
The Founder’s Battle for Mental Health - buckpost
https://medium.com/@tchebotarev/the-founder-s-battle-for-mental-health-c5d8eaff09c#.g7py1ntcc
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joslin01
> This battle is the worst, because you are fighting it with yourself — not
> with anyone else. It’s damn hard to win against someone who knows you inside
> out and knows your every weak spot (which are plenty).

This line of thinking is one of many general problems with the world. Many of
us walk around fighting a battle in our head that does not exist. The last
line stands out the most because it presumes there could be a winner. How can
that be if you're the one who's making the rules?

It gets worse for founders because there's always something to be doing and
always some problem going on. A couple of mental hops and they've now
incorrectly associated their peace with the success of their business. This is
bound to fail even if you do very well -- you'll always be fighting
"problems".

Forgiveness goes a long way. Learning how to forgive others will teach you how
to better forgive yourself and visa-versa. It's not noble to lash yourself on
the back with a mental whip because you didn't live up to some superficial
aim.

I don't care what happens to this stupid body of mine -- I'll die someday like
the rest of you. This awareness shields me from damaging myself with
superficial qualities that change with each passing whim.

Finally, I don't suggest pumping your body full of drugs to protect yourself
from your thoughts. First, work with the thoughts and forgiveness then move
onto drugs if they would help you better find the peace you need to forgive
and let go.

~~~
startupfounder
> A couple of mental hops and they've now incorrectly associated their peace
> with the success of their business.

This.

Personally, I find physical activity the best way to combat this. Last year I
biked 4,000 miles commuting and on long weekend rides, lost 30lbs and feel
super healthy physically and mentally. Now I attack situations in my business
and personal life like a big hill climb. I know I am going to get through the
pain, I try to embrace the pain because I know if I don't give up I will be
stronger because of it.

~~~
noir_lord
Lost 60lbs last year and got back to a semblance of decent shape (used to be a
exercise nut) that had a big effect but not the largest effect.

That came from sorting out my sleep, I set an alarm for 8am and no matter how
tired I was I got up at 8am, after 3-4 days I naturally fell into a proper
sleep pattern (head down around midnight, asleep by half past).

I've struggled on and off with insomnia since I was a teenager and this "up at
8 _every_ day" approach has worked really well so far, sucks getting up at 8am
on a weekend when you have nothing to do but tight sleep pattern is worth
more.

~~~
randycupertino
Valerian root and trazodone did wonders for my insomnia.

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7cupsoftea
Startups can be super challenging for all of the reasons outlined in that
article. We put together this guide to help explain some of the mechanics that
make startups so stressful. It is primarily based on Jerry Colonna's work. He
is a really good guy who has done some of the deepest thinking in this space.
I highly recommend his work. You can find it here:
[https://www.reboot.io](https://www.reboot.io)

The guide is here:

[http://www.7cups.com/startup-support/](http://www.7cups.com/startup-support/)

If you have thoughts/ideas on how we can make it better, then please let us
know. Thanks!

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medhir
I'm glad to see someone discuss their internal struggles so candidly. I also
have a difficult time with maintaining internal peace, and your
recommendations raise an interesting point.

Human connection keeps us sane, and it's so easy to use social networks in an
attempt to remain connected. But in the process, the actual connection is
missed, instead giving rise to feelings such as shame, anger, and fear. I
believe in the case of mental health, social networking actually amplifies
internal problems because of how one-dimensional the view of others is.

How many people do you know that would post when they are feeling depressed,
or anxious about their life? Maybe if we saw a more holistic view of people on
our networks, they wouldn't have such a detrimental impact on mental health.

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mackeeeavelli
Bipolar business owner here. Staying centered and level in the face of
business ups and downs has been difficult. Very difficult at times. My
reactions to stress and difficult situations, to successes too, are often
imbalanced. Still I've remained successful. Here's how:

Talk therapy. I see a therapist weekly to keep the window's clean. To validate
that what I believe isn't exaggerated by my varying states.

Medication. Very low does Lithium every night.

Sleep. I make sure I get it.

Exercise has been tough to execute on, but is proven - as much as meds - to
help with bipolar and GAD.

Meditation I try to do once a week as part of yoga. I find it helps.

Family and friends who understand and can be supportive also are a huge
help... but are often in the minority of people I know.

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0xEFF
I don't really see what's unique about founders here. Don't these challenges
and recommendations apply to pretty much anyone trying to live a life of
purpose, no matter how large or small?

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magicmu
It's interesting that two of the six things that the author suggests
negatively effect mental health are social media. I think that a better
understanding of the impact of habits driven by social media will be a great
step forward. Of course, they've hardly been such a pervasive force for very
long, so the long-term effects could not be well understood at this point. I
see this generally negative sentiment increasingly often, though, and I
definitely think there's a lot of truth to it.

~~~
mpdehaan2
Social media when it is talking about your startup is particularly hard,
trying to constantly manage the perceptions is a ... huge challenge (even if
you don't have any internal challenges). Founding a startup is also a good way
to work 9 years worth of time in 3 years (or whatever), I sort of view them
like the life-extraction machine in the Princess Bride sometimes. You are
constantly trying to balance all the forces, mini-max everything, wonder about
what you are not doing, and it can always feel like the wheels are falling off
the whole time.

