I have begun calling this practice "rapey software" in casual conversation. People usually object when they first hear the term, but when I ask them why they would defend such practices they usually fold.
They didn’t “fold”, they wanted a very uncomfortable conversation to change direction. I’d advise finding a less objectionable term, because many people probably stop listening after your opening salvo.
Objecting to calling a practice rape is not defending the practice. Consider you persuaded most of those people only how little they wanted the discussion to continue.