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Protolol Jokes (protolol.com)
151 points by angadsg on June 10, 2011 | hide | past | web | favorite | 39 comments

I once told an Objective-C joke, but nobody got the message.

The thing about NTP jokes is you have to get the timing right.

I broke up with Java last week, and I still couldn't get any closure.

(I could go on, but I'll spare you - yes, I just thought of these, is it that obvious?)

Please go on. These are awesome.


Java is write once, run anywhere. Perl is write once, turn and run.

OO is like real life: you inherit properties, you cheat a little, then you get divorced, and you're left with an old, broken model

Bash is named after the monkey who successfully typed out Hamlet.

Korn shell was named after the band, and even though America won the cold war, UTF-8 was a notable casualty, so we couldn't use the backward R

The whole class was confused after Jimmy sang 10 little endians and stopped at the second one.

Thank you, I'll be here all week.

I realized this morning that Jimmy should have stopped at the first little endian.

Nah. he should stop after the tenth (second). iterate over (0,1) , but sing (1,10) or i+1. excellent jokes.

EDIT: Oh crap. Was that a joke about stopping on the first endian? If so, I just committed a classic geek fail...

I was referring to "little endianness", where the least significant bit is on the left, which makes 10 = 1, whereas in big endian it would be 2 :)

Not quite right. In a little endian system, the least significant byte is the leftmost one (ie, lowest address). The order of bits within a byte is the same regardless of endianness.

So 10 is always 2.

Ah, well I stand corrected, Mr. Hamming :)

>Thank you, I'll be here all week.

Was this supposed to be a joke too? :)

Just read these all in Rodney Dangerfield's voice, delightful.

  I tell ya, my programming language don't get no respect at all.
  I was telling my coworker about the library I was writing in my 10% time,
  and he asked if it was used for steering a turtle! No respect at all...

  Our meetups don't get a lot of traffic either. Last time only one guy
  showed up, and he was in the wrong room! Turned out he was looking
  for the cooler, more hip meetup across the hall-- it was for Ada! No
  respect at all...

  I told my boss he should give me a raise, that developers for my
  language were in big demand. He said from who, Fischer-Price?

  I tell him no, that Facebook was looking for guys like me, and he said
  that would only be happening if they're looking for a guy to rewrite
  existing code into a language used more widely and was more corporate 
  friendly-- like EmacsLisp!

What was wrong with the plain text version? http://attrition.org/misc/ee/protolol.txt

Much easier to skim through quickly.

Since I get all the protolol jokes and I am sure there are very limited number of people on this earth who gets them, I feel like I am part of some technology brotherhood and that makes me feel good :)

Oh, so you have SCTP and DCCP support too ?

Some of those are suprisingly funny. I would really like to see some kind of voting / sorting option, so the better ones can float to the top (although that would break the ...fragmentation... jokes)

Would it? Part of the joke is that it may never get there ;)

Too many jokes from yoshicool. One of these puns is funny. One about every TCP protocol from 1 to 1024 is ... unfunny.

Did you hear the one about HTTP? Transfer-encoding: chunked.

(See? Not funny.)

For the HTTP joke to be funny, you would need to sniff the content-type first.

Interesting to see a seemingly premium domain devoted to geeky jokes, with no ads or solicitation.

I was amused by #protolol jokes on twitter. Wanted to collect them in one place. Wrote a simple GAE python application that would search for a particular hash tag and post the selected tweets to your tumblr blog. Fixing some usability issues. Will post the link soon :)

The problem with HackerNews jokes is that you get labelled as Redditer and get downvotted

The problem with Java Reference jokes is that you have to continually reference them. Otherwise they just become garbage.

I'd tell you an X11 joke, but you don't have the PROTOCOL_JOKE extension.


There might actually be some educational value to this.

I just linked a bunch of them into one of my networking modules for my highschool kids. Little evaluation exercise on whether they understand the concepts or not :)

Wait, your highschool kids don't have tumblr yet?

I'd like to share my SCSI joke, but I already told it 7 times.

You must add a voting function! I want to upvote/downvote!

Now there are at least two redditors in this thread.

Why would anyone make an instance of abstract art?

Don't quit() the daily job.

My favorite is from a friend at work @Dispensa:

There... There is... There is nothing... There is nothing funny about path MTU detection.

I scanned a dozen or so of the jokes and didn't find any of it funny.

Oh man,it would be great if all the jokes come with doodles

These are awesome! Why have I not seen this before?!

Why did the two lisp atoms lose all their money?

They got consed

Without loss of generality, let us assume that all mathematical jokes are funny.

I thought this would be about social protocols. Do you have some of these?

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