I need to write a blog post on this myself very soon. Props on talking about
it more, and the general theme of having more public conversations on the
subject.

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iss
I'm glad to see that more and more people are talking about this. People like
Evgeny Tchebotarev, Rand Fishkin and Joel Gascoigne are pioneers for openly
talking about depression, loneliness and stress. The dichotomy between what we
really feel and what we need to show others can be really heavy and most of
the times even friends and family are really open to understand what's going
on.

~~~
zappo2938
One way to be able to discuss depression and stress is objectively like in
this video animation of how selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors work.[1]
Prozac, described in this video, is used to treat both panic attacks and
depression. Constant stress from triggers like a boss who insistently attacks
and berates or from endless hours working on a project can deplete available
serotonin which the body produces at a certain rate. Stress untreated can also
in people with genetic preposition trigger more severe diseases like bipolar
borderline personality disorder and schizophrenia. There are other chemical
systems at play such as dopamine and epinephrine[2]. Another way to deplete
available stores of serotonin is using MDMA (ecstasy) which releases all the
stored serotonin in the brain at once, however, that chemical requires about
three days without stress triggers to rebuild during which time a user will
likely experience panic attacks which users often counter with SSRI or THC.

We can mitigate these problems with drugs or by natural means such as learning
how thought patterns effect chemical states of the mind, having a low stress
job, work in a high stress job without giving a shit -- care without caring,
eating healthy balanced foods, and most important daily exercise.

A founder needs to realize that stressors are important motivators for
productivity but they effect chemical balances in the body which hasn't
evolved much in the last 40,000 years. Different employees will have different
coping mechanisms and different types of chemical balances. When the chemical
balances start to become off kilter there are several signs verbal and
physical such as irritability and heavy shallow breathing. It helps to have an
intuitive sense of these and make sure an employee doesn't cross a threshold
or in the case an employee does it is a worthwhile investment to help.

[1]
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ElJaPZtSHoU](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ElJaPZtSHoU)

[2]
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejq99wLEMTw](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejq99wLEMTw)

~~~
Joof
Not to rain on your parade, but the mechanism of SSRI drugs in depression is
unknown. They do affect serotonin and they appear to work (although how well
they work is questionable), but it's far more likely to be something
downstream that isn't necessarily related to the serotonin.

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salmonet
The stress, fear, euphoria, depression associated with starting a startup is
not natural (or at least not normal) and I'm sure most founders experience
emotions on a level that would qualify them as mentally ill at some point.
I've just accepted that it comes with the territory.

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DenisM
Public Service Announcement.

If you are ill, go see a doctor. Skip the travel, spiritual enlightenment, and
other ad-hoc treatment; cut to the chase - visit a psychiatrist. If you
wouldn't treat your own diabetes, you shouldn't treat your own mental health.

Often times an afflicted person would not have the energy to make the visit,
precisely due to the condition that needs treatment. If this happens to you,
ask your friends for help.

~~~
trjordan
> If you wouldn't treat your own diabetes, you shouldn't treat your own mental
> health.

I treat my physical health on my own all the time. I take DayQuil, I take time
off, I lay on the couch and watch TV. Heck, I injured my arm 3 months ago
(tendonitis), and after 2 months of self-treatment, I felt like I wasn't doing
enough, so I went to the doctor and they told me I was doing everything I
could and there was nothing more they could do for me.

I absolutely treat my mental health on my own, and I recommend everybody do
it. It's not some bright line that you cross where you're all of a sudden
"broken" and need a mechanic to fix it. It's the fuzzy art/science of medicine
that absolutely requires patient cooperation and introspection to fix.

~~~
k-mcgrady
I don't want to come off too accusatory here but both your statement and the
parents are damaging in my opinion. Depending on your issues you may be able
to treat your own physical health and mental health but in both scenarios
there may come a time when you require professional help. It may be different
depending on where a person lives but for me there is no cost in visiting the
doctor or getting mental health treatment. So in the example you gave of your
arm it would make most sense to go to a doctor immediately rather than spend
several months self treating when they may have a much more effective solution
to the problem. Also, for mental health in the UK you general require a
referral which can take several months so the longer you delay going to the
doctor the longer you have to live with the issue. It doesn't apply in your
case but it may in others. Not only may you get a solution immediately instead
of spending months self-treating unsuccessfully but you may prevent the damage
getting worse and in the case of mental health you can spiral downwards pretty
quickly. I would say that if you recognise you have a mental health issue you
should seek immediate professional help as if you let it get worse you can
easily get to a point where you no longer have the right frame of mind to seek
treatment even though it is even more necessary.

~~~
trjordan
Right, totally understood. My point is that there are shades of grey.

\- My arm. Did I mention this is the 3rd time I've hurt it this way? Since I'd
seen this scenario before, I had heard professional opinion on how to treat
it.+

\- The cost. Time cost is real. In my case (and most founders), time is more
valuable than money.

Should we encourage more people to talk to more professionals than do today?
Sure, yes, I do think so. But we should also encourage people to self-educate
and self-treat. Those aren't at odds with each other.

