Here's transcriptions of the texts. There might be some errors, please post corrections (make sure they are transcription errors, and not errors from the original document - there are quite a few of those, perhaps intentional).
IDEAS FOR SALE
(All ideas are sold "as-is" with no warranty implied.
Stories unused within 70 years are forfeit for resale.)
A boy and a girl travel to the beach together, where
they pay a man to xxxxxx receive a bicycle ride from
his monkey. The ride is very uncomfortable, due to
a spoon tied to the seat which keeps whacking their
legs. Nevertheless, they fall in love and are maried.
At the end, the monkey is eating avocado with a spoon.
So that's what it was for. $3
A girl visits a boot store. In one of the racks, she
discovers a village of little people that has ssoraly
been living among the boots. A boy comes off the bus
outside, sees the girl in the store, falls in love and
goes and tells the girl he's in love with her. She
tries to show how the little village works, but he is
only marginally interested in that. They are wed, $1
A man eats corn on top of his house. It is his favorite
pasttime. He marries and dies happy. $3
Adam and Eve are riding bicycles (naked) in the Garden of
Eden. They decide to have a race to see who is the
fastest person in the world. Adam's wheel pops and he
uses the snake St Satan as a replacement tube. $4
A retired police offericer struggles to find acceptances
in the sububan life of Blouder Springs, Colorado. He
befriends a local fishmonger but still must fight his
personal demons. XXX 50
A guy with an enormous chin has the chin surgically
removed and is promptly married. $3
A man who collects prisms finds his house inundated
with refracted light, such that he is transformed into
a superpowerful albino who masquerades at as a wild
horse at night. A local fishmonger feeds the horse and
feeds him a green apple (not knowing the situation here)
which kills the albino half of the guy. So at night now
he's a live horse but is dead albino during the day.
The sheriff's office discovers the dead man and gives
him a proper funeral. During the funeral, the sun sets
and the whole horse body busts through the coffin. $12
A nerdy underappreciated kid wins a raffle and receives
his own Space Shuttle for a week. He installs a soft-serve
ice cream machine onboard and teaches a pet monkey to sit
in the cockpoit. One day, while going home from a birthday
party in space, the shuttle explodes (a la Challenger) $3
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Deep Relationships. Notes on the article
Secrets to deep relationships:
-> asking deep questions
-> talking about deep relationships
with the person.
-> going camping with the person.
-> make the person a part of your
life (this may not work, though think about
it, we live with a mom and dad for many
many years, or we may not know anything deep
about them - might want to ask that person
a deep question to get things going)
-> make up something deep about the
person and then ask "is this true?"
("i heard you have a whole other
side to you that is very interesting
and i want to ask if this is true")
-> avoid using pseudonyms, use your
proper first and last name and avoid
other kinds of lying. (although you might
want to prepare a short
pseudonym that's just for deep relationships -
these special names are code for "i know you
deeper" and don't take pictures of yourself
with the person because pictures make the relation
ship not as deep - unless its a very old picture)
-> touch the person on the arm just once and
no more
-> promise to meet the person one hour from
now in the same spot (secret rendezvous technique,
good for when you're pressed
for time and need a deep relationship.)
-> joke and laugh - these seemingly light things
are surprisingly deep
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On the side of "Life Tips":
deterioration of the
team "social" has made
this a lost art!!
perfect timing
Adam and Eve are riding bicycles (naked) in the Garden of
Eden. They decide to have a race to see who is the
fastest person in the world. Adam's wheel pops and he
uses the snake St Satan as a replacement tube. $4
Imagine turning a snake into a bike tube. You'd end up putting the tail in the mouth. The symbol for a snake eating its own tail is an Ouroboros (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ouroboros) representing cyclicality (hohoho bicycles!) especially in "eternal return".
Funnily enough this cyclicality is mentioned in the idea where a man ends up being a dead albino during the day and a wild horse at night. There's a cycle of the man going from dead albino to a wild horse and even a "Rising from the grave" (http://idioms.thefreedictionary.com/rise+from+the+grave) in the idea's description.
There's quite a few mentions of love and marriage across the texts. There's also a date on the last message (DESOLEE). Could they be related?
Oooh actually look at the second to last point of NOTES and then look at DESOLEE. Of course 18th of April not in "1 hour" but still ;)
One bit I found interesting in NOTES was "avoid using pseudonyms". Could this be something to do with _why detaching from his persona for the last few years?
---
deterioration of the
team "social" has made
this a lost art!!
perfect timing
I think it's supposed to be "term" not "team". I think we all can guess where's he's getting at here though :) (/me looks up the last point in NOTES)
On Pastebin:
Ideas: http://pastebin.com/WSfmLDA5
Life tips: http://pastebin.com/PTF4cfDJ
Test: http://pastebin.com/BExqVKpv
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Full texts (same as Pastebin):
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------------- ---------------On the side of "Life Tips":
---------------Test: