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> Not sure where this is coming from.

The American culture is fairly big on mocking people who treat extended family as important. It is considered immature to base your decisions on wish to be close to parents, extended relatives or long friends. Maturity is interpreted as caring about small direct unit. Same goes for needs of those. If a guy lives with disabled parents who he helps, he is seen as looser - by his peers who see him as less then and by romantic partners. Same goes for any living with parents, even if you do your shares of chores, have good relationships and pay them rent. It is being treated as invalid option, even if all involved are happy and save money on the setup.

The fraternity is creating unit you will prioritize over everything else. That primary means over wife and kids, but also over extended family and friends outside of fraternity. It is more of the same, except even more extreme.

The chill out in the evening socialization is something that does not exists and is treated as being lazy. Meanwhile, chatting in office till late hours is seen as being hard worker because you are at work a lot. But then, your social network are your competitors and it disappears when you are sick of change work. I have seen multiple people see regular family visits or partying over certain age or just communal hanging around as immature or somehow weird.

The socialization outside of work, where families socialize as families, across age groups, is considered unimportant. Specifically on HN, extended family is seen as source of free childcare, but never as someone worthy of help.




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