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OH: "People interested in being brutally honest often seem more interested in the brutality part"

There's nothing wrong with creating a culture (especially a non-hierarchical culture) built around trust, good intentions, and honest criticism. But honestly, I see a lot more damage in almost every community I am apart of (not just tech communities, art communities and political communities suffer from the same things) from people hitting people over the head in the name of "honesty" than from bad ideas or bad practices being allowed to continue because no one bothered to point them out.

"Brutally" not only refers to the force applied during the conversation but also the lack of escalation in communicating the sentiment. There is a difference between being passive/aggressive or subtle and giving constructive criticism in an unemotional way. The former is easier and ineffective whereas the latter is an exercise in empathy and self-control.

"Brutally" may be one of the poorer choices for a modifier intended to communicate a lack of escalation.

Maybe "flatly honest" would be better?

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