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Isn't this a bit of a mischaracterization?

Coinbase is more like an AC'd storage facility with locks on the doors and people on staff checking IDs than an a "dark open lot 2 miles from my house". Yeah, its not Fort Knox, or even a basic bank vault, but if I think I'm much more likely to lose a thumb drive or have my computer stolen than suffer a catastrophic problem with a storage facility owned by reputable people, how does it not make sense?

That said, I'd probably be thinking about this a lot harder if I had any serious money put away in bitcoin. A storage facility is not an appropriate place to store 5 tons of gold.

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