It's an unfortunate fact that speaking up often has far more downside than upside for women professionally. It's only recently I think that women have had enough status in the tech community to speak up and not be a) blacklisted or b) harassed by whoever they spoke up to. Clearly, this thread demonstrates that lots of people still feel that their ability to say whatever they want, whenever they want, trumps all. It makes me sad, to say the least.
This is a big community, and I hope you find a new job soon. If there's something I can do to help, you can ping me on twitter or gmail.
Thank you for your support and I'm glad my response to this incident has given you pause. I don't feel like my reaction is extraordinary, so that's been a bit of an eye opener.
I've already got a few leads, I met with a local start-up guru who's going to introduce me to some CEO's. I feel confidant I'll be employed very shortly. I don't feel comfortable reaching out to you privately based on your contact with Adria over twitter but we do run in the same circles and I will reserve a righteous high five for if/when we meet.
Inappropriate reaction: what actually happened.
FWIW, I deplore the high-tech lynching that has taken place, and I'm sorry you lost your job over this drama. I know that my sympathies and $4 gets you a Starbucks latte, but I just want to add my voice to the chorus of people saying that this situation sucks.
In this overall controversy there is a strange amount of blaming two people, on either side, who did not make the decision to fire someone. The people who own that decision are whoever it is at PlayHaven and SendGrid who call the shots.
I'm unclear what you mean by this? Could you clarify what you mean here?
Everyone is applauding Adria for her courage, but taking someone's photo and posting it on twitter is not speaking out. I know that turning to someone and saying "what you said is offensive to me" or reporting them to the staff is not easy, but nevertheless it was the correct course of action. She smiled and took a picture of those guys. She never even bothered to give them a dirty look. And now all these women and men are praising her as a hero.
Worse it appears that some assumptions on her part are not correct. Even worse, her own previous blog post states:
"Because of my experiences growing up, I have triggers. This means that I’m always scanning for danger; for situations that seem like something from the past that could hurt me. When I recognize something that matches, I can overreact and feel intense fear, anger or anxiety. "
her blog name is butyoureagirl.com. What does that mean? "you don't expect me to do all this do you?".
Now she can go write a book, while this guy lost his job. This is so sexist and so unfair and so ironic.
He can write a book too. And he has free time now to do so.
How old are you ? 10 ? Grow up.
Sounds like she might get some commercial value of it since she is doing talking engagements. A wave of publicity will surely benefit her.
I suspect you might have a job offer pretty soon as the larger community realized that this was terribly unfair and it was someone taking advantage of a situation to create controversy.