* cloud storage/calendar/contacts sync with the likes of Nextcloud,
* email server and webmail client with the likes of Mailpile,
* group/instant messaging with the likes of Mattermost,
https://privacytools.io is a good place to get started, albeit slightly more paranoid than most of us.
One thing that's a bit unfortunate to me is that domains don't practically seem to have much "resolution" compared to home addresses. Of course there is a whole hierarchy with countries, states, and even cities, but at end of the day many people like me simply have a domain [firstname][lastname].com. But where does that leave all of the other Firstname Lastnames out there? And then when I actually setup email addresses I can throw in all these different users (which I do...e.g. ml@ for mailing lists and todo@ for a todo dump), but they are all pointing at me in the end. Publicly I basically only have one email address that others use even though i could have *@domain.
I'm honestly not even that clear on exactly what the problem here is. It seems that basically the point is that a domain originally was meant to map to an larger organization probably with an administrator, whereas if you want to use it privately you basically need to treat yourself as that one person organization. Something feels a bit off, but I don't know quite what it is...
This befuddles me.
Gmail search often leaves out results I know are there, and sometimes comes up erroneously empty. I can verify this, because I store my emails offline. They are indexed by notmuch. I find notmuch to be not only faster than gmail search, but far more thorough: notmuch gives me hits that gmail skips.
Running the same very low result count returning search queries in other parts of googles data sprawl sometimes returns different sized outputs. There's more than one reason they stopped telling you how many search results there were, my guess is consistent inconsistencies is another.
The running yearly average false negative rate for me is currently 6.5%, which isn't perfect but it's survivable. It's hard to say what false positive rate is, but over the years I can't remember an instance where I would go fishing in the spam folder for a mail I knew I should receive (I do have classification settings very much biased towards false-negative rather than false-positive)
 - http://www.gabacho-net.jp/en/anti-spam/anti-spam-system.html
Q: I want to manage my own email, what about people’s solutions can ensure that outgoing mail is not shunned by the big players?
Also ensure your sending IP addresses are not in known 'residential' blocks (ie you'll need a VPS at least to use the IP address) and not blacklisted by previous owners.