

Danger signs to search for in your writing - RiderOfGiraffes
http://io9.com/5520058/4-danger-signs-to-search-for-before-sending-off-your-novel

======
RyanMcGreal
Don't forget:

* The passive voice is to be avoided.

* You want to not split your infinitives with a negative.

* In order to streamline your text, take out superfluous filler like "in order to".

~~~
Gormo
Also:

* A preposition is something you should not end a sentence with.

* Never use stupidistic adjective forms.

* All generalizations are bad.

~~~
alabut
" _A preposition is something you should not end a sentence with._ "

Reminds me of a joke:

A southern belle is on spring break with her friends when a couple of preppy
types settle in next to her on the beach. She tries to be friendly to the
nearest girl and says "where are y'all from?"

The snooty girl says "I'm from somewhere where they teach you not to end
sentences with a preposition."

Without missing a beat, the southern girl says "where are y'all from, bitch?"

------
SlyShy
General principle: short sentences convey speed, long and meandering sentences
will give the reader a sense of drawn out time. A pitfall many writers fall
into is over describing their action scenes, which makes them seem oddly
sluggish and dull.

The revision shown in the article to "A Bad Uncle lifted Captain Samson over
his head and hurled her over the edge of the catwalk," is an example of this
problem. The reader knows how you throw someone, they don't need an
explanation.

"The Bad Uncle hurled Captain Samson over the edge." (Presumably the reader
knows they are on a catwalk, too, so "the catwalk" is unnecessary.)

If it is really important to convey that the Bad Uncle is very strong you
could do "The Bad Uncle hurled Captain Samson over his head, off the catwalk,"
or something similar.

Edit: Also, the article discourages adverbs, but doesn't mention that
adjectives are similarly bad. Most adjectives can be better conveyed through
an action or specific detail. Don't say "she was nice", but do show her
helping a lost child.

~~~
danh
Another rule: use short words.

"Short words are the best and old words when short are best of all," as
Winston Churchill would have it.

~~~
Perceval
Churchill is probably getting at the distinction between Germanic and Latinate
root words in English. Hemingway used to write with a obvious preference for
Germanic root words, which were short and tough and had a pleasing sound.
Latinate root words are usually long ten-cent words lacking the same
utilitarian grace of their Germanic root analogs.

I always thought it would be a fun project to use an etymology database to
make a Latinate-to-Germanic thesaurus, something you could use just like spell
check on a document to suggest Germanic alternatives to Latinate words.

~~~
jpwagner
_I always thought it would be a fun project to use an etymology database to
make a Latinate-to-Germanic thesaurus, something you could use just like spell
check on a document to suggest Germanic alternatives to Latinate words._

struck me funny that more than half of these words are 6+

------
chasingsparks
Do any HNers write fiction? I recently started writing some things just for my
own plesure. It's more rewarding than I expected.

~~~
SlyShy
I write quite a bit, and my start-up project is aimed at writers. Writing is a
lot of fun, if only to serve as a break from programming. Although I would
argue they are rather similar activities, particularly once you get to
refactoring.

National Novel Writing Month (<http://nanowrimo.org>) is a great way for
people to get started, as are local writers' circles. Writing circles are
generally very accepting of new people/outsiders, because everyone is on the
look out for new perspectives.

~~~
sketerpot
When I found out about National Novel Writing Month, I declared February to be
an extra November in my personal calendar, and wrote a 204-page fantasy book.
It actually came out a lot better than I expected; my writing improved
enormously, and once I was a couple chapters in, I was producing something
that was actually fun to read. (It was still hugely embarrassing, but fun to
read.)

I can't recommend this strongly enough. When November comes along, if you have
any interest in writing, you should participate in NaNoWriMo if at all
possible.

------
RiderOfGiraffes
Although targetted at fiction, it's relevant to documentation and other
technical writing. We all bemoan the quality of technical writing, but good
writing is _hard,_ and these hints apply across the board (with some liberal
interpretation).

~~~
ErrantX
Absolutely (:P); this afternoon I went through a 5000 word essay and cut about
40 adverbs.... it's such an easy trap to fall into.

------
amichail
Is English such a mess partly because humans are highly intelligent and can
handle the mess?

If humans were not so smart, wouldn't evolution prune away languages that are
too messy?

~~~
BoppreH
English is a mess compared to programming languages. As a natural one it is
one of the simplest.

The "search and replace" tips given in the article would fail in most
languages. From the top of my head I can think of 4 different ways to say
"There was" in Portuguese, and I bet there are many more.

Not that it's good or bad. It's just a characteristic.

~~~
lmkg
> _As a natural one [English] is one of the simplest._

Strongly disagree. I think it's one of the most baroque, with too many special
cases, irregulars, and gotchas. It doesn't have _specific types_ of
complexity. For example, its morphology[1] seems pretty bare, at least if you
compare it to other Indo-European languages, but even there it's more complex
than Japanese or native Hawaiian. To your point, that makes it mostly amenable
to search-and-replace filters, which is convenient.

[1] Changes to the word reflecting grammatical usage, such as "-ness"
signifying a noun or "-ed" signifying a past tense. These are usually the bits
of other languages that English-speakers think are "hard."

------
LiveTheDream
These danger signs are like code smells, but for literature!

I will use these tips to improve my comments.

------
Darmani
"The main problem with "it" is that it's a pronoun, so you must be absolutely
clear about what "it" refers to. "

Absolutely false. The use of "it" without an antecedent is called "expletive,"
and is perfectly valid. I agree that it's often bland, but there's no need to
go around asking yourself "What does 'it' refer to here?"

~~~
tokenadult
You are correct that the English idiom "It's raining" is just the normal way
to say that in English. The corresponding Russian sentence Идет дождь would
translate literally into English as "goes rain," while the Chinese sentence 下雨
would translate as "falls rain," with the unusual word order being an example
of topicalization in those languages.

------
gruseom
This reminds me of the following bit from a marvelous NPR piece a couple weeks
ago where they interviewed Elmore Leonard and his sons in front of an
audience. (Transcript at
[http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=1252532...](http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=125253280),
but one part was marked "unintelligible" so I've filled it in from memory). C
Leonard is one of the sons (Chris) and E is Elmore:

Mr. C. LEONARD: Well, Elmore, you gave me advice. I told you that I was
writing a novel and you said, good. Don't use any other words but "said" for
dialogue and leave out the parts that people tend to skip. I think those were
the two things you said.

(Soundbite of laughter)

Mr. C. LEONARD: And they're both good, I have to tell you.

Mr. E. LEONARD: They're true today, yes.

------
skotzko
There is an excellent book that no writer should be without: "On Writing
Well," by William Zinsser. A joy to read -- it flows well and instructs
without being tedious.

------
bwelford
Perhaps the biggest danger is a lack of any structure that encourages the
reader to follow through the whole item. If you can give a teaser for the pot
of gold that is buried at the end of the rainbow so much the better.

I find mind maps really help me enormously in getting that right structure. My
first draft or two is purely at the Mind Map level. It's amazing how letting
my thoughts simmer away suggests some new angle or aspect of the subject. I
find FreeMind very user-friendly and I endorse it wholeheartedly. I have no
connection with the creator(s). I'm just a very satisfied customer.

~~~
kalid
Thanks for posting this. I enjoy blogging but have found linear writing
difficult to organize -- I'll have sections above and below, filled with
thoughts, and try to merge them together.

Just yesterday I was playing around with FreeMind and it seems promising -- I
think my next post is going to evolve from a mind map.

