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I spat my coffee out at this bit:

    if you want a quick fix go buy 
    "learn PHP in ten minutes" and spend
    the next twenty years googling for 
    "how do I compute the length of a string"



He's right though, PHP has no reliable way to obtain the length of a string in characters, unless you keep track of which character set a string is in and carefully manipulate the mbstring functions.

Doing multibyte string handling properly in PHP is way harder than it should have been.


I spat my coffee out laughing. Because he is so right.




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