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I'm here to let you in on the little secrets of fashion so people think you're even more awesome than you already are.

That's how this should read. That would make unprofessional copy look like lazy professional copy, although I suppose there's a more general issue with tone throughout the post. Needless to say a lot of work still needs to be done.

As for the idea itself, I would probably try to appeal to qualities that nerds value. For example, they sure spend a great deal of time making sure their code is elegant. Maybe you could try to see how you can translate the rules of elegance as they apply to code into fashion parlance.

That's really no less objectionable, it's still suggesting self-serving dishonest manipulation of people vulnerable to it.

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