
How Grindr Is Changing the Way We Connect - swohns
http://bits.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/03/10/how-grindr-is-changing-the-way-we-all-connect/
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charlieok
“The one question that Mr. Woo could not answer is how to develop a version of
Grindr that works for straight people and women. The company tried to release
an app called Blendr, but it has been far less successful that its
predecessor.

It could simply be that “gay men are early adopters,” he said. “I joke that
the wheel was invented by a gay man so he could get to his hookup faster.””

Is this really such a mystery? Women are not nearly as interested in meeting
strangers online -- especially for random hookups -- as men are.

~~~
Aloisius
Plenty of women are interested in meeting strangers and some even in hookups,
but only in a safe setting where there is no physical risk and they can leave
anytime. It is hard for a hookup service to provide that.

~~~
jiggy2011
Yes, and in my experience women like to be wooed to some extent even for a
"casual encounter" whereas guys just want to get on with it.

"What is the minimum number of metres I need to walk to get laid" is a
solution looking for a problem here.

~~~
TillE
While there are certainly some gay men who want literally nothing but sex,
many want some kind of connection, at least to verify that the other person is
minimally sane and practices good hygiene.

It's really not so different. The "wooing" process for casual sex generally
involves little more than giving signals that you're a normal person, and not
a weirdo, creep, or bore.

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chimeracoder
> Mr. Woo said a Grindr survey of its users found that two-thirds of them were
> using the application to find new friends, to network or to kill time, as
> well as to hook up.

I keep hearing this from friends, and I honestly don't get it. The couple of
times I've gone on Grindr, all I saw were things like:
<http://www.douchebagsofgrindr.com/> and <http://www.reddit.com/r/lolgrindr> .
Those certainly represent the worst-of-the-worst, but it's clear what the
'Grindr community' is looking for when they log in to the app.

On the other hand, a friend of mine just told me last week about an in-depth
political debate he got into with a guy on Grindr. While I can think of of a
few ways to segue from 'check out this dick shot' to 'what do you think of
Mitch McConnell', it still leaves me a bit baffled to hear that this actually
happens.

My perspective may be a bit skewed because of my work with more, um
"traditional" online dating (a phrase which makes me chuckle to type), but I
have a hard time understanding how such meaningful conversations arise from a
platform where people are quite clearly on the hunt.

Sidenote: It also amuses me how many of Grindr's ads are clearly hetero-
oriented ('sexy [female] strippers nearby', etc.). I know they try to keep up
the pretense that it's a 'social networking app for men', not _just_ a hookup
app for gay men, but.... still!

~~~
potatolicious
I do feel like the article is substantially overstating the generalizability
of Grindr's model. I'm not that surprised that people are having substantial
conversations on the service, but while the article seems to see this as
Grindr evolving beyond its initial premise, I see it as simply a deepening of
a mature platform.

Which is to say, if you ever took away the hookup aspect of Grindr, everything
comes crashing down. The platform isn't growing _beyond_ hookups, it's
layering things on top of it, which seems like a natural evolution. This is
great, just not quite as world-changing as the article would have us believe.

I sincerely doubt Grindr is a herald for a new means of mass communications.

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NelsonMinar
My favorite thing about Grindr is the way the app itself is community-neutral.
You could reskin the app and call it "Bible Study Finder" and it would be a
fine way to find nearby Christians who want to have an intimate discussion
about Jesus. I'm gay myself and do think there's something special about gay
male hookup culture that Grindr is uniquely suited to. But the basic lesson of
locative apps has to be reusable in other communities.

~~~
jiggy2011
Well, you might want to change the backend database as well or that could lead
to some slightly awkward situations..

~~~
Evbn
Outside of the particular constraints of the gay community (and a few other
niches), you probably don't need a backend database at all. All the work could
be done in the frontend.

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choxi
it's concerning to see TechCrunch-esque "How [X] is Changing the Way We [Y]"
articles on the New York Times

~~~
glurgh
It's an NYT blog, not an article. And you probably mean 'disconcerting'.

~~~
pessimizer
'disconcerting' means something like disorienting,confusing, or plan-upending.
'concerning' means that it looks like a problem that may need attending to;
that causes concern. <http://thesaurus.com/browse/concerning> : "There are,
however, several points in the article that are concerning"

~~~
glurgh
The trouble is, that's not what 'concerning' means. It does not mean 'causes
concern'

<http://www.merriam-webster.com/thesaurus/concerning>

The usage you're describing might as well be met with the question 'Concerning
what?'.

~~~
Evbn
Definition 3, my friend.

~~~
glurgh
Definition which?

Let's take a look at the relevant one from the OED.

1.1 That is of concern, that gives cause for consideration; important,
weighty. arch.

Note the annotation 'archaic' - as in, not actually in current use. Words do,
indeed, have multiple meanings. They do also have common usage and this one is
just silly and bad writing. 'Concerning' does not mean 'cause for concern' -
if you are sure of the contrary, find me a non-blithe usage of it, in that
sense, in any current publication that is not a forum post or blog.

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moe
Since this PR fluff-piece doesn't even try to answer its own question I'll ask
a more interesting one: How much did grinder pay for that advert in the NY
times blog?

It's not like these fuc^H^H^Hhookup sites are a new thing. AdultFriendFinder
launched in 1997 and literally dozens of such sites have existed for a
similarly long time.

~~~
Evbn
If they paid, they used grindr to find a journalist looking for a casual story
hookup, which makes it a relevant story.

Seriously, the NYT blogs are basically people emailing their friends for
topics. I get them all the time due to my network of past associates who have
become bloggers for NYT, WSJ, etc.

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martinced
Oh woaw. When I saw that Californication episode I thought that such an app
was pure fiction : )

