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Somebody, anybody, PLEASE win this with a reasonable programming language instead.

Somebody, anybody, PLEASE tell this guy to be a little less melodramatic.

Why, javascript is ill suited to this task. It is perfectly reasonable to question their choice.

For those that would rather use another language, nowadays can pick from a big hall of languages, besides the usual suspects of Clojurescript and Coffeescript: http://altjs.org/

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