I agree. And frankly I find it the most grating thing about my generation: no spine. Stand up and speak. Don't try to soften the message with tired jokes and deflection. Just make your point. If people are angry, they're angry. Listen to their reactions and if you think you were in the wrong, apologize. If you think you were right, defend yourself. But you never, ever, open with an apology.
More or less. I also think that the issue isn't investing or the like. It's trying to discover what sorts of solutions are available to large organizational problems that make it hard for women to participate comfortably in tech startups. If Marissa Mayer had been pregnant shortly after her job started at Google, what would have been necessary to make it so she could have balanced work and family life better?
Right now we have this myth that companies are machines and parts are largely interchangeable, and that gender doesn't matter in the functionality of the part. I call this a myth because it is a model we use to think about business and make sense of it, even if it isn't literally true. Gender does matter. Parts are not interchangeable. And it might be better to think of companies as ecosystems rather than machines.
The question I have for women in tech is: If you could start a business that would different about the way it would be run? Forget all models of how things are done. What would you change?