Why people use apps website for personal stuff like that is beyond me. Just because some hip looking company is making an app/website doesn't mean it is secure or good data custodian.
I think what's particularly scary about Grindr is just how much trouble even being on an app like that can get someone in. For example, a colleague of mine is from a country where being LGBT is not really tolerated, in the United States he uses Grindr.
I can imagine an oppressive government buying dating app data to blackmail their users. I noticed in the Tinder TOS thread people complaining about how impossible it is to meet folks in real life.
You can still have friends, friends have friends you can go out with. I'd say from a mental health POV you should be doing social things anyway.
With respect, that is easy to say when ~50% of the population is a potential partner and is easily determinable. When you are gay and the majority of guys are straight, finding partners organically is near impossible (unless you're in a gay bar or something).
I'm not condoning Grindr's actions or that people shouldn't use it with care, but it really has become a key part of LGBT networking in the modern era.
I think it depends on where you are, the city I live in has a very large gay scene. So I've had guys just try to chat me up while I'm at a restaurant or something, I don't mind.
The only time it was a bit weird is when a co-worker told me I look like his husband, not okay to say at work.
Arguing that guys shouldn't use grindr because it puts them in danger and then saying they should chat people up in real life seems bizarre to me. Even in my fairly liberal western country assuming a random guy in a normal bar is gay could put me at risk. Why take that chance when apps full of gay guys exist?
As you just said, it is not easy for people to meet people in a culture where looks and small talk with romantic intent is frowned upon, puts peoples jobs in danger and is generally already going extinct. Plus grindr is used for hookups, and it makes it a lot easier, something that does not have a safe equivalent in real life.
I wasn’t there so I wouldn’t know the tone and context, which can make a difference but... In general, how’s that problematic?
Also, strangers talking to you does not mean they’re sexually or romantically interested in you. Some people are just platonically social. Moreso in some places than others.
There are alternatives, but due to their bad business practices ( such as illegally collecting and selling their massive database of user data, and probably things I’d never think of) impossible to overtake. Consider existing brand awareness, and ongoing massive marketing spend.
We're also deep in a pandemic where olden times means of socialization are pretty restricted. I'm not gonna walk into a bar in 2021 to be assaulted by smoke, sound, and covid. Just the smoke and sound has been enough to keep me out of them for over a decade now.
Smoking in bars is also forbidden here. Many pubs don't play music; and in these COVID times, I often find there's just one other person in there, reading a paper.
>I often find there's just one other person in there, reading a paper.
That sounds pleasant. Smoking restrictions here vary greatly on a city by city basis. Unfortunately the bar scene in my city likes to pretend we aren't in a pandemic and only a few have decided to brave a smaller customer base and ban smoking.
And we also lived fulfilling lives before the invention of the smartphone, tv, printing press, sewer system or agriculture. What exactly is your point?
There’s a user need. In this case it addresses the needs of a minority that’s been, until recently, highly oppressed. You don’t get to just say “things were fine before this existed”.
When something imperfect solves a real problem you don’t get to just say “oh just don’t use it”, especially when it’s not a problem YOU have. Talk about privilege!
Why are you on HN instead of sharing your bad opinions with your friends in person? You have zero reason to be online, conversations existed before the internet, you know...
By gauging the situation and, where appropriate, behaving in a slightly playful, attentive and flirtatious manner towards anyone that catches your fancy (not limited to bar patrons btw.)
The whole point to Grindr is that you can meet so many people online. It's not about replacing flirting, which you're suggesting. People flirt on Grindr -- don't worry. I think you need some experience in how the hook up scene works to really understand it....
