if you are unlucky enough.

~~~
erikpukinskis
I agree with you 100%. The institutions we participate in are amongst the most
harmful institutions in the world. Just because the harms are more indirect
and hidden from view than the typical warlord does not make its participants
better people.

There's this attitude in America that if you can maintain a bubble of
ignorance around the consequences of your lifestyle that you're not
responsible for the harm it causes. It's sad.

------
kspaans
"Although her employers paid her in cash, Emma, like many of her friends, paid
taxes, so that she would be in better standing if immigration laws were ever
relaxed."

How does this work? Do they apply for SSNs and then file? How does this
process not cause undocumented workers (possibly overstaying visitor visas) to
be deported immediately?

~~~
noir_lord
My understanding is (I'm not from the US) that the IRS doesn't really care
where money comes from as long as you pay what you owe which is why the tax
return forms have boxes for illegal earnings.

They aren't (again iirc) classed as law enforcement so they largely don't
care.

Also and this speculation who better than the IRS to know how much of the US
economy depends on undocumented workers doing the jobs that native workers
don't want to do.

