Honestly, I want to stop spending so much time on HN. Or rather I want the part of me that is productive to win more battles over the part of me that is unproductive.
I would very much like to improve my focus and concentration and spend less time just wandering the web. I consider this just as important as any desire for wealth, health, etc. I could have all the money in the world but that wouldn't do anything to help me improve the concentration, self-control and discipline that are required to do really cool stuff in life.
And on that note, I'm quitting HN for the evening and I'm going to go learn something cool.
(Oh, and a whole lot of money wouldn't be bad either).
I want to not have to borrow money from my kids to pay the bills and put food on the table like my parents did with me.
I want to be my own boss, because I have some innate aversion to having my livelihood be at the whim of anyone but myself.
I want to be able to have the luxury of being able to do what I want, when I want without being constrained by the amount of money I do not have in the bank, because although the romantic in me wants to swear up and down that happiness cannot be bought by material things, the realist in me knows that money makes the world go round. And, to quote Boiler Room, "Those who say money can't buy happiness doesn't fucking have any."
I want all of these things because at the end of the day, when I have a family and my kids ask me about my life story, I want to be able to look at them and tell them I came from nothing and made the life I live of luxury, void of financial stresses and the like, all by myself through unadulterated hustle and the belief I am meant for greatness. I want to be able to tell them that they, too, can achieve the same as long as they beat the fuck out of any obstacle life throws their way.
I want to build something that I can be proud of. I want to prove to myself after years of watching other people succeed, that I too can create something meaningful.
I want to be able to dictate my own schedule. I can't see myself being happy any other way.
Oh, and I want to be rich. I've always thought...if other people can do it, why can't I? I don't want to have to worry about money like I did growing up, and I want to be able to one day invest to help other people make their dreams a reality.
Find purpose, because I keep reading that I should and it sounds right. As weak as that sounds, it's a goal that probably can't be completed till I finish education, and I wouldn't normally consider it before then. Thinking about it early makes it feel weak. What's the purpose of thinking about my purpose early?