Not using FKs essentially means eventual consistency, and it's on you to ensure it. Obviously, eventual consistency is something a lot of systems have to settle for, often for reasons that have nothing to do with architecture, but just because of circumstances where you have to synchronize disparate systems and there's no way to eliminate all but one.
I'll note that there are very large systems that do provide ACID-like consistency (e.g., Spanner, Lustre), so it's not at all that "large -> eventual consistency".
I won't pass judgment on projects where eventual consistency was a given from the start, even if I might think they could have done better, but too, I wouldn't make either approach a hard and fast rule: circumstances vary. What bothers me is the extent to which I see "triggers bad", "FKs bad", "business logic in the DB bad" blanket statements out there.
I'll note that there are very large systems that do provide ACID-like consistency (e.g., Spanner, Lustre), so it's not at all that "large -> eventual consistency".
I won't pass judgment on projects where eventual consistency was a given from the start, even if I might think they could have done better, but too, I wouldn't make either approach a hard and fast rule: circumstances vary. What bothers me is the extent to which I see "triggers bad", "FKs bad", "business logic in the DB bad" blanket statements out there.