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It's great that you're not the worst offender, but all people commit acts of sexism. All people. People who have been victims of sexism often do it less, but sometimes respond by paying sexism forward. People who put in effort to understand sexism tend to do it less. But we all do it, even the most dedicated of us.

Imagine I asked you to write a page of code to do some specific thing, but told you not to run it. Then I say: Go find as many bugs in your code as you can. You come back with none, saying you've never really noticed bugs in your software. There are two possibilities:

1) Your code is naturally bug free. You are just that special.

2) You stink at finding bugs.

In this case, you're saying you don't see any bugs in your gender programming. How certain are you that #1 is true?

You're absolutely right, and I hope I didn't commit hyperbole in my previous comment. I chose the word "blatant" in "I didn't see blatant sexism" carefully. Honestly, I make offensive comments all the time, but I contextualize my comments to the people in the room. I wouldn't make a joke about the Holocaust to a survivor. However, in the context of my close friends, or coworkers who I know fairly well, it might be OK to mock people who call Obama "literally Hitler". Has some comment I've made offended someone who overheard it? Absolutely! However, I don't consider that "blatant sexism" the same way I wouldn't consider most bugs in my code "blatantly poor programming".

Edit - Relevant: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tbud8rLejLM

This attitude towards the problem has always struck me as counterproductive. It's true, of course, that everyone has biases, but it's possible to address those biases without putting such a strong emphasis on their permanence. (I won't go into whether or not they are permanent here.) That emphasis seems more likely to create a self-fulfilling prophecy than anything else.

I'm only speaking from personal experience, of course. Take it as you will.

Any individual sexist practice isn't fundamentally permanent, but because of time constraints, some will turn out to be, in practice.

I think it's counterproductive for people to shift attention onto the things other "real" sexists/racists do, rather than Do Their Own Work. That's why it's productive to point out that everyone has work to be done.

"all people commit acts of sexism."

I have troubles understanding that, do you have citations or examples?

You wouldn't be asking for examples if he was a woman!

Um, why not? Sorry, but that is over the top. Maybe it surprises you that I have in fact talked to women in real life before. I even asked them questions occasionally. Most didn't falter from that kind of "aggression".

Also I didn't even look at his username, so the gender really played no role.

You asked for an example :)

So my comment was sexist in your opinion? Well I think your comments are sexist. Whatever.

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