Jung Man Yong, a farmer at a collective farm in North Korea, catches a large fish in the river. Exalted, Jung comes back home and asks his wife to fry the fish.
“We can have fried-fish for dinner!” said Jung.
“But we don’t have oil.”
“Then, let’s have steamed fish.”
“We don’t have an iron pot either!”
“OK, then let's just grill it.”
“There is no firewood.”
Angrily Jung goes back to the river and lets the fish go free.
The fish circles around and jumps out of the water, yelling “Long live the General Kim Jong Il!”
At the museum, there is a painting in which Adam and Eve are holding an apple.
A Briton says, “They are Britons. The gentleman is sharing a delicious apple with a lady.”
A Frenchman says, “They must be French. They are walking around in the nude.”
A North Korean says, “They are North Korean. They have no clothes and little food but think of themselves as living in paradise.”
Kim Jong Il inspected a collective farm and found some cute little pigs. He decided to take a picture with those pigs. That evening, a North Korean newspaper editor was put in the awkward situation of writing a caption for that picture to go in the paper.
“Well… ‘Comrade Kim Jong Il among pigs..’”
“No, ‘The pigs are with Comrade Kim Jong Il.’”
“That doesn't work either.”
Finally, the paper was published the next day with the caption, ‘Comrade Kim Jong Il is third from the left.’
A Briton, a Frenchman, and a North Korean are having a conversation.
The Briton: “I feel happiest when relaxing before the fireplace on a winter night.”
Frenchman: “You guys are too old fashioned. I feel happiest when I go on vacation with a beautiful blonde and then beak up with her up on my way home.”
North Korean: “One night, somebody knocked my door. When I opened the door, he said ‘Kang Sung Mi, You are under arrest!’ I felt happiest because Kang was actually my neighbor.”
Kim Jong Il and Vladimir Putin are having a summit in Moscow.
During a break, both are so bored and decided to test whose bodyguard is more loyal.
Putin calls his bodyguard Ivan first and tells him to open the window and throw himself off from the twentieth floor.
Ivan cries “Your Excellency, why are you doing this to me? I have a wife and a kid.”
Putin apologizes and lets Ivan go.
Then Kim Jong Il calls his bodyguard Lee Myung-Man.
“Lee, jump off from the window.”
Without saying a word, Lee tries to leap from the window.
Surprised, Putin grabs Lee to stop him from jumping and says “Are you crazy? You will die if you jump from here!”
Lee struggles to jump, saying “Let me jump! I have a wife and a kid.”
In the Pyongyang Subway, two North Koreans are sitting next to each other.
“How do you do, comrade?”
“How do you do?”
“Are you a Party member?”
“Have you ever been one?”
“Are any of your relatives member of the Party?”
“Then get your feet off from mine, now.”
But while we're on the topic, jokes are often meant to be logically absurd but ring sort of true. For a lot of developers, IE has had more of a direct, negative impact on them than all of those dictators combined, so it kind of feels right, even if it shouldn't. You shouldn't take it so seriously. People getting offended by jokes is offensive to me, because it makes for a more humorless world.
With the political climate of change in afrika and middle east, this might be a great reason for the goverment to tear itself apart as various factions try to take over 'in the name of the people'
We do live in exciting times
This isn't meant as a jab at your comment, I just think it is really funny that anyone including his father would think that he is capable of running a country. On the other hand I guess he can't do much worse than dad.
Kim Jong Il's son Kim Jong Un is the annotated successor, though will be a puppet for a while, if he survives the next few days and weeks.
I'm pretty sure you meant "anointed" there.
Thanks for the note.
Well, except maybe North Korea.
This is a two-year-old article but it's pretty interesting to read: "North Korea After Kim Jong Il: Four Scenarios" http://www.nps.edu/Academics/centers/ccc/publications/Online...
Think of them like a crazy family member that keeps in trouble unless people pony up cash and you pretty much have their entire strategy in a nutshell.
As US News and World Report once commented, threatening the North Korean government with isolation was like threatening a drowning man with a life preserver.....
His son is about to achieve one of the last great overt dictatorships in the world.
I bet everything he is going to want to taste that power for a long time before he actually does something aggressive.
That is not to say he doesnt press his luck, make a strategic failure and gets attacked (e.g. not accepting a rothschild-backed central bank)
There isn't sufficient command & control capability or maneuverability for the NK military to take swift control of the country or perhaps even the capital, if the party apparatus (cadre, spies, police, informants) doesn't stand in its way.
How did Fidel Castro get out of this?
I've highlighted the sort of discussion I'd like to see more of in blue, and the ones that I'd like to see fewer of in red. The unhighlighted comments provide no value to me but I don't mind their existence. Under this scheme, my own comment would be red, because it's meta and off-topic.
 - http://ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html
Also, I'd be hard pressed to find such quality of discussions anywhere else.
"On-Topic: Anything that good hackers would find interesting. That includes more than hacking and startups. If you had to reduce it to a sentence, the answer might be: anything that gratifies one's intellectual curiosity.
Off-Topic: Most stories about politics, or crime, or sports, unless they're evidence of some interesting new phenomenon. Videos of pratfalls or disasters, or cute animal pictures. If they'd cover it on TV news, it's probably off-topic."
BTW American newspapers are much more interested at the politics of other countries because of the leadership of US.
Could it be possible to take control of North Korea by getting a plant in there, killing Kim II Sung and his family and then using his power to work behind the signs and use the totalitarian Stalinist dictatorship to morph the country into a free capitalistic republic? Sounds like something the special forces could do in a few weeks, it just has to be a surprise so the military doesn't get a chance to respond.
Not doing anything seems cruel and unusual punishment. We may be born there in your next lives, wouldn't you want someone to do something about it?
Right, because surprising nutjobs with nukes is a great idea.
EDIT: This joke going over a few heads?
That this isn't reddit seems to have gone over both your heads